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The thin line between love and hate
Mature discussion about understanding the opposite sex...

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Old 03-16-2011, 01:02 PM   #26
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I think most people can live with this. I mean, if my date/friend/coworker/whathaveyou calls me and says 'hey I'm stuck in traffic, I'll be about 15 minutes late' that's totally fine with me personally.

It's when people are late and don't even bother to let you know so you're stuck standing some where waiting and can't go do something else cause you're expecting them any second that sucks.
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Old 03-16-2011, 01:10 PM   #27
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Not if you have hands free! :P

But you know what I mean I'm sure.
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Old 03-16-2011, 02:21 PM   #28
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I had an ex - she was ALWAYS late. Even if it was me going over to pick her up.

I'd call her when I leave - to tell her it'll take me about 15 minutes to get there. Then give her a shout when I get there - sometimes it still takes her another 10 minutes to get down.
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Old 03-16-2011, 02:27 PM   #29
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Stuff happens.. for whatever reason. Stuff maybe he didn't plan for. Justifiable or not.. Whether he's finishing up some last bit of homework, put on his shoes a little slow, or whatever.

I mean, if it's happening repeatedly and you know for a fact he's just taking 9 years to do his hair, then that's a little different.

But even so, what if you were planning to meet him at 3, and he calls you at 2:55 and says he's going to be however many minutes late because of whatever reason. Would that be acceptable to you? Can you find something to do for an extra 15-30 minutes?

I'm not trying to be rude, as I've been in this situation before. But it sounds like all this can be prevented from a simple phone call if he thinks he'll be running late.

i'd totally be able to accept that!

i guess its my bad that i didn't specify that when it happens ALL THE TIME it gets old and annoying. i ranted cus it got to a point where it happened all the time.
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Old 03-16-2011, 04:13 PM   #30
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i ranted cus it got to a point where it happened all the time.
Then really, it's up to you to talk to him about it. It's simple, really. If you're going to be late, just call.

And I'm speaking from experience. I used to be that "late guy."

To me, it just didn't seem like a huge deal. I was always in the frame of mind which was, "ah whatever, it's just 15 minutes. She'll be fine."

Then after a few arguments, I realized it was more of a respect issue. Maybe this is what you need to get through his head.
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Old 03-17-2011, 11:03 PM   #31
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The most annoying thing for me would be when I'm picking some friends up. Before I leave I'll let them know I'm heading over to their place, get ready. (They knew I am going to since they asked me when I'll be heading over.)

Once you get there, you still end up waiting for 15-30mins because they're still doing their hair or some b/s.

For fuck's sake, if someone has the decency to offer you a ride, do not make them wait for your sorry ass. Otherwise you can go join the transit club the next time.

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That's why for one of my friends, when I'm ready to pick him up I will call him and tell him I'm outside his house.

Then I will get into my car.

Works every time.
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Old 03-18-2011, 10:51 AM   #32
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Some people are just late, no matter what. In high school, i had a friend who wouldn't get ready until the specified time, and he'd always be 2 hours late. My fiance has a cousin that is guaranteed to be an hour late, consistently. In fact, a majority of her family is tardy. She says it's an Arabic thing. We've learned to give people different start times to events, to factor in their lateness. We're going to have a chunk of wedding invites that have earlier start times for the people that are always late.
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Old 03-18-2011, 11:53 AM   #33
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Learn to live with it. Go by the rule girls will always be 15 to 30mins late.
So if you expect them to be there at 11pm tell them 10:30pm.

That's just how MOST GIRLS work.
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Old 03-18-2011, 12:06 PM   #34
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Learn to live with it. Go by the rule girls will always be 15 to 30mins late.
So if you expect them to be there at 11pm tell them 10:30pm.

That's just how MOST GIRLS work.
That's a jack ass generalization.
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Old 03-18-2011, 12:15 PM   #35
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Learn to live with it. Go by the rule girls will always be 15 to 30mins late.
So if you expect them to be there at 11pm tell them 10:30pm.

That's just how MOST GIRLS work.
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Old 03-18-2011, 12:31 PM   #36
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That's a jack ass generalization.
Is true though most girls (including my sister) that I know are always late. Is easy to go around it by tell them 30mins earlier than the appt time so they show up early.
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Old 03-18-2011, 12:41 PM   #37
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I agree.

I find being late to anything incredibly rude.

If I'm going someplace that I'm unsure of whether the traffic will be bad or not, I'll just leave 15 - 20 minutes earlier than my estimated time it would take to get there in normal traffic. I'd rather be early and wait for the other person to show up than make someone wait for me.

+ I'm a girl.
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Old 03-18-2011, 12:46 PM   #38
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Is true though most girls (including my sister) that I know are always late. Is easy to go around it by tell them 30mins earlier than the appt time so they show up early.
So... let me get this straight, because your sister is usually late, we're all morons who can't make it places on time and need to be treated like children?

Fantastic.

ProTip: Basing your assumptions about the other gender on the behavior of your annoying siblings is not setting you up for success in the dating world.
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Old 03-18-2011, 01:35 PM   #39
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So... let me get this straight, because your sister is usually late, we're all morons who can't make it places on time and need to be treated like children?

Fantastic.

ProTip: Basing your assumptions about the other gender on the behavior of your annoying siblings is not setting you up for success in the dating world.
On another note, the same could be said for when women assume that any guy that says 2 words to her is just trying to get into her pants. But thats another thread. ( I only brought this up because you mentioned the dating world, and women that assume this arent really going to succeed in that aspect either, right?)

Anyway, people are going to generalize like that whether we like it or not
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Old 03-18-2011, 01:54 PM   #40
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So... let me get this straight, because your sister is usually late, we're all morons who can't make it places on time and need to be treated like children?

Fantastic.

ProTip: Basing your assumptions about the other gender on the behavior of your annoying siblings is not setting you up for success in the dating world.
Read it again please. I said MOST GIRLS (INCLUDING MY sister). Sometimes reading everything instead on a single sentence does wonder.
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Old 03-18-2011, 01:57 PM   #41
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We are. You're totally right.

I just think it's goofy to link lateness to gender.

Personally I know more men that are catastrophically late than women.

I assume though that this is largely because I have way more appointments to meet with men then women (given the last three companies and industries I've worked with the male to female ratio was like 10:1). Not because it has anything to do with lateness being linked to what parts are in their pants. Sample bias and all that.
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Old 03-20-2011, 05:35 PM   #42
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my ex girlfriend lived in surrey. it's a half hour trip from my house to her house. Anticipating that she'll be late getting out of the house, in my mind, I plan to pick her up 45 minutes. I call her and tell her I'll be over in half an hour.

I spend the next 15 minutes doing jack all, youtubing/whatever I needed to do in 15 minutes. Then another 15 minutes after I leave my house, i told her i'm at the end of her block. another 15 minutes later, I showed up at her house and she's just stepping out the door and she saw me pulling up to her driveway. And she asked how slow was I driving to take that long to get her to house from the end of the block.
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Old 03-20-2011, 07:23 PM   #43
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If its something trivial such as coffee, dinner, shopping, blah blah then who really cares if you meet up at 10:20 rather then 10 sharp.

A simple text is all that's needed to inform the other person your running behind schedule.

A good example happened to me today... meeting up with my friend for brunch before the meet, texted me saying she was going to be late. NBD. Late is better than never IMO.



That being said if its time sensitive like a test or bus then every minute counts.
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Old 03-21-2011, 11:10 PM   #44
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what you say is true..

but..

i also heard that in a relationship.. you shouldn't ever expect to change the other person.. cuz its usually futile.. the only thing you can do is change yourself..

in which case you set the appointment for 2:15pm and then arrive at 2:30PM

Oh, I set the appointment an hour later than I say.
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Old 03-22-2011, 06:00 PM   #45
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Well if I know the person is usually late, I tell him be there in 15 but dont actually get there till like 20-30 :P or when I plan group events with the bro's (guy friends) usually be something liek 7pm dinner but dont actually start till like 7:30.. usually all the stranglers are in by then haha..
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Old 03-22-2011, 09:10 PM   #46
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It may be a cultural thing, too. When I lived in Europe, I had a lot of Spanish and Italian friends. They are notorious for being late. As a Canadian, I admit I'm not always punctual. I am usually 5-15 min late but being up to an hour late for the Spanish is considered acceptable.
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Old 03-23-2011, 01:50 PM   #47
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will never consider a waste of time as long as that's someone/something worth waiting for ...


waited a month for this hot chick to finally put out ...


yell at her being late and not respecting my time when not show up 5 mintues early... after I married her ...
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