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Relationship & Gender Discussion THIS SPACE OPEN FOR ADVERTISEMENT. YOU SHOULD BE ADVERTISING HERE!
The thin line between love and hate
Mature discussion about understanding the opposite sex...

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Old 03-23-2009, 12:21 AM   #1
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soon to be long distance relationship

so...
in a month, me and my girlfriend will be in a long distance relationship as im moving back to vancouver and my gf is in a town near kelowna
on april 1st, we would've had our 5th month anniversary
shes a virgin...... ive tried, talked to her about it, and we're taking steps as i have to break thorugh a religious barrier

i was looking at another thread about ldrs and i am reallky, really afraid that i'll cheat. especially when i have someone as good as her, and espeiclaly since shes a virign and i havent fucked her yet.... i mean if i wnated to cheat, i wouldve cheated by now because i havent fucked her... so im afraid

she'll be up here once or twice over the span of 4 months
and i'll go down to visit her twice over the span of 4 months as well.....

i know ill keep in constant contact with her, texting her at least everyday, calling her most days out of the week, i did this for a month when i came back up here as well....

now my question is...
how do you think a girl like that would react if i asked if she wanted to be on a break? and i know shes not stupid so shes obviously going to see that i just want some pussy and be able to see other ppl during this 4 month period..
what suggestions do you guys have?
i'll be back down there in september for school and we'll be together again.. but thats in september... and i'll be back home in may

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Old 03-23-2009, 10:18 AM   #2
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Oooh! Can I add another related question?

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Originally Posted by fnguyen96 View Post
i know ill keep in constant contact with her, texting her at least everyday, calling her most days out of the week, i did this for a month when i came back up here as well....
For people who do LDR's. What do you guys do when you guys run out of things to talk about? Or if the conversations are the same questions and asnwers over and over (ie. How was your day, how was work, etc./It was fine, not bad, etc.) Do LDR's still work past this point?
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Old 03-23-2009, 12:47 PM   #3
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you talk to them as you would to your gf/bf if they were living here.
find things to do together over the webcam. like have "dates." sometimes we watch shows together, or eat certain things at the same time so it's like we're there with each other. you have to get creative for sure.

asking for a break/open relationship when it's only going to be 4 months being apart seems like you won't be able to handle what a LDR will require from you. plus, if you've waited this long what's the hurt in waiting another 4months ? she's a virgin, she's not going to give it up to you unless she's willing and ready for it so that's another waiting game all in itself.

if wanting to fuck her (or doing it in general) is more important than continuing a good relationship (despite the zero sexual intimacy) then you have to ask yourself if you're really in it for some ass or actually her?
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Old 03-23-2009, 06:49 PM   #4
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For people who do LDR's. What do you guys do when you guys run out of things to talk about? Or if the conversations are the same questions and asnwers over and over (ie. How was your day, how was work, etc./It was fine, not bad, etc.) Do LDR's still work past this point?

I find that if my gf and I get to this point, then we're talking way too often. (btw LDR 2.5 yrs...1 more month to go b4 moving back (yay!)). We'll have a break for a few days then talk again and discuss what's been happening the past couple days. It also helps that our time difference is 4.5 hrs and our work hours are totally different so we only talk a few days a week anyways. It gives you a bit more to talk about as opposed to only talking about what's been going on that current day.
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Old 03-23-2009, 06:56 PM   #5
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dude.. if u have a laptop wif a web cam and so does she.. go 2 the local starbucks get a drink together and webcam that shit up. ive done it once wif my gf.. i was in HK and she was in China... we just went to a local tea house that has internet.. and just web'd eachother... give that a shot man.. and what ever u do.. dont cheat... cuz once u do.. u cant go back.. serious!
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Old 03-23-2009, 07:26 PM   #6
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You should break up with her.

Let's be honest here...if you really cared about her and wanted the relationship to work out then you would never be asking us how she'd react if you wanted a break during those 4 months.

It's a cheap cop out and you're just using that as an excuse to justify sleeping around with other girls. You're thinking with the wrong head so you might as well just end it now instead of giving the poor girl heartache later on when she does find out that you slept around.
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Old 03-23-2009, 08:38 PM   #7
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asking for a break/open relationship when it's only going to be 4 months being apart seems like you won't be able to handle what a LDR will require from you. plus, if you've waited this long what's the hurt in waiting another 4months ?
spoken like a girl. 4 days can be along time to wait. 4 months is unacceptable unless she's 17 or something
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Old 03-23-2009, 09:52 PM   #8
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dude.. if u have a laptop wif a web cam and so does she.. go 2 the local starbucks get a drink together and webcam that shit up. ive done it once wif my gf.. i was in HK and she was in China... we just went to a local tea house that has internet.. and just web'd eachother... give that a shot man.. and what ever u do.. dont cheat... cuz once u do.. u cant go back.. serious!
you two are pure nerds. please don't tell me you two have headphone and mic, then you speak to each other with so many people looking at you. So weird.

Calling to China with a cell phone is like a dime hkd a second. I'd talk to her 5-6 hrs a day, that's only $15hkd ($2.5cdn)
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Old 03-23-2009, 10:19 PM   #9
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LDRs only work if both people are absolutely committed cause it's not child's play. It's twice as much work to keep a LDR going than an in-person relationship. If you're already doubting it now...then I doubt you have a chance, but you know what...you never know until you try.

I webcammed a lot with my ex when I was in a LDR, called him every day pretty much, talked on MSN. I got a VOIP phone with a 604 area code number so that he (along with my family and friends) could call me. You guys are visiting at least once a month so that's a good start. Good luck....
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Old 03-23-2009, 10:20 PM   #10
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^^i thought it was cute!
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Old 03-23-2009, 11:19 PM   #11
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you two are pure nerds. please don't tell me you two have headphone and mic, then you speak to each other with so many people looking at you. So weird.

Calling to China with a cell phone is like a dime hkd a second. I'd talk to her 5-6 hrs a day, that's only $15hkd ($2.5cdn)
fuck off LOL naa no mic stuff. XD but hey.. at least i get 2 see her.. =.=" i cant stand it if i dont get 2 see her LOL
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Old 03-23-2009, 11:42 PM   #12
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why? because you are weak?
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Old 03-24-2009, 12:39 AM   #13
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seriously do you think you're not gonna cheat because some of my girls have had guys go away only to find out that they totally hooked up with someone else and posted the pics on facebook but tried to lie about it and say the girls were cousins but do you really put your hand on your cousins ass i mean come on really so can you claim to do the same i doubt you can you should just end the pain right now because later on if you break up there'll be stress and you'll just feel bitter
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Old 03-24-2009, 01:45 AM   #14
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spoken like a girl. 4 days can be along time to wait. 4 months is unacceptable unless she's 17 or something
have you been in a ldr? i enjoy sex, in fact i LOVE sex probably as much as a guy. 4 months is long, i know that, but it's called control. when a person is in a healthy relationship and a committed one, there's nothing wrong with waiting it out. i know for one i wouldn't want to ruin a good thing just because i aint getting any. not all guys need to fuck something just because he aint getting any for awhile.
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Old 03-24-2009, 02:17 AM   #15
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have you been in a ldr? i enjoy sex, in fact i LOVE sex probably as much as a guy. 4 months is long, i know that, but it's called control. when a person is in a healthy relationship and a committed one, there's nothing wrong with waiting it out. i know for one i wouldn't want to ruin a good thing just because i aint getting any. not all guys need to fuck something just because he aint getting any for awhile.
i did a one month and a 6 month. one in korea and one in england for the time difference aspect. both sucked equally.
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Old 03-24-2009, 02:18 AM   #16
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and i never said it wasnt possible, just not optimal
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Old 03-24-2009, 08:04 AM   #17
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just use your hand if you really need to. If you really care about this girl, you'll wait it out, if not then just break up with her so both of you will be happier in the end
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Old 03-24-2009, 12:05 PM   #18
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just use your hand if you really need to. If you really care about this girl, you'll wait it out, if not then just break up with her so both of you will be happier in the end
think she'll get back with me in sept if i broke up with her now?
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Old 03-24-2009, 12:35 PM   #19
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why? because you are weak?
maybe... LOL
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Old 03-24-2009, 01:47 PM   #20
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post pics of ur current gf and well help u decide
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Old 03-24-2009, 03:10 PM   #21
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Screw it, Kelowna isnt LD. It's only 4 hrs away. U can go there every week
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Old 03-24-2009, 03:16 PM   #22
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unfortunately the reason why ldr don't work is because the two of you don't experience the same thing throughout the day and its just so hard to share... as much as you will call and talk...

but i don't think that's even ur concern... if you're thinking about fucking around chances are you might so be fair to her
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Old 03-24-2009, 03:35 PM   #23
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LoL Kelowna and Vancouver is totally not long distance..
Try 12,000 KM
If you just want to get laid, then you should just break it off with her.
4 months isn't even that long, plus who's to say even if you were there with her for those 4 months that she would have sex with you? If she doesn't want to, then there's really no forcing it on her.
It sounds like you just want to get laid, not that you're worry about being apart for a measly 4 months.
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Old 03-24-2009, 05:33 PM   #24
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You got your hands. Go use them since god gave us his tools for this.
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Old 03-24-2009, 08:39 PM   #25
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post pics of ur current gf and well help u decide
AAHHAHAH thats a good oneXD
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