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The thin line between love and hate
Mature discussion about understanding the opposite sex...

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Old 07-16-2011, 10:58 AM   #1
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[Confidential] Locker room random hook-up post-guilt

The following post is from an anonymous member. If they would like to reply to any replies please pm me.



I do not consider myself as gay, (I have a GF) but I am curious that's how I got myself into this. I'm having what I call post-hookup guilt / anxiety. I feel fatigue and don't want to do anything and go anywhere. I feel gross about the whole event afterward.

The person and I only met for a few times. I'm feeling this guilt/worry because I don't know what he will do when he see me elsewhere (he hadn't "release" and I left) and I believe some people noticed what had happened too. I do not want my life to be ruined by this random person and this event. I recognize what I had done does not meet my moral standard but I can't change what had already happened.

My question is what should I do to get rid of this guilt feeling?
Should I just ignore the whole situation and stop going to the same place or should I go back and tell that person that I have a GF and I am straight. Any other suggestion?
Also, what should I do if I randomly see that person in the future?

Thank you

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Old 07-16-2011, 11:27 AM   #2
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I'm sort of lost wtf you're talking about. Did you hook up with the guy or not. Can you just outright say it so we get a better understanding?

You are right, you have done something (whatever it is, cause I'm having trouble reading between the lines) and you're right.. you can't change it, either you suck it up, move forward or you can put yourself in the same situation.

You can't put away this guilt feeling. Either you REMOVE yourself from this guy / girl / transgender and never to hang out or you can put yourself in the same situation again and make a bigger mistake.

If you see the person in the future, just say HI, lift your head up high as if nothing has happened. We are in 2011, things come and go and both of you should be mature enough to just let it go.
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Old 07-16-2011, 12:07 PM   #3
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I might get failed for this.Dude I'm pretty sure you are gay or maybe bisexual, straight men are very comfortable with their sexuality and aren't curious enough to ever hook up with a guy.
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Old 07-16-2011, 12:19 PM   #4
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You having a gf doesn't always mean you're straight. It might be that you're hiding yourself from what other people will think of you.
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Old 07-16-2011, 12:30 PM   #5
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As always, "Confidential" threads are for serious responses.

No snide or degrading remarks.
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Old 07-16-2011, 12:31 PM   #6
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Araaadi View Post
I might get failed for this.Dude I'm pretty sure you are gay or maybe bisexual, straight men are very comfortable with their sexuality and aren't curious enough to ever hook up with a guy.
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I don't know about that curious comment. I remember watching one of the funny comedy movies I think American Pie it was? Stifler says, "damn you think about it but I can't believe you followed through hahahah!" (fuck I forgot the movie but remember the scene-this will drive me crazy)

I like overcoming my fears, but this topic wouldn't be one of them. You know that feeling when you walk beside your buddy on the sidewalk and your hands graze one another for half a second? Man that alone gives me a cringe feeling.

To OP what's done is done, whatever happened happened. If your ashamed just shut the hell up, carry on with life and take it to the grave is my advice.
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Old 07-16-2011, 12:40 PM   #7
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If you feel a guilt over engaging in some sort of sexual act with a person other than your girlfriend then the answer is simple, come clean. Let it her know what happened and how your feeling, hopefully she'll understand and forgive you but that's impossible to predict.

If your guilt is over hooking up with a guy, you have much more deep seeded issues than anyone could ever even begin to address here. There's nothing wrong with being bi-sexual and if at the time it was occured you enjoyed it, while you just might be..

Last edited by MindBomber; 07-16-2011 at 12:46 PM.
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Old 07-16-2011, 01:59 PM   #8
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This doesn't automatically make you gay or bisexual. Have you ever considered yourself Bi-curious?

Anyways, I agree with the above. If you feel so guilty about it, just come clean to your girlfriend. Might feel better to get it off your chest. And if you're so afraid of this guy advancing on you, then tell him you have a girlfriend and that it won't happen again.
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Old 07-16-2011, 02:33 PM   #9
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wait.... The story doesnt explain anything.
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Old 07-16-2011, 10:33 PM   #10
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op needs to be more descriptive of what happened in the locker room. Were you both changing and wanking each others dick or what? needs more content!
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Old 07-16-2011, 10:47 PM   #11
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I'm guessing the OP hooked up with some guy in the locker room and felt guilty for doing so because it violated his morals as a guy??!

OP needs to clarify more in exact details if he wants a serious response or else we're just all gonna be here guessing and pondering what he is trying to express.
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Old 07-17-2011, 03:49 AM   #12
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sorry had to

Last edited by k2_alpha; 07-17-2011 at 01:29 PM. Reason: Failure to heed warning
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Old 07-17-2011, 07:49 AM   #13
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is this a question of sexuality or that the fact that you a falling for someone else or both?

If its falling for someone else, i think its a natural thing. Its probably that your current relationship is not going well and you want to find someone better. If your current relationship is good, then there is not need for you to have feelings for someone else.
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Old 07-17-2011, 10:21 AM   #14
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Need more Info.
LIKE did u just look at the other guys' junk and go OMG THAT'S HUGE! or U actually stick your junk in his ASS (or he stick his junk up the your Ass) or You guys french kiss.......

Without much info we can't really help you. But I would say if you have this guilt feeling best to tell your GF about it.
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Old 07-17-2011, 11:33 AM   #15
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Tachycardia! View Post
The following post is from an anonymous member. If they would like to reply to any replies please pm me.

The person and I only met for a few times. I'm feeling this guilt/worry because I don't know what he will do when he see me elsewhere (he hadn't "release" and I left) and I believe some people noticed what had happened too.
What the shit? Were you guys getting at each others' junk in public where people can see/hear you??

Dude, you need to sit down and re-evaluate your sexual interests. Talk to a sex therapist or specialist ASAP. Like someone else already said, a girlfriend doesn't automatically grant you your sexual preference. I doubt you'll get a helpful answer here.
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Old 07-18-2011, 09:30 AM   #16
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^ i don't think a person can sit down and re-evaluate their sexual interests. I'm not sure about you but have you done that? There are a lot of bi-curious people and there are people who are border line on the tipping point to being gay and it's not like they can sit down and circle which side they prefer.
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Old 07-18-2011, 09:56 AM   #17
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i think he hooked up with a guy in some locker room area but left the guy before he came and thinks people knew what was going on and is now confused/ashamed and now wants to know what he should do
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Old 07-18-2011, 11:32 AM   #18
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You need to start by reconciling with yourself. You shouldn't avoid the situation because it would only make you feel terrible if you don't solve it. By solving it I mean yourself. It does matter what people think of you if you are not confident. But the main problem here is that you are hating yourself for it. Find out what needs to be done for you to accept who you are and slowly pave the way for healing.
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Old 07-18-2011, 12:52 PM   #19
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Definately need more info.

From what I can tell, you did something sexual, and you feel guilty by this.
Guilty would therefore suggest that you feel guilty for the fact of cheating on your GF, so you can come clean to her.

OR

Forget about it, don't go back to the same place, move on. If you ever see this guy somewhere else, just ignore him and walk on by.

But if you feel bad about doing what you did, you need to re-evalute yourself definately.
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Old 07-20-2011, 10:18 AM   #20
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Definately need more info.

From what I can tell, you did something sexual, and you feel guilty by this.
Guilty would therefore suggest that you feel guilty for the fact of cheating on your GF, so you can come clean to her.
It's not clear if the OP had sex with the guy, game him oral or gave him a handjob. Something sexual happened either way. Like others have said, you either need to man up and put it behind you and not tell your gf or come clean to your gf. You may be bi curious.

Last edited by hotjoint; 07-20-2011 at 11:38 AM.
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Old 07-20-2011, 12:13 PM   #21
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troll?
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Old 07-20-2011, 12:50 PM   #22
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Just know that by not coming clean to your gf, you'll only have more guilt in your mind later on. If you take your relationship to the a very serious level then honesty is key.

...although I kinda think we're being trolled
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Old 07-23-2011, 10:51 PM   #23
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The following post is from an anonymous member. If they would like to reply to any replies please pm me.




My question is what should I do to get rid of this guilt feeling?
Should I just ignore the whole situation and stop going to the same place or should I go back and tell that person that I have a GF and I am straight. Any other suggestion?
Also, what should I do if I randomly see that person in the future?

Thank you
just come outta the closet. and stop lying to yourself and others. u are gay, not straight
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Old 07-26-2011, 11:08 AM   #24
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Dutch Rudder?

anyways you came, he didn't?

you went home and felt bad a guy made u come?

bi-sexuality is just a Detour on the way to Gay town.

you are not straight. the sooner you come to grips with that, the better you will feel.

also your GF will appreciate being dumped now rather than 15 years down the road with 4 kids and being abandoned.
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Old 07-26-2011, 04:58 PM   #25
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Simple test. Does this arouse you?

Spoiler!
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