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The thin line between love and hate
Mature discussion about understanding the opposite sex...

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Old 02-02-2012, 01:40 AM   #1
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Friend is threatening suicide. Anyone have any insight?

Well tonight I received a weird text from a good friend back home.
him "sorry"
me "for what"
him "for being me, I know I've hurt you and everyone else I know"
me "everyone hurts someone at some point man, we are all good, you know that. You alright?"
him "love you man."
me "love you too dude. But seriously... you alright?"
him "I hate myself"
me "don't say that man, I think you have got a problem. But don't worry, problems are all solvable.
him "me not being around will be the only way to solve it"


After that I phoned him. He was absolutely losing it, screaming how no one gives a fuck about him, and the only way they will is at his funeral. I asked him if he was at home and he said no. Then he said "this will be the last time you talk to me" and hung up. I phoned the cops, gave them all his info, car description and all that shit and also his roommates. After that which took about 10 minutes his roommate called me and said he was on the way to the hospital, taking my friend there. He had been making the threats to him as well over the phone, but then ended up showing up at home continuing the threats.

Now he's been texting me, I guess he is in the psych ward. Saying stuff like "you all got what you wanted"
"you finally broke me and proved I'm crazy"
"you don't get it"
He's still texting me thing like this at the moment. Just turning everything on the friends that are trying to help him. He's done stuff like this before, honestly maybe 20 + times, but never so serious. I don't really know what the next step I can take to help him is. Maybe he doesn't want to be helped? Does anyone have experience similar to this that has come out positively after so many times? This is definitely taking a lot out of me. Anyways. Insert csb here. But seriously any insight would help.

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Old 02-02-2012, 01:49 AM   #2
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Good on you for calling the cops so soon to stop him from doing anything further, I've had a friend to through something like that and the best you can do is always be supportive no matter what they say
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Old 02-02-2012, 01:51 AM   #3
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Hopefully this isn't too personal, but any reason why he's acting like this? Some people are way too emotional and not see what damage they are doing. I doubt he would commit sucide, just knowing that ur life is gone might be too much for him to handle and just cry himself. 20+ times? Sounds like he wants attention
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Old 02-02-2012, 02:00 AM   #4
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Well being that no one knows him on here, I can give a little personal insight. He's always clearly had anger problems. Some VERY fucked up things happened to him as a child. Before I never took him as serious as tonight. You know that moment when your mind clicks and you just go "fuck.....shit just got serious" He is also on some anti-depressant meds, and was out drinking heavily. My mother's husband almost exactly a year ago killed himself in the same sort of situation. Was always on anti depressants, but switched meds, got drunk, said fuck it and crushed a few bottles of painkillers and sleeping pills and that was it. The situation lines up much to well with the previous one, so I may take it more serious than it is.
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Old 02-02-2012, 02:04 AM   #5
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wanting attention or not, I think you should keep an eye on him more. help him thru this hard time. thats what friends are for.

A friends friend suicided from depression. everyone thought it was just a joke. as he was just fine the day before.

you never know.
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Old 02-02-2012, 02:12 AM   #6
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Fuck eh, dependency on anti depressant are horrible lol, I know a few people who went off it and were emotional wrecks, drinking isn't recommended when taking em. Moral support, laughs and just being there for him should help him out.
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Old 02-02-2012, 02:36 AM   #7
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Two words: Cognitive Therapy

To oversimplify, cognitive therapy states that the world we "see" is not the real world, what we see is our "interpretation" of the world. And whenever we feel depressed, anxious, etc., it's not because of the world per say, but because of how we interpret it. As Shakespeare once wrote "Nothing is good or bad but thinking makes it so."

The goal of cognitive therapy is to get the patient to understand this psychological process and then to systematically analyze our "interpretations" of the world because it is these interpretations that are making us unhappy, not the world itself. And once we can see that it is our "interpretations" that are not serving us, we can change our interpretations, and thus our life.

Studying how the mind works, and cognitive therapy in particular, has helped me immensely get over tough times in the past.

Good luck with your friend man.
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Old 02-02-2012, 10:48 AM   #8
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You have got to get these people in front of professionals that can help. That becomes your fight, making sure that the right people are involved.

You can only go so far in helping people "in house".
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Old 02-02-2012, 11:28 AM   #9
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People who are suicidal need proffessional help IMMEDIATELY.
You should contact his family as well to let them know and offer to take him to a doctor yourself but he needs to get there, even if you have to take him to an emergency room.
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Old 02-02-2012, 12:30 PM   #10
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Drop the anti depressants and booze and hit the gym go hiking get active and if he already is get more active and find someone to do it with. Anti depressants are not good for you they cover up underlying problems that need to be found and realized. Inner reflection and goal achievment is the only way there and the only way to self respect and love.
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Old 02-02-2012, 10:01 PM   #11
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Thanks for the words so far guys, they are helpful. As said We made sure he did end up in the er and spent overnight in the hospital. Also my friend informed his mother. I talked to him today, layer out the best advice I could so far, so I guess we will just see. No matter how much I try I realize I can't make decisions for someone, but I'm trying my hardest to help.
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Old 02-02-2012, 11:17 PM   #12
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There's only so much you can help. Sometimes a real bro talk could put you in a better position to understand him and keeping an eye on him frequently. You should call him out for a beer or to chat sometimes to catch up with his life or even to do some activities like working out or having some fun.
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Old 02-02-2012, 11:25 PM   #13
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get him laid
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Old 02-02-2012, 11:36 PM   #14
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Quote:
Originally Posted by BaoTurbo View Post
There's only so much you can help. Sometimes a real bro talk could put you in a better position to understand him and keeping an eye on him frequently. You should call him out for a beer or to chat sometimes to catch up with his life or even to do some activities like working out or having some fun.
Its tough, because he's back home in edmonton, and I'm here in van so there is only so much I can see him. I had him out for new years and we had a wicked time, everything seemed all good. I'm trying to convince him to move here, as (ex)relationship issues seem to be the biggest trigger, and edmonton, everybody always does the same fucking thing, in the same fucking place, and you always end up being around people you don't want to. We chatted a bunch tonight and I feel I got through to him at least a bit, but he still has this wall up when someone tells him he needs help. I know the relationship problem is clearly a small part of a way bigger issue at hand, but every little bit of negativity you can remove helps I'm sure. As for eurochevy, he fucks plenty of chicks. Sweet advice brosephine.
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Old 02-02-2012, 11:58 PM   #15
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you're lucky he's at least talking to you, there is still time to do something, DO NOT BLOW THIS opportunity to possibly save his life....
I have to live with regret I couldn't do anything for my friend, one day we're laughing walking down the school hallway talking, without a care in the world... the next day he kneels in front of the skytrain at joyce and just lets himself go....

I couldn't take the skytrain for about 5 years after that.....
you and your friend still have a chance, get him to a professional do whatever it takes !
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Old 02-03-2012, 01:43 AM   #16
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I had a professor with depression that suddenly passed away halfway through the semester. It was really saddening because it was so unexpected, no one would've thought that would happen. You could tell that he was having a really hard time because of the tone of his voice and his facial expression.

Looking back, I wished I actually talked to him more because he was a great professor.
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Old 02-03-2012, 01:52 AM   #17
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He's in Edmonton in the winter, that's got to be tough
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Old 02-03-2012, 01:54 AM   #18
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He had the wrong combination of drugs. I had a friend who was drunk and high on some sort of pain killer and we were hanging out with a few friends and suddenly he pulled a knife on one of our friends and accused him of not being a real bro.
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