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The thin line between love and hate
Mature discussion about understanding the opposite sex...

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Old 07-18-2009, 01:14 AM   #1
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do relationships within work usually work out or not ?

what do u guys think ?

I've know this girl from my work for about 7 months now but it was until about 1 month ago where we started to talk more and build an awesome chemistry. She's a very outgoing girl, very flirty type. Last month until now, we've been getting along soo well, I'm starting to feel attracted to her, we've hung out a couple times too, talked on the phone, went out to eat, chat on facebook. But I think she sees all of this just as friends kinda thing. She use to like this guy from my work, but he just ignored her, but she still wants to talk to him to work things out. She's very good a pretending and holding her feelings inside.

We get along very well at work and out of work. Now my question is, do you guys think a relationship would work out ?, I'm scared to confess to her that I'm interested in her etc... If things don't work out, I'm scared that there will be awkardness or jeopardize my job. She did thinks that generally work relatiionships are tricky and if they dont' work out and
are not very fun to deal with since you still have to work together.

I've grown to be attractive to her and each day I see her I'm beginning to like her, I dunno if she likes me too, or is interested in me, or is just doing everything as a friend thing.

If you guys have any ideas or inputs on how I can go about this that would be great

thanks

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Old 07-18-2009, 01:18 AM   #2
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How young are you?

If you're pretty young and this job is not your permanent one and career related, I'd say go for it. The potential rewards are worth the risk unless what you're risking is a longterm or career oriented job.
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Old 07-18-2009, 01:21 AM   #3
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Quote:
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How young are you?

If you're pretty young and this job is not your permanent one and career related, I'd say go for it. The potential rewards are worth the risk unless what you're risking is a longterm or career oriented job.
23, i've worked there for 8 months now, its career related
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Old 07-18-2009, 01:24 AM   #4
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as long as you aren't boss and she is your underling. It's okay.

JUST BE PREPARED - (this is the part you have to consider)

Rumors/Gossip/ and if you do end up together and breaking up (fucked up awkwardness.)

If those you don't care bout, sure wtf not
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Old 07-18-2009, 01:36 AM   #5
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stop thinking with your little head and start thinking with your big head.

everything looks beautiful on the outside.

c'mon man...... we've allllllll been through this before lol
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Old 07-18-2009, 03:08 AM   #6
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my personal motto when it comes to work is always keep the workplace professional. never mix your personal life with business as it usually will work against you. there are the rare cases where office relationships work but it's always best to keep these two things divided. a guy at work use to like me and a woman at work loved to gossip and would make false accusations about us (when nothing even happened) infront of other coworkers and who knows if she said anything to management.

also, how are you expecting to work with her if say you and her didn't work out (and she doesn't take it very well?). even if you could be professional and keep things seperate doesn't mean she might do the same. i say in these situations, tread lightly.
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Old 07-18-2009, 08:18 AM   #7
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what about you and your gf used to work at different companies...

then there's a very good offer and position at your gf's place, would you go there?
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Old 07-18-2009, 10:36 AM   #8
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miss_crayon knows what she is talking about,
If anything bad were to happen in your relationship work would get pretty fucked up for you. Probably shouldn't risk your job over it IMO
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Old 07-18-2009, 03:57 PM   #9
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no, doesn't work. You end up having sex at work and that sometimes fucks things up.
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Old 07-19-2009, 08:54 AM   #10
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Unless you can find a new job out there easily, dont eat and shit at the same place.
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Old 07-19-2009, 11:43 AM   #11
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23, i've worked there for 8 months now, its career related
I would still do it. Problem with life (and as shown above) is there's too many rules. Go live a little and break some. Anyways, you're still at the age where you can afford a little irresponsibility and recklessness in your life. So have your fun and pursue your own adventures.

The problem with miss_crayon and her ideology is she gives textbook appropriate advise, but that's really the only depth to it. I guarantee you this. You can follow all the textbook appropriate rules but neither is it a guarantee of having a trouble-free life, nor a satisfactory one.
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Old 07-19-2009, 11:56 AM   #12
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I would still do it. Problem with life (and as shown above) is there's too many rules. Go live a little and break some. Anyways, you're still at the age where you can afford a little irresponsibility and recklessness in your life. So have your fun and pursue your own adventures.

The problem with miss_crayon and her ideology is she gives textbook appropriate advise, but that's really the only depth to it. I guarantee you this. You can follow all the textbook appropriate rules but neither is it a guarantee of having a trouble-free life, nor a satisfactory one.
hmm, i kinda agree with you, I was talking to a friend the other day and this is what he said "if work relationship don't work, then any girls you meet in most field won't work, cuz there're status overlapping.. classmates won't work, teacher and student won't work, boss and subordinate won't work, business partner won't work, tennis pals won't work, then what works?"
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Old 07-19-2009, 12:09 PM   #13
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hmm, i kinda agree with you, I was talking to a friend the other day and this is what he said "if work relationship don't work, then any girls you meet in most field won't work, cuz there're status overlapping.. classmates won't work, teacher and student won't work, boss and subordinate won't work, business partner won't work, tennis pals won't work, then what works?"
True, you're really narrowing your envelope there and you might miss out on some great people.

Seriously, given the right person, all the above posters would break their own rules to accomodate for something they WANT. Personal motto be damned.

Last edited by Noir; 07-19-2009 at 12:15 PM.
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Old 07-19-2009, 04:48 PM   #14
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never mix business with pleasure
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Old 07-19-2009, 05:19 PM   #15
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if both people are mature enough, it'll be fine even if you break up.
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Old 07-19-2009, 07:34 PM   #16
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Quote:
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I would still do it. Problem with life (and as shown above) is there's too many rules. Go live a little and break some. Anyways, you're still at the age where you can afford a little irresponsibility and recklessness in your life. So have your fun and pursue your own adventures.

The problem with miss_crayon and her ideology is she gives textbook appropriate advise, but that's really the only depth to it. I guarantee you this. You can follow all the textbook appropriate rules but neither is it a guarantee of having a trouble-free life, nor a satisfactory one.
we agree on something Noir.

And even if he's 30, i would say the same thing. As long as you aren't afraid of the BS that comes.
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Old 07-19-2009, 09:25 PM   #17
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we agree on something Noir.

And even if he's 30, i would say the same thing. As long as you aren't afraid of the BS that comes.
after alot of thought, considerations, and talking to a bunch of people, I'm going to go for her, see how things go, we're not in a relationship yet, but if it does happen i'll just deal with it then, she seems pretty mature, so i don't think i have anything to lose, even if she rejects me i think we'll still be good at work, life just moves on !!!
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Old 07-20-2009, 08:49 AM   #18
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if both people are mature enough, it'll be fine even if you break up.
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Old 07-20-2009, 09:46 AM   #19
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POST RESULTS PLZ j/k

I'd agree with pretty much everyone else. If its a long-term job related to your future career, I'd tread lightly.

Keep us posted
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Old 07-20-2009, 09:59 AM   #20
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DON'T SHIT WHERE YOU EAT.
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Old 07-20-2009, 10:32 AM   #21
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You're young, do it! Make sure she in another department and keeps it professional.
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Old 07-20-2009, 10:35 AM   #22
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DON'T SHIT WHERE YOU EAT.
Seeing as we shit in the bathroom and eats in the kitchen, it's technically all under the same roof. As long as they're both in different departments it'll be fine!
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Old 07-20-2009, 11:26 AM   #23
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Quote:
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DON'T SHIT WHERE YOU EAT.
How is this even a good quote? How does one equate "gettin' some" as shitting?

People pick up people in clubs, parties, restaurants and bars all the time. Does that mean, we all like to Shit in the general public? Or maybe it's just one those of quotes that try too hard to sound legitimate by trying to use wit to validate itself; with the added bonus of the CAPSLOCK.

Another advise that lacks depth. But at least its not bad as a "personal motto"
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Old 07-20-2009, 12:22 PM   #24
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oh oops caps was on HAHA

That's just a phrase I was taught pertaining to workplace dating.

thought it made sense. I've done the workplace dating thing. NOt really a good idea.
the potential issues that can arise are too many, too big.
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Old 07-21-2009, 03:28 PM   #25
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dude u can make ANYTHING work if ur willing
u just gotta trust ur gut feeling because its right most of the time. u even said it urself that u guys already have a good chemistry, i'm pretty sure u'd already know by this time if she only had the intention of being friends with you or if theres something more
i'd go for it if i were u....i'd like to hear updates on this so keep us posted.
post pics or it didnt happen.
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