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The thin line between love and hate
Mature discussion about understanding the opposite sex...

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Old 11-25-2010, 09:16 PM   #1
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[CONFIDENTIAL] Can't Get Another Girl Out of My Head

The following post is from an anonymous poster. If he would like to make a reply he can pm me.

So last week I went to Mexico for the week, before I went I have been seeing a girl (girl a) for about 3 weeks; during last week we decided to make it "official" that we were dating. So while I was in Mexico I met another girl (girl b) that is from Edmonton, I didn't meet her until about 3 days before I came home. The first 2 days we hung out a bit and there was definitely alot of chemistry between the two of us, on the last day I was there we hung out all day and flirted pretty much the whole time.

My flight didn't leave until 1am so we hung out until right when I had to catch my bus to the airport. So about an hour before I had to leave we walked to the beach and when we were there I went to kiss her but she shut me down and said that she didn't think it would be a good Idea to do this since I'm leaving so soon and stuff. So we she walks back to the lobby where I meet up with my family and say good by to her and we hug and she tells me to add her on facebook.

So I got home on Saturday morning and we have been messaging each other on facebook since she got home later on Saturday I know that she likes me since one of her friends that was in Mexico had told me that...anyway I can't stop thinking about the girl I met in Mexico and since I have gotten back have been kind of distant from girl a, so I can't decide what I should do, I don't know If it is just because I got shut down when I tried to kiss girl b is why I can't get her out of my head or if it is just cause I like her alot since we have so much more in common than I do with girl a?

So myquestion is should I tell girl b how I feel even though I will probably never see her again? Or should I just cut off cummication with her and stay with girl a?

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Old 11-25-2010, 09:33 PM   #2
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I would keep it a secret and just love girl a as you did before you left for Mexico. I know its' hard, but I think what happened in Mexico was one of those " holiday romance" things... and since you guys "hit it off" at such a late time, everything seems more interesting and intense.
If you do feel guilty about it, then tell girl a (given she's the understanding type).
Love the girl you have right now and the other will go away.

I somewhat had the same experience as OP. Over the summer I went over to Korea to meet up with a few Korean friends over there. We had previously meet before in Van when they came over for exchange but was never close. Anyways when i went over to Korea for 2 weeks.. feelings started to grow as I got to know one of them better.. Honestly i wanted to just stay in Korea and be with her, but of course that's just wishful thinking so when i got back to Vancouver i was heart broken and missed her ALOT, but as time passed I realized that, yes, the feeling was there... but it honestly was just one of those "puppy love" kinda holiday flings... it's weird.. give it some time and you will start to realize that chances are.. it wouldn't have worked out.
When romance builds up in such a short time and ends half way, it's one of the worst feelings.. but you will begin to realize that there are others and there are those that you already have that you should love.
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Old 11-25-2010, 09:37 PM   #3
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forget about edmonton girl seriously, you only want her because you didn't take a chance when you could, and now you are wondering what if... you've known edmonton girl for 3 days and on vacation mode, she will be different when she's back to normal life. i don't know how long you've known girl A, but if you don't want to be with girl A then tell her, especially if you can let 3 days with some other chick on vacation get you to stop thinking about her.
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Old 11-25-2010, 09:42 PM   #4
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How would things work out for you? get ur families to pick the same vacation spot again?

they say we always want what we can't have and this suits your situation

hell you barely even know this other girl for all you know she could have a penis its not worth it to confess ur feelings and lose everything
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Old 11-25-2010, 10:56 PM   #5
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hell you barely even know this other girl for all you know she could have a penis its not worth it to confess ur feelings and lose everything
LOL well said sir.
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Old 11-26-2010, 12:55 AM   #6
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LOL @ Penis comment. Shemale, FUUUUUU.
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Old 11-26-2010, 12:08 PM   #7
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The only reason you like girl b is that you want what you can't have. Guarantee if she for some reason moved to Vancouver and you two dated you would see her imperfections and slowly begin to lose interest.
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Old 11-26-2010, 12:18 PM   #8
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The only reason you like girl b is that you want what you can't have. Guarantee if she for some reason moved to Vancouver and you two dated you would see her imperfections and slowly begin to lose interest.
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qft.
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Old 11-27-2010, 01:47 AM   #9
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^ real talk.

How would you say you feel about girl A after you got back from the vacation? If you feel that you dont get the same vibe off her because you're comparing her with girl B then you're pretty much a dick. Chances with girl B are done son.
Also, what will you benefit from telling girl B how you feel? Even if she says what you want to hear, you can't do shit.
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Old 11-27-2010, 02:23 AM   #10
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Leave the shit you did in Mexico in Mexico.
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Old 11-27-2010, 01:40 PM   #11
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tell the women your dating here that truth.. if she digs through your facebook or something and finds out, then your in big trouble
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Old 11-27-2010, 06:39 PM   #12
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I would keep it on the DL since nothing happened. Your desires and attractions are natural and I'm sure Girl-A has them too towards other dudes. The real test is if you act upon it. But since you tried to act upon it and failed, there's another speed bump. You just need to decide which girl you like more. There's no shortcut to this.
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Old 11-29-2010, 07:44 AM   #13
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forget about girl b unless you're willing to relocate to be with girl b
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Old 11-29-2010, 07:56 AM   #14
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personally, I would pursue girl b and see where it goes.

Just my personality that I don't like to settle for consolation prizes. If I can get better, I want the better one.


Just remember this is based on my own subjective values and may neither be logical nor considered relationship gospel.
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Old 12-03-2010, 08:23 PM   #15
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like her that bad? weekend trip to edmonton man, cant go wrong. 8 hour drive or hour or so flight, just bounce on over there and see what happens. but do you think you'd feel the same way if you boned her the first night? not so sure about that.
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Old 12-04-2010, 11:48 AM   #16
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You're a douchebag.

I don't get how you could allow yourself to freely flirt when you already commited to a relationship before you left for Mexico.

You're mentality is a huge disrespect to your current girlfriend.

You might as well break-up with your current girlfriend while it's still early rather than having her around just coz you can.
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Old 12-04-2010, 12:07 PM   #17
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^ lol that's rich. a man in a relationship freely flirts with a random girl and is considered a douchebag?

if he ain't making out and his pants are still on no harm is done.

girls go off flirting all the time, you don't see us calling them sluts or skanks. why do we gotta get called douchebag for?
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Old 12-04-2010, 03:40 PM   #18
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^ lol that's rich. a man in a relationship freely flirts with a random girl and is considered a douchebag?

if he ain't making out and his pants are still on no harm is done.

girls go off flirting all the time, you don't see us calling them sluts or skanks. why do we gotta get called douchebag for?
QFT.

hook line a sinker haha your move ecchiecchi
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Old 12-04-2010, 03:52 PM   #19
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v.Rossi should be a mod

let me just drop this one

girls will flirt just to make their bf jealous
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Old 12-04-2010, 07:07 PM   #20
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^ lol that's rich. a man in a relationship freely flirts with a random girl and is considered a douchebag?

if he ain't making out and his pants are still on no harm is done.

girls go off flirting all the time, you don't see us calling them sluts or skanks. why do we gotta get called douchebag for?
don't we call girls sluts/skanks on a daily basis?
lolz.

but, i agree with you. flirting is ok because everyone does it.
as long as he didn't get his dink wet. it's all good in the hood.

though, i guess one could argue that he tried to kiss her? but, he didn't so i guess it's still all good.
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Old 12-05-2010, 02:10 AM   #21
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Hmm- just because everyone does it, it's ok?

So let me get this straight. If you have a girlfriend, and they go out flirting- you're totally chill with that?

If you're not commited to a relationship, sure- go flirt and hump every girl you see out there and I'll think that's fine. Once you sign yourself into a relationship, I don't think it's acceptable to be flirting even if you're not sticking your penor in any hole.

But I guess that's just me.
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Old 12-05-2010, 02:19 AM   #22
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Hmm- just because everyone does it, it's ok?

So let me get this straight. If you have a girlfriend, and they go out flirting- you're totally chill with that?

If you're not commited to a relationship, sure- go flirt and hump every girl you see out there and I'll think that's fine. Once you sign yourself into a relationship, I don't think it's acceptable to be flirting even if you're not sticking your penor in any hole.

But I guess that's just me.
You have a good point, but it's the intent that matters though. Sometimes flirting is more a mentality then anything else, and it's harmless, it's just the way someone interacts and it's all just fun and games... especially if they're young or new to the serious relationship, then it takes some time to settle into the deeply commited mindset, even though right from the get go they were already commited.
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Old 12-05-2010, 11:08 AM   #23
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Dump girl A, if it took 3 days to forget about her then she was never the girl for you to begin with.

keep chattin with girl B, suggest visiting her...after all edmonton isnt that far hahaha.see what happens... what do you have to lose?
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Old 12-05-2010, 12:33 PM   #24
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^ By car you're losing gas money, time, adding kilometers. By plane you're losing the cost of a flight ticket there and back and your time.

They were both on vacation in Mexico, he couldn't even get a kiss. What makes you think he's gonna get in her with this trip? That's a trip asking for blue balls.
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Old 12-05-2010, 02:24 PM   #25
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^ By car you're losing gas money, time, adding kilometers. By plane you're losing the cost of a flight ticket there and back and your time.

They were both on vacation in Mexico, he couldn't even get a kiss. What makes you think he's gonna get in her with this trip? That's a trip asking for blue balls.
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yes and no, he may not have gotten the kiss in mexico, but going to edmonton to see this girl again shows her hes VERY into her...they'd end up going on a date, and he would surely get his kiss, if not more!

but i say just forget about girl you met in mexico...she was a FLING, i have them everywhere i go...meet a girl...i want girl...chill with girl a few times...few days later i leave and never see girl again...but i never really forget about her!
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