so now my question is... how do you decide how much allowance to give her?

Not just childcare. It’s impossible to assign a value to the contributions a stay at home partner makes.

I’m in the same boat, with two sons aged 7 & 13. Wife quit her steady job a few years ago to raise the kids because the grandparents were getting older and busy with other younger grandkids. Her workplace was also becoming toxic so the stress was unhealthy for the whole family.

Over the course of the pandemic, I was so lucky to have her “at home”. When school was first cancelled, it wasn’t a big deal for us because she could keep the kids occupied. While I work from home, she takes kids to school and picks them up, gets groceries, runs errands, prepares meals, etc. Doctor or dentist appointments? No problem. Kid feeling unwell? No problem. How could we fit all of that in if both of us worked full time?

She’s started thinking of going back to work, but the selfish part of me isn’t ready for that yet. The bonus is that she gets to spend more time with the boys and watch them grow up. Maybe when the younger one is in high school...

Wow, stayed out of this thread for many reasons.

My wife stayed home since day one. She looked after the three kids. She knew more about education than most, if not all, teachers out there. She researched everything. Anyway, I worked and left all the money stuff to her. She was amazing at saving money. We both decided it was the best thing. You can't put the safety and well being of the kids above all else. I got the better part of the bargain. I worked my ass off while she looked after everything else. Her job was, by far, the hardest.

It was tough at times, like when mortgage rates were at 16%. Ouch. It hurts just thinking about it. But we managed on a single income and looking at how my children turned out, I couldn't be happier. My eldest son makes way more than I ever did and the other two are doing fine. They're all 30+. If you can manage it somehow, do it. Raise those kids yourselves. Okay, maybe not. I've seen some scary parenting in my day. Those parents who are into themselves............... nuff said.

I know, I know, times are different.

https://www.rew.ca/properties/338333...-vancouver-bc#

Once you see the massive curb appeal due to the sweet ass 3rd gen convertible Camaro in the back you'll know someone will pay $500k over asking.

period-correct, sorta

Exactly. Again, I’ll point out it was a mutual decision and one I don’t regret. For the record, I do the majority of the cooking. I enjoy it.

Allowance? Lol.. no. I don’t monitor her spend. She does her thing and is reasonable about it. Never had any real issues there.

I think this is the key thing. Unless you have fuck you money, get into a relationship with someone who's reasonable with their finances. Whether it's a joint account or separate accounts matters little.

House probably smells like 2nd hand smoke and bbq.

You say that like it's a bad thing but that's 2 of the 4 things you need to guarantee that there's good roast duck and cha siu in there. https://twitter.com/Fumi_chun/status...355591170?s=20

Do your wives only have part-time jobs? or are you guys just casually pulling in $200k+???

If the latter... DAMNNNN. Congrats to you three.

My friend just bought a van. special for $1.7M and he thought he overpaid... I guess i'll send him this listing.

edit. just saw the lot size. 40'x91'... not a fan of these types of lots.

Did you forget you're on revscene? Everyone makes 200k+

Based on my uneducated observations, the market has slowed down a bit and lots of properties that aren't moving. The asking prices are lagging behind. I'd be surprised if that sells.

Honestly.... a 50yr old Van special that's only under standard lot... And they want 1.8m? I thought we paid "market" but damn I got a smoking ass deal on our house.

They said 80%. If they make 100k, wife then makes 80k. The discrepancy isn't THAT big. My wife makes ~65% of what I make, but she left money on the table for flexibility.

But that flexibility has been shit lately. She's questioning whether if she's not gotten the bargain she wanted and should go look for a 20-30k raise with a new job.

^ wow. That was a FAIL.

I'm going to blame the heat...

I completely read those comments wrong...

But that Camaro...

I'd say that it's stopped rising with a few outliers like 849 Durward in East Van:

Style of House 2 Storey w/Bsmt.
Bedrooms 3
Bathrooms 3
Listing Date 2021-May-25
Sold Date 2021-May-31
Sale Reported Date 2021-Jun-01
Days on Market 6
Sold Price $2,499,000
Asking Price (Final) $2,499,000
Asking Price (Original) $2,499,000
Size of House 2,200 sqft
Price per SqFt $1,136
Basement Full, Fully Finished
Lot Size 0.08 ac
Lot Frontage 33 ft
Lot Depth/Size 112.15 ft
Age of House 108 years old

108 year old house that's only 2,200sf going for what was new build money just a few months ago. Crazy.

That place is exactly the same layout as mine, 110 years old

While not as crazy as 1-2 months ago, I still find myself raising an eyebrow at some of these sales:

https://i.imgur.com/kivK9oB.png

Assessed value $1.279M. I know it's a long lot, but still...

EDIT: Maybe priced with the assumption of rezoning in the Joyce-Collingwood Precinct Plan.

Yep, it's going to get rezoned for townhouses per the neighbourhood plan: https://vancouver.ca/files/cov/joyce...cinct-plan.pdf

Page 21 - marked yellow. Knowing that it's actually kinda low.

Ah, that makes more sense. If all the planned densification goes through, the Joyce area sure is going to change in the next 5 years. Although I still find myself surprised that they didn’t go wider with the rezoned area.

Traffic already sucks shit there. If they aren't widening the roads it's going to be absolutely terrific....

great input from everyone who chimed in about the income/expenses as couples. Seems like the majority have a joint account for bills and the rest is for their own personal use in their own accounts. I find it's better that way IMO.

For the ones that survive off a single income while the wife stays home to take care of the kids, that's some tough ass shit because I sure as hell couldn't commit to that lol

My wife is on mat leave for another three months and she's dreading going back to work, not because she doesn't like her work, she actually loves her job, but she doesn't want to be away from our little guy.

She can actually extend her mat leave for an additional six months (unpaid), so we're actually considering that because she loves spending time with our little man.

The big issue is the not getting paid. Even the regular mat leave EI benefit is not enough, so going without her income for an additional six months will be rough, but I feel like it's worth it to be home with the guy =/

Dang, I know the Joyce station area can be lucrative with density, I remember last year when you could find a tear down for $1.2M.

I guess that's no longer possible.

IMO, the more important question is -- how is the little guy going to be cared for if your wife returns to work?

If you are relying on grandparents, that comes with the usual pros and cons, and only you and your wife can decide how good or bad the arrangement is.

If you are sending the little person out for daycare, first of all, do you already have a place arranged? Childcare for those under 2.5 yrs old was exceedingly difficult to find pre-pandemic. It could be a lot easier now, but it is still going to cost a pretty penny. The question would then become:

1) does your wife's salary justify the cost of daycare?
2) does your wife's salary justify the loss of their bonding time and watching the little person grow?

How does mat leave pay work? I know my wife said she gets a certain % from her work during the first 3 months. Then what? Does she transition to EI from the government after that?

With the cost of housing and the general cost of living continuing to go up, I get scared shitless of thinking about how we would manage.

We want to upgrade from our 1 bedroom + den in the next few years, but may have a kid first and wait it out in our place. Everyone tells me you can make do until they are about 2 years old and then they need their own bedroom.