Sharing Best Practices (relationships)
 

With all the stuff on here about problems and helping others, I thought it would be nice to share what works in your relationships and to share those best practices.

And example would be:

"Don't go to bed angry" and then some details such as "We make an agreement to discuss and talk about everything and resolve things before we go to sleep. Even if we're tired we stay up solving the issue because the relationship is that important.


I don't mind sharing one to start off with.

I personally believe in not saying anything hurtful to the other person in an argument. It is so hard to do this but once you say something, you can never unsay those words again and it can come back and bite you. If I am really mad or upset, I just explain the reality of things:

"I'm really upset right now and I don't want to make matters worse. I need about an hour or so to cool off and I will address this situation when I can think rationally and without hurting you. Is that okay?"

Of course the other party needs to be aware of what needs to happen and of course the 1 hour rule can't turn into a day or anything like that.

I find for me, it has worked well and enabled me to really get to the root of the problem and talk things out like adults. Often once I've had some time to think, I calm down and it's not a big deal anymore.

i make sure my hands don't have any calluses on them. it's a pretty good relationship if you ask me.

:okay: :alone:

If the person you are dating is a long term partner and you see yourself being with them for life. I suggest telling them the one thing you don't want anyone to find out (IE financial issue). Something you feel really unconfortable talking to anyone about.

For me is my financial. I have a pretty bad past and is something I wouldn't want anyone to know. Is something I will tell my partner. Is something I am ashamed of..... a big mistake I made in the past.

Oooh, this is a hard one especially if you have something that needs to be buried.

cant tell if this is a joe 45 thread but ill bite

I dont always get into fights with the mrs but when I do I dont back down. I usually offer to talk out a problem but she usually goes into silent mode. I acknowledge her behavior then I play along. She loses all the time.

Full disclosure

communicate as if today was the last time you will see them.
listen to what they say and request they dont hint (if you are not good at taking hints)
apologize and mean it not just to shut them up
be the bigger man/woman and dont bring past issues into the present
when the issue is being resolved do something to make them smile - it'll be resolved quicker.

Whenever we get into an argument about something, I won't say anything hurtful to her, ie. calling her a bitch/cunt/asshole...etc.
there's many other words and ways i can say it to basically say the same thing, but not as hurtful. At the end when it's starting to cool down (arguments only last 2-5 minutes with us) ill usually make her smile.

Ex. Me - "your such a tard...:p"
Her - "me?? Your the tard...."
Me - "yeah...maybe...but I'm your tard :p"

Saying it as playful as I can to make her smile. Just an easy way for us to both realize we're bickering about something stupid and its now in the past.
Posted via RS Mobile

True! Never say anything hurtful when you can't think clearly. I used to say the stupidest things when I argue with ppl. Now I just remain chill and try to think that it is not the person I am angry at but at what is happening. This usually helps cool me down.

Could be since I work in customer service now I have to be polite event though the other end is swearing and yelling.

This is a big one for me...

Don't hold grudges.

After you talk/fight about an issue and it's been resolved, let it go, drop it and never bring it up again in future fights.......


I tend to hold grudges and punish people slowly over time.

always be truthful... i hate it when girls say theres nothing wrong when shes clearly angry... shit always bite u in the end

the full stop in the "nothing." text means something is up.

Always be protective of her, always. She'll start to change her mind about you if you're not. (not always physical, emotional too.)

Always calm down before you say anything you'll regret.

Your money eventually becomes her money too. (if you're in a serious relationship) so just get over it. When she has money she'll buy things for you too.

Even if a girl comes into your life just to be friends, keep your distance. Getting too close could lead to something more.