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The thin line between love and hate
Mature discussion about understanding the opposite sex...

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Old 04-06-2012, 06:34 PM   #1
What hasn't Killed me, has made me more tolerant of RS!
 
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Dating outside your race

I am an Asian guy with a preference towards white women- a far less common pairing than the opposite. I am involved in a great relationship currently with a Danish girl and I couldn't be happier. Barring 2 (one east indian, one Japanese) all my relationships have been with white girls. I just seem to click with them more. Though I have given Asian girls a chance, our personalities just do not click. Believe me I've tried. So much so that if I were to chose between an attractive Asian girl and attractive White girl, I'd probably chose the latter (unless the Asian girl was out of the stratosphere hot). Recently I showed my grand mother a picture of my gf when I went back home, and she was shocked that I was dating a Caucasian. She really wanted me to date an Asian girl. And so I began to ask myself why my preferences were this way. Of course, I did grow up surrounded with white friends and was into rock and roll, muscle cars, playing guitar, hiking, camping, etc in high school so I naturally gravitated towards the women who are into that same stuff- which mostly happened to be white girls. Then in HS I lost my v-card to a white chick and haven't looked back since. Though there are some ridiculously hot asian girls I'd love to hook up with, I always end up coming back to the tried tested and true.

I was wondering if there were any other Asian guys on RS who are kind of in the same boat. If so how do your peers/family handle it, and why did you go that route? I am curious about the answers. I mean, when I'm with alone my girl (or any of my exes), I forget we are of different races, but sometimes I draw some glances from Asian women when we go out in public,especially in predominantly Asian areas/ restaurants and I began to notice the elephant in the room so-to-speak. It is not just with her, but the last 8 white women I have dated. It also comes out a bit more when I'm with my family who prefer I date within my race. Her family loves me and she is super liberal, but usually in these relationships it's the guys for some reason that notice it more. It's also weird how I get more slack (ironically from Asian females since I am totally cool with Asian girls and white guys), than she does from white males.

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Old 04-06-2012, 08:48 PM   #2
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When it comes to family acceptance, it depends on the conservative level. Asian families typically are further right in the conservative scale. Your grandmother's reaction is most likely due to her being a bit conservative.

I think you hit the nail on the head with your reason on why you are more interested in Caucasians. Your interest simply align with caucasians more than asians. There most likely some asians who have the same interest as you, but they are rare.

The looks you are receiving from asians is due to the fact that mixed race relationships are rare. Plus it is usually a white guy with an asian girl. They look at you simply cause they are curious. They may judge you, but fuck them. You are in a happy relationship with a girl you like.
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Old 04-07-2012, 12:07 PM   #3
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When it comes to family acceptance, it depends on the conservative level. Asian families typically are further right in the conservative scale. Your grandmother's reaction is most likely due to her being a bit conservative.

I think you hit the nail on the head with your reason on why you are more interested in Caucasians. Your interest simply align with caucasians more than asians. There most likely some asians who have the same interest as you, but they are rare.

The looks you are receiving from asians is due to the fact that mixed race relationships are rare. Plus it is usually a white guy with an asian girl. They look at you simply cause they are curious. They may judge you, but fuck them. You are in a happy relationship with a girl you like.
True that my friend. Are you in the same boat? Regardless, words of wisdom. I have also found that I like the Caucasian personality more, it's hard to describe and it may sound like a stereotype, but I just click more with white women. I can make them laugh better, talk more and just in general have a good time. Then again, maybe it's not so much the race that I am interested in, just that western personality.
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Old 04-08-2012, 04:56 PM   #4
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It depends heavily on your personality.

I usually didn't click with Caucasoid female of my nationality.

I ended up messing around with an asian chick.
It was easier.. I felt at ease at least.. around her.

I do find them (asian chicks) more appealing at random. For example if I saw an asian girl and a white girl, I'd focus more on the asian girl. Probably because it's a little foreign to me and my culture, and that's the key for me. The relationship will have a bit more mystery and stuff to it. It's pretty nice. Maybe that's why I had an affinity for them. Still do.

I'm engaged to a white womin now, but only due to love. You can't choose who you love.
-Guy who preferred asian girls to white girl.

EDIT: I wouldn't even say preferred.. I just was more interested , that's all. This takes away nothing from the white women. It's like you like M&M's right.. all taste the same.. but you just chose the red one over the blue one because you like how the red color looks like over the blue.
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Old 04-08-2012, 09:25 PM   #5
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I'm Asian and I dated a white girl in HS. It was fun and was definitely something new.
I didn't think it was that big of a deal because a lot of my friends are white.
My parents actually prefer me dating a Caucasian girl because they think they are more down to earth and more focused on what's important in life (or at least what they think is important), and don't just want to party and go clubbing all the time like a lot of asian girls do now.
In my experiences, most of the white girls that I have been more attracted to were in fact, girls that somewhat know how they want to live their life, who know their goals and are somewhat independent.
Granted I've only dated one Caucasian girl and my other ex's are Asian, I guess I don't have much experience, but I definitely don't regret it.

I had an Asian friend who dated a Caucasian girl and although they broke up, both families were fine with it and were pretty close.
Another Caucasian good friend of mine broke up with her Filipino boyfriend a few months ago after 3 years, but both of their families were fine with it too.

Now I'm in a great relationship with an Asian girl that I really love and if I ever had to find a new love (knock on wood) then I sure wouldn't mind dating a Caucasian girl
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Old 04-08-2012, 09:55 PM   #6
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I'm Chinese and I have dated women from various backgrounds. In my experience, compatibility does not depend on ethnicity; instead it comes down to several things:

- Values
- Social status (income, profession, education, etc.)
- Expectations for the future
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Old 04-08-2012, 10:10 PM   #7
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i like my men black. and big. big black men. preferably multiple.

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Old 04-08-2012, 10:39 PM   #8
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Old 04-09-2012, 12:08 AM   #9
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I think it boils down to what the OP mentioned, which is whether or not it clicks.

I'm Asian; born in Asia but I've been here since I was 8. Do I love Asian culture? Sure, I love Asian culture (or certain aspects of it worth loving, I guess), but if I had to choose, I would identify myself as part of a separate, more distinctive Americanized/Canadianized Asian culture.

That being said, I've dating a noticeably Asian (both in her ethnicity and in her mannerisms) girl for over 2 years now. Sometimes her mannerisms and some of her ideological oddities piss the hell out of me, to the point where sometimes I'd just not talk to her about most things. But all in all, we get along just fine, because we click--those little things that only become important when you've been dating someone for a while (like responsiveness to intimacy, eating and hygiene habits, etc.).
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Old 04-09-2012, 09:32 AM   #10
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I like Asian girls, and I'm white. I know I follow the stereotype but hey, whatever.

I've found that the white girls I dated were crazy. Like legit off the wall crazy.
Plus there's something exotic about asian girls I enjoy.
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Old 04-09-2012, 11:37 AM   #11
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i can't stand asian girls, i turn to white girls as well
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whole time i thought gh0strider was white lol

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Old 04-09-2012, 12:19 PM   #12
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i can't stand asian girls, i turn to white girls as well
Us white girls are awesome well those of us who aren't the stuck up, money hungry bitches lol
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Old 04-09-2012, 04:29 PM   #13
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i can't stand asian girls, i turn to white girls as well
tha'ts because you are white Ghostrider.
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Old 04-09-2012, 10:09 PM   #14
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tha'ts because you are white Ghostrider.
Me and him traded races.
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Old 04-11-2012, 08:16 AM   #15
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I'm asian and love white girls. White girls FTW!
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Old 04-11-2012, 09:12 AM   #16
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white girls are more fun to hang out with but their values are very hit or miss
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Old 04-11-2012, 11:20 AM   #17
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I am CBC and dated exclusively whitel girls for the longest time. Then I got older and finally decided to try an asian girl. I went through 3-4 asians in a row and finally married the last one.

One thing I notice is that once you get out of school/university, it's much tougher to hook up with a white girl.
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Old 04-11-2012, 01:22 PM   #18
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i like my men black. and big. big black men. preferably multiple.

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Old 04-11-2012, 04:54 PM   #19
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Us white girls are awesome well those of us who aren't the stuck up, money hungry bitches lol
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Old 04-11-2012, 05:32 PM   #20
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Old 04-11-2012, 06:57 PM   #21
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^^^

youre using it in the wrong context
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Old 04-11-2012, 07:07 PM   #22
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i've went thru this before
white guy dates white girls
white girls dates white guys
white guys have asian fever
asian girls love white guys....
where the fuck does the asian guy come in....

i've had white girls who date asian guys cause 1) they have "better" family upbringing, 2) better family values, 3) not as often broke 4) not as much likely to be in debt 5) not likely to be a bum

again, i'm totally bias, but this came from a white girl that only wnated to date asian guys
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Old 04-11-2012, 07:38 PM   #23
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i've went thru this before
white guy dates white girls
white girls dates white guys
white guys have asian fever
asian girls love white guys....
where the fuck does the asian guy come in....

i've had white girls who date asian guys cause 1) they have "better" family upbringing, 2) better family values, 3) not as often broke 4) not as much likely to be in debt 5) not likely to be a bum

again, i'm totally bias, but this came from a white girl that only wnated to date asian guys
Honestly who cares about race if you and the other person are alike in morals, interests and everything else and are attracted to one another
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Old 04-14-2012, 10:22 PM   #24
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I'm Asian I dated an Asian girl for 8 years things didnt work out.

Now I'm engaged to a white girl and couldn't be happier
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Old 04-15-2012, 01:09 AM   #25
What hasn't Killed me, has made me more tolerant of RS!
 
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I'm Asian I dated an Asian girl for 8 years things didnt work out.

Now I'm engaged to a white girl and couldn't be happier
Your children will thank you one day.
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