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The thin line between love and hate
Mature discussion about understanding the opposite sex...

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Old 12-08-2011, 07:23 PM   #1
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why men and women can't be friends

just a short video that i believe speaks for 80% of the relationships out there between men and women.

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Old 12-08-2011, 07:39 PM   #2
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I want my 3 minutes back
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Old 12-08-2011, 07:48 PM   #3
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What the guy is gay? Then can woman and gay guy be JUST FRIENDS?
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Old 12-08-2011, 07:50 PM   #4
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The vast majority of my close friends have been women for my entire life, perhaps I belong to your twenty percent figure, because this video absolutely does not apply to me. Even if a male friend of a women does have a fleeting sexual attraction to her how often is acted upon, because all the girls seem to be having no difficulty maintaining their male friends as exclusively friends?

I'm also wondering, what exactly is the purpose of this video..
- Is it intended to be fuel for insecure and jealous boyfriends, who date girls with male friends?
- A public service announcement, encouraging men and women to socialize exclusively with their own sex?

Last edited by MindBomber; 12-08-2011 at 07:57 PM.
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Old 12-08-2011, 07:51 PM   #5
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The interviewer makes wide, sweeping generalizations. Yes, it's for comedy and all, but you still can't just look at it with tunnel vision.

If the guy is gay, there can be friendship.
If the guy is not attracted to the girl, there can be friendship.
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Old 12-08-2011, 07:54 PM   #6
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This is true to the bone for me.

My best girl friend is my girlfriend.

Figures.

I never ever had a close girl friend with no feelings involved.
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Old 12-08-2011, 08:12 PM   #7
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I find it all depends on HOW you meet this person.

Alone, in class/library/grocery store/coffee shop/etc...Then maybe something peaked your interest but you guys stay "just friends".

Friends of friends or friends of your SO, etc....then there is never really that thought that there could be something more.

Maybe that is just the experience I have had...I have had a lot of different guys friends and I always found that it would depend on how I met them.
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Old 12-08-2011, 08:31 PM   #8
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Im good friends with my best friends sister.... I dont have feelings for her. I am friends with my other friends girl friends, it dosnt mean i am attracted to them :S. Video would have been a waste of time if i had a life lol
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Old 12-08-2011, 08:36 PM   #9
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lol what a bunch of bullshit

these guys must be constantly
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Old 12-09-2011, 12:58 AM   #10
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Exactly my point...why would you be interested in being best friends with a girl..what can you really have in common.. and the things you do have in common will only make you more.

Mindbomber failed me because I said this was true for me.
What a homo.
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Old 12-09-2011, 01:14 AM   #11
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Exactly my point...why would you be interested in being best friends with a girl..what can you really have in common.. and the things you do have in common will only make you more.

Mindbomber failed me because I said this was true for me.
What a homo.
I failed you, because the video is referencing plutonic relationships and you used a romantic one as an example. If you stated that it began as a plutonic friendship and evolved into something romantic it would be relevant, that key detail is lacking.

I have more in common with women than with the vast majority of men, why would I necessarily feel the need to cross the boundary of friendship with a woman just because we're close?

I'm sorry, but my opinion on this issue is extremely strong, since I have lost friends over jealous boyfriends being unable to accept the concept that a man and woman can just be friends. Any sweeping conclusion is just ridiculous in my honest opinion, regardless of the issue.
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Old 12-09-2011, 07:09 AM   #12
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I thought this thread was going to be a picture of a vagina. Because that's exactly why men and women can't be friends.
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Old 12-09-2011, 09:38 AM   #13
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First of all.. the video is just for laughs guys..

Secondly, @MindBomber, you just said you're not like the 'vast majority' of men. I think 'vast majority' could be translated to about 80%, so OPs statement is probably still true.
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Old 12-09-2011, 10:57 AM   #14
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Old 12-09-2011, 02:22 PM   #15
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Haha this was a pretty interesting video to watch. Waste of 3 minutes? Not so much. An informative video? Nah.

I think there really is a difference between men/women frienships, and a woman's submissive feelings for a man. At first thought, most women would say yes to the question "Do you think men and women can be friends?" And I'm sure this really is true for most people. When its friendship, it really is a friendship. The interviewer than goes on to ask something along the lines of "Do you think your best friend would hook up with you if he knew you liked him?" You see, once there's a change in feelings in a friendship there really is no turning back. Friendship Relationships/Couple Relationships are entirely different. Maybe before the guy knew the girl liked him he would have remained neutral for his feelings towards the girl. When the girl expresses a different form of love for the guy, is there really any other reason for the guy not to take the opportunity? I mean, the only reason the guy would really be in a close friendship with another girl in the first place is because he has no SO.

There really is no basis to this video at all.
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Old 12-09-2011, 03:41 PM   #16
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First of all.. the video is just for laughs guys..

Secondly, @MindBomber, you just said you're not like the 'vast majority' of men. I think 'vast majority' could be translated to about 80%, so OPs statement is probably still true.
My position is no different than any other friendship between a man and woman, because even though as men we have the insatiable urge to have sex with every attractive woman we come in contact with very few of us would ever act on those urges with a friend. The video has no evidence and therefore no validity, it does not show one example where a friendship was ruined by the genetic male urges to procreate.
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Old 12-09-2011, 09:05 PM   #17
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My position is no different than any other friendship between a man and woman, because even though as men we have the insatiable urge to have sex with every attractive woman we come in contact with very few of us would ever act on those urges with a friend. The video has no evidence and therefore no validity, it does not show one example where a friendship was ruined by the genetic male urges to procreate.
I have to respectfully disagree with your view on this thread. Although I am like you and don't have the urge to knock up every single women I meet, I still don't like to be friends with them because they usually lack the substance to carry a meaningful conversation. Even the smartest ones still speak in a different channel to me because they have different priorities.

When I am with my guy friends we usually talk about where to open our next stores/factories/products/stocks/currencies/houses. But when I talk to women, they usually talk about, hmmmmmm should I have Chinese tea today? or Japanese tea today? omg live.laugh.love etc
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Old 12-10-2011, 12:10 AM   #18
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I have to respectfully disagree with your view on this thread. Although I am like you and don't have the urge to knock up every single women I meet, I still don't like to be friends with them because they usually lack the substance to carry a meaningful conversation. Even the smartest ones still speak in a different channel to me because they have different priorities.

When I am with my guy friends we usually talk about where to open our next stores/factories/products/stocks/currencies/houses. But when I talk to women, they usually talk about, hmmmmmm should I have Chinese tea today? or Japanese tea today? omg live.laugh.love etc
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Old 12-10-2011, 12:19 AM   #19
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I have to respectfully disagree with your view on this thread. Although I am like you and don't have the urge to knock up every single women I meet, I still don't like to be friends with them because they usually lack the substance to carry a meaningful conversation. Even the smartest ones still speak in a different channel to me because they have different priorities.

When I am with my guy friends we usually talk about where to open our next stores/factories/products/stocks/currencies/houses. But when I talk to women, they usually talk about, hmmmmmm should I have Chinese tea today? or Japanese tea today? omg live.laugh.love etc
That may well be true for the majority women from Asia, and I will not contend, a percentage of Canadian women are equally shallow minded, but an inability to mentally connect is not what the video proposes to be the barrier. It suggests, men will inevitably want to sleep with any female friend they have making friendships one sided and invalid. The women I am friends with have similar interests to myself and are pursuing academics with the intent of a professional career, we don't discuss tea, but rather our current scholastic pursuits, politics, current events and of course life in general. In no way are my conversations with women any less intelligent than men, the only difference might be that I enjoy discussing fashion with my female friends, while I might discuss cars with a male.

I don't think we disagree Zyzz, but we certainly did interpret the video differently.

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Old 12-10-2011, 12:40 AM   #20
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its stuff like this
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Old 12-19-2011, 01:40 PM   #21
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If you have a vagina, I can't be your friend. period. Wait, you gotta be ugly too. at that point, then i don't wanna be your friend.

men are simple. if they are friendly with a girl, they wanna fuck. Otherwise, they are gay.

Women can be friends with anyone, no problem.
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Old 12-19-2011, 03:59 PM   #22
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If you have a vagina, I can't be your friend. period. Wait, you gotta be ugly too. at that point, then i don't wanna be your friend.

men are simple. if they are friendly with a girl, they wanna fuck. Otherwise, they are gay.

Women can be friends with anyone, no problem.
bingo, i dont pick women to be my friends so i can have delightful conversations with them, i become friends with beautiful women with the thought in mind that we might hook up somewhere down the line.

who cares if its 1 sided friendship.

every guy does it, and if you say you dont, then im just gonna guess and say your probably married/have a gf. if not...my next thought is that your probably gay.

id personally hook up with every girl whom im friends with if i had the chance to. im not talking about all the women i have on facebook...90% of those are highschool people who i really dont have any intentions of ever hanging out with..but the 10% of women who i actually do call to hang out are women i would do in a second.
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Old 12-19-2011, 04:07 PM   #23
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The vast majority of my close friends have been women for my entire life, perhaps I belong to your twenty percent figure, because this video absolutely does not apply to me. Even if a male friend of a women does have a fleeting sexual attraction to her how often is acted upon, because all the girls seem to be having no difficulty maintaining their male friends as exclusively friends?

I'm also wondering, what exactly is the purpose of this video..
- Is it intended to be fuel for insecure and jealous boyfriends, who date girls with male friends?
- A public service announcement, encouraging men and women to socialize exclusively with their own sex?
get both of them drunk together alone....all it takes is one night of partying or drinking to much...some playful joking around starts, you both start getting more and more comfortable and before you know it, your both waking up the next morning and shes probably never talking to you again...wich honestly doesnt bother me 1 bit. I became her friend to eventually fuck her, and i got what i wanted. IF something more comes from it, then sure ill go along with it, but if not...who the fuck cares...i can easily go out to a club or bar and meet women and add new "friends" to my list.
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Old 12-19-2011, 04:13 PM   #24
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if you can't have a friend that's a girl then you lack some personality
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Old 12-19-2011, 04:16 PM   #25
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Men are from mars and women are from venus they say?

Usually and typically, a man and a woman wouldnt hangout together for strictly platonic reasons.

I can think of only a couple of girls i genuinely would not want to hook up with that i would consider hanging out with: one of them is a lesbian the other is a tom boy.

Maybe it comes down to another issue as well. Would you want this woman infiltrating your circle of friends (guys). You bring your woman friend into the group, and shes bound to attract or be attracted to the other guys in your group. Next thing you know, her and your best friend joe are making sweet music in your own bedroom. She and jolly Joe elope and Joe's brain is haywire which the woman friend commands at her will. Now she is a force within your circle. Joe may never be the same again. Instead of drinking beer weekly with you, hes caught doing gingerbread bake offs and shopping with her at forever 21
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