should i show my frustration to her and change the deadline to next week or something>?

I find the most effective way is to show her that u've decided to move on. Frustration indicates that u'r desparate.

Reverse psychology works better in this case I think.

If you want to increase ur chances, go look for other girls. If she ends up saying no to u, then u can treat her as a "friend" and start discussing how u should chase these other girls. Sometimes jealousy is a powerful tool. And u win either way. A) She helps u get that other girl --> u have a gf or B) she gets jealous and thinks that she wants u --> u get a gf.

NO!! That move will only make you look more desperate.

Just leave it be, wait out the month and see what her verdict is. In the meantime, go have fun with your friends and meet some girls.

Btw, don't start bragging to her about all these chicks you've been meeting. Just mention how you had "soo much fun" with the boys THAT'S IT! Subtlety is very important, otherwise she can see right through the jealousy-move.

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how old are you anyways? and are you really a DJ?

Let her get back to you. If she doesn't get back to you then you already know her answer. Should have made a move before she left to work in Asia as 3 years is way to long to wait...

24 and im not a DJ, its one of my hobbies

To answer your question, during this one month period, just act like a really good friend. You are not her boyfriend, so don't act like one! But really...she doesn't like you. If she truly liked you, you wouldn't have to wait that long to get an answer from her especially if she is back in Vancouver for good...

edit: nevermind

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to which she'll prolly reply "oh, i didn't even know you left"

and that'll prolly sting a lil bit more

[edit] and it's not really ignoring her, if she's the one doing the ignoring....you'd just be on the receiving side of it not doing anything

i don't think you should bother.. it's so obvious she's not interested in ya.

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You should do what you do as a friend, but not too too close. Because if you start acting as a close friend, like previously stated - She won't know what the difference between having you as a friend or being with you and she'll just have the thought of: "OK, even if we don't date, he'll be there for me as a friend".

I mean, you could send out a few text messages, have a few short conversation phone calls but nothing too 'flirty' IMO.

just my .2 though.

sigh.. 1 month.. --> one month to think of a rejection line!

imo, she initiated and you refused, chances are that she won't initiate again because she feels like she got shut.

Honestly man if I were you I wouldn't mention it at all, acctually you should just act like you never even asked. If she has really been thinking about it and is serious about being with you, then she will bring it up. If she dosen't, then it seems like she is trying to avoid rejecting you because she probably dosen't want to hurt your feelings. So if she dosen't mention it, then its your choice if u want to be the type that says "I wont only be your friend" or you can try to get ur friendship back to normal........if that means anything to you.

I don't post here much, but I thought I'd chime in here with a piece of advice.

I have friends who're going through this right now, I know both the guy and the girl. Though, I know the girl better.

From what I've observed, the less the acts like he cares about their situation, the more she's able to think about whether she wants to be with him or not. Why? Simple. He's got confidence to carry on with his life and he treats her as a friend. When we hang out in group settings, he talks to other girls (the operative word being talks to, not overly flirtatious or tries to make her jealous) and he's just his regular old self. The worst thing you can do is make yourself a simpering fool and look overly desperate or try to be overly dramatic (ie. the 1 month deadline). When she called for coffee, you should've said, "Oh, I'm out right now, but let's hang out on <insert day>.", or something similar.

If I were you, when the "judgment" day comes, don't even think about it. Carry on like normal, hang out, smile, laugh and show her you care, but DON'T act like her bf. Let her make the call... she knows when the date was. If she doesn't bring it up, it's up for you to judge whether or not you should ask her about it.

Good luck! :thumbsup:

you fucked it, its game

thx, these basically sums it up ...

The trick now is to maintain your cool no matter how much you want to say something. That's all up to you man!

the fact you posted up was gay. you're in your mid 20s, grab some balls and figure it out. you also said "oh, maybe i shoudl change the deadilne" that just about killed me right then and there, seriously, areyou 10? this isn't elementary. We already told you she's not into you. if a girl likes you she woudl just say so.
Why do you think you need a YES or NO answer. learn to move on and get over shit like this. you just showed how weak you are and that's not good to your image. embrace what's going to happen and hopefully you'll feel like a crack whore who just blew 40 people for a hit cause you know what, after this, you'll become immune to this and you'll be soon be a man. It will make you stronger.

any updates DJCREW? :)

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^all those are LAME excuses.
if she really felt you needed to drop your PLANS at her beck and call, she's not worth it...