ROMANCE MATHEMATICS
 

ROMANCE MATHEMATICS

Smart man + smart woman = romance

Smart man + dumb woman = affair

Dumb man + smart woman = marriage

Dumb man + dumb woman = pregnancy

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OFFICE ARITHMETIC

Smart boss + smart employee = profit

Smart boss + dumb employee = production

Dumb boss + smart employee = promotion

Dumb boss + dumb employee = overtime

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SHOPPING MATH

A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs.

A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn't need.

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GENERAL EQUATIONS & STATISTICS

A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.

A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.

A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.

A successful woman is one who can find such a man.

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HAPPINESS

To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a little.

To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot and not try to understand her at all.

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LONGEVITY

Married men live longer than single men, but married men are a lot more willing to die.

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MEMORY

Any married man should forget his mistakes, there's no use in two people remembering the same thing.

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APPEARANCE

Men wake up as good-looking as they went to bed. Women somehow deteriorate during the night.

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PROPENSITY TO CHANGE

A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't.

A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, and she does.

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DISCUSSION TECHNIQUE

A woman has the last word in any argument. Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.

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COMPREHENSION

There are 2 times when a man doesn't understand a woman - before marriage and after marriage.

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HOW TO STOP PEOPLE FROM BUGGING YOU ABOUT GETTING MARRIED:

Old aunts used to come up to me at weddings, poking me in the ribs and cackling, telling me, "You're next."

They stopped after I started doing the same thing to them at funerals.

This stuff is so true..good read!

LOL nice find

love the very last one!
Your next ;)

This is hilarious. :haha: And it is all true.

LOL omg the last one. I gotta try that at some point. my relatives are making me go crazy with the "omg la~ do you have a bf? when you getting married la~? you need to marry soon. not so young anymore!"

crazy aunties >.<

nice

BAHAHHAHAHA
fuck
goood shit
a little biased
but i like it none the less

lol :haha:

Old, but still good nevertheless =D

To the poster below

You'r next

hehehe, men wake up looking as good as they went to bed...women deteriorate during the night

LOL!!!:haha:

hahaha...good read

hahaha TRUE TRUE

ROFL. great stuff.

APPEARANCE

Men wake up as good-looking as they went to bed. Women somehow deteriorate during the night.

lol

Haha. Thats rich =)

this is gold

You guys forgot this.
http://www.midcoast.com/~mlc/ice/girls-evil.jpg

gold!

"APPEARANCE

Men wake up as good-looking as they went to bed. Women somehow deteriorate during the night."

lmao
we dont deteriorate. we just have long hair (or at least, most girls do) and so when we wake up we sorta sometimes look like the girl from the grudge.. it cant be helped =/

^ i think this is more in reference to the women who wear make up, and waking up next to a girl with no make up on.

omg classic!

i love the last one too...and every other one is tru too tru...

A copy of this is going into my "valentine gift" :D... I wonder if I should wear a bulletproof vest?!?!