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The thin line between love and hate
Mature discussion about understanding the opposite sex...

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Old 07-16-2012, 03:48 PM   #1
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Ex Gf Friends with Benefits

Was wondering what you guys out there think about being friends with benefits with an ex-girlfriend for 5 and a half years. It was her suggestion to be friends with benefits with me. We have been broken up for about a few months now.

Leave me some feedback guys.


Thanks.

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Old 07-16-2012, 03:54 PM   #2
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who broke it off before?
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Old 07-16-2012, 03:54 PM   #3
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She broke it off with me
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Old 07-16-2012, 03:55 PM   #4
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Who cares.

YES
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Old 07-16-2012, 03:55 PM   #5
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She said she needed space. So I let her have her space
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Old 07-16-2012, 03:56 PM   #6
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It's all fun and games until either you or her starts Falling for each other again. Say you fall back in love with her and want than just what's between her legs or vice-versa. Are you willing to take that gamble?
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Old 07-16-2012, 03:59 PM   #7
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It's all fun and games until either you or her starts Falling for each other again. Say you fall back in love with her and want than just what's between her legs or vice-versa. Are you willing to take that gamble?
This is the first time I have encountered this type of situation. I actually like being single now and I do not want to be in another relationship for a while. I just wanna concentrate on myself and if this is what she wants then I will play along with it
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Old 07-16-2012, 04:04 PM   #8
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FWB can and can not work based on the couple involved.
Rules MUST be FIRMLY in placed prior to engaging.
It is extremely complicated as you guys were in a prior long term relationship

There are two paths with very different endings.

1. Everything plays according to plans. BOTH of you keeps emotions separate from the "FWB." When it comes time to end, a discussion happens and the FWB ends happily and peacefully.

2. One of you will start to re-develop feelings and start to take the FWB relationship too seriously. Jealousy develops and starts to impede on the other individual. A bitter argument will happen and feelings of regret will surface.


I personally don't think going into FWB with your ex is a good idea. There has to be some residual feelings left over from your relationship. You guys did go out for 5+years. It will get messy/complicated fast.

Also, how did you guys break up? The thought that she is using the FWB as a means to get together with you again crossed my mind immediately.
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Old 07-16-2012, 04:09 PM   #9
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Even with rules it's hard at times to stick to them...

Had the same suggestion with my ex before and she always wanted to stick around and cuddle afterwards which eventually lead to wanting to go out to eat, etc. I always shut it down and it didnt last too long because of that.
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Old 07-16-2012, 04:18 PM   #10
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FWB can and can not work based on the couple involved.
Rules MUST be FIRMLY in placed prior to engaging.
It is extremely complicated as you guys were in a prior long term relationship

There are two paths with very different endings.

1. Everything plays according to plans. BOTH of you keeps emotions separate from the "FWB." When it comes time to end, a discussion happens and the FWB ends happily and peacefully.

2. One of you will start to re-develop feelings and start to take the FWB relationship too seriously. Jealousy develops and starts to impede on the other individual. A bitter argument will happen and feelings of regret will surface.


I personally don't think going into FWB with your ex is a good idea. There has to be some residual feelings left over from your relationship. You guys did go out for 5+years. It will get messy/complicated fast.

Also, how did you guys break up? The thought that she is using the FWB as a means to get together with you again crossed my mind immediately.

She told me one day that she wanted time and space for herself and that we should go on a break, which leaded to a break up. I cut communication with her for a while and recently she had been calling me, so I called her back to see whats up and there she suggested the FWB.
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Old 07-16-2012, 04:22 PM   #11
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DO NOT DO IT. I did it with my ex who broke it off with me and it turned me into an emotional wreck. Granted maybe it was because she just one day stopped calling me and didn't speak to me for over a year, but either way it's not a good idea. Someone will get hurt in the end
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Old 07-16-2012, 04:26 PM   #12
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It's a trap.
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Old 07-16-2012, 04:31 PM   #13
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sounds ... like a trap

but... have a try first
let us know
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Old 07-16-2012, 04:37 PM   #14
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Everyone says nothing will happen. Truth is someone ALWAYS wants it to be more and the other doesn't.
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Old 07-16-2012, 04:40 PM   #15
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I think murd0c has some success in a FWB relationship....but I don't think it was an ex.

I Have had friends who have tried it....it never ends well. super messy...fucked up feelings....a lot of tears and jealousy (on both ends) and turned exes into huge enemies.
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Old 07-16-2012, 04:45 PM   #16
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your ex from 5 years ago
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Old 07-16-2012, 04:46 PM   #17
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Like everyone else has said, don't do it. It'll always end up messy due to one party using it as an attempt to "get together". Stay away from ex's.
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Old 07-16-2012, 05:26 PM   #18
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I don't see a problem with it unless you guys are 18. If you're both adults, just get your rocks off and go home. When one of you finds someone serious, cut contact until you're both single again.
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Old 07-16-2012, 05:33 PM   #19
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it's all good till someone starts catching feelings again

keep it strictly to fucking, once you get bored, leave
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Old 07-16-2012, 06:33 PM   #20
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I'm 24 and she is 23. I do not have a romantic feeling for her anymore and since she needs me physically for sex, I'm just going to play along.

Thread closed.

Thank you all for your feedback.
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Old 07-16-2012, 06:47 PM   #21
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Wrap that shit up.
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Old 07-16-2012, 06:51 PM   #22
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So...why did you ask for feedback if you were gonna do it anyway?
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Old 07-16-2012, 06:52 PM   #23
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DONT DO IT
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Old 07-16-2012, 06:57 PM   #24
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So...why did you ask for feedback if you were gonna do it anyway?
well he wanted some feedback and he got some, but after considering, he probably thought being FWB isn't that bad.
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Old 07-16-2012, 07:26 PM   #25
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well he wanted some feedback and he got some, but after considering, he probably thought being FWB isn't that bad.
Which leads back to what everyone said, DONT DO IT
Oh well..
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