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The thin line between love and hate
Mature discussion about understanding the opposite sex...

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Old 05-22-2009, 05:55 PM   #1
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[Confidential] Open relationships/threesomes for a reason

The following is an Anonymous submission from a Revscene member. If the OP would like to respond to anything said in this thread, please PM me.

I was with my ex for number of years, we broke up a couple months ago basically because I was starting to pull myself away, she finally had enough and we ended it.

I was thinking for the past month or so before this that I'm still young (early 20's) and I need to get out and "explore" more things...women, places etc.

I had one pick up from a club during this time, and the next day it didn't really feel all that great, actually felt weird.

Last week I contacted her because I needed to exchange some stuff and I was starting to miss her etc. We got to talking and thought we should trying getting together again.

We went back to her place and fooled around for a bit, no sex.

Got together again later that week to see a movie and went back to her place and had sex.

She's totally still in love with me and I still care for her.

The only thing is I can't ignore is my desire to possible still want other women.

This girl is great is every other way and would be a great wife (which is where this would head).

I think another reason I was starting to pull away was I was starting to loose my physical attraction to her. She'd gained some weight over the years and I just wasn't "that" into her anymore. I've always mentioned to her to "go to the gym" but not in the typical asshole sort of way. More stay healthy, you look so great when you're working out etc.

All I really want is some sex elsewhere (above might be why), is this really wrong? Yes I know it is but why?

A threesome, with her and another girl, would defiently keep me happy. If I just went off and did it on my own, it would only be sex. And to tell you the truth I'd still feel guilty about it, that's why I want her there.

We've joked and talked about having a threesome over the years, and how she thinks women are "hot" but she's never given any inclination to do anything more than just talk about it.

I've always indicated I was serious but again nothing has come of it.

What do you guys think?

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Old 05-24-2009, 02:15 AM   #2
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The only way to get her into shape, is to start with yourself and ask her to go running with you etc.

I have several couple friends are really fit and sports active (e.g. play ultimate, hiking, etc) back in Vancouver, but cannot think of a single couple where one person is ultra fit, and the other leads a sedentery "fat" life.

Since you are losing physical attraction for her, going hardcore to the gym together or running may be a way to lead both of you back?

It'd also do wonders for you too, if you're not a health nut!
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Old 05-25-2009, 03:17 PM   #3
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just talk about having a 3some regularly...at least twice a day
shell prob get so sick of it that shed wanna try it and when she does...BAM!!!
ur set for life
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Old 05-25-2009, 09:10 PM   #4
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Or say you're serious about it. As explicitly as possible. I find a good ego crushing at the same time usually helps.
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Old 05-25-2009, 09:17 PM   #5
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If she's not interested in a 3some with another chick but wants to try a gangbang instead, PM me and Ill send you my number.
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Old 05-26-2009, 07:36 AM   #6
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If she's not interested in a 3some with another chick but wants to try a gangbang instead, PM me and Ill send you my number.
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Old 05-26-2009, 03:38 PM   #7
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If she's not interested in a 3some with another chick but wants to try a gangbang instead, PM me and Ill send you my number.
hey count me in!
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Old 05-26-2009, 06:02 PM   #8
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I've never had a threesome and I've never been married, but I imagine if I did have a 3some with my wife and someone else in the past it would have long-standing implications for the marriage well into the future. For you it might be fine but probably not for your wife. How about if the 3some was with another guy. Do you think 10 years down the line you wouldn't remember vividly your wife fucking that other guy? Think about how hard it would be for you, a guy, and then think about how hard it would be for an emotionally charged woman (god forbid, around her time of the month!).

If you wanna screw around, don't get back with your ex for a while and have your fun now. If you wanna have a 3some make damn-sure its not with your future life-partner.
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Old 05-26-2009, 08:14 PM   #9
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would you be willing to have a 3some with her and another dude? if not, don't even consider bringing up a 3-way with 2 chicks... can't have your cake and eat it too, UNLESS she wants to
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Old 05-26-2009, 09:10 PM   #10
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dump her already, you guys aren't making it
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Old 05-26-2009, 09:39 PM   #11
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Dude, a 3some will break your relationship. Don't do it. 3somes only work when all parties are mutual and there's not emotional attachment with anyone.

It's understandable, you're young, you want to experience more before you settle down with her. Talk to her? This is where you have to decide and make some sacrifices in your life OR you can risk losing her. Bang a few chicks and hopefully she's still waiting for you likelihood of that? Slim. Unless she's not desirable by other men.
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Old 05-28-2009, 02:44 PM   #12
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Being bored, you start to fantanzie
when you fantanzie, you start to imagine things.
when you imagine things, you plan for things.
when you plan for things, you put things in motion.
when you start to put things in motion, you get tempted.
once you get tempted you cheat.

no one wakes up one day and say, "hey, i want to cheat today"
i've read this in a book and if you really want to go thru life cheating on other women, or even thinking about it, just be careful cause once you do it, there's no turning back.

*this is coming from a cheater who has cheated, got caught and finally release what i have done and make sure i won't ever do it again. i have great friends to hold me accountable in preventing these things don't happen again.
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Old 05-28-2009, 02:57 PM   #13
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true that, i use to think cheating was horrible and unrecoverable

after doing it, and seeing many others do the same, i could care less
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Old 06-01-2009, 12:26 PM   #14
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after doing it, and seeing many others do the same, i could care less
this seems to be teh mentality ive noticed out in the west coast. (dont take this as an insult)

wins for me!
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Old 06-01-2009, 12:45 PM   #15
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Dude, a 3some will break your relationship.
Not always It all depends on the couple and how they are individually. Healthy relationships aren't only limited to conservative relationships.

Anyways, been there, done that, and I wouldn't worry about it. Short of paying cash for it, it's one of the most difficultest things to pull off. It's practically the holy grail for men. You'll find that a lot of chicks like to talk about it, joke about it, pretend to want it but will never really do it. Heck most of the time, girls that talk, play and joke kinky wouldn't even have the guts to walk into a sex shop "alone".

So I don't really see this happening, unless you luck out on that small margin.
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Old 06-01-2009, 03:21 PM   #16
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My GF and I visit swingers clubs. Open relationships have their perks, yet require a LOT more communication than most people want to put the effort into.
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