A rant on Pink Shirt Day

[Inaii]

Originally Posted by SkinnyPupp

Haven't heard about this until now, but I agree it's just as stupid as earth hour and "boycotting" gas stations for a day.

Raising awareness against bullying is not a bad thing, but to really get to the heart of the matter, you need to get these kids dads to stop beating them up.

I disagree with this. I know people who were beat by their parents on a daily basis who were the nicest people I've ever hung out with. And a lot of the "bullies" in my high school were kids with great home lives. So to say that all bullies are "beat by their dads" is very generalized and most likely very inaccurate. And yes I'm aware that environment usually plays a big factor in how people turn out, but it could be something as simple as the kids get whatever they want so they figure, hey why not.

[Gridlock]

Originally Posted by Soundy

Oh, and by the way... I'm sick of hearing about how the worst form is "cyber bullying". You know what? THIS IS THE EASIEST TYPE TO AVOID. Facebook has a "Block" function. So does Twitter. You have filters in your email - you can bitbucket anything a person sends you without ever seeing it. Got a smartphone? There are all kinds of apps to block calls and texts from certain numbers. Take a little PERSONAL RESPONSIBILITY and you can shut it out all by yourself. It's the modern way of simply turning your back on a bully and just walking away... except it's a lot harder for them to follow you!

I somewhat disagree with this.

For example: joining a local forum, participating in discussions, becoming a member of the forum fb group, having another member find you....creep your facebook page, copy the photos and personal information, and posting all your personal information, your job, a bullshit story, and photo up on The Dirty for no good reason and for the world to see.

A little hard to avoid that. Guess you could have never joined the forum in the first place.

[VRYALT3R3D]

Originally Posted by Gridlock

I somewhat disagree with this.

For example: joining a local forum, participating in discussions, becoming a member of the forum fb group, having another member find you....creep your facebook page, copy the photos and personal information, and posting all your personal information, your job, a bullshit story, and photo up on The Dirty for no good reason and for the world to see.

A little hard to avoid that. Guess you could have never joined the forum in the first place.

You can avoid it -- Don't post anything on the internet that you don't want anyone else to see!
I do it, works well.

[Akinari]

Woooord. I didn't see a single person at UBC wearing pink must be too mainstream for us. I knew it was pink shirt day but I wore blue

[Gridlock]

Originally Posted by VRYALT3R3D

You can avoid it -- Don't post anything on the internet that you don't want anyone else to see!
I do it, works well.

It is not about the personal information, it is about the lies.

[VRYALT3R3D]

Originally Posted by Gridlock

It is not about the personal information, it is about the lies.

Then don't draw attention to the lie, blow it off, and don't put fuel in the fire and allow them to provoke a response from you.

A friend of mine was a member of some hacking forum and got DOX'd, and it was pretty complete and really thorough. The guy threatened him that he is going to post it all over the internet. He even blackmailed him in making a photo for him doing something embarrassing.

My friend asked me what to do and I told him ignore him and blow it off. It worked. I also told him to watch what he posts lol

[Soundy]

Originally Posted by VRYALT3R3D

You can avoid it -- Don't post anything on the internet that you don't want anyone else to see!
I do it, works well.

Bingo. Or if you do post stuff to your FB, lock down your account so non-friends can't see it. Don't post links to your FB in your forum profile. It's real easy to protect yourself from ever getting into this position in the first place if you just take a little initiative.

[BrRsn]

just the pussification of the race as we know it, going further and further.

look at any other animal, the weak die, the strong stay strong and as a result the entire herd benefits. People used to get sick and die, so healthcare and science evolved over the years -- now diseases that were lethal 20-30 years ago, are treated with a vaccination and are curable. If a family member or close friend is effected, that's great news. If any problem arises, we EXPECT an answer -- whether it be from science, or god.

I'm not saying prevention of bullying is wrong, but we're so used to having a solution for every problem that when a problem arises with no clear solution, we play the victim. We sit in our woe and self pity, let the sadness perpetuate, say we have depression, yadda yadda yadda. Whatever happened to 'toughen the fuck up' and deal with it? The world is a nasty place, you would think it'd be beneficial to kids to learn that quickly.

I used to get bullied all the time in school as a kid -- I was the fat kid, I had a turban, and I was in the gifted program for a few years. I even remember a few teachers throwing pretty hurtful insults at me. I survived just fine. Hell, if I didn't learn to deal with bullies, I would've probably flunked out of university after the second semester. I've seen the way people treat me/my opinions just because of the color my skin and how I dress -- isn't that bullying? Is there a colored shirt that'll fix that?

Wearing a pink t-shirt doesn't help. You can't wear a t-shirt to overcome natural human instinct -- everyone's in a competition with everyone -- given the right circumstances, you WILL step on your best friend to get ahead. Whether it's attacking someone to look cool infront of your friends, or stealing their lunch money to feed yourself -- that's human nature. You cannot stop that.

Bullying is everywhere, look at adults. You would think we, the 'adult population', would have learned bullying is detrimental. You would think we would have learned to accept others -- but that's not the case. Walk down the street, see a smoker, the average person acts like the smoker is a fucking leper. Inhaling second hand smoke for a split second won't kill you, yet we're all quick to shoot them the evil eye or even vocalize our opinions -- why? because we fucking love confrontation. We love feeling superior to others.

As long as every human being is a unique being, there will be differences and differences will lead to confrontation. We are all instinctively aware of those around us, we all know who is 'better' and who is 'worse' and if you say otherwise you're lying.

Anyways, tl;dr, this shit is stupid
bullying is a natural part of life
learn to deal with it or live the rest of your life scared of the world

[RRxtar]

^^The thank button doesnt come close to what that post deserves.

Every single species of living creature on earth competes with itself. It is a deep seeded code in everything's DNA to pro-create and by that nature, everything wants to be the alpha of its group to be the most desirable mate. 99.99% of everything on earth with a heartbeat strives to be the top dog.

Buffalo ram heads together, wolves fight, and humans bully. We all read stories in elementary school science about hierarchy in the animal kingdom. For about a billion years of life on earth, the strong survive, the strongest thrive, and the weak die. It has only been in the last couple hundred years where humans have gone significantly out of their way to bring along the weak.

So the problem with bullying, usually, isn't the bully, it is the victim. Years of your brother getting in trouble if he beat you up, you mom sticking up for you in the playground if another kid stole your toy, and your parents bailing you out of bad situations has pussified most kids. The way to fix bullying is to give the kid whos going to be the victim a chance. Toughen him up by making him a little man, give him a peer group by putting him in several sports. Most kids who are in a group of friends don't get bullied, it is the loners who do. When a kid's team mates stick up for him, it shows the bully the kid might have cool friends and maybe isnt such a loser. Give your kid an opportunity to have something 'cool' about him.

I was the same way when I was a kid, a little bitch, and while I was never 'that kid', I did get bullied a bit because of it. Once I grew up abit and realized I was a bitch and put effort into manning the fuck up, every single part of my life improved.

[quasi]

I have to disagree with the original post to a point. I have a 6 and 7 year old in school. They are both far more aware of what bullying is, how it's wrong and that they shouldn't participate far more then I ever remember growing up. The pink shirt is just a part of that, the education to young children especially I think is so beneficial. Things like the pink shirt day get kids talking about it in class, they never did that when I was growing up. Bullying in high school is way more prevelent then it is in elementary. The shirts won't end bullying but it has created great awareness and I think where we'll see the change is down the road as the little kids like the 6 and 7 year olds I have at home grow and hit highschool.

[?uestlove]

Has this pink shirt thing actually stopped/reduced bullying? I doubt it but I haven't been to school or a playground in awhile so I don't know
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[Tapioca]

I was bullied in elementary and in high school. I survived and learned about myself in the process. Mind you, I basically won every award that was available in elementary and high school, so there was a reason why I was bullied. Some of the people who bullied me are probably still assholes in adulthood, while others probably fell along the wayside. What matters is that I went through it and built some character in the process.

Bullying happens in the adult world more than we would like to think. Kids these days are too soft. It's unfortunate that some kids can't cope with it, but lessons learned in childhood provide the foundation for the hard choices and challenges in adulthood.
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[Everymans]

Originally Posted by Tapioca

I was bullied in elementary and in high school. I survived and learned about myself in the process. Mind you, I basically won every award that was available in elementary and high school, so there was a reason why I was bullied. Some of the people who bullied me are probably still assholes in adulthood, while others probably fell along the wayside. What matters is that I went through it and built some character in the process.

Bullying happens in the adult world more than we would like to think. Kids these days are too soft. It's unfortunate that some kids can't cope with it, but lessons learned in childhood provide the foundation for the hard choices and challenges in adulthood.
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There should be a level of tolerance expected when it comes to bullying. I was with my 13 year old cousin playing street hockey with some of his other friends and a few of their friends. one of the kids called another kid a shitty player because he couldn't pass. One of the fathers got all up in arms about the kid calling him a shitty player and that it hurt his feelings and the kid was a bully etc.. I didn't say anything, but honestly I thought it was pathetic. The kid was shitty and he needed to be told so, even if it was on the nose and slightly harsh. That kid will doubtfully ever strive to get better now because he's being babied along by this low level of tolerance for harsh criticisms.

Where is the line? What should we tolerate and what shouldn't we tolerate? I say harsh stuff to people all the time and apparently some people might consider it bullying, I consider it aggressive criticism.

This pink shirt day is good for the kids though. We can't be quiet about being bullied, or being a bully forever. But the level of tolerance is way to low for this stuff. Especially internet bullying. Someone already mentioned it, but if your having a hard time because of someone calling you names OVER THE INTERNET, then shut the god damn thing off. That's a level of tolerance that i'll never support. But on the other hand, not everyone is the same. Some people have a high tolerance for some things and weak spots for others.

[OTG-ZR2]

Originally Posted by SkinnyPupp

Haven't heard about this until now, but I agree it's just as stupid as earth hour and "boycotting" gas stations for a day.

Raising awareness against bullying is not a bad thing, but to really get to the heart of the matter, you need to get these kids dads to stop beating them up.

That was very distasteful. Not every one had a privilege of growing up with a father.

[MG1]

Originally Posted by Everymans

The kid was shitty and he needed to be told so, even if it was on the nose and slightly harsh. That kid will doubtfully ever strive to get better now because he's being babied along by this low level of tolerance for harsh criticisms.

Truth of the matter is, the parent was more butthurt than the kid.

Sad........just let the kids play. And, what's with the parents being there in the first place? Back in my day, kids (we) organized our own games and we all learned to get along with each other. Nobody bullied anyone or pulled any dumb stunts, because if you did, nobody invited you to play ever again. Parents need to keep their distance. Shit has a way of working out by themselves. Kids are a lot more resourceful than we give them credit for............ well, not sure if kids nowadays have any skills. I think we took that ability (for lack of a better word) away from them.

[Ulic Qel-Droma]

lol, bullying. c'mon.

governments still bully other governments... it's built in us. we are war machines.

to be alpha, you have to instill fear in your enemies, and have your followers embrace you in love.

if you can't do either, you're at the bottom of the barrel. cuz someone's gonna do it to you.

yeah...

so one time this bully was using the radial saw, this kid fucking pushed him real hard into it. he didnt get cut, but the fear in his eyes.. he never fucked with that kid again. he could have, but he's smarter than that, cuz he knows he has to use that radial saw again.

another guy destroyed this kids car tires. and when he got new ones, they just destroyed it again.

in swimming class this guy got fed up and took a big breath then jumped on a guy in the pool and wouldnt let go till he himself almost ran out of breath.

another person covered the persons house in like.. cartons and cartons of eggs. and left a letter for his parents from an anonymous stand point. oh also epoxying all their locks.

another thing is .. usually bullys are shitty at school already. you just double lock their lockers, and they cant get their books and show up late for class or whatever. teachers dont believe them. they get in more trouble lol.

everyone's good at something.

you can use that something negatively, and apply it to the bully.

all you have to do is turn that passion into pure hate, and target the person you hate.

most bullys bully for fun or to feel alpha, not because they HATE you.

but if they see the passion you have for hating them, and you're aggressive and vicious as fuck when you fight or attack them (in whatever way)... they'll back off. im talking about vicious. you're bloodied up and you're still going berserk and nuts and you'll bite, claw anything like a fucking rabid animal.

it WILL scare them. they feed off your fear and your submissiveness.
i have to say this part again... they FEED OFF HOW SUBMISSIVE YOU ARE. the more you run the more they'll want to chase.

you just have to be a little creative, and since most of the physical bullying happens in elementary and highschool usually... and usually everyone knows where everyone else lives...

you can get them back in many ways.

all you need are a few friends that like to get people back... or do it yourself.

everyone has a weakness. you just have to watch. you have to hit them where their pride is. they have to feel embarrassed. defeated. if not you can always hit their home.

they're kids remember... usually the bully doesn't know what it's like to be on the other side... as soon as they realise what it's like to be on the other side they'll learn. you can only learn through PAIN.

especially kids. they have to know what it's like to be in the shoes of the others.

i've seen bullys turn around... after they get drawn through long torturous process of their own parents starting to bully them when they realise what their kid has been up to.

you have to instill fear in them.

i say this again... you have to instill FEAR. the horror of facing death. only then will they know not to fuck with you anymore. doesn't matter if you're a little skinny ass kid or whatever. once you instill fear in them, they'll never look at you the same way again. or even have the guts to come up to you and apologize. trust me... they don't want to die.

Originally Posted by Gridlock

I somewhat disagree with this.

For example: joining a local forum, participating in discussions, becoming a member of the forum fb group, having another member find you....creep your facebook page, copy the photos and personal information, and posting all your personal information, your job, a bullshit story, and photo up on The Dirty for no good reason and for the world to see.

A little hard to avoid that. Guess you could have never joined the forum in the first place.

listen... the only reason that happens is because of the lack of the ability to get people to love you.

if you operate from a selfish stand point, you dont give a fuck what other people think, and you don't care to notice or cater to people when more and more people are AGAINST you.. that will happen in ANY situation, cyber or not.

you have to remember, people care. about everything. it doesn't matter whether you care or not.
if you don't care, and you start attacking people that do care. what the fuck do you think will happen? you'll make more and more enemies. when you make enemies... typically enemies want to hurt you.

you have to be in tune with other peoples feelings and what other people want. you have to know how they feel, and you have to care.

if you don't care, don't say anything unless you know how to balance it so that they'll understand your point of view.

it's always a balancing act when you speak your mind.

if you blab out whatever you want and dont give a shit about others and state that (whether in tone of voice or not)... people will hate you. people will want to hurt you.

you have to care. if it's too tiring... then don't speak your mind. those are the rules of living in society.

the more you care, the more people will care about you. your team will be stronger.

lol sounds a lot like bullying right? society is built on bullying

social circles, corporations, governments. everything.


you have to care. because someone else, potentially more dangerous than you are, will.

[spideyv2]

Dhillon and rrxtar nailed it

Good job men
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[TheKingdom2000]

It's better than nothing OP...
This day is such an easy way to raise awareness.
If this day enlightens even ONE bully to take it easy or stop bullying then this day has worked.

I get what you're saying, but Rome wasn't built in a day. And hating on a day that tries to address the issue should be celebrated, not hated on.

I'm sorry you got bullied, but I think this is step in the right direction.

[MG1]

Originally Posted by RRxtar

Buffalo ram heads together, wolves fight, and humans bully. We all read stories in elementary school science about hierarchy in the animal kingdom. For about a billion years of life on earth, the strong survive, the strongest thrive, and the weak die. It has only been in the last couple hundred years where humans have gone significantly out of their way to bring along the weak.

Except, humans have the ability to think......... the weak?

Einstein was pretty frail guy. So were a lot of scientists, artists, musicians, etc. We need these "gifted" people.

The pen is mightier than the sword. If we went back to the days of beating the weak and go Nazi, we would not be where we are.

I enjoy celebrating everyone for who they are, because it makes this god forsaken planet liveable. Just presenting it from a different view.

In my preteen days, I was a pretty frail guy. When I grew up, I was a bit of a bully. Went the alpha route. Since then, I have realized it's dumb and..........

.......anyway, getting a headache from thinking too much right now. RS is supposed to be relaxing, LOL.


BTW, I regret being a bully. To this day, I feel bad for the shit I did to others. When you grow up in a "fuck or get fucked neighbourhood", you tend to go to the dark side. Thank god I changed. Didn't find god or anything like that........ just woke up one day and and realized it's just wrong.


Perhaps if there were pink shirts back then, I may have changed earlier...........

[Ulic Qel-Droma]

lol a funny example comes to mind.

i was young... grade 3, anyway... we were just little kids.

every recess we'd play soccer between two storage containers (using the containers as "goals").

all the kids would line up and two leaders would pick who was on their team.

there was a kid that was more quiet, kinda... got pushed around, told to shut up whenever he had something to say. but never anything really bad. cuz we're just... grade 3.

but there was one kid... one of the "leader" kids that especially liked to always be leader, always be right, and shut everyone up around him. he especially liked to target the quiet kid. just waiting for him to speak or something and then like telling him to shut up. or making fun of what he was eating for lunch.. or whatever.

i was always very observant. i wasn't friends with either. but i didn't like the way things were being run.

i would see the kid sometimes just... like sitting on the side of the playground alone... drawing stuff in the dirt with a stick or something. just being alone. i felt sorry for him. i don't know how he felt. but i knew how i felt. and i knew how i felt about the bully.

one recess i forgot what happened... but this kid told one of my buddies to shut up.

the bully had this stupid action figure he'd often bring and show off and play with.

one lunch break, i "broke" into our classroom (there were two entrances, and the back was unlocked if you went through another class). and i ripped that toy in as many peices as i could. and used a scissor to scar it up, and i left it where i found it.

to see that bully, come back and see his eyes widen. and shock... and just the tears running down his face.. distinctly remember him looking around quickly, paranoid to see if anyone was watching him... of course no one else knew how this happened. only i did. and of course i was the only one watching him. but he didn't know.

the teacher even made a big deal out of it. asking everyone who did it... that nothing would happen, that all we'd have to do is apologize.

i was a good kid. no one would ever suspect me.

i remember his mom picking him up, and all he could do was bury his face in his mothers jacket, teary eyed holding a broken action figure.

he didn't need to know who did it. his ego was cut. he wasn't leader for soccer anymore.

soon his ego grew back... he lashed out against someone else, i'd cleverly cut in at the right time, and remind him maybe his toy wouldn't be destroyed if he were nicer.

his eyes would widen and he'd come to realisation to as why things were happening the way they were.

lol, grade 3 kids can be sly and manipulative as shit.

7-8 years later, i let that kid that got bullied know what happened that day. lol "OMG THAT WAS YOU?! HAHAHA!!!"

he let me cheat off every final and provincial. long term investment. lol 90%... no studying needed.

a little can go a long way

lol i'll never forget that event. Too bad I don't know where either of them are now.


as you can tell i'm very against the path of ignoring and being passive. if someone's not gonna do it, i'll do it, and i wont even have anything to do with the situation.

[Sid Vicious]

we need to make a difference between "constructive" bullying and just plain douchebaggery.

for example, constructive bullying involves making fun of kids that are fat, or dumb. these kids (ostensibly) will be motivated to lose weight, or to learn as to not get bullied anymore, which will ultimately benefit them...so its constructive

[BrRsn]

Originally Posted by MG1

Except, humans have the ability to think......... the weak?

Einstein was pretty frail guy. So were a lot of scientists, artists, musicians, etc. We need these "gifted" people.

The pen is mightier than the sword. If we went back to the days of beating the weak and go Nazi, we would not be where we are.

I enjoy celebrating everyone for who they are, because it makes this god forsaken planet liveable. Just presenting it from a different view.

In my preteen days, I was a pretty frail guy. When I grew up, I was a bit of a bully. Went the alpha route. Since then, I have realized it's dumb and..........

.......anyway, getting a headache from thinking too much right now. RS is supposed to be relaxing, LOL.

I respect what you're saying -- our ability to think makes us different from every other animal, yes. One no longer needs to be able to fend for their life in a physical sense to be successful (look at justin bieber). But at the end of the day, we are still animals, we are still slaves to instinct. I always used to wonder why every religion has a universality in what it tries to control -- they're all instincts.

Bullying was never just fights, it was name calling, exclusion, and lots of other passive aggressive behaviours. Dealing with bullying on your own allows your personality to become calloused and for you to grow 'thick skin'. You might wonder why an 9 or 11 year old needs thick skin, life is hunky dory with 2 parents, food on the table, and no bills to worry about.


Fast forward 10 years and that same child is carrying student loans, dealing with a relationship, working full time, trying to maintain marks to keep their placement in the university ... and a tragedy happens. What now? If you've been babied all your life, you crawl into a hole and cry. Give up on life, try to throw it all away. End up working 40 hours a week paying off the loans at a job you hate.

Physical strength is easy to get, spiritual strength is part of maturing into a functioning adult with the ability to be knocked down, face set backs and still persevere. That's all that separates the successful from the unsuccessful. I won't intervene in my kids lives when it comes to bullying, just as my parents didn't.

[MG1]

Originally Posted by Sid Vicious

we need to make a difference between "constructive" bullying and just plain douchebaggery.

for example, constructive bullying involves making fun of kids that are fat, or dumb. these kids (ostensibly) will be motivated to lose weight, or to learn as to not get bullied anymore, which will ultimately benefit them...so its constructive

I didn't know dumb could be fixed, LOLOLOLOLOL.

[Ulic Qel-Droma]

Originally Posted by Sid Vicious

we need to make a difference between "constructive" bullying and just plain douchebaggery.

for example, constructive bullying involves making fun of kids that are fat, or dumb. these kids (ostensibly) will be motivated to lose weight, or to learn as to not get bullied anymore, which will ultimately benefit them...so its constructive

... lol are you kidding me.

when a bully makes fun of a fat kid, he doesn't care whether or not this kid becomes skinny or not. he's targeting him because he's an easy target.

if someone's lower on the social ladder than you, and they're lower because of YOU... you're automatically alpha to him. and you'll be admired be other people that want to be alpha.

it's not constructive at all. the same people making fun of the fat kid, could be making fun of a skinny kid.

[Sid Vicious]

Originally Posted by Ulic Qel-Droma

... lol are you kidding me.

when a bully makes fun of a fat kid, he doesn't care whether or not this kid becomes skinny or not. he's targeting him because he's an easy target.

if someone's lower on the social ladder than you, and they're lower because of YOU... you're automatically alpha to him. and you'll be admired be other people that want to be alpha.

it's not constructive at all. the same people making fun of the fat kid, could be making fun of a skinny kid.

obviously the bully doesnt care. but certain types of bullying induce in certain behaviors which are ultimately constructive for the person being bullied. (fighting back, losing weight, educating oneself)