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The thin line between love and hate
Mature discussion about understanding the opposite sex...

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Old 02-22-2014, 10:29 PM   #1
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Divorce - BC Law

Ok looks like I'm heading down this road and before anyone says "sorry to hear"...please don't..this is what we both want.

So there is no pre-nup.

What are our rights for :

Property division? Is it really 50-50?

I don't have a problem with 50-50 but 'she' does and threatens to hire the best lawyer in town to fight it. I have done nothing wrong in terms of adultery, abuse, no drugs and no alcoholic episodes.

Married since 2008, we have a home that I have been paying the mortgage and all associated utility bills since day 1.

I really don't see how a "big money" lawyer can convince the judge to give me less.

Anyone relate or can provide input?

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Old 02-22-2014, 11:33 PM   #2
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to my knowledge, if the divorce is mutual, 50/50 is the most common split, but however, terms can be set between the partners if they both agree to them.

the biggest asset right now is your property by your post. who is the titled owner of the property?

i think by her hiring a lawyer, is if she is trying to fight for a bigger split.
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Old 02-23-2014, 12:13 AM   #3
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^^

Both our names are on title. And yes she wants a
bigger split but there are no grounds. Maybe financial hardship I don't know
but she is employed full time at a govt position.
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Old 02-23-2014, 12:17 AM   #4
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I think as a guys, we don't think that we need a pre-nup for the reason that we love of spouse and see the marriage going "till death do us part."

But some women these days think that but they also think that I get half his shit and then some because I am the women. And the courts are and will always be biased towards women in divorces.

They are put over top when they paint themselves as the victim in the marriage to gain sympathy from the judge and courts.

But that's just my point of view. I would say she will get 50% of the assets and more on top.
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Old 02-23-2014, 12:26 AM   #5
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The Family Law Act says that each spouse is entitled to an undivided, one half interest of all family property. That law was just passed last year and the whole point was to reduce judicial discretion and make it easier for people to settle their divorces outside of court. If what OP says is true then it will be difficult for his spouse to get more than one half.

But as always, if you are worried then talk to an actual lawyer!
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Old 02-23-2014, 12:27 AM   #6
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Old 02-23-2014, 12:34 AM   #7
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OP should consult a lawyer, I think his wife is going to pull the "victim card."
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Old 02-23-2014, 02:04 AM   #8
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Definitely talk to a lawyer.

The only things I can think of that might be factors in whether one gets more or less than 50%, are if children are involved and pre-marital assets.
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Old 02-23-2014, 08:02 AM   #9
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get a lawyer ASAP. there are huge benefits on who files first.

it protects you and in case the deal wasn't clean, whoever files first gets to plea their case first and it gives you a huge benefit JUST in case it gets ugly.

2) always disclose what you have. you thinkyou can cheat ur wife by hiding some of ur funds somewhere off shore etc ... don't even think about it.

3) always always always be clear with your lawyer. he is ur friend, the more you hide from him, it WILL bite you in the end
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Old 02-23-2014, 09:32 AM   #10
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My understanding of the current law is this:

- Property acquired before the marriage: both you and your soon-to-be ex-wife get to keep what you acquired before the marriage
- Property you acquired during the marriage: split 50-50
- Income from assets during the marriage: split 50-50
- Pensions or retirement income: both parties are put in a place where pensions/retirement income will be split 50-50. She is a public servant, so depending on your respective incomes, you may be entitled to a share of her future pension. If you think she will try to fight for more than 50-50, then you could reasonably argue that her pension would be a set-off.
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Old 02-23-2014, 10:50 AM   #11
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If she persists the only one who is going to win are the lawyers. Doesn't look like you have any choice if she pushes the issue, sounds like a complete bitch.
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Old 02-23-2014, 10:51 AM   #12
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K. Who makes majority income this plays a factor as if she's a "stay at home wife" they're are ways for her to get more money.
Get a lawyer to help you... Unless it mutual but even then she has one year to rebuttal. Get professional help at least for info.
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Old 02-23-2014, 12:00 PM   #13
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My understanding of the current law is this:

- Property acquired before the marriage: both you and your soon-to-be ex-wife get to keep what you acquired before the marriage
- Property you acquired during the marriage: split 50-50
- Income from assets during the marriage: split 50-50
- Pensions or retirement income: both parties are put in a place where pensions/retirement income will be split 50-50. She is a public servant, so depending on your respective incomes, you may be entitled to a share of her future pension. If you think she will try to fight for more than 50-50, then you could reasonably argue that her pension would be a set-off.
I think this is more or less right. I asked a friend who took family law what she thought and basically the presumption of the Family Law Act is 50:50 and it is very difficult to rebut that presumption if there is no contract or the OP willingly gives her more.

Judges may not want to mess around with property rights but the OP's spouse may argue for spousal support, for at least a period of time afterwards, based on, among others, financial disparity and a lower quality of life after the divorce.

This is coming from law students and not actual lawyers so take that it with a grain of salt. Family law tends to be very fact specific too. Again, the best advice anyone on RS can give is to get an actual lawyer.
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Old 02-23-2014, 12:07 PM   #14
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and this is why people should not get married
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Old 02-23-2014, 12:14 PM   #15
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If she persists the only one who is going to win are the lawyers. Doesn't look like you have any choice if she pushes the issue, sounds like a complete bitch.
This could work to the OP's advantage since Asian mentality would dictate that money spent out of pocket, for a lawyer, with the possibility of little to no return, may not be worth it.
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Old 02-23-2014, 12:17 PM   #16
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and this is why people should not get married
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Old 02-23-2014, 12:20 PM   #17
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it might be a good time to dig up all and if any paper records that you have in regards to bill payments and mortgage payments to prove that it was all done by you. definitely get a lawyer asap and give him full details. the earlier the better.
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Old 02-23-2014, 01:26 PM   #18
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Old 02-23-2014, 05:00 PM   #19
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get a lawyer ASAP. there are huge benefits on who files first.

it protects you and in case the deal wasn't clean, whoever files first gets to plea their case first and it gives you a huge benefit JUST in case it gets ugly.

2) always disclose what you have. you thinkyou can cheat ur wife by hiding some of ur funds somewhere off shore etc ... don't even think about it.

3) always always always be clear with your lawyer. he is ur friend, the more you hide from him, it WILL bite you in the end
this this this this

my dad got screwed so bad on no grounds and lies.

what theyre saying about courts being biased towards women is still very much true.. canadas all about "protecting women and children"
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Old 02-23-2014, 05:08 PM   #20
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I just want to share some insights with you guys

My past supervisor was married for almost 12 years, with 3 kids, youngest at 3. The mom stayed home 24/7, the dad worked 10 hour days x 6 days.

Anyways, the divorced because she admitted to him that she was cheating. After all said and done, he was out 250k just to kept her from taking the house, and now paying almost 2.5k a month for child support.

Shitty deal even if the other partner has done nothing wrong.

Hope it works out for you, best of luck
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Old 02-23-2014, 09:37 PM   #21
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I just want to share some insights with you guys

My past supervisor was married for almost 12 years, with 3 kids, youngest at 3. The mom stayed home 24/7, the dad worked 10 hour days x 6 days.

Anyways, the divorced because she admitted to him that she was cheating. After all said and done, he was out 250k just to kept her from taking the house, and now paying almost 2.5k a month for child support.

Shitty deal even if the other partner has done nothing wrong.

Hope it works out for you, best of luck
What would happen if your supervisor say fuck it quit his job and becomes a bum who relys on EI?
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Old 02-23-2014, 10:21 PM   #22
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Doubl3_H View Post
I just want to share some insights with you guys

My past supervisor was married for almost 12 years, with 3 kids, youngest at 3. The mom stayed home 24/7, the dad worked 10 hour days x 6 days.

Anyways, the divorced because she admitted to him that she was cheating. After all said and done, he was out 250k just to kept her from taking the house, and now paying almost 2.5k a month for child support.

Shitty deal even if the other partner has done nothing wrong.

Hope it works out for you, best of luck

lol was bout to post smthn similar. lived with uncle/aunt. she ended up cheating on him they divorced and she took half his shit. still has to pay her for the little one even tho now shes married to the guy.

needless to say that went to show how fail this system is
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Old 02-23-2014, 10:27 PM   #23
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good post on the FB part. you are NO LONGER friends to their family members. DO NOT over share on anything and you MUST delete everything.

I don't care if you had a bday party and you had 1 picture of you doing a shot off ur friends's chest, BAM, that's pic and evidence on how you're addicted to alcohol or whatever story it'll get painted.

1) whoever paints the story first gets first DIPS on who you want to portray. You want to look like a hero, great. if you want to make your wife look like a retard, good. If your wife goes first... BAM, all you are left to do is defend defend defend.

2) i don't care what she says "oh, it's best to leave lawyers out of the way". BAM, second last day, you are left with nothing cause she lawyered up.
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Old 02-24-2014, 08:54 AM   #24
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Doubl3_H View Post
I just want to share some insights with you guys

My past supervisor was married for almost 12 years, with 3 kids, youngest at 3. The mom stayed home 24/7, the dad worked 10 hour days x 6 days.

Anyways, the divorced because she admitted to him that she was cheating. After all said and done, he was out 250k just to kept her from taking the house, and now paying almost 2.5k a month for child support.

Shitty deal even if the other partner has done nothing wrong.

Hope it works out for you, best of luck
Something people seem to forget is that we have "no-fault" divorce laws in Canada. If one partner cheats, it's irrelevant to how the assets are distributed. Your supervisor "lost" because his ex-wife was a stay at home mom who made no income of her own. The purpose of a divorce settlement is to make both parties roughly equal financially following their divorce.

I will go on a tangent, but the fact that many exes lost their shirts in divorces over the last 30 years explains why marriage is largely becoming confined to the upper-middle class. Marriage is really an economic union, a way to preserve wealth. If you want to mitigate the risks, marry someone with just as much to lose as you do.
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Old 02-24-2014, 09:25 AM   #25
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Something people seem to forget is that we have "no-fault" divorce laws in Canada. If one partner cheats, it's irrelevant to how the assets are distributed. Your supervisor "lost" because his ex-wife was a stay at home mom who made no income of her own. The purpose of a divorce settlement is to make both parties roughly equal financially following their divorce.

I will go on a tangent, but the fact that many exes lost their shirts in divorces over the last 30 years explains why marriage is largely becoming confined to the upper-middle class. Marriage is really an economic union, a way to preserve wealth. If you want to mitigate the risks, marry someone with just as much to lose as you do.
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