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Go Back   REVscene Automotive Forum > Vancouver LifeStyles (VLS) > Relationship & Gender Discussion

The thin line between love and hate
Mature discussion about understanding the opposite sex...

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Old 06-21-2009, 09:12 PM   #1
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The following is an Anonymous submission from a Revscene member. If the OP would like to respond to anything said in this thread, please PM me.

Me and gf was driving around one day when she said something that really pissed me off and the argument began and I told her I wanted to break up with her. She started crying and I started driving her home but on the way her crying was so distracting I got into a minor accident. I'm completely fine but gf has some leg injuries.

The problem is that I don't want to be with my gf anymore, it completly pisses me off that I damaged my newly painted car from her annoying crying. I'm so pissed off as now I have to deal with icbc and gf's parents want to make a big fuss out of it and sue me or some shit. Gf went to hospital and I heard from her friend that she won't beable to use her leg to run. Some of my friends are telling me I have the responsibility to take care of her even though I broke up with her in the car. She kept calling me and texting me asking for me to visit but I don't really care about her anymore so I just igored it.

What should I do? Pretend to care and visit her at the hospital so her parents won't sue me? I mean to be honest I'm fucking pissed off having to deal with my car and icbc I don't have time to care about her problems. And also are my friends right? Do I have the responsiblity to take care of her even though it's her fault we got into the accident?

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Old 06-21-2009, 09:47 PM   #2
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You are just childish beyond belief.

IF it was a bloody stranger that was beside you while you crashed would you visited her? I would think Yes.

You're a douchebag and a dumb ass.
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Old 06-21-2009, 09:51 PM   #3
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My god, you are crap. It's not her fault the accident happened, essentially it is still your fault because you were in the drivers seat. Her crying played the role of the distraction but it was still your responsibility to take care at the wheel. If it distracted you so much, you should have taken more caution on the road by slowing down, ignore everything but the road, stop the car OR tell the gf to STFU.

But to your problem... since you dont want to be with her and you technically broke up during the car ride, I firmly think you should still take responsibility but not as the BF. Sorry to say but I doubt the gf's parents are gonna think highly of 'she was crying thats why u crashed the car' sort of excuse. Either way, you might be in for some legal problems if the parents choose to take action. The more you be ignorent and insensitive to the situation, the more fuel you are adding to the fire. You should probably try to positively contribute to the situation. So you should probably visit her so that the parents don't think you're the dick they should sue.

Be the responsible individual, not the caring boyfriend. Remind her you're not her bf anymore but you are concerned and have a duty here. Be firm about that.

ALSO: Check as to whether she "can't run anymore". Don't trust what her friend says.
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Old 06-21-2009, 09:59 PM   #4
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Old 06-21-2009, 10:12 PM   #5
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im sorry to break it to you, but its YOUR fault she got injured and its YOUR fault YOU crashed. you don't have to spoon feed her while shes in the hospital, but at the same time you should show some responsibility.
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Old 06-21-2009, 10:13 PM   #6
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dude sorry thats lame excuse to blame the accident on her

ur the one who made her cry in the first place

at least visit her as a friend.
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Old 06-21-2009, 10:14 PM   #7
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How minor really was the accident if it was enough to cause leg injuries ?
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Old 06-21-2009, 10:20 PM   #8, where our google ads make absolutely no sense!
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visit her
her friends lie
completely your fault
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Old 06-21-2009, 10:30 PM   #9
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yeah visit her dont be an ass hole
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Old 06-21-2009, 10:46 PM   #10
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Bunch of bleeding hearts.

You already broke up with that girl. You are no longer interested in being with her. Even if her parents sue you, being a car accident, the money will most likely come from ICBC since it was an accident.
Sucks to be her, but in the end you have no responsibility to go see her, legally.
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Old 06-21-2009, 11:01 PM   #11, where our google ads make absolutely no sense!
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It's true that you don't have the responsibility to see her.
You don't have to see her on a rational point of view.

However, on a morally point of view, yes, you should see her.
You trying to advert your problem all on to her. Your friends know about this,
what do they think? Your image, your reputation goes down the drain. You lose a social circle. Rumors spread.

Let's take another look at this:

1. You tell your GF that you break up with her in the car.
2. She starts crying (which was initiated by your remark of breaking up)
3. You get into accident and blame her crying.

My question is... who started the crying?

Are you sure you are not to blame for ANYTHING at all?

Now what do you think my opinion is?
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Old 06-21-2009, 11:17 PM   #12
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You're a dick
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Old 06-21-2009, 11:51 PM   #13
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how can an accident be minor if "she can not run forever"? either way, you need to grow a heart. you are responsible for the accident because:
1. you are the operator of the vehicle
2. you are the source of the distraction. you are the one who made her cry first.
3. your duty as a driver is to either drive safely, or in your case, stop the car and remove the distraction first.

you're a dick. you are responsible and should visit her at the very least. as a friend or whatever. a human is worth more than your car. your car and your paint isnt really worth much.
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Old 06-21-2009, 11:58 PM   #14
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Well when the accident happened only passenger side of the car was damaged and her leg was bleeding. Got confirmed that she got some pelvis damages and she's still in the hospital. Why is this all my fault? If she didn't piss me off in the first place this wouldn't of happened. Her best friend passed away last month and since then she's been acting all crazy and emotional. But cmon it's been a whole freaking month now and she's still going crazy so I just want to break up with her and cut all ties. I dont' want to make any visits as I am fucking pissed off about my car and she didn't bother once apologizing to me about pissing me off.
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Old 06-22-2009, 12:09 AM   #15
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You are completely heartless. A person > a car. If there are any permanent damages she has to live with it forever. She's already heart broken about her friend but instead of helping her through it you add on to her heart break. You are sick.
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Old 06-22-2009, 12:16 AM   #16
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It was a minor accident and she was bleeding/has pelvic damage? Sounds more than minor to me. You're an asshole. Plain and simple. You don't get over your best friend dying in a month. Asshole, hopefully karma kicks you in the ass and you smash up your precious car. Dickwad.
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Old 06-22-2009, 12:34 AM   #17
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learn how to drive. behind the wheel it is your responsiblity for all possible distractions and safety for yourself and others in the car. what are you going to do when you have children and they start crying in the backseat? are you going to blame it on their crying when you break their legs from being an irresponsible driver?

if you didn't feel competant (which obviously you are not) then you should pulled over and got your thoughts together before continuing on the road instead of being a health hazard for the public.

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Old 06-22-2009, 12:43 AM   #18
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Wow, talk about immature and selfish.
You no longer like her because she's upset that her friend passed away?
How about being more supportive?
If your best friend died, you wouldn't mind if your girlfriend told you to suck it up?
As if things aren't bad enough for her losing her friend, you break up with her because of it? Wow, just wow.
And now you're crying over your car and putting the blame on her for your accident.
Who initiated the crying?
You could've picked a better time and place to break up with her.
If you can't handle the crying and driving then don't put yourself in that situation to begin with, it's your fault she's injured and all you can think about is your stupid car?
Too bad it wasn't you that was injured..

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Old 06-22-2009, 12:50 AM   #19
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her friend passed away she was just was looking for some emotional support from you. everyone has their own mourning process. but it turned out that she was becoming a toxic person. in other words, an emotional vampire that was draining you.

you should have ended the relationship in a more controlled situation. yes, her crying was distracting, but it was you that caused her to cry. everything has a cause and effect. so you have some responsibility in this situation. especially being the driver and the breaking-upper.

so its really a tough call. personally I stay clear of emotional vampires. they don't help you in anyway and just drain you dry. sorry to say, but you still got to visit her, but keep the visits at a bare minimum. Don't do or say anything to provoke her. Ask her how she is. Give her words of encouragement. She needs it. Be courteous. She also might feel a bit guilty herself having a part in this accident. So you need to iron things out and level things out with her before you can really leave her. because if you end all contact with her at this moment, she'll still occupy your thoughts and you'll be arguing with her in your mind. so really homeboy, do this for peace and tranquility and get it over with.

Lemme tell you something. read between the lines. I doubt she will sue you because she loves you. So that's the last thing you gotta worry about.
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Old 06-22-2009, 12:52 AM   #20
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I want details of the car accident.

So let me get this straight- you broke up with her because she's emotionally unstable from her bestfriend's death last month?

You got into an accident because of this and all you're worried about is your car and dealing with ICBC? You're a fucking piece of work, I must admit.

You obviously have not experienced losing someone dear to you. FYI, shit's not easy to get over. Not in a month, sometimes not even a year is enough.

You fail as a boyfriend for not being able to provide emotional support for the person who needed you the most. Sounds like you're an immature bastard.

I'm not even gonna suggest trying to understand her situation because your brain probably cannot even begin to comprehend it.

Do the world a favor, don't enter another relationship because you're obviously too immature to understand what's most important.

Yeah, you lose money and your car is damage- BOO FUCKING HOO, GO CRY ME A FUCKING RIVER- Guess what Einstein, those things are replaceable. Her bestfriend and Her ability to run? are you able to bring those back? Try using your sorry-excuse-for-a-brain and tell me which weighs more.

Do her a favor- Don't show your sorry ass infront of her ever again. She's better off alone than being with someone who's priorities and maturity levels are less than that of a 5 year old. Better yet, go jump off a bridge.

I'm not angry btw. =]

Last edited by ecchiecchi; 06-22-2009 at 01:33 AM.
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Old 06-22-2009, 12:58 AM   #21
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Wow, you are a major douchebag.
I can't believe you are "pissed off" at dealing with ICBC and blaming the girl. Seriously, she's injured from your irresponsibility. She's laying in a hospital bed. Her best friend past away a while ago. You have not visited her and you are complaining about ICBC and your car?

It's really sad to think someone can have such a lack of decency and morals.

On the other hand, I don't think you have the responsibility to take care of her. It's your choice on how much you want to do for her, but even if you choose to do nothing, at least grow a fucking pair and visit her.
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Old 06-22-2009, 01:30 AM   #22
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I'm not going to go into the particulars and the morals because I dislike jumping to conclusions about people I can't see beyond text,
so particulars aside, you DON'T have any legal responsibilities to visit her; however pelvic damage from a "minor car crash" seems pretty unlikely, and you probably will have other legal responsibilities as the operator of the car at the time.

but even with the particulars aside, and your personal morals aside, despite you being turned off by her presence, I think you should still make the effort to drop by once or twice. Regardless of whether or not it was actually her "fault" that you got into an accident, you were the one behind the wheels.

What you make of this morally though, is entirely up to you.

Whatever the case though, good luck.


Last edited by Culture_Vulture; 06-22-2009 at 01:38 AM. Reason: I cn'at tpye.
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Old 06-22-2009, 01:45 AM   #23
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Also, regardless of whether or not you think so yourself,
from a rational standpoint, you are being arrogant about this whole situation.

Still with all morals and values aside, the remaining issue standing would be legal issues.
If her or her parents decide to take legal action (which is entirely possible with the attitude you're presenting them with right now), you'd be in for a bumpy ride.

So you figure out whether your ego will outweigh the consequences and outcomes.

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Old 06-22-2009, 01:47 AM   #24
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wow didnt know dick heads like you exist
(judging from your posts anyway)

what did she even say to piss you off so bad? it must have been something REALLLLLY harsh to have you value ur cars paint over her well being

i mean she shouldnt even have to ASK you to visit, but she had to go the distance to ask you only to be turned down... you gotta be kidding me

is the op serious, is this a troll thread?

was mentioned earlier in this thread but you should man up and take responsibility, even if you feel you're not at fault i mean she was ur girlfriend at one point.... shes going through a difficult time period and is in need of help
put aside your own feelings for once
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Old 06-22-2009, 01:49 AM   #25
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you fucked up
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Last edited by LsquareD on 00-00-0000 at 00:00 PM
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