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Quote:

The following post is a set of e-mails from me actually trying to sell my TV. I guess I was asking too much for it.
Original ad:
PLASMA HDTV - $850
I'm selling my 42" 720p Samsung Plasma TV (PN42A410). I bought it a year ago and there is nothing wrong with it. I just want to get a bigger TV with more P's.
From ************@yahoo.com to Me

hey will you take $700 for it

From Me to ************@yahoo.com

You are asking me to drop the price by $150. I am willing to do this if you let me shoot you in the groin with my paintball gun 20 times in a row. You can't wear a cup. I get to set the velocity to 450 FPS.

From ************@yahoo.com to Me

seriously?

From Me to ************@yahoo.com

Yes. 20 shots and its yours.

From ************@yahoo.com to Me

uhh no. hows $750 sound

From Me to ************@yahoo.com

Do you have a girlfriend? If you do, and she is hot (I'll need pics), and she blows me, you can have the TV for $750. You can't watch either.

From ************@yahoo.com to Me

fuck off dude

From Me to ************@yahoo.com

Tell you what, I'll sell it to you for $900 and you won't have to do any of that stuff.

From ************@yahoo.com to Me

wtf your ad said $850

From Me to ************@yahoo.com

I added $50 for you trying to haggle me. I'll remove this $50 haggling fee if you let me break an empty vodka bottle over your head.

From ************@yahoo.com to Me

fuck off

Quote:

From **************@comcast.net to Me

A TV like that goes for $699 brand new at Best Buy. I'll give you $400 for it?

From Me to **************@comcast.net

For $400, I will cut the TV in half with a sawzall and give you half of it. Which half would you like? The left half has all of the HDMI inputs, and the right half has the power/channel/input buttons.

From **************@comcast.net to Me

I guess I'm going to Best Buy...

From Me to **************@comcast.net

WAIT! Before you go to Best Buy, consider my new offer:

I'll sell you the TV for my new low price of $800. Also, I was planning on leaving it on a paused frame of gay porn all weekend so it would be burned into the screen, but I won't do this if you accept my offer within the next 10 minutes.

Quote:

From cory ***** to Me

ill give you $600 cash for your tv

From Me to cory *****

Sounds good! When can you come get it?

From cory ***** to Me

where do you live?

From Me to cory *****

**** *******

From cory ***** to Me

well ya i know that but like whats your address

From Me to cory *****

I'm not telling you that. Sorry, but I just don't trust people from the internet.

From cory ***** to Me

well do you want to deliver it to my place?

From Me to cory *****

And get kidnapped? I don't think so.

Here's how it is going down: We'll meet Sunday afternoon in a crowded part of town. Lets say High St, by the courthouse. I'll be walking towards Market St and you'll be walking away from it at precisely 1:00 (when the courthouse clock goes off.) Have a black suitcase ready with $600 in unmarked, non-sequential US twenty-dollar bills. I'll have a suitcase as well, and be wearing a black suit. Tell me what you plan on wearing. We will accidentally bump into each other, drop our suitcases, and pick up the other person's suitcase and continue walking. The suitcase you pick up will have a key inside it to a 1998 Ford Econoline that will be parked on Miner Street. Use the key to open the back of the van, which will have the TV inside of it. Take the TV, and leave the key in the van. You will be watched so don't try anything funny. If the suitcase does not have $600 in it, the van will be destroyed.

Does this work for you?

From cory ***** to Me

no wtf

From Me to cory *****

why not?

http://www.dontevenreply.com/view.php?post=63

hah I love that site

lmao at the last one

LOL the last one is golden

Hybrid sucks

Hybrids Suck
Posted at: 2009-06-23 09:18:12
Original ad:
if anyone wants a ride from baltimore to nyc tomorow let me know! i am driving up there sometime tomorow afternoon and would be glad to help someone out if they want to throw up some money for gas. i drive a hybrid, so i wont need much!
From Mike Partlow to *************@*********.org

Hello,

I do need a ride to New York tomorrow. That would be great. My only concern is the fact that you drive a hybrid car. I don't want to give people the idea that I care about the environment. Do you have another, more manly car that we could ride up in? I really don't want to be seen in a hybrid. I'll gladly compensate you for gas.

Mike

From christine ********* to Me

no all i have is my hybrid. what is the big deal, who cares what people think? u should be glad to help the enviroment!

From Mike Partlow to christine **********

I'm sorry Christine but it isn't the 60's anymore. People aren't a bunch of earth-saving hippies that run around and hug trees anymore. Does your car have tinted windows? I really don't want to be seen riding in that bitch-mobile. My only request is that you stop by a lake somewhere so I can dump a can of motor oil in it, to make up for all of the earth that your car will be saving. Don't worry, I'll pay for the motor oil.

Mike

From christine ********* to Me

wtf is wrong with u! im not giving u a ride ur a jerk!!!

From Mike Partlow to christine **********

Well I am sorry you won't have the privilege of riding with me. Fortunately for me, I found a better, more badass ride to NYC. I'll be sure to wave at your crappy little hybrid as we pass you in our F-350, spraying cans of aerosol out the window and throwing empty six-pack holders into the sea.

Mike

I like the first and last one, hahahahaha

too long, did not read

^cool.

edit:

but hahah fuck always forget to check his site for new shit

Quote:

Originally Posted by aznboi128 (Post 6554633)

too long, did not read

Thanx for sharing that with us.

hahaha this is good stuff.

Lol the first one is gold, and the hybrid one isn't bad

i lol'd at the last one :haha:

LOL these are hilarious

that is too much for that tv, if its a new ad... you can get a better one new for $690

;)

lol this shit is gold!

the last one is great :lol