When I was in elementary school, I had this awesome idea to stand at the top peak of one of these:
http://www.geodomas.lt/content/image...4a2b694ab5.jpg

... then I had this epic idea of thinking that I could actually jump off to the side of the whole thing ... well ... yeah I never made it ... instead I ended up crotch slamming one of the thin metal corners near the edge from a 5 foot drop ... rolled off it in slowmotion and was in instant fetal position for about 20 minutes.

cant really remember most of my injuries but there was one time in gr 4 when i was running as fast as i could and jumped over a short fence thing and my foot got caught and crashed face first into concrete with alot of momentum, I also had braces which cut up my whole inner lips and scraped the top of my mouth so much that it was just a huge gash and had blood all over my mouth teeth and face, ran home crying and my mom freaked out LOL

When I had a cystoscopy, Doctor inserted a telescoping thing into my penis to look into my bladder. No joke.

Iv also had dry socket after having a impacted wisdom tooth surgically removed, extremely uncomfrotable feeling, I rmb I went bak to the dental surgeon a few days later cuz the pain was so bad and he had his assistant put a gauze pad drenched in disinfectant/medicine, right into the fresh hole of where the wisdom tooth was, one of the most uncomfortable pains ever!!! After 45min of having the gauze pad in place in the bak of my mouth the pain was gone! Came bak 5 days later had the gauze pad removed
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bailing off a berm into a tree while down hilling

Kick in the balls
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Went on a golf date.
Showed the girl how to swing the Big Bertha driver, she said she was OK and wanted to try. I walked back to the lawnchair and felt a thud, and went deaf. Sat down, and saw her swinging the driver around wondering what she had hit. Dude in next stall was like "buddy your girl just capped you in the head!"
I felt hot water running down my neck and it was blood. Got to the hospital and had 10 stitches on my scalp!

Dislocating my arm at the shoulder socket was pretty bad too.

Hand + Rock =

click at your own discretion

^ dam thats a healthy cut

fuck i hope i never get kidney stones

fuck i hope i never have to get my wisdom teeth removed....i hate the dentist

What? You hate the dentist? Are you sure man? Consider yourself lucky that you have access to a dentist that will take proper care of you. Watch the video below and you'll know what I mean. Man I feel bad for them.

was driving my bike down a bigass hill full speed
looked back to see if friend was still with me
looked forward parked car
didn't avoid it. Face planted into it. Almost broke my nose, broke 2 teeth, my bike, the car's bumper, and left a giant dent in the car's hood. lol

what the fuck are wrong with your friends? Is this what you white idiots scream and yell about when you are drunk ? It must've sounded like this: "YEAHH FUCK YEAHHHHH "

some bitch in my grade 2 class slammed a wooden door on my hand and my middle finger got caught tore off my whole nail and cut into my skin was bleeding like crazy

11 staples in my crotch

My quack dentist spent 8 hours (4hr saturday and 4hr sunday night ) and failed to remove all of my wisdom teeth out. By the 2nd hour the novocaine wore off and had little effect after the 3rd-4th injections. Plus his pick/tools ripped the sides of my gums. Every morning I yawned it broke the scabs and I would bleed for 20 mins. T3s did so little.
The Oakridge mall specialist 4th floor took 15 mins and no pain.

Playing indoor roller hockey as a goalie.

Opposing team gets breakaway.

10 feet away biggest player on their team takes slap shot.

Puck hits dick.

Forgetting to wear jock strap.

Out for 30min of play.

Coming back after an intense practise of dragon boating. Pretty stoked that the team did well and I had a date after. Ran to the metal shack that serves as a the change room. As I ran to the shack, I noticed that there was a sheet of metal laying on the ground like a ramp. In hopes of clearing the sheet, I jumped in full speed. Mistimed the jump and ended up landing on the high side of the sheet. Got lauched head first into the shack. Ended up colliding with the upper part of the doorway. The sheet metal was sticking out and sliced a portion of the scalp off.

Lost a lot of blood on the way to hostipal so I was all dizzy. Even though most of missing scalp was cut clean, there was a still a little "lip" of skin that needed to be cut off. I have NO idea why the hell they decided to put a student nurse to treat my wounds, but she was scared out of her mind. She froze the wrong part of scalp. Thus, I felt every little cut she attempted.
Hurt so bad, I stood up suddenly screamed for a doctor.
Dad later told me that I scared the nurse so bad she pissed her pants.. (im pretty sure he is making it up, but he claims it is true)
He said I had blood running down my face and screaming that I was going to kill her.....
I dont remember much that happened in the hostipal as the a doctor came in and knocked me out with something. lol

Motorcycle accident 4 years ago....

3 crushed vertebrae
broken sternum
dislocated shoulder
cracked rib
collapsed lung

I spent 2 weeks in hospital racked up on morphine, 1 of which i never got out of bed.

Standing up after being drugged/bed ridden for a week causes a big blood pressure change, I remember being on the verge of puking from the nausia. Felt like being kicked in the liver x5.

This is fucking horrible too, my shoulders have both been dislocated.

Terrible pain that doesnt go away until the socket is reset.

Broken bones AINT SHIT compared to dislocated joints.

cut kick to the thigh by a 2 time muay thai world champ. Almost wanted to puke after.

WTF were you doing?...

unless by staples you mean the surgical ones

LOL, I think he was referring to surgical ones. Unless he has some weird fetish.
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I just heated up a bolt a lot with a dremel tool attempting to cut it.... and then I tried to pick up the bolt with my bare finger just now. Now I can't type with my rght indix finger henfe all tje tyoes...