Justin Trudeau files 35 million workplace harassment complaints against Canada
 

Justin Trudeau files 35 million workplace harassment complaints against Canada - The Beaverton - North America's Trusted Source of News

Justin Trudeau files 35 million workplace harassment complaints against Canada
Saturday, 24 October 2015 16:42 Written by Pat Dussault

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OTTAWA – Less than one week after guiding his party to a surprise majority in the federal election, Prime Minister-designate Justin Trudeau has already filed 35 million workplace harassment complaints against his employers, the people of Canada.

“Obviously this isn’t the way I envisioned starting a new job,” explained Trudeau, “But I can’t work like this. Everywhere I go, women keep calling me names like ‘The PMILF,’ telling me to smile more, and yelling things like “show us your abs!” This morning, Marc Garneau and Bill Blair had a 45-minute conversation about how fuckable I am. In my office. Right in front me.”

The Liberal leader went on to add that the problem is even worse online, where his social media feeds have been inundated with shirtless photos of him, invitations from constituents to “Netflix and chill,” as well as countless links to editorial pieces on what political insiders all agree is “a pretty stellar D”.

The harassment has become so pervasive, Trudeau notes, that’s it’s even spread beyond Canada’s borders.

“Angela Merkel drunk dialled me at 3am last night,” recounted the Papineau MP, “To tell me she’d rather sit on my face than on the UN Security Council.”

But while Trudeau sees himself as a victim, the government’s Chief Human Resources Officer places blame for the unwanted attention squarely on the taut, muscular shoulders Canada’s 29th Prime Minister. In a statement released today, the CHRO claimed that Mr. Trudeau is “asking for it with those suits he wears.”

“The guy just spent two and half months travelling across the country, begging Canadians to let him show us what he can do,” the statement continued. “And then when we try to take him up on it, he complains.”

“Fuckin’ tease.”

Now the real question is if whether Timpo thinks this is real.

people change
this community's changed
Timpo though
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Not sure if this is legit.
Tried to find a 2nd news source to compare, but couldn't find anything about it on The Onion.

:derp:

^ Being a Canadian story, you'd have to look at the Syrup Trap.

You need to get yourself checked if you have to confirm if the news is real or not.

Dafuq did I just read? 35 million complaints filed? If they are gonna make shit up at least make it a believable number.

I saw this on fb, therefore it must be true!

It's the population of Canada FailFish

It's still hard for me to comprehend that California's population is the same as Canada's.

Well, I guess it's nothing compared to China or India, but still.

Actually, this guy at a party once told me that when he was in China, he would go to these bars where you could "buy" girls for the night to be with you, feed you, pretty much do whatever you wanted and he said they only made $1-2 USD per day.

I didn't believe that, but he swore that's what they told him. I think they just told him that so he would tip them. He said he would tip each girl like $20USD and every time he went back, he would be swarmed by the girls.


lol, sorry i'm off topic here.

BRB, going to China...

Actually California is supposedly over the 40 million threshold now. So they are actually still way beyond us.

WTF is this news site...

A few headline below Timpo's:
Tearful Stephen Harper boards spaceship for return to home planet - The Beaverton - North America's Trusted Source of News

"CALGARY - Following Stephen Harper's emotional concession speech Monday night, hundreds of Conservative Party supporters claimed to have seen a massive blue object launching from Harper's home base of Calgary Heritage."


Oh haha. On every "news" article:
"Do you enjoy our reporting? Help us grow our coverage and reach by purchasing a voluntary subscription to our content. You will be supporting a Canadian brand that promotes social and economic justice."

Hey Timpo, do you have news about our PM Trudeau driving a GT-R? :troll:

24 sussex drive comes with free GTR. Its in the constitution.