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The thin line between love and hate
Mature discussion about understanding the opposite sex...

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Old 02-17-2010, 12:23 PM   #1
What hasn't Killed me, has made me more tolerant of RS!
 
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Triangle?

Basically, me and my buddy fell for the same girl. She knows how we feel about her, and I know she has feelings for me too and for my buddy too (at least a few weeks ago...dunno about now). It's been about a month and my buddy has been actively chasing her, but I've just been taking it slowly. My question is should I step it up a notch? What's worse is she's in HK with my friend haha. Honestly sometimes I have no idea what she's thinking...we're kind of hot and cold. All my friends tell me she's just playing around with me...what should I do?

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Old 02-17-2010, 12:43 PM   #2
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try again once more, then let it go
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Old 02-17-2010, 12:48 PM   #3
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Your buddy is in HK with her? If he doesnt seal the deal with her there yeah, give it another shot. If nothing comes of that then move on
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Old 02-17-2010, 01:49 PM   #4
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if you're buddy is in hk with this chick and hasn't done shit all, he'll hit friendzone in no time. as for you, if you're going to move slowwly on this chick you can also join your friend in friendzone.

that being said.. the girls i date are generally good girls gone bad. i'm going to assume the girls a honger, since buddy and her are in hk. i've never dated a honger and never intend to for many reasons.

exactly how are you going to step it up a notch?

she probably is playing around with you both, i mean you two just boosted her confidence like no tomorrow. but who doesn't love getting chased around?
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Old 02-17-2010, 01:51 PM   #5
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why would you want to compete with your buddy
just freaking let it go.

just be a good friend. It's funny when i was at The Town Hall eating dinner, they had a sign "he loved her most when she loved him least"

it's true. let it go, chase after another fish. there's tons.
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Old 02-17-2010, 03:24 PM   #6
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Bro Code: Article #1 - Bro's before hoe's. I know, I know, it's a stupid book, but really your friend should be thinking about your friendship too. That being said, don't be upset with him. Let it go, don't chase after this girl. If your buddy wants her that badly, let him be happy.
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Old 02-17-2010, 05:00 PM   #7
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May the best man win
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Old 02-17-2010, 05:40 PM   #8
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May the best man win
May the the man best suited for her win. Garbage usually tend to pick garbage, lets not be so harsh on the loser, they may actually be the better man. did that even fucking make sense? haha
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Old 02-17-2010, 08:34 PM   #9
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you haven't thought of the possibility that she might be interested in another guy? i suggest you not to loose a good friend and just remain friends w/ the girl so in a way its a "win win"...
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Old 02-17-2010, 10:25 PM   #10
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don't cross swords and finish it off with high fives, you both win.
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Old 02-18-2010, 12:02 AM   #11
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ever considered that its way too far to TRY to start a relationship.
If you were an item already then fine. But you have not even gotten there.
Find something locally that will work for you rather than try to get a girl that may be banging a john on the side.
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Old 02-18-2010, 02:00 AM   #12
What hasn't Killed me, has made me more tolerant of RS!
 
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shes only in hk for reading break...will be back in a week and a half. the thing is... if she liked my buddy...they would have been together already. a while ago she said she "didn't know" and i guess didnt know what she wanted.

i guess i just don't want to commit too much into this because i'm afraid of being hurt?
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Old 02-18-2010, 07:16 AM   #13
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Did you and your buddy even have a discussion about this?
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Old 02-18-2010, 08:50 AM   #14
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don't cross swords and finish it off with high fives, you both win.
LMAO best advice ever
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Old 02-18-2010, 02:55 PM   #15
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If she "doesn't know" whether she likes either of you, then she really doesn't like either of you. Just the attention that this is bringing. Either your interested in someone or your not. That or she may know the answer but doesn't want to tell either of you as that would end the extra attention. I would just let her know your around if she ever figures it out, but that your not waiting for her. go on with life. Your buddy should too.
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Old 02-22-2010, 10:03 PM   #16
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May the the man best suited for her win. Garbage usually tend to pick garbage, lets not be so harsh on the loser, they may actually be the better man. did that even fucking make sense? haha

LOL, that did made sense. nice fresh take on the cock teases of the world.
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Old 02-25-2010, 10:59 AM   #17
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Well from personal experience, talk to your buddy first. My best friend and I both liked another one of our good friends younger sisters, we held back cause of the sister part. Then my best friend found out that our friend didn't care if we dated his sister (so long as we didn't just use her or somn) then called dibs on going after her cause he found out it was safe to date her. They start going out, 10 months later he breaks up with her and tells me I can go for it if I want (I didn't even ask haha). Now I'm dating her long distance and he's dating one of her friends (didn't go so well). It's a little weird at times but for the most part it works.

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If she "doesn't know" whether she likes either of you, then she really doesn't like either of you. Just the attention that this is bringing. Either your interested in someone or your not. That or she may know the answer but doesn't want to tell either of you as that would end the extra attention. I would just let her know your around if she ever figures it out, but that your not waiting for her. go on with life. Your buddy should too.
+1 on this, sounds like she might just be attention-whoring.
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Old 02-25-2010, 08:57 PM   #18
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you're a mile behind the game.. =(
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Old 02-25-2010, 10:49 PM   #19
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as a girl, i can tell you having two guys chasing after her and boost her confidence levels so high...alot of girls have done the "i don't know" thing..and i've done it too...but its just cus girls like the feeling of having someone there, so they say "i don't know" to lead you on so you'd think there's still a chance..i'm sorry but i just don't think she's that into you
even if yes she's confused, i'm pretty sure she's not into you..sorry
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Old 02-25-2010, 11:24 PM   #20
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talk to your buddy about it, if he aint gonna hit it then you should. if you guys both get rejected, well it's better than living lifes with what ifs. just move on, plenty of fishes in the sea. take it as a life lesson, not to boost a girls confidence that much.

girls do know, if they say they don't know. they're just stalling and keeping you on the leash. pretty much just an option...

should just let her return back to vancouver and not talk to her at all for a month, and give her a surprise call/text after. again if it fails, move on. simple enough right?

but i mean, if a girl is playing you like this why would you want to date her right? but one night stand is an alternative option.
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Old 02-25-2010, 11:35 PM   #21
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Let your friend take the grenade lol. It's going to blow up on either of your faces anyways. Think about it: do you really want to go for a girl that likes both you and your buddy? When she's hot and cold to you, it means that she wants you to impress her...... totally not worth it on your part.
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Old 02-26-2010, 12:27 PM   #22
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Old 02-27-2010, 02:50 AM   #23
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To make a decision here, you have to use game theory. You and your buddy have two choices - to screw each other over or to work together in mutual cooperation. The adversary in this case is the girl.

Let's look at the three possible scenarios

a) Screw each other over
To do this will weaken your friendship and allow the girl to play you two off each other. Because she knows that you are both pursuing her, this gives her the upper hand in decision making which allows her to call the shots.

b) One tries to cooperate while the other screws the other over
In this case, one person will look really good, while the other will get screwed (and not in the way normal heterosexual people like to get screwed). The girl again gets the upper hand and a friendship might be lost.

c) Cooperate
Pretend for a moment here that you two are the only viable options that the girl has (for sake of simplicity). Let's say also for the sake of argument that you have a service that she wants (care, attention, etc). If you two choose to cooperate in an oligopolic-like market, then she will have no choice but to accept whatever price you and your buddy set. What this means for you two?

A obvious answer is a threesome.

After that, you guys can dump the silly girl and find yourselves way better girls who don't play games.
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Old 02-27-2010, 09:09 AM   #24
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A obvious answer is a threesome.

After that, you guys can dump the silly girl and find yourselves way better girls who don't play games.
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