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-   -   The Official F*** My Life Thread (https://www.revscene.net/forums/565266-official-f%2A%2A%2A-my-life-thread.html)

rslater 03-26-2009 07:58 PM
Today, I bought my girlfriend two tickets to a Broadway show that was coming through town she really wanted to see. I couldn't attend with her due to work so she said she would take her mom. I found out later she took her ex. Now they're back together, and I paid for the date that made it happen. FML

Vansterdam 03-26-2009 08:20 PM
^ ouch

3xta 03-27-2009 12:03 AM
^^ thats a real FML

6insomnia9 03-27-2009 01:55 AM
mymomisafob.com
lawllawl

+Kardboard+ 03-30-2009 08:34 AM
My submission. -_-
Quote:
Great. Thanks Earth Hour. Made me knock my new phone into a toilet because I couldn't see in the dark. I can't fix it. Lovely. FML

JulyZerg 03-30-2009 07:29 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mananetwork (Post 6349086)
Today, while at the Golden Gate Bridge, I spotted a large group of Asians trying to take a picture. Trying to be a diplomat, I slowly say "You... want me... take picture?" while using hand motions. The man looks at me and says "No thanks asshole. I got it." in plain English. FML

Today, a co-worker and I walked out of our office at the same time. He got in his car, which was parked right out front. I asked him what I had to do to get a sweet parking spot like that. He proceeded to roll up his pant leg and show me his prosthesis. He was in the handicapped spot. FML

Today, I repaired a boiler for a wealthy guy in a big house. While there, I fixed a leaking tap for free. When I went to go, the man slipped something into my shirt pocket and said "have a drink on me." When I got to my truck, I discovered that he'd given me a tea bag. FML
holy fuck that was hilarious! LOL :haha::haha:

unfathomable 03-31-2009 11:28 AM
Today, I was feeling sick and having trouble breathing easily. I decided to take a nap and apparently ended up sleeping with my mouth wide open since breathing was an issue. I woke up to my boyfriend trying to put his penis in my mouth. FML

Mananetwork 05-06-2009 10:49 AM
Today, was my first meeting with business partners as I am new to the team. Instead of saying that I was looking forward to "stretching my legs" or "spreading my wings", I told them I was anxious to start "spreading my legs". FML

Today, I was driving home at night when I saw a billboard flash "report drunk drivers". 15 minuted later, I saw someone drive recklessly as if they were drunk. When I called the cops, I got pulled over by another cop for talking on my cell phone. I got a $150 ticket. FML

Today, my boss asked me to pick up some supplies for a presentation. I entered the store in the middle of an armed robbery, was knocked to the floor, and had my cash, phone and credit cards stolen. When I told my boss the story, she said, "So were you able to get the binder clips?" FML

+Kardboard+ 05-06-2009 10:54 AM
HAHAHAHA "Spreading my legs" ahahaha

:haha:

StylinRed 05-06-2009 07:54 PM
Today, my family was preparing a turkey for my grandma's birthday dinner when my aunt noticed a utensil on the counter and asked what it was for. My mom said it was used to keep the turkey's legs together. My aunt responded to her by saying, "Maybe you should get one for your daughter." FML


lol

and that asian camera one is hilarious literally lol'd


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