REVscene - Vancouver Automotive Forum


Welcome to the REVscene Automotive Forum forums.

Registration is Free!You are currently viewing our boards as a guest which gives you limited access to view most discussions and access our other features. By joining our free community you will have access to post topics, communicate privately with other members (PM), respond to polls, upload content and access many other special features. Registration is fast, simple and absolutely free so please, join our community today! The banners on the left side and below do not show for registered users!

If you have any problems with the registration process or your account login, please contact contact us.

Go Back   REVscene Automotive Forum > Vancouver LifeStyles (VLS) > Relationship & Gender Discussion

Relationship & Gender Discussion THIS SPACE OPEN FOR ADVERTISEMENT. YOU SHOULD BE ADVERTISING HERE!
The thin line between love and hate
Mature discussion about understanding the opposite sex...

Reply
 
Thread Tools
Old 05-28-2009, 02:58 PM   #1
Pull Out Towing. Women rescued for free.
 
SumAznGuy's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: Hongcouver
Posts: 7,486
Thanked 1,879 Times in 994 Posts
Learning to live with in-laws

So my wife told me this story about her friend and I think I know what I would do, but would like to see what you guys think.

Her friend, both husband and wife are chinese, got married 2 years ago and now they live in the husband's parent's basement to save money. They own 2 condo's up on SFU that they are currently renting out but do not pay any rent to the husband's parents.

When they got married, the cost of the wedding was paid by the bride and groom. Neither families had to pay anything for the wedding. One of the bride's friends gave her a huge sum of $$$ as a wedding gift. But because the bride and groom was busy, the friend gave the $$$ to the husband's parents. It's been 2 years, the parents never gave the bride and groom the money.

Obviously the bride is pissed off about it, and I would be too, assuming the parent's didn't just plain forget.

Because they are living in the basement, the young couple spent $20K of their own money to renovate and re-furnish the basement. Well, the father will come downstairs and sit his ass on the new couch and watch their tv. This kinda erks the wife because a) it's "their" couch and "their" tv. b) she finds it a little awkward especially when she is downstairs alone.

As well, the wife is preggers and plan on having 2 kids. Since they are living in the basement, you would think the grandparents would be more than happy to sit the grandkids. Well, the husbands parents have said outright that they are not going to sit the kids for them while the young couple work in the days. The husband's parents are in their early 50's and both are retired.

Lastly, when she is doing the laundry, sometimes the mom will come down and take her clothes out of the dryer and lay them in an empty basket. The wife is a bit of a neet freak and doesn't like other people to touch her laundry and not to put them in a dirty basket.

Personally, I think they need to cut their losses short and move out. Either live in one of the condo's they own, or rent. But either way, just move out to avoid getting into any more fights with the husband's parents. They need their own space from the husband's parents or else this can/will cause a rift in their relationship.

__________________
Originally posted by Iceman_19 you should have tried to touch his penis. that really throws them off.
Originally posted by The7even SumAznGuy > Billboa
Originally posted by 1990TSI SumAznGuy> Internet > tinytrix
(11-0-0) Buy/Sell rating
Christine
Shitvic
Pull Out Towing
SumAznGuy is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-28-2009, 03:00 PM   #2
Banned (ABWS)
 
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: vancouver
Posts: 1,936
Thanked 233 Times in 129 Posts
move out asap, tell the husband to have a chat with the parents about all those issues
liu13 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-28-2009, 03:51 PM   #3
Mod.
 
!Nhan's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2003
Location: east vanner
Posts: 7,133
Thanked 1,768 Times in 683 Posts
Quote:
Originally Posted by liu13 View Post
move out asap, tell the husband to have a chat with the parents about all those issues
Couldn't agree more. There isn't any other alternative other than moving out. I mean they're not paying rent so they can't really say anything about the husbands parents. Move out or live with it.
__________________
NiteShadow
flickR
93 Civic Si (RIP)
97 Civic CX (POS)

!Nhan is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-28-2009, 04:28 PM   #4
OMGWTFBBQ is a common word I say everyday
 
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: Vancouver
Posts: 5,146
Thanked 160 Times in 74 Posts
Quote:
Originally Posted by !nhan View Post
Couldn't agree more. There isn't any other alternative other than moving out. I mean they're not paying rent so they can't really say anything about the husbands parents. Move out or live with it.
actually, its the husband's fault for these problems.

The husband could have talked to his parents about the money, the dry cleaning thing, the wandering pervert thing and they would have been fixed right then and there.

As for baby sitting, she can start paying rent and tell the granps that "no babysitting, no baby playing time".

That or move out they have 2 fucking condos for crying out loud.
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by Fei-Ji View Post
haha i can taste the cum in my mouth
There is a time when you have to sig a post.

It just happened.
wouwou is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-28-2009, 04:40 PM   #5
Willing to sell body for a few minutes on RS
 
quasi's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2001
Location: Cloverdale
Posts: 10,231
Thanked 2,279 Times in 827 Posts
LOL, money issue aside they live there rent free and are mad because their parents won't babysit? Seriously, they have it so good they don't even realize the small invonviences are just that. If they don't like it do what other people do and move into one of their places they are renting out.

When people get older generally speaking the last thing they want to do is be fulltime babysitter.

I love my parents but I could never live with them now that I have my own family and I'm sure they think likewise.
__________________



“The world ain't all sunshine and rainbows. It's a very mean and nasty place... and I donīt care how tough you are, it will beat you to your knees and keep you there permanently, if you let it. You, me or nobody, is gonna hit as hard as life. But ain't about how hard you hit... It's about how hard you can get hit, and keep moving forward... how much you can take, and keep moving forward. Thatīs how winning is done. Now, if you know what you worth, go out and get what you worth.” - Rocky Balboa
quasi is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-28-2009, 04:57 PM   #6
Hypa owned my ass at least once
 
Noir's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: Japan
Posts: 6,747
Thanked 1,314 Times in 540 Posts
It's a question that they can only answer for themselves, as everyone has different priorities at the moment.

They have to weigh out on their own what's more important to them:

*** The fact that they can live rent free and gain more money through investments (condo rentals)

*** Or take the financial hit but live comfortably on their own.

It's different for everyone and everyone has varying tolerances to these kind of things. So the only right answer is what's right for them.
Noir is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-28-2009, 05:06 PM   #7
Pull Out Towing. Women rescued for free.
 
SumAznGuy's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: Hongcouver
Posts: 7,486
Thanked 1,879 Times in 994 Posts
I agree with what has been said.

Ironically, the whole reason they own 2 condo's that are being rented out is because the husband felt they were behind financially and tried to rush things by buying 2 units. It's hard to grasp, I know. I feel the same way.
1 unit they put money down. The other unit is based on zero down. Both are 40 year mortgages from a few years ago.

And they are living at home because they want to save up and then move out, but with kids on the way, it looks as if the chance of them saving up enough money to move out is slim to none.
__________________
Originally posted by Iceman_19 you should have tried to touch his penis. that really throws them off.
Originally posted by The7even SumAznGuy > Billboa
Originally posted by 1990TSI SumAznGuy> Internet > tinytrix
(11-0-0) Buy/Sell rating
Christine
Shitvic
Pull Out Towing
SumAznGuy is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-28-2009, 05:37 PM   #8
I *Fwap* *Fwap* *Fwap* to RS
 
Join Date: Oct 2005
Location: vancouver
Posts: 1,568
Thanked 238 Times in 94 Posts
I would !!!
__________________
Q: What do you like most in a woman?
A: My dick

Quote:
Originally Posted by JL9000 View Post
this is the internet and everyone knows better about what happened sitting behind a desk than the people who are actually involved.
buddy is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-28-2009, 05:52 PM   #9
NSX
NA1
 
NSX's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2003
Location: .
Posts: 4,659
Thanked 853 Times in 172 Posts
How much was the sum that the father took?
NSX is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-28-2009, 06:01 PM   #10
Pull Out Towing. Women rescued for free.
 
SumAznGuy's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: Hongcouver
Posts: 7,486
Thanked 1,879 Times in 994 Posts
Quote:
Originally Posted by GSP View Post
How much was the sum that the father took?
$1000.
__________________
Originally posted by Iceman_19 you should have tried to touch his penis. that really throws them off.
Originally posted by The7even SumAznGuy > Billboa
Originally posted by 1990TSI SumAznGuy> Internet > tinytrix
(11-0-0) Buy/Sell rating
Christine
Shitvic
Pull Out Towing
SumAznGuy is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-28-2009, 06:52 PM   #11
Isaac's Hardstyle Sessions
 
Drow's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: Vancouver
Posts: 2,773
Thanked 1,807 Times in 547 Posts
well think about it this way, the parents raised the dude since he was a kid, so in a way the husband owes his parents for their troubles. Sure, continuing on like this would be a pain in the ass, but the husband and wife should be more ... lenient about the issue at hand
Drow is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-28-2009, 06:59 PM   #12
WOAH! i think Vtec just kicked in!
 
aznrsx1979's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2003
Location: Yaletown
Posts: 1,603
Thanked 26 Times in 25 Posts
For a $1000 that the parents took, I'd just forget about it. They've lived in the husbands parents place for 2 years which is a lot more then $1000.

The husband needs to talk to his parents to set some boundaries or to install locks on the door which I've seen some people do so there can be some privacy. As for the issue with the laundry, there's gonna need to be some compromise between the wife and mother in-law.
aznrsx1979 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-28-2009, 07:46 PM   #13
Ubereem Mod
 
Gt-R R34's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: Richmond
Posts: 3,070
Thanked 120 Times in 63 Posts
Quote:
Originally Posted by SumAznGuy View Post
I agree with what has been said.

Ironically, the whole reason they own 2 condo's that are being rented out is because the husband felt they were behind financially and tried to rush things by buying 2 units. It's hard to grasp, I know. I feel the same way.
1 unit they put money down. The other unit is based on zero down. Both are 40 year mortgages from a few years ago.

And they are living at home because they want to save up and then move out, but with kids on the way, it looks as if the chance of them saving up enough money to move out is slim to none.
If you don't mind me. I'm a fairly financial guy, (if you've been in the finance forums *shameless plug*). But if they bought few years ago, chances are they are still in the green, when it comes to those condos. If they want to move out, I would suggest selling of a condo and then living in other. This is the best way to ****LIVE WITHIN THEIR MEANS****. Investments can be had some other way, and yes they would probably have a DECENT but not a great profit from selling one of those condos.

Even as suggested they DP one, and Zero down one. It would tell me they do make very decent money. So yah,

As with anyone said before me. Pick the inconvience or move out =)
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by Culture_Vulture View Post
sometimes I like to use kindergarten art class scissors to cut my pubes
Gt-R R34 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-28-2009, 10:19 PM   #14
Rs has made me the man i am today!
 
Join Date: Sep 2002
Location: Vancouver
Posts: 3,105
Thanked 410 Times in 64 Posts
The parents need to give the couple their own space. If they can't do that, consider moving out.

It may not be awkward for the husband, but he's got to do something so the wife feels comfortable living in such conditions.
Dinan3 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-28-2009, 10:56 PM   #15
Pull Out Towing. Women rescued for free.
 
SumAznGuy's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: Hongcouver
Posts: 7,486
Thanked 1,879 Times in 994 Posts
Quote:
Originally Posted by Gt-R R34 View Post
If you don't mind me. I'm a fairly financial guy, (if you've been in the finance forums *shameless plug*). But if they bought few years ago, chances are they are still in the green, when it comes to those condos. If they want to move out, I would suggest selling of a condo and then living in other. This is the best way to ****LIVE WITHIN THEIR MEANS****. Investments can be had some other way, and yes they would probably have a DECENT but not a great profit from selling one of those condos.

Even as suggested they DP one, and Zero down one. It would tell me they do make very decent money. So yah,

As with anyone said before me. Pick the inconvience or move out =)
Nope, no shameless plug here.

In fact, i've been telling my wife the same thing since day 1 when they decided to buy the second condo. They basically bought it at the peak of the housing market when everything was really hot.

But it was the husband's idea to try to "catch up" to everyone else financially.

Even if they were to sell one of the units now, I think they would end up taking a pretty big loss, but that imo is better than living life so stretched financially, especially with another mouth on the way and plans for a second.
__________________
Originally posted by Iceman_19 you should have tried to touch his penis. that really throws them off.
Originally posted by The7even SumAznGuy > Billboa
Originally posted by 1990TSI SumAznGuy> Internet > tinytrix
(11-0-0) Buy/Sell rating
Christine
Shitvic
Pull Out Towing
SumAznGuy is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-28-2009, 11:01 PM   #16
HELP ME PLS!!!
 
nipples's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2002
Location: Vancouver
Posts: 5,560
Thanked 22 Times in 13 Posts
husband takes 500 bucks of his money n gives it to the wife. that'll be her half of the 1000. or all of it as it was her friend. Husband takes the hit and treats the grand as compensation for raising him.

the two of em move out. 20K they put into renovations unless arranged prior n discussed with the inlaws will never be seen again.
__________________
~goodnight fat sig.
nipples is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-29-2009, 01:05 AM   #17
Ready to be Man handled by RS!
 
happytoro's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2009
Location: Van
Posts: 77
Thanked 3 Times in 3 Posts
It was the couple's idea to renovate the basement because they get to live there for free. Just because they put some money into it doesn't mean all of a sudden that becomes their property. The father going down to watch tv on "their" couch because he probably doesn't think it's a big deal, he probably wouldn't mind if she goes up and sits on the couch upstairs.

And the whole sitting the kids thing...like what? So she can live there for free and is entitled to free babysitting for her kids? How about dishing out some money and hire a maid around the house to take care of the two retirees as well as the kids?

The wife is the only one making a big deal out of it...if she really can't stand it than do something about it. They are all family, if she can't open up to talk about it or do something it's her fault for feeling whatever she's feeling. Everyone else seems fine with it. The husband isn't doing anything because he doesn't think much of it since it's his parents.
happytoro is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-29-2009, 02:16 AM   #18
I keep RS good
 
Ulic Qel-Droma's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2001
Location: Cosmos
Posts: 28,361
Thanked 5,348 Times in 1,408 Posts
MOVE THE FUCK OUT.

sorry, chinese parents, they own you if you live under their roof, even if you contribute 100% to the maintenance of the place. they're chinese what the fuck do they expect? they parents are elder, therefore gods to the younger ones. there's no way out of that man. that shit can only be bred out by being raised a north american. and even then. if someone lives under my roof, i'm their boss unless they're tenants that pay and sign a contract. and even then. i'm still boss.

but the money the parents "got" for the wedding should be given to the couple.
__________________
nipples neways...wat is with those fuck'n asians! i mean you would think they've never seen a dentist in their life. are dentists really that rare over there in ricey ricey and? looks like they're star trek ferrengi rejects! fuck'n have broken glass for teeth! goddaymn! and the smell....did a rat crawl in there and shit itself then marinate in its own shit as it decayed?ewwwwwwwwww! i swear...if one of those ferrengi asian girls gave head...when u pull the dick out it looks like it went thru a meat grinder! prolly shaved off a few slices of meat! *shudder*
Greebo i t-boned some guy and killed their baby, it was funny
silvia i have a couple asian guy friends that do very well with the ladies. but guess what, they go to the gym, they dont have long hair, they dont wear orange pants, and they dont play counterstrike. its not the ethnicity that the girls dont like, its the style and personality.
450HP Supra I am about to use your eye sockets as a shoe rack for my nuts. ...something about chinks, j-bodys, I can't quite remember as I was drunk and looking for a girl to punch in the clit. Think of it as a digital urinal, and you are the mint, except, instead of actually smelling mint, you smell like mothballs, rotten kimchee and virginity. I'm about to start drinking heavily now and you better be gone before I get back or I swear to god I will break the internet over my knee and use the pieces to beat you in the deformed skull with, cock muffler.
Iceman-19 If your gf cooks and cleans, good, tell the guy to take a fucking hike. If she doesnt, fuck, that joker can have her. Lifes too short to cook your own meals and do your own laundry, thats what women are for!
http://ho316.tumblr.com
Ulic Qel-Droma is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-29-2009, 09:04 AM   #19
Rs has made me the woman i am today!
 
Join Date: Aug 2001
Location: Vancouver, BC,
Posts: 4,230
Thanked 28 Times in 27 Posts
Both of them should of moved out.. especially if they have two condos already... they want to have kids and expect the parents to baby sit ?? that isn't too fair either..

i think they should open their eyes... move out.. don't ask for the money back from the parents.. and just find a baby sitter..

if they can't afford all of that.. sell one of their condos.. they don't have money to invest for the future if they can't take care of themselves now !
__________________
i need powah !
hamsup is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-29-2009, 09:27 AM   #20
RS.net, helping ugly ppl have sex since 2001
 
Gumby's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2002
Location: Vancouver
Posts: 9,261
Thanked 2,318 Times in 872 Posts
Let this be a lesson to all:

Do not live with your wife in your parents' house. It's a recipe for disaster. Women cannot live with their in-laws.

Guys are different cuz they don't care.
__________________
Do Not Put Aftershave on Your Balls. -604CEFIRO
Looks like I'm gonna have some hot sex again tonight...OOPS i got the 6 pack. that wont last me the night, I better go back and get the 24 pack! -Turbo E
kinda off topic but obama is a dilf - miss_crayon
Honest to fucking Christ the easiest way to get a married woman in the mood is clean the house and do the laundry.....I've been with the same girl almost 17 years, ask me how I know. - quasi
Gumby is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-29-2009, 09:34 AM   #21
14 dolla balla aint got nothing on me!
 
bsftong's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2004
Location: Richmond
Posts: 696
Thanked 16 Times in 11 Posts
The golden rule of parents: "My house, my rules". I thought that was stupid and never liked it while growing up, but as soon as I got my own place, I fully appreciate that rule.

If they can't stand living with the in-laws, their only option is to move out. Or just STFU and deal with it. Sounds like the parents are in the wrong in this situation, but there is 0% chance that the parents will change their perspective and/or attitude. Which is quite sad, as both sides will just start distancing from each other and the family just wouldn't be the same anymore.
bsftong is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-29-2009, 09:37 AM   #22
Need my Daily Fix of RS
 
n1smo's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Richmond
Posts: 260
Thanked 4 Times in 3 Posts
move out with the cash
n1smo is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-29-2009, 09:40 AM   #23
Need to Seek Professional Help
 
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: Richmond
Posts: 1,097
Thanked 206 Times in 71 Posts
Lol- I don't really see any issue here besides the fact that the wife is being a big baby about the whole issue. Crying over $1,000? If it was $50k or even $10k, i'd understand. If they have enough money to afford 2 condos, $1,000 is a small price to pay to be able to live in their parent's house for free. Think of it as a $42/month rent (less the longer they stay there). Even IF, hypothetically, the parents said that the basement is their property, who's kitchen do they use? who's parking space do they use? The whole "it's my couch" thing is such a stupid issue.

And holy fkin crap- what's wrong about the parents not wanting to babysit? GTFO and get a babysitter. They're already saving so much by being able to live at a place rent free. I think it's just a case of the wife being greedy and not being able to appreciate what the parents have done for them.

I think the whole underlying issue is that- the wife hates the parents. If she didn't, this whole thing wouldn't be such a big issue. Not everything revolves around her. If she feels it's too awkward to be around the in-laws, no one's stopping her from getting close to them and changing that.

If she's not willing to make compromises and if she's gonna keep thinking that she deserves the things she demands- GTFO and move out. No one's forcing them to keep living down there.
__________________
:o
ecchiecchi is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-29-2009, 11:18 AM   #24
RS controls my life!
 
Wetordry's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2002
Posts: 712
Thanked 41 Times in 31 Posts
consider the $1000 to cover all the free rent they had

move out

quit complaining.
Wetordry is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-29-2009, 11:47 AM   #25
Banned By Establishment
 
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: Richmond
Posts: 12,489
Thanked 2,090 Times in 773 Posts
hiep?
Meowjin is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply
Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off



All times are GMT -8. The time now is 03:26 AM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.7
Copyright ©2000 - 2017, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
SEO by vBSEO ©2011, Crawlability, Inc.
Revscene.net cannot be held accountable for the actions of its members nor does the opinions of the members represent that of Revscene.net