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The thin line between love and hate
Mature discussion about understanding the opposite sex...

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Old 09-15-2010, 04:18 PM   #1
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girl problem ):

so recently i hung out with a girl i like.
it was really awkward, she knows that i like her so we didnt say much that day.
we spoke like 2-3 sentences every 2-3 minute.. she kept texting and i didnt know what to do. so 45 minutes later we went to aberdeen and she bumped into her friends. (we go to different schools) then we joined them and after about 10 minutes i left. our msn/text messages are pretty awkward right now.. those one sentence conversations. what can i do right now? should i just give up on her and move on or continue to try?
hope you can give me some advice guys, this happened on sunday and i still feel miserable

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Old 09-15-2010, 04:19 PM   #2
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she has a female bestfriend? hit on her
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Old 09-15-2010, 04:20 PM   #3
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sounds like you're giving up before even really trying.
spill your guts and if she turns you down then at least you tried.
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Old 09-15-2010, 04:21 PM   #4
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I've always been under the impression that if a girl is interested in you she'll show it.
From what you said it doesnt really seem like it...
I'd honestly just forget about it
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Old 09-15-2010, 04:26 PM   #5
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She's just not that into you.

Sorry.
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Old 09-15-2010, 05:05 PM   #6
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Go on a couple more dates but if it stays awkward and the fireworks aren't there, move on.

Although when you're young it's a bit different. Go on another date and tell her you like her and ask if she feels the same. Be ready for the worst though! GL!
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Old 09-15-2010, 06:53 PM   #7
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Have u done ur homework and research on what she likes? Did u try to make jokes to lighten the mood? If not, try them next time.

This girl is human too. Her shit still stinks. Think aboutthat next time u go out with her.
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Old 09-15-2010, 06:54 PM   #8
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I am in the exact same situation as you, except it's been a while since she found out I like her and since then she kind of forgot about it and that's fine by me, but I think what you need to do now is start acting aloof, act like you don't care, or act like since she is being cold to you, you be colder to her. I know it's hard sometimes, sometimes you might want to just say fuck it and want to spill your feelings. I don't know if that will necessarily work for you since every girl is different, but you can try and please report back because I want to know what happens, heheh. Good luck! C(:
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Old 09-15-2010, 07:00 PM   #9
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i dont know, perhaps just ask her if she wants to be your gf?, instead of behaving like a beta

if she saids yes then good for u, if no then just move on and be friends like 2 adults
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Old 09-15-2010, 07:03 PM   #10
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she has a female bestfriend? hit on her
buahahaha
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sounds like you're giving up before even really trying.
spill your guts and if she turns you down then at least you tried.
nawh in the past ive fallen quite deep and everytime i broke up i get quite moody so i learned to drop things before i get too deep aha
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I've always been under the impression that if a girl is interested in you she'll show it.
From what you said it doesnt really seem like it...
I'd honestly just forget about it
i thought about that too but girls these days LOL but thanks for the advice
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Go on a couple more dates but if it stays awkward and the fireworks aren't there, move on.

Although when you're young it's a bit different. Go on another date and tell her you like her and ask if she feels the same. Be ready for the worst though! GL!
thanks for the advice yeah im still in my teens aha
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Have u done ur homework and research on what she likes? Did u try to make jokes to lighten the mood? If not, try them next time.

This girl is human too. Her shit still stinks. Think aboutthat next time u go out with her.
yup i even bought her her favourite flavour of bbt before we met up ! thanks for the advice !
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I am in the exact same situation as you, except it's been a while since she found out I like her and since then she kind of forgot about it and that's fine by me, but I think what you need to do now is start acting aloof, act like you don't care, or act like since she is being cold to you, you be colder to her. I know it's hard sometimes, sometimes you might want to just say fuck it and want to spill your feelings. I don't know if that will necessarily work for you since every girl is different, but you can try and please report back because I want to know what happens, heheh. Good luck! C(:
thanks for the advice best of luck goes to you as well
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Old 09-15-2010, 08:41 PM   #11
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Buying the bubbletea was a mistake, and it didn't help you at all.

Since you screwed up, wait a month and give it another shot. Within the month cut all communication with her. No texting her when you get the chance, no stupid long hour phone calls. Then on your date, keep it light and funny. If she forgets who you are after a month or bails on the date, then she was never interested in the beginning.

Honestly, I bet you're going to have no self control and text her. Then again it's expected since your a teen, I guess.
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Old 09-15-2010, 10:04 PM   #12
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^ thanks ! ill try it
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Old 09-15-2010, 10:16 PM   #13
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Ugh was just out with this girl too and I KNOW she likes me. She suggests we go get some coffee, we do, but its like she just can't hold a conversation. Ridiculous. I don't know if shes just shy or what her problem is.. :/ Reminds me of this one time I went out to this desert place with ex and the couple beside us was just sitting there... not really talking... awkward.
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Old 09-15-2010, 10:18 PM   #14
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sorry had to

don't go out and be like will you be my gf, thats just setting you up for failure/heartbreak get to know her more on a personal level, and if shes not willing to open up then unfortunately shes not the right one, and probably doesnt feel the same way...and v.Rossi's right dont keep on texting her, let her think and give her space, you do not want to seem desperate and obsessed

Good Luck
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Old 09-15-2010, 10:18 PM   #15
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She's just not that into you.

Sorry.
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Old 09-15-2010, 11:29 PM   #16
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go out for some drinks and when int he car start making out with her.

If she doesn't stop you then is all good. If she refuse blame it on the alcholo.
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Old 09-16-2010, 10:34 AM   #17
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just don't put the key in the ignition, but make sure you park your car in her garage.

but really reading your original post again... i say give it up. if it's awkward from the get-go it probably won't work. i mean body language is important, if she's texting then she's really not stoked for this date. should've shown confidence and said "feels like i'm being a third wheel to you and your date, your crackberry. how about this? let me just drop you off" shows your not desperate and not there for her amusement.

group dates are a big no. you shouldn't go on group dates until youve had at least 10 dates in. this is crucial information for your future dates.

one sentence conversations... sounds like real in depth conversations going on between you two. do you guys really have anything in common? by the information you gave, it seems you guys don't click/compatible. do you like her just for her looks? because there's millions of girls out there that will always look better and i'm sure you'll be able to have a decent conversation with one of them. but if you do like her for her looks, get her drunk go to your place and watch a 'movie'.

of course, it might not be her and might be you. how you walk, what you wear, your tone of voice, your social skills. i think she's just one of those girls that are too nice to say "no" to your date, but just because she's on this date it doesn't mean her interest in you has gone up any higher.

remember if she doesn't want to be with you, then don't try and be with her. it just doesn't make sense.

edit: don't tell her you like her, bite the tongue! i mean your damn actions already show it. girls know this shit, you're always being tested so you always gotta be on top of your game.
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Old 09-16-2010, 11:19 AM   #18
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go out for some drinks and when int he car start making out with her.

If she doesn't stop you then is all good. If she refuse blame it on the alcohol.
AHAHAH, this works too!
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Old 09-16-2010, 03:45 PM   #19
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I say go out with some mutual friends. Always helps breaks the awkward silences. If that doesnt help then forget about her. Plenty of fish in the sea. Or ocean.
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Old 09-16-2010, 04:17 PM   #20
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You're a teenager? Do you have a job? If not what you need to do is get out there and get a retail sales job in a mall, somewhere where you make commission. This is important because you have to be under pressure to hone your selling (and thus social) skills. These jobs are soul killing, I know but they are also a fantastic machine for taking shy awkward kids and turning them into comfortable and confident extroverts.

And comfortable and confident teenage guys? They're rare. They get chicks.

If you're having one of those conversations that's mostly "Yeahhh" long pause "I know... right" Long pause while she texts her friend who's more interesting then you are cause she is actually participating in that conversation with her while you're standing right there "Oh okay" ... then she's not that into you.

And you're not doing anything to engage her or captivate her attention. You need to get comfortable with yourself, be able to look a girl in the eyes while you're talking to her and not blush when you do it. You need to learn to ask the right questions, draw someone in, not just hold but demand their attention (without being pushy). You need to learn to direct and sustain a conversation. You need to learn to walk up to someone regardless of how nervous or uneasy you feel and say 'Hey. We have X, Y & Z in common. Wanna go get some coffee and talk about them?'

Seriously. High pressure, commission based Retail sales. It will give you a playground to learn all these things and give you some money to take the next chick that comes along out. It'll just cost you a bit of your soul... but you're young you have it to spare. :P
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Old 09-16-2010, 04:28 PM   #21
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thanks for all the advice ppl, i would thank you if i didnt run out of thanks aha
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Old 09-16-2010, 05:39 PM   #22
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uhh, just talk to her dude. girls like confidence. if ur sitting back and waiting for it to happen by itself, u'll be waiting forever.

or next time, since she already knows u like her, just plant a big ol wet kiss on her and if she kisses back, ur golden... if she says "eww, what the fuck do you think ur doing", then its time to move on.

either way, you HAVE TO MAKE A MOVE
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Old 09-16-2010, 05:49 PM   #23
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Confidence my friend, is the key. Chicks dig it. Humor too. That's all I needed 8)
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Old 09-16-2010, 05:56 PM   #24
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Seriously. High pressure, commission based Retail sales. It will give you a playground to learn all these things
^
THIS

It's not going to turn an introvert into an extrovert. But it'll give a shy boy a fighting chance.

Having a job that forces you to talk to random stranger, puts you in a situation where you are forced to learn to make small talk. You're not going to make a sale with awkward silence.
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Old 09-16-2010, 05:59 PM   #25
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sorry had to

don't go out and be like will you be my gf, thats just setting you up for failure/heartbreak get to know her more on a personal level, and if shes not willing to open up then unfortunately shes not the right one, and probably doesnt feel the same way...and v.Rossi's right dont keep on texting her, let her think and give her space, you do not want to seem desperate and obsessed

Good Luck

damn you beat me to it. propz
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