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Vancouver Off-Topic / Current Events The off-topic forum for Vancouver, funnies, non-auto centered discussions, WORK SAFE. While the rules are more relaxed here, there are still rules. Please refer to sticky thread in this forum.

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Old 02-19-2009, 12:45 PM   #26
Rs has made me the woman i am today!
 
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Been reading it for a while. Some classic ones.
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Old 02-19-2009, 12:56 PM   #27
To me, there is the Internet and there is RS
 
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hahah, some good stuff on there

"Today, I walked in on my mom changing. She was trying on a thong my boyfriend bought me for valentines day. It looks better on her. FML."
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Old 02-19-2009, 01:12 PM   #28
Willing to sell body for a few minutes on RS
 
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Originally Posted by quasi View Post
Today, my 5 year old nephew showed me green martians he'd made with his new Play Doh set. I smiled and said, "Wow! Now, how about some blue martians!" He looked at me and replied, "How about some blue shut the fuck up!". FML

Today, I decided to watch some porn before bed. The lights were off and my roommate was already asleep behind me. I put on my noise-canceling headphones and turned up the volume all the way. After a few strokes my roommate got up and plugged in the headphones for me. FML

Today, I was sitting at home, venting to my parents about how I never get asked out by any of the guys at school. My Dads words of wisdom were "Don't worry, looks don't matter so much in college. Once they've had a few beers in them, they'll date anything." FML

Today, I visited my 78 year old grandmother. She thanked me for visiting and gave me a magazine before I left telling me I might find something I like in there. When I got home I looked at the magazine only to realize it's full of dildos and sextoys. FML
Oh man, I can't stop laughing!
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Old 02-19-2009, 01:27 PM   #29
How I Mod your mother
 
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OMG that site is the best way to kill time
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Old 02-19-2009, 01:56 PM   #30
Blood tests positive for LOL mod
 
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Today, I decided to watch some porn before bed. The lights were off and my roommate was already asleep behind me. I put on my noise-canceling headphones and turned up the volume all the way. After a few strokes my roommate got up and plugged in the headphones for me. FML
This one wins in my opinion!
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Old 02-19-2009, 03:27 PM   #31
My AFC gave me an ABS CEL code of LOL while at WOT!
 
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haha the bingo one wuz heeelariioooooooooooooous
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Old 02-19-2009, 03:43 PM   #32
I contribute to threads in the offtopic forum
 
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Today, I woke up in a girls bed, that I have had a crush on for two years. She was sleeping on the floor with someone else. FML

Today, my boyfriend and I were in Victoria's Secret. I saw a picture of a model and said, "I wish I looked like that." He replied with, "Me too." FML

Ouch LOL
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Old 02-19-2009, 03:46 PM   #33
My homepage has been set to RS
 
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fucking love this site
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Old 02-19-2009, 03:53 PM   #34
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Today, my professor, who was born without arms, asked somebody "need a hand?" There are over 300 students in that class and I was the only one laughing. FML

"Today, I was working the register at a local grocery store. A kid about 5 years old was having trouble zipping his jacket. I reached out to help him and he started screaming "No bad touch bad touch!" and kicked me in the knee. Everyone looked. FML"

HAHAHAHAH
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Old 02-19-2009, 06:07 PM   #35
RS.net, helping ugly ppl have sex since 2001
 
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Today, my professor, who was born without arms, asked somebody "need a hand?" There are over 300 students in that class and I was the only one laughing. FML

"Today, I was working the register at a local grocery store. A kid about 5 years old was having trouble zipping his jacket. I reached out to help him and he started screaming "No bad touch bad touch!" and kicked me in the knee. Everyone looked. FML"

HAHAHAHAH
LOL, that mustve been epic
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Old 02-19-2009, 08:00 PM   #36
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those are good
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Old 02-19-2009, 09:02 PM   #37
I *Fwap* *Fwap* *Fwap* to RS
 
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Today, my professor, who was born without arms, asked somebody "need a hand?" There are over 300 students in that class and I was the only one laughing. FML

I seriously LOL 'ED


Today, my mom found a condom in my pocket while doing my laundry. Instead of having the subsequent discussion about the birds and the bees my mother simply asked "Who would have sex with you?" FML
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Old 02-19-2009, 10:34 PM   #38
What hasn't Killed me, has made me more tolerant of RS!
 
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Today, I lost 200 dollars while playing poker with my new sunglasses. Turns out you can see the cards in the reflection. FML

Today, I submitted my picture to a rating website. It was rejected because I didn't clarify which person I was. The picture was of my dog and me. FML
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Old 02-19-2009, 10:39 PM   #39
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Today, I lost 200 dollars while playing poker with my new sunglasses. Turns out you can see the cards in the reflection. FML

Today, I submitted my picture to a rating website. It was rejected because I didn't clarify which person I was. The picture was of my dog and me. FML
LMFAO. I LOL'D IRL HARD
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Old 02-19-2009, 10:52 PM   #40
Need my Daily Fix of RS
 
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this made my day lol
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Old 02-19-2009, 10:55 PM   #41
I contribute to threads in the offtopic forum
 
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This is my personal favourite, subtle hints are FTW
Today, My boyfriend gave me a gift card for $32 to a local salon. I thought the amount was kind of random, but when I went in I saw that the bikini wax was $32. FML
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Old 02-19-2009, 11:08 PM   #42
I Will not Admit my Addiction to RS
 
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This happened to a friend of mine.

Today, I was bidding on a pair of jeans on eBay, I was getting outbid at the last minute and I kept bidding. I was so into it that,
when the auction ended, I had bought the jeans for $15 over the buy it now price. -FML
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Old 02-19-2009, 11:12 PM   #43
Hypa owned my ass at least once
 
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lol omg great site
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Old 02-19-2009, 11:17 PM   #44
PM me for my nudes
 
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This happened to a friend of mine.

Today, I was bidding on a pair of jeans on eBay, I was getting outbid at the last minute and I kept bidding. I was so into it that,
when the auction ended, I had bought the jeans for $15 over the buy it now price. -FML
once it goes over, you cant buy it now.

and ive done it too.

it sucks
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This wouldn't happen if you didn't drive a peasant car like an Audi...
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I'd probably blow someone for that 911
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Old 02-19-2009, 11:18 PM   #45
HELP ME PLS!!!
 
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once it goes over, you cant buy it now.

and ive done it too.

it sucks
dont post again ur post is 888
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Old 02-20-2009, 01:27 AM   #46
I is Romanian
 
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dont post again ur post is 888
LOL! Typical asian...
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Old 02-20-2009, 02:04 AM   #47
Raping Captured Dolphins since 2002 on EZ board days
 
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Oh god some of this shit is hilarious:

oday I returned home from college for the first time in a month. I went to my bedroom and found a nice gift bag on my dresser, thinking it was a Valentine's gift , I opened it. My dog's ashes were in a tin inside. This is how I found out my dog has died since I have been away. FML
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Old 02-20-2009, 08:21 AM   #48
Everyone wants a piece of R S...
 
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LOL 10bajillion times..
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- Small victories... tasty like salty peanuts. Peanuts, the proper diameter of your anus. Protect it well my friends!
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Old 02-20-2009, 09:20 AM   #49
How I Mod your mother
 
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I thought this one was pretty witty

"Today, I called up my ex girlfriend to ask her if I could come round hers to get my pyjamas back. She replied: “I’m keeping them just in case...”- “In case of what?”- “In case I want to dress up like an asshole”. FML"
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Old 02-20-2009, 01:16 PM   #50
WOAH! i think Vtec just kicked in!
 
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"Today, I was looking down at my paper in class and my spanish teacher asked if I was sleeping or not. I'm Asian. My eyes were open. FML"


lol
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