| Vancouver Off-Topic / Current Events The off-topic forum for Vancouver, funnies, non-auto centered discussions, WORK SAFE. While the rules are more relaxed here, there are still rules. Please refer to sticky thread in this forum. |
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02-19-2009, 12:45 PM
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#26 | | Rs has made me the woman i am today!
Join Date: Mar 2002 Location: East Van
Posts: 4,086
Thanked 39 Times in 20 Posts
Failed 0 Times in 0 Posts
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Been reading it for a while. Some classic ones.
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"FOR THE LOVE OF GOD AND ALL THAT IS HOLY, MY ANUS IS BLEEDING!!!!!!!!!!" | 
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02-19-2009, 12:56 PM
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#27 | | To me, there is the Internet and there is RS
Join Date: May 2001 Location: 604
Posts: 16,870
Thanked 605 Times in 200 Posts
Failed 73 Times in 13 Posts
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hahah, some good stuff on there
"Today, I walked in on my mom changing. She was trying on a thong my boyfriend bought me for valentines day. It looks better on her. FML."  | |
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02-19-2009, 01:12 PM
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#28 | | Willing to sell body for a few minutes on RS
Join Date: Aug 2002 Location: Vancouver
Posts: 10,651
Thanked 3,813 Times in 1,483 Posts
Failed 142 Times in 70 Posts
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Originally Posted by quasi  Today, my 5 year old nephew showed me green martians he'd made with his new Play Doh set. I smiled and said, "Wow! Now, how about some blue martians!" He looked at me and replied, "How about some blue shut the fuck up!". FML
Today, I decided to watch some porn before bed. The lights were off and my roommate was already asleep behind me. I put on my noise-canceling headphones and turned up the volume all the way. After a few strokes my roommate got up and plugged in the headphones for me. FML
Today, I was sitting at home, venting to my parents about how I never get asked out by any of the guys at school. My Dads words of wisdom were "Don't worry, looks don't matter so much in college. Once they've had a few beers in them, they'll date anything." FML
Today, I visited my 78 year old grandmother. She thanked me for visiting and gave me a magazine before I left telling me I might find something I like in there. When I got home I looked at the magazine only to realize it's full of dildos and sextoys. FML | Oh man, I can't stop laughing! 
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Do Not Put Aftershave on Your Balls. -604CEFIRO
Looks like I'm gonna have some hot sex again tonight...OOPS i got the 6 pack. that wont last me the night, I better go back and get the 24 pack! -Turbo E
kinda off topic but obama is a dilf - miss_crayon
Honest to fucking Christ the easiest way to get a married woman in the mood is clean the house and do the laundry.....I've been with the same girl almost 17 years, ask me how I know. - quasi
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02-19-2009, 01:27 PM
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#29 | | How I Mod your mother
Join Date: Jul 2004 Location: Crayon Box
Posts: 13,688
Thanked 977 Times in 477 Posts
Failed 18 Times in 11 Posts
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OMG that site is the best way to kill time
__________________ Quote: | [19-07, 16:52] bloodmack: EB did u change my avatar and title?
| Quote: | [19-07, 16:54] El Bastardo: bm i have no idea what you're talking about because i don't speak gorilla
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02-19-2009, 01:56 PM
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#30 | | Blood tests positive for LOL mod
Join Date: May 2002 Location: World
Posts: 12,999
Thanked 1,263 Times in 325 Posts
Failed 83 Times in 18 Posts
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Originally Posted by quasi Today, I decided to watch some porn before bed. The lights were off and my roommate was already asleep behind me. I put on my noise-canceling headphones and turned up the volume all the way. After a few strokes my roommate got up and plugged in the headphones for me. FML | This one wins in my opinion!
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02-19-2009, 03:27 PM
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#31 | | My AFC gave me an ABS CEL code of LOL while at WOT!
Join Date: Jan 2008 Location: Vancouver
Posts: 1,788
Thanked 33 Times in 17 Posts
Failed 5 Times in 2 Posts
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haha the bingo one wuz heeelariioooooooooooooous
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02-19-2009, 03:43 PM
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#32 | | I contribute to threads in the offtopic forum
Join Date: Aug 2002 Location: Vancouver
Posts: 2,641
Thanked 634 Times in 260 Posts
Failed 12 Times in 9 Posts
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Today, I woke up in a girls bed, that I have had a crush on for two years. She was sleeping on the floor with someone else. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were in Victoria's Secret. I saw a picture of a model and said, "I wish I looked like that." He replied with, "Me too." FML
Ouch LOL
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02-19-2009, 03:46 PM
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#33 | | My homepage has been set to RS
Join Date: Feb 2008 Location: 604
Posts: 2,300
Thanked 551 Times in 80 Posts
Failed 37 Times in 10 Posts
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fucking love this site
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PSN: JHUJeW
O o
/Ż/___________________________ _ __/
| SHOOP DA WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOP!!
\_\ŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻ Ż ŻŻ\
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02-19-2009, 03:53 PM
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#34 | | HELP ME PLS!!!
Join Date: Jun 2005 Location: vancouver
Posts: 5,688
Thanked 251 Times in 71 Posts
Failed 40 Times in 12 Posts
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Today, my professor, who was born without arms, asked somebody "need a hand?" There are over 300 students in that class and I was the only one laughing. FML
"Today, I was working the register at a local grocery store. A kid about 5 years old was having trouble zipping his jacket. I reached out to help him and he started screaming "No bad touch bad touch!" and kicked me in the knee. Everyone looked. FML"
HAHAHAHAH
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02-19-2009, 06:07 PM
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#35 | | RS.net, helping ugly ppl have sex since 2001
Join Date: Sep 2008 Location: Vancouver
Posts: 8,858
Thanked 2,420 Times in 669 Posts
Failed 530 Times in 136 Posts
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Originally Posted by 3xta Today, my professor, who was born without arms, asked somebody "need a hand?" There are over 300 students in that class and I was the only one laughing. FML
"Today, I was working the register at a local grocery store. A kid about 5 years old was having trouble zipping his jacket. I reached out to help him and he started screaming "No bad touch bad touch!" and kicked me in the knee. Everyone looked. FML"
HAHAHAHAH | LOL, that mustve been epic
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02-19-2009, 08:00 PM
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#36 | | Banned By Establishment
Join Date: Mar 2002 Location: 604
Posts: 4,015
Thanked 475 Times in 285 Posts
Failed 115 Times in 24 Posts
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those are good
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02-19-2009, 09:02 PM
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#37 | | I *Fwap* *Fwap* *Fwap* to RS
Join Date: Jul 2008 Location: vancouver
Posts: 1,523
Thanked 139 Times in 82 Posts
Failed 10 Times in 3 Posts
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Today, my professor, who was born without arms, asked somebody "need a hand?" There are over 300 students in that class and I was the only one laughing. FML
I seriously LOL 'ED
Today, my mom found a condom in my pocket while doing my laundry. Instead of having the subsequent discussion about the birds and the bees my mother simply asked "Who would have sex with you?" FML
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02-19-2009, 10:34 PM
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#38 | | What hasn't Killed me, has made me more tolerant of RS!
Join Date: May 2005 Location: vancity
Posts: 161
Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
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Today, I lost 200 dollars while playing poker with my new sunglasses. Turns out you can see the cards in the reflection. FML
Today, I submitted my picture to a rating website. It was rejected because I didn't clarify which person I was. The picture was of my dog and me. FML
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02-19-2009, 10:39 PM
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#39 | | Banned (ABWS)
Join Date: Apr 2008 Location: vancouver
Posts: 3,303
Thanked 1,107 Times in 271 Posts
Failed 66 Times in 25 Posts
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Originally Posted by kwon Today, I lost 200 dollars while playing poker with my new sunglasses. Turns out you can see the cards in the reflection. FML
Today, I submitted my picture to a rating website. It was rejected because I didn't clarify which person I was. The picture was of my dog and me. FML | LMFAO. I LOL'D IRL HARD
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02-19-2009, 10:52 PM
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#40 | | Need my Daily Fix of RS
Join Date: May 2007 Location: -250-
Posts: 274
Thanked 1 Time in 1 Post
Failed 1 Time in 1 Post
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this made my day lol
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99' ek / write-off
03' oz rally / SOLD
02' rsx-s
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02-19-2009, 10:55 PM
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#41 | | I contribute to threads in the offtopic forum
Join Date: Apr 2007 Location: n zone
Posts: 2,660
Thanked 1,910 Times in 606 Posts
Failed 325 Times in 112 Posts
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This is my personal favourite, subtle hints are FTW
Today, My boyfriend gave me a gift card for $32 to a local salon. I thought the amount was kind of random, but when I went in I saw that the bikini wax was $32. FML
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02-19-2009, 11:08 PM
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#42 | | I Will not Admit my Addiction to RS
Join Date: Jun 2005 Location: Burnaby
Posts: 599
Thanked 82 Times in 14 Posts
Failed 0 Times in 0 Posts
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This happened to a friend of mine.
Today, I was bidding on a pair of jeans on eBay, I was getting outbid at the last minute and I kept bidding. I was so into it that,
when the auction ended, I had bought the jeans for $15 over the buy it now price. -FML
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02-19-2009, 11:12 PM
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#43 | | Hypa owned my ass at least once
Join Date: Jul 2004 Location: Vancouver
Posts: 6,592
Thanked 1,491 Times in 341 Posts
Failed 218 Times in 69 Posts
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lol omg great site
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02-19-2009, 11:17 PM
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#44 |
Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: Burnaby
Posts: 3,959
Thanked 3,812 Times in 1,018 Posts
Failed 267 Times in 76 Posts
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Originally Posted by kongx This happened to a friend of mine.
Today, I was bidding on a pair of jeans on eBay, I was getting outbid at the last minute and I kept bidding. I was so into it that,
when the auction ended, I had bought the jeans for $15 over the buy it now price. -FML | once it goes over, you cant buy it now.
and ive done it too.
it sucks
__________________ Quote:
Originally Posted by jasonturbo Too bad it isn't about flipping cars to lose money, I'm really good at that. | Quote:
Originally Posted by SkunkWorks This wouldn't happen if you didn't drive a peasant car like an Audi... | Quote:
[14-05, 14:59] FastAnna You tiny bra wearing, gigantic son of a bitch
[15-05, 10:35] FastAnna Yeah I was dreaming of those big titties in that tiny bra
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Originally Posted by westopher I'd probably blow someone for that 911 | | |
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02-19-2009, 11:18 PM
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#45 | | HELP ME PLS!!!
Join Date: Jun 2005 Location: vancouver
Posts: 5,688
Thanked 251 Times in 71 Posts
Failed 40 Times in 12 Posts
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Originally Posted by smoothie. once it goes over, you cant buy it now.
and ive done it too.
it sucks | dont post again ur post is 888
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02-20-2009, 01:27 AM
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#46 | | I is Romanian
Join Date: Jul 2007 Location: Vansterdam
Posts: 1,756
Thanked 868 Times in 228 Posts
Failed 417 Times in 94 Posts
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Originally Posted by 3xta dont post again ur post is 888 | LOL! Typical asian...  | |
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02-20-2009, 02:04 AM
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#47 | | Raping Captured Dolphins since 2002 on EZ board days
Join Date: Jul 2002 Location: Hong Kong
Posts: 6,251
Thanked 658 Times in 191 Posts
Failed 78 Times in 45 Posts
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Oh god some of this shit is hilarious:
oday I returned home from college for the first time in a month. I went to my bedroom and found a nice gift bag on my dresser, thinking it was a Valentine's gift , I opened it. My dog's ashes were in a tin inside. This is how I found out my dog has died since I have been away. FML
__________________ Quote:
Originally Posted by asian_XL apparently, freedom of speech does not exist on RS
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Originally Posted by Alphamale I give a lot of people rim jobs. | My Feedback | |
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02-20-2009, 08:21 AM
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#48 | | Everyone wants a piece of R S...
Join Date: Sep 2008 Location: Vancouver
Posts: 344
Thanked 14 Times in 7 Posts
Failed 20 Times in 5 Posts
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LOL 10bajillion times..
__________________ Quote: By Valour
- Small victories... tasty like salty peanuts. Peanuts, the proper diameter of your anus. Protect it well my friends!
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02-20-2009, 09:20 AM
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#49 | | How I Mod your mother
Join Date: Jul 2004 Location: Crayon Box
Posts: 13,688
Thanked 977 Times in 477 Posts
Failed 18 Times in 11 Posts
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I thought this one was pretty witty
"Today, I called up my ex girlfriend to ask her if I could come round hers to get my pyjamas back. She replied: “I’m keeping them just in case...”- “In case of what?”- “In case I want to dress up like an asshole”. FML"
__________________ Quote: | [19-07, 16:52] bloodmack: EB did u change my avatar and title?
| Quote: | [19-07, 16:54] El Bastardo: bm i have no idea what you're talking about because i don't speak gorilla
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02-20-2009, 01:16 PM
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#50 | | WOAH! i think Vtec just kicked in!
Join Date: Jan 2004 Location: Vancouver
Posts: 1,635
Thanked 848 Times in 106 Posts
Failed 156 Times in 16 Posts
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"Today, I was looking down at my paper in class and my spanish teacher asked if I was sleeping or not. I'm Asian. My eyes were open. FML"
lol
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