[CONFIDENTIAL] New girl at boyfriend’s workplace – Should I be worried?

[TheKingdom2000]

Most guys are not honest. Especially when it comes to situations like these ones. I'm not saying he's going to get with her or anything, but if he thinks she's good looking he probably won't flat out say it. I mean he know's you don't want to hear it so he doesn't say it.

and you are NOT being insecure or whatever. So if anyone tells you different tell them to FUCK OFF because they've obviously never been in a relationship. I don't care if you've been in a relationship for 1month or 10 years. Most people still get jealous. It is a natural reaction. That doesn't make you a bad person or insecure or whatever. It's perfectly legitimate.

Chances are your boyfriend probably thinks this new girl is decent and would probably stick it in her. That is just how guys think. And no, he won't drop the, "i have a gf" line if he's a typical guy. Just because he would stick it in her doesn't mean he'll cheat on you. That is just what he is thinking.

If you trust your man then let it be. That is the only thing you can do. I know it's hard because i've been in your situation before. Sometimes you just gotta trust them. Eventually, he'll drop the gf line. Or better yet, the new girl will drop the, "i have a bf line". Girls seem to drop the significant other in convos more often then guys for sure (provided she has a bf).

[stewie]

hmmm my past experiences, when a friend brings out a new girl to hang out with us or something...or where were somewhere where theres girls around, if im in a relationship with a girl and shes not there, i wont tell the girl im talking to that im taken. do i have any intentions on trying to hook up with this random girl? absolutely not! so why dont i tell her? cause of the way i talk, sure it may be flirty and dirty, but thats just the way i talk. when a girl finds out i have a gf and then listens to the way i talk to them (im not serious when i talk to women..everything is one big joke to me saying shit like "watch it or its goin in your pooper woman!" just random shit) they just think im a jackass for trying to hook up with them....but like i said, i have no intentions of hooking up with them...im simply doing it because its just what i do..its completely harmless, and i find it fun.

but if your really scared about this new girl, tell me where she works and ill just go there and hit on her and try to sleep with her instead! ill take one for the team so your bf cant!

[rsx]

$10 says the couple is under 22. Another $10 says the girl doesn't approve her bf watching porn.

There are lots of pretty girls/guys out there, same thing's going to happen to you once you get into the workforce, so you better start getting used to "trusting" your bf.

[FerrariEnzo]

the question is has he ever been like this before where theres a new worker thats a looker? has he ever cheat either with you or with an ex?

[91LS-VTak]

Do you expect your bf not to talk to his new coworker? Seriously...You do know that most people see their coworkers more than friends or family, right?

[TheNewGirl]

Originally Posted by !Yaminashi

What if your husband/wife is making excuses to be able to spend time with their "crush"?
Not necessarily to talk about anything specific, just to hang out and spend more time with them. Crossing the line?

I would first question if they know what they are doing. If they're deliberately lying that's over the line in my books.

[spoon.ek9]

rather than spend time worrying, why don't you put that effort into guaranteeing your bf stays yours? it's well known that guys are usually thinking about one thing. if you satisfy that one thing, then there's really not much reason to pursue it elsewhere. i mean, unless he's a sex addict with little to no self-control, you really have nothing to worry about.

i have to disagree with mx703 saying jealousy is acceptable behaviour. to a certain extent, yes, everyone will be a little jealous but giving in to this emotion only screws things up. it's been said before but if you don't trust someone after 5 yrs (regardless of your age) then there must be a reason for it. either he's cheated before or it's your own insecurity. if it's the latter, then you really need to do some thinking about what kind of person you are and perhaps how to improve yourself. having a partner who is an insecure, jealous mess is completely annoying, stressful and perhaps one of the fastest ways of destroying a relationship.

[PJ]

Originally Posted by spoon.ek9

it's well known that guys are usually thinking about one thing. if you satisfy that one thing, then there's really not much reason to pursue it elsewhere. i mean, unless he's a sex addict with little to no self-control, you really have nothing to worry about.

i have to disagree with mx703 saying jealousy is acceptable behaviour.

I can speak upon knowing first hand of your boyfriend's situation. Most guys will always have wandering minds. I don't want to say ALL guys, but hell, I know I'm not that one in a million. I am completely guilty of this, but I can say that I've never let myself act upon these thoughts.

That new girl is just giving him the high of something new and different. The way he reacts to these feelings is completely up to him. That's where you have to really test your trust. The feelings themselves, however are completely natural. Excuse the blunt example, but it goes for almost anything. If you've had the same car for X amount of years, and you see a new shiny different one, it's natural for you to be attracted to that new one. If your current "car" could have feelings, jealousy is inevitable.

Whatever he feels is completely on the outside. He's known you for 5+ years, and he's known her for what, a month? So there's no way that he can be attracted to her for her personality. It's just the high of that new and different feeling. Being attracted to looks is completely natural too. What, I think Megan Fox is hot. Is that wrong? As humans, we can't control what we're attracted to.

I wouldn't worry too much about it. It's normal for you to be bothered by this. But being together for 5 years, you just have to trust him. And honestly in the end, if he does end up cheating, Do you really wanna be with someone like that anyway?

[nabs]

Originally Posted by TheNewGirl

You've been together 5 years. Either you trust him or you don't. I think at this point in your relationship you should know.

/thread

[gdoh]

updates??

[guddagudd]

Maybe OP found out she's just over-thinking/over-complicating things, and just decided to trust her boyfriend. I know I often over-think things.