[Confidential] When will I start feeling "Thats the one"
 

The following is an Anonymous submission from a Revscene member. If the OP would like to respond to anything said in this thread, please PM me.


When do guys start feeling that they are with the girl who's "the one"? Now I know it's different for everyone so I'm asking for what YOU think or felt or feel.

I know I'm still young, just turned 23, have a gf I've been dating for almost 2 years. My gf seems pretty serious with me, attempted to talk about the future with me but I change the topic. She drops random questions to try to choke out some sigh of long-term commitment out of me. Just the other day she was asking me why I want to be with her and the outcome I'm seeking out of it. She was abit choked when I just said I wanted to be with her and went completely silent when I sorta indirectly said getting married and having kids isn't something I think about and won't for a long while.

She doesn't want to get married until shes 29 or so but I guess she's looking for some sort of commitment on my end. I'm not screwing around with my gf but I don't know if this is serious or not or what I really want out of this relationship. Will I feel different later on? When will I start feeling someone is "the one"? Insights please!

I was still pursueing my dreams when I was 23, and my friend has 2 little kids already when he was 23. So don't keep telling yourself, "oh I have to get married before 30 or won't have kids until 35" Marriage is just an agreement to settle down, if you don't want to settle down that earlier, just tell her directly rather than letting her to guess what you are thinking. It tends to make the girls less secure and have a lot of hypothesis in their mind.

Probably when you couldn't imagine life without her

everyone is different like asian xl said above just depends on what you want in life

I waited 6 years and lived with her first to be sure. I plan on being on the right end of the 50 percentile of marriages that don't work. married almost 5 years now, together for over 12 and although we have our rough patches the good times far outweigh the bad. I have friends that play the field quite a bit and sometimes envy them but at the end of the day without her I'd be seriously lost. I'll have to settle for living vicariously through some of my friends and the stories they have as far as what could have been if I decided to dabble a bit more. :)

On the subject of playing the field vs settling down I find it kind of funny. I had this conversation about a month ago with one of my best friend who is by all definitions of the word a player. Once in a while he'll tell me some of the funnier stories that happened or what he was up to without getting into to much detail. He was bitching about how he wishes he could just find one girl and settle down with her. I told him I wish I could be him for a month. He then went on to say he'd switch places with me in a second, he's like your set. No matter where on the fence you sit the grass always seems greener on the other side.

When you not just want, but feel that you NEED to make that person happy, and you wouldn't be unless they are too.

Sounds weird, but not really?

you know she is "the one" when you are so sure that you have absolutley no doubt to think otherwise ...

.. or when you have no need to ask for other people's insight from the internet

i honestly think you just know, no if ands or buts.

the whole 'you can't imagine life without them along with not being able to picture yourself with anyone but them' though cheesey, is true.

i think women in general tend to want to settle earlier due to the whole issue with the biological clock. those who are looking to settle in their 20's probably have a pretty good idea of what they want in life and just want to make sure they're not 'wasting their time' (so to speak) with someone who's not heading in the same direction with them.

if she's not cool with the fact that you aren't planning to settle down anytime soon, then maybe it's time for a talk.

You don't love someone for their looks, or their clothes, or for their fancy car, but because they sing a song only you can hear.

deep.

+1

I liked your post. Wishing your marriage many years of happienss.

you know she/he is the one when they bring out that little kid side out of you.

despite how old you are.

When she's pregnant.

when there's no one else in this world that you'd rather be with (even if they are smokin hot super models) because the one you have understands you enough to be able to make you happy day in and out.
you know that no matter what, she'll always be by your side and down to be your partner in crime.