Saying grace/prayers in large public events inappropriate?

[Hondaracer]

What do you think?

I was at a large golf tournament a few weeks back for a construction supply company and after the tournament they introduced a man who was a beneficiary of some of the money raised, the man in charge of the whole thing then asked everyone to follow him in a prayer and saying grace before the dinner

I'm about as atheist as they come and wanted no part, so being reasonably polite i sat there through the whole thing, id say about 30-40% of people may have hung their heads in prayer yadayadya

at the end a few women at another table kind of gave me a stink eye, dont know if it was cause i didn't hang my head or refused to say "amen" or what but i felt insulted that i would be looked upon like that and in the end i felt the whole situation was pretty ignorant on the part of the hosts..

considering the whole party of about 120-165 people were made up of a huge mix of ethnicity's, backgrounds, etc. I felt it was completely inappropriate to have such a prayer especially considering this event was completely unrelated ..

[AAnthony]

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[MG1]

I was at Eagle Motorplex in Ashcroft a few weeks back. It was a big IHRA event. Mid day, they stop for lunch, but just before that, the announcer starts to go into prayer. After that, they play the Stars and Stripes. All the racers were then invited to the church service at the track the following morning (Sunday). It was like going back 60 years, where children in public schools recited the lord's prayer in class, read passages from the bible, and sang, "Jesus Loves Me." And yes, I remember to this day, every word of the songs I was forced to sing in public school. Thank god (no pun intended) they don't make kids do that brainwashing shit anymore.

Not to worry, I had strong enough of a mind, even at that age, to not let that stuff affect me. Funny thing was, my parents didn't give two shits about it. It was considered normal back then.

[MG1]

Originally Posted by AAnthony

Remember, the Catholic/Christian way is not about respecting others beliefs. It's about trying to change and convert people because they're worshiping "false idols". A false idol, according to them is a god other than their own, if you worship one, afraid it's eternal damnation.

Yup, it's their duty to save everyone from damnation. They are right and everything/everyone else is wrong.

A good friend and coworker of mine, a born again himself, once told me he loved me and jesus/god loved me - he wanted to save me from living in total darkness. As a Buddhist, I am in hell already. Trying to leave it, thank-you.

god bless him, though, I guess he was kind of right.

[Yodamaster]

Is it inappropriate? No, people can do what they want within reason.

Is it inappropriate to exclude or scoff at people who choose not to engage in prayer at a public event? Yes.


Everyone around me in a skytrain car could break out into prayer, and I wouldn't really care unless they verbally or physically abused and/or humiliated me for not joining them.

[4444]

If its a host, or a guest of a host, or someone well respected, or whatever, give them the 2 mins of respect, look down, ride it out (as you did).

The stink eyed cunt, she may think she's going to heaven in a first class ride, but I'm sure if there's a god, he'd have a sense of humour and would send her to eternal damnation (I'm full atheist too, don't read the above as religious blabbering)

[stewie]

I don't think its inappropriate at all.

for those there who accepted the prayer, let them...for those who don't believe in that stuff, just keep your head up, stay silent for the 30 seconds to let them do their thing and just have respect for them in general.

im catholic, don't go to church that often anymore, still wear my necklace with my cross, cornicello, baptism pendant, and my first communion pendant. I don't think ive ever voluntarily said a prayer before a meal, but at evey family function I go to, they all say it. sure ill say it with them, but my girlfriend wont, my brothers gf wont, and half the other guys there wont either...nobody cares...its no big deal.

theres a lot of shit people do that I don't believe in or take part in, but if im with them in a group, i'll just let them do their thing without questioning them.

[parm104]

I really don't see the big deal. I feel as though people complicate things by making trivial incidents into complicated issues. (Not saying that OP is, just a general observation.) If I was at a say event where the coordinators decided to have someone pray and say grace before eating, I would take that opportunity to do just that. It doesn't mean that you have to accept J.C. or that you have to believe in God. One can still be thankful without having to tribute it to a "Higher Power."

Having religion around you should not be offensive and if someone practices their beliefs in a non-obtrusive way, it shouldn't be regarded as disrespectful. If however, you are forced or compelled/pressured to partake in the same manner as those who are practising their beliefs, then I would be offended.

[rsx]

I've been in the same situations with company functions, personally, it's offensive since I attended a work function NOT a religious one. Though, I am respectful. I don't get up and leave or make a scene, but I don't hang my head and close my eyes. I just sit there. I've been glared at several times, and to be honest, it's fucking annoying.

[Hondaracer]

I dont really care about the people looking down on me, if you want to get into some sort of argument over it i'm going to be making a scene..

i think its just pretty insensitive to other religions especially when looking at the room the amount of different races attending the event almost certainly are of a different religion if they are affiliated with one

[dinosaur]

I'm with hondaracer here...I think it is totally inappropriate to bring religion into such a random event.

There are certain things in life you don't discuss with semi-random people...religion is one of them. I would have found it incredibly rude to have religion brought to a non-religious event. What does prayer and golf have to do with one another. This is probably the last place you would expect to have this happen.

I think this was a hugely selfish move. You don't need to cause a stink or anything but kudos for not bowing your head and saying "amen" at the end. Never be a sheep.

[Great68]

Originally Posted by AAnthony

Remember, the Catholic/Christian way is not about respecting others beliefs. It's about trying to change and convert people because they're worshiping "false idols". A false idol, according to them is a god other than their own, if you worship one, afraid it's eternal damnation.

I think Religion's a sham, and I hate it.

And I was raised catholic, baptised & confirmed.

But I have to at least say in those many years have I have never known anyone in the church actively try to convert anyone else, or call any other religion a false god and play the eternal damnation card.

You sound a little ignorant.

[sdubfid]

whats that saying? religions like your wiener, don't whip it out in public

doesn't really bother me if its optional participation but those people giving you the stink eye, you should knock on their door at 7am to join hondabrahs witness

unrelated: who pays for churches? I've seen some pretty pimp churches that would cost millions built recently

[SkinnyPupp]

Originally Posted by Great68

I think Religion's a sham, and I hate it.

And I was raised catholic, baptised & confirmed.

But I have to at least say in those many years have I have never known anyone in the church actively try to convert anyone else, or call any other religion a false god and play the eternal damnation card.

You sound a little ignorant.

I do't think it was completely ignorant, in that some people handle that 'portion' of the religion differently.

Most see it as they are helping the people they care about, if they are able to convert them to religion. MOST will not continue to try over and over, but in my experience it almost always comes up at least once. The good people will respect you if you turn them down, the annoying ones will keep at it. That's a good way to determine who the true friends are.

[teekaywok]

Every time I hear a prayer, I just think of this

Spoiler!

[will068]

Catholic church goer here

You have enough respect to just be quiet. If those women were indeed smart eyeing you while you were quiet minding you're own business, they're idiots.

[BrRsn]

I don't know about you guys, but with all the global disasters lately I think I'll take all the prayer I can get. I want to be saved if theres an apocalypse. I wont be with you naysayers.

[murd0c]

I personally respect people's beliefs until they are forced upon me, in this situation you did the right thing but if I had a women like that give me a stink eye I would just smile and give her a little wink
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[Ulic Qel-Droma]

Originally Posted by MG1

As a Buddhist, I am in hell already.

yes, we are already in hell. but there are still, even more hellish realities in existence, compared to ours.

[GLOW]

i'd say the only thing inappropriate was that you got the stink eye from those women.
you sat quietly and politely to let them do their thing. if the stink eye was for your lack of participation then it was completely inappropriate on their part.

[Gridlock]

People get too worked up over this stuff.

People have different beliefs. Those that follow the religious path don't feel a need to keep it to themselves. I kind of don't blame them. The people that get upset by it aren't the ones they are going to hang out with anyway-well, in an "eternity" kind of way.

The ladies that you perceived to give you the stink eye-just ignore them. I'm sure its not the first time they've been around someone that wasn't drinking their kool-aid, and it won't be the last.

[a00755836]

Originally Posted by murd0c

I personally respect people's beliefs until they are forced upon me, in this situation you did the right thing but if I had a women like that give me a stink eye I would just smile and give her a little wink
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[tiger_handheld]

Originally Posted by stewie

I don't think its inappropriate at all.

for those there who accepted the prayer, let them...for those who don't believe in that stuff, just keep your head up, stay silent for the 30 seconds to let them do their thing and just have respect for them in general.

+1 for above.

you mentioned prayer was led by the person in charge of the event and as host, I think they can do whatever they feel because as you said '' they are in charge'

if you really want no part in it, put your head down as a sign of respect as many have suggested.

[dinosaur]

Originally Posted by tiger_handheld

if you really want no part in it, put your head down as a sign of respect as many have suggested.

wouldn't "putting your head down" be considered "taking part"?

where was the respect for non-religious people?

dude was blindsided by this...especially considering it was work related.

[gars]

Originally Posted by dinosaur

wouldn't "putting your head down" be considered "taking part"?

where was the respect for non-religious people?

dude was blindsided by this...especially considering it was work related.

I think he meant keep your head down as opposed to looking up and around. I had a very good friend who was religious, and would say grace silently before we have dinner together. I, out of respect, would keep my head down and keep quiet while she did it.

The military still have grace before dinner - it's a tradition before any mess dinner - though I think the padres know to not include god in it - they just thank each other, etc - almost like saying thanks before eating thanksgiving dinner - and you don't have to say Amen with everyone else at the end of grace if you don't want to. I don't really see a problem with that.