If people want to genuinely hang out with you, they'll put effort in to make time for you (note that I used the word make). If they forget once, it's alright, but more than once, then I would be careful.

Those that make up excuses all the time are simply prioritizing other things over you, and that type of friendship is unhealthy.

isnt that why we joined revscene?

Sounds like OP is phaggot.

I gave up on caring after a while. I realize that you just have to accept reality that these people do exist. These people just tend to do this by nature, they accept an invitation and gives you a "yes" and then later realize that (for whatever reason) they need to back out.

I have like one or two really close friends and our hang outs are never planned ahead of time. We just text each other whenever we feel like going for a beer or whatever, if he says, let's go later... I'm expecting a no and a never text back, vice versa, and we both understands. If he says, let's do something tomorrow... I don't have the expectation that we're going to do something tomorrow. It's usually a "i'll check back with him tomorrow to see if he still wants to go".

If we planned a place to chill and i get there and he doesn't show up without notice, that's what i call a "ditch". If he texts and gives a good reason, I'll probably text back with "you fucker... ok next time then". Next time, i'll make sure I don't show up first.. and text him to see if he's there first. Call it no trust or whatever... but we're straightforward and honest about it.

If you place people who forgets that they are suppose to go somewhere with you as good friends, take my advice... they're not worth hanging out with. And I can say that most of these people forget what happened during your hang outs, since they're so forgetful anyways. So those moments where you think you guys clicked, it's probably how they are, trying super hard to cope with you yet they don't even know it (hence why they make promises all the time... to cope with you). I don't know if I'm making sense, since it's kinda deep thinking.

Yeah no I hear ya. I got a bunch of close buds and that's how we work as well.

The thing that really chaps me is the txts I always tend to get about 4 hours from a event that usually go something like "yo you still wanna go" ..Then followed by "you know what man, I think im gunna pass tonight" txt 1 hour before we are suppose to meet.

Shouldn't you be on some UFC forums or something there Mr Chuck Liddell:nyan:

Shouldnt you be crying over friends ditching you?

Good....One? Better luck next time :facepalm:

Its right up there with your fantastic insult.

...and yeah....we all have these types of friends but I would say it's primarily that they don't commit to anything much/these are the people who don't bother to put effort into anything. There isn't a way to deal with them other than calling them out on it.
Posted via RS Mobile

ive bailed on my close circle of friends quite a few times. usually my friends like to get dressed up n what not, make reservations at nice places and eat out in style almost every 2nd week. I rarely give a definite answer saying "yeah ill go", usually its a "I should be able to, call me before hand though!". ill try to go as often as I can, but a lot of the times I see my bank account just drop from doing all the activities with them, so my bail outs are usually my way of stopping myself from overspending since im saving for my own place.


what REALLY pisses me off was last weekend, gf's friends all jumped at me saying "lets have a bon fire up at stave lake!!!! you can bring guns and wooden pallets, we'll all chip in 50$ and have a sweeeet day/night"...so me and the gf agreed...a guy not far from my house gives me wooden pallets all the time, so those are free, however, insuring my truck for the day + 1/2 tank of gas to fill it up is aprox 130-150$, buying some hotdogs beers chips etc, maybe 50$, buying some ammunition...maybe 100$..

night before, everyone was stoked to go, morning of, still stoked to go, after I get all the shit and everything "oh, were gonna go to cultus lake waterslides instead" .... are you fucking kidding me....I spend 300$ to have a decent night while expecting to get paid back and these bitches bail with less than a few hours notice.

ill no longer be talking to them, they're the gfs friends, and they'll stay as her friends, not mine.

but, to make things easier, me and my friends don't text 1 on 1 unless we've got something private to say, other than that, we use group chat with 6-8 guys so everyone is aware, and we can all get everyones input at once. makes it a lot easier to set up plans for bbq's and nights out.

OP relax, its the internet. people will give you a hard time regardless of what you say (esp on RS)
if there was ever a time to grow thicker skin, now is the time

anyways, you should have a sense within your friends who is reliable and who is butt fuck not. if it becomes a habit, call them out on it. none of this passive aggressive shit or even just bottling it in (that is , if you want to continue hanging out with them). if not, just ditch them

also, say if today is a tuesday and you ask to hangout with them on a saturday. if they were to say, "im not sure, i will tell you later" then give them a hard deadline, then say wednesday night at 4:00pm.

- if you just say "okay" instead, at the very worst the person will not feel obligated to respond to you in a timely manner...say until friday evening. and of course, you dont want to keep pestering them for a reply after the initial conversation.

yeah good on you stewie. thats gutless of them to just bail on you like that given all youve bought in

did your gf tell them what a horseshit move that was?

I personally told them on facebook chat.

since it would have been me, my gf, and 3 of her gf's, we'd all fit in my truck.

but instead there was a group of cute boys they knew going to cultus and they figured it would be a good chance to show themselves off in bikinis to them...real mature for girls in their mid 20's

people bail all the time i have friends that bail on plans every other time we go out. their the outsiders of our group of friends, the people that always go are the ones who make the plans, and have first say on where and when we go.

1 in 7 times is hardly a reason to make a thread on RS.

there have been plenty of stupider threads on RS.

lolyumaddoe

Yeah after reading all this I think it mainly has to do with people not having the ability to commit to anything. Maybe its something passed down from their parents, who knows.

I don't think it's completely the ditching that pisses me off also, I think its the b.s excuse some people give like as if we are really going to fall for it. Its like when you call in sick for work but your hung over, everyone knows your just making it up.

Say your goodbyes and have a farewell party for this friend.

as i get older i find my time more valuable, and my life needing to be drama free...

people wasting my time?

http://24.media.tumblr.com/9a38d3e2a...bub6o1_500.gif

I started bailing on an old buddy of mine all the time simply because I started noticing he only wanted to hang out when he needed wheels to get to a party or somethin.

I got some friends who are like that. Says they will go somewhere but some how makes up a bullshit excuse of not going or simply doesn't reply(return calls or texts) after, especially when they confirm they are going to go.

Quite disrespectful of them. They say they are going they go/do something, yet end up backing out.

lol who needs friends when u can just go on RS everyone, no ones gonna bail u on here :troll: