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The thin line between love and hate
Mature discussion about understanding the opposite sex...

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Old 10-24-2010, 08:31 PM   #1
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What should i do =O

So i like this girl and my bestfriend knows her. She has never talked to me. She knows who i am though.

EDIT:: Im a very shy person around people i dont talk to often. If i know the Person im not shy around them.


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Old 10-24-2010, 08:32 PM   #2
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First thing you do is PM me her facebook page. And from there, I will guide you.
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Old 10-24-2010, 08:33 PM   #3
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you can start by talking to her. Let her know you're not a creep?
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Old 10-24-2010, 08:33 PM   #4
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Ask and treat her to lunch at your high school's cafeteria.
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Old 10-24-2010, 08:42 PM   #5
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What could i talk to her about.
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Old 10-24-2010, 08:48 PM   #6
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just start off with a simple "hey hows it goin" when you see her next time, keep things simple, and remember it takes time. You can't just jump in there right away, and hey maybe once you get to know her a little more and talk, your viewpoint of her may change, especially since you say you haven't talked to her before so im guessing this is a physical attraction and there may not be much of a mental attraction yet.

But ill let V.Rossi chime in here since hes the RS relationship specialist

Good Luck

ps. keep it simple
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Old 10-24-2010, 10:13 PM   #7
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Ask and treat her to lunch at your high school's cafeteria.
i wouldn't do that.
"hey do you wanna eat lunch together? i'll buy you a cheeseburger.."
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Old 10-24-2010, 10:25 PM   #8
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i wouldn't do that.
"hey do you wanna eat lunch together? you'll buy me a cheeseburger.."
let her know whos boss from the start
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Old 10-24-2010, 10:42 PM   #9
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let her know whos boss from the start
that only works when they already know each other or she likes him
in this scenario, she doesn't even know who he is. she's just gonna be like bitchhhh
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Old 10-24-2010, 11:15 PM   #10
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She knows who i am, we just never talk she is also close with most my friends.
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Old 10-25-2010, 12:26 AM   #11
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So i like this girl and my bestfriend knows her. She has never talked to me. She knows who i am though.

EDIT:: Im a very shy person around people i dont talk to often.
she has never talked to you before, but you like her? do you like girls this easily? how many dates before you fall in love romeo? 5? 7? after she shows you her pearly white smile? for all you know she could be a serial killer after her regular 9 to 5. you don't like her.. you don't even know her, you simply find her very attractive.

this isn't rocket science, you like her... simply say "hi, how's it going?" how else do you meet people? i don't care if you're shy, we all get that talking to a beautiful 9 or a 10. it's fine, but don't show signs of weakness. breathe, suck it up, head up high, back straight. "hi, ..."

that is the easy, smart, right thing to do... you know this, i know this. stop overthinking it... why the hesitation? fear of rejection? man up and overcome your fears. rejection is going to happen down the road anyways, and "what if's" are a complete mind fuck.

think optimistically, how proud would you feel if she became your girlfriend? this beautiful girl standing beside you on your dates is yours because of what you did! Sell yourself to her, and do a damn good job for your sake and pride.

just make small talk and close the deal(get the #) after a few minutes of talking, if you don't do it on the first couple encounters then you'll be in a sad place called friendzone. it's a mix of hell and blue balls, and instead of satan it's the beautiful girl you like. who knows, maybe she might not even be compatible with you and your stressing over nothing, again you don't know her at all. zero, zinch, nada.

pretend you're a salesmen, you can present the best presentation in the world, but it would mean nothing if you don't close the deal. ABC - Always be closing. give off a cocky yet funny persona, but not overkill. always keep it light and funny. can you do that mr. shy?

remember losers are losers because they don't know how to - or won't - close.

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But ill let V.Rossi chime in here since hes the RS relationship specialist
haha cooool
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Old 10-25-2010, 12:30 AM   #12
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btw, if she's close with most of your friends. i don't know how that'll work out, really depends whether your friends have a big mouth and whether they like her to or not. life ain't no disney movie, survival of the fittest.
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Old 10-25-2010, 10:52 AM   #13
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^ sums up this thread !
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Old 10-25-2010, 12:14 PM   #14
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you dont know if you actually really like her until you become friends....
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Old 10-25-2010, 01:08 PM   #15
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you dont know if you actually really like her until you become friends....
The problem is that you BECOME FRIENDS, there's a difference between girlfriend and girl friend.
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Old 10-25-2010, 03:15 PM   #16
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^ word. btw there's no "thanks" button for you. why, too good for it? haha

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you dont know if you actually really like her until you become friends....
i'm sure you can know whether you like a girl after 3 dates. at least you'll know whether you still wish to pursue or not.

it's after 60 dates when the real colors start to show.
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Old 10-25-2010, 07:09 PM   #17
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Funny enough, I'm in pretty much the exact same situation. Except being "shy" isn't holding me back. It's the fact that I really just need a good opportunity to talk to her one-on-one and shit. I went out of my way to go up to her to introduce myself, but that's pretty much it. The fact that she's in a different circle of friends makes it hard for me to even be at the same place with her.

This is what I would suggest:

As your best friend for a hook-up! That's what I did (It's currently pending for my situation though). Ask him/her to invite you to a get-together that involves both your friend and that particular girl. In that way, you can establish yourself within their circle, get more comfortable around her, and start to converse with her.

Once you've gotten a little bit more acquainted with her, wait a couple of days then send her a friend request on facebook (if she hasn't already sent you one). Honestly, I find messaging or adding up someone you like (or anyone for that matter) prior to getting even a bit acquainted with that person to be a little stalker-ish. It's more likely to backfire on you rather than working wonders.

Get comfortable with her. Post something clever on her wall that involves like an inside joke that you or the group shared that night you guys hung out. Have a long conversation with your wall-to-wall or something. Nowadays, this is some of the shit that's pretty much vital due to how much technology has evolved and seeped into our lives. Be thankful for that coz "shy guys" like you can benefit from this. Just remember, avoid looking or sounding creepy or clingy in any way. Play it cool bro.

After that you can work your way to getting her MSN. Chat it up. Eventually, you'll have her on your contact list on your cellphone. Converse. Keep her company! LISTEN to what she says and remember them. Be suave. Make it obvious that you're interested. You'll know early on (if you can decently read people) if she's either interested or NOT at all. Although girls are pretty fucking complicated specimens, so I wouldn't blame you if you misread. Almost every guy in the world has had at least one bad read in their lifetime. Haha

Ask her out if all goes well. Again, be smooth. This is when all the technological, somewhat pseudo bullshit ends and you enter the "real world" phase. Take her out on a date, impress her but be yourself and hopefully you'll get the girl.

As corny as most of these steps may sound, it's an approach that "shy guys" can work with. I can honestly say I actually ended up dating a girl doing the whole "facebook wall-to-wall---> MSN ---> text marathons ---> ask out--> actual date ---> relationship" method. Which should be a pretty common one I might add.

Otherwise, just skip everything and man up. Just talk to her! Go out of your way and do something. Girls like that because it's becoming less and less common for just a straight up personal "can I have your number?" thing. If you wait too long, she might end up being unavailable and taken. You wouldn't want that. The regret is more painful sitting around doing nothing rather than doing something and being shot down. Life is shit my friend, but sometimes you can luck out and get rewarded big time

Good luck OP
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Paying for sex? Isn't that was dating is? :trollface.jpg:
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my rule of thumb when picking between 2 or more girls .. always go with the one with bigger boobs
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Old 10-25-2010, 09:46 PM   #18
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That's another problem, =/ She hangs out with her own group of friends. But im decent friends with 35% of them.
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Old 10-25-2010, 11:13 PM   #19
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^ it doesn't matter!! that's an absolute shit excuse. are you going to go out on a date with these other friends of hers as well, are you paying for all the 35% of them including her? who cares about them?

if she's with her friends: (brackets are just my inner thoughts lol)
*with confidence, clean shirt of course.

-hey could i borrow you for a quick sec? (move you know 7 - 8 steps away, therefore she sees her friends and isn't creeped the fuck out still comfortable, plus her friend is probably on bitch patrol and seeing if she's alright, just ready to cockblock)
-hey so your (the girl i'm afraid to talk to and keep finding excuses to name), how's it going?
*make small talk (don't wet your pants op)
-anyways, i just wanted to ask if you wanted to grab a bite or a drink sometime?
-awesome, how about you give me your number and i'll give you a call? (not: can you give me, or please give me, or will you give me? don't set a time, leave em guessing)

call her 7 days later

if she's by herself:

-hi, hows it going?
-so you're a friend of (your bestfriend's name) huh? (makes her slightly comfortable, that you guys have a mutual friend i guess? breaks the barrier, somewhat. plus ice breaker)
-that's cool, how did you guys meet? (just because, open ended questions you know)
-really? i wouldn't expect that. (i really don't care how, change the subject enough talking about him. leave all the other guys aside. next subject)
-so hows life? what do you do? (it'll be me, in about 3 weeks heh )
-really?
-hey looks like your friends are coming, it was nice talking to you could i get your number? maybe we can do something together sometimes? "no" then you can go cry, chances are it'll be a sure or a yes, but read her response. is there any hesitation or is she delighted to? little details.
-see u around (smile)

i would have done something different since this sounds wayyy too generic and nice of me for my liking but i have no response/girl. so this will have to do for you anyways, rook

remember like an interview you're trying to please them, so eye contact is crucial. smile, read her body language.

not the greatest script, completely improvised but whatever it works. get that number, don't come back till you do. once you have that number, her friends are goneeeeeee adios. they can't hear what you and her say over the phone. then it doesn't matter whether you're good with the 35% or hated by them all, who cares? you have her full undivided attention. don't fuck it up.
don't text, seriously don't.

if you're one of those hongers that hang out in large groups, then yeah this isn't going to work like at all. honestly, i don't know how to work around them, nor do i want too. maybe because i'm westernized? idk w/e, i rather sleep with something with a couple more pounds anyways and english only for me.
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Old 10-26-2010, 12:10 AM   #20
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Seriously dude, take v.Rossi and palepilsenpin0y advice. They've hit the nail on the head like 100 times. There's really no other advice anyone else can give you.

I was in your situation before and I did almost did exactly what they both said. We were both really shy and we both had the same mutual friends. A few of my friends were also friends with her too. We never really spoke to each other because I was shy and I didn't know what to say. We had the same classes and stuff so I would sometimes ask her for "help" but that never really worked. The conversations just ended after she gave me the answer.

Eventually I said screw it and I'm just going to talker to her. So I just msgd her one day "hey how are you?" and then it just flowed from there. We ended up talking for like 4 hours and it was the first time I ever slept past my bed time LOL. I was still kind of shy so I had problems pressing Enter on the keyboard because I was scared that the conversation would be so awkward. It was never was awkward and we eventually got to learn a lot about each other.

We still kind of had problems talking to each other in real life since we were both really shy but we just eventually grew out of it. We both bussed in the same direction so I would bus her home. This kept going for a few weeks until eventually she told me that she liked me! I was kind of surprised that she said it and I told her I liked her too!

The rest is history!

Honestly, man up and either say hey to her in real life or on msn. I wouldn't do it over facebook well cause its facebook. A simple hey hows it going could spark an amazing conversation and you'll find out a lot more about her. I don't think it'd be pretty weird if you just msgd her on msn since you do have mutual friends. Leave the conversation on msn open ended so you can approach her the next day and pick it up from there.

Hopefully this kind of gives you a little more insight! Even though v.Rossi and palepislenpin0y pretty much said everything!

Good luck!
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Old 10-26-2010, 03:19 AM   #21
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The more questions you ask a girl, the more interested you seem in her.

...just don't interrogate her. ask 5 or so questions for every piece of info you offer about yourself. Be confident, and be chill.
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Old 10-26-2010, 08:58 AM   #22
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V. Rossi talks like someone from The Game... Kinda reminds me of ross jeffries, i respect dat shit
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Old 10-26-2010, 08:58 AM   #23
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Old 10-26-2010, 04:23 PM   #24
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haha i am who i am today really from: Doc's Love "The System" http://www.askmen.com/products/doclove/index.html

David DeAngelo is alright he isn't as blunt as Doc Love so this is why i like him best. you can learn some shit off his weekly articles, in addition askmen has lots of hot girls all around their site. pretty much an online magazine for men.

the man who taught me all i know, that high comfort level does not mean high interest level, that woman don't lie men just don't listen.

it's also a fact, that if you want to get better teach others. so i'm here helping you saps. i also read with an open mind different opinions and point of views on revsscene, because sometimes i'm too much of an asshole for my own good without realizing. in addition, i've always had a thing for sociology study of human behaviours... so yeah.
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Old 10-26-2010, 05:39 PM   #25
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^ Shit $99? Well if it made you the boss you are today, then I guess it's money well-spent. Haha
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