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The thin line between love and hate
Mature discussion about understanding the opposite sex...

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Old 05-31-2011, 03:05 PM   #26
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Originally Posted by ruthless View Post
THIS
whether the "victim" decides to press charges or not is against the point, the state will press charges separately...BUT under these circumstances they may drop the charges because they are not as serious, or order you some type of counseling (even though you grabbing her shoulder is still considered assault)
really? grabbing her shoulder is considered assault? i mean i know i did apply some pressure otherwise i couldnt stop her from leaving. Does that mean in canada women are completely untouchable in the eyes of the law? wow


She punched me after, i did push her away. But not excessive like the ones you see in movie, where a guy pushes the girl and she go bounces off the wall and hit the floor. No absolutely nothing like that, more like a shove. Well she was punching me so i think a shove is pretty reasonable?

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Old 05-31-2011, 03:17 PM   #27
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i assault my gf on bed at nights by grabing onto her shoulders and wrestle with her ...
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Old 05-31-2011, 03:21 PM   #28
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Sir im gonna have to ask you to face against the wall.

why?


you are under arrest for assault
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Old 05-31-2011, 06:00 PM   #29
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Originally Posted by Tequilabomb View Post
really? grabbing her shoulder is considered assault? i mean i know i did apply some pressure otherwise i couldnt stop her from leaving. Does that mean in canada women are completely untouchable in the eyes of the law? wow


She punched me after, i did push her away. But not excessive like the ones you see in movie, where a guy pushes the girl and she go bounces off the wall and hit the floor. No absolutely nothing like that, more like a shove. Well she was punching me so i think a shove is pretty reasonable?
You have no right to stop her from leaving, period. that's why it was assault

Quote:
265. (1) A person commits an assault when

(a) without the consent of another person, he applies force intentionally to that other person, directly or indirectly;

(b) he attempts or threatens, by an act or a gesture, to apply force to another person, if he has, or causes that other person to believe on reasonable grounds that he has, present ability to effect his purpose; or

(c) while openly wearing or carrying a weapon or an imitation thereof, he accosts or impedes another person or begs.
....
source: http://www.lawyers.ca/statutes/crimi...da_assault.htm

legally what you did is assault, even though you did not punch her or anything like that
but as stated before I'm sure you will not face any jail time, especially since this isn't a huge deal and IMO there is no need to clog up the court for a minor incident especially since both parties involved feel that they blew things out of proportion BUT that being said its up to Crown Counsel to decide what to do...you having no past criminal record, and a solid job(?) will help your case,
...another thing to consider is your girlfriend testifying in your favor, that she blew everything out of proportion, and this has never happened before, you two haven't fought since, blah blah blah should also help

but unfortunately you are going to have to get a lawyer since you are fighting a criminal code conviction(don't have to go get some big guns though), that being said it may not even go to court per se, because of the above reasons

p.s. Criminology ftw
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Last edited by ruthless; 05-31-2011 at 06:06 PM.
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Old 05-31-2011, 08:56 PM   #30
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shit some people are telling me i dont need a lawyer, some ppl say i do


getting mixed reviews right now

50/50


gf's mom asked around within her close friends, one of the friend is an agent who works very close with lawyers. Therefore he had the chance to speak to some of the lawyers and saying i should be fine without one.








PS

sorry what do you mean it MAY not go to court?

I already have a court date ready the end of next month. However gf was never told going to court

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Old 05-31-2011, 09:11 PM   #31
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Originally Posted by Tequilabomb View Post
shit some people are telling me i dont need a lawyer, some ppl say i do


getting mixed reviews right now

50/50


gf's mom asked around within her close friends, one of the friend is an agent who works very close with lawyers. Therefore he had the chance to speak to some of the lawyers and saying i should be fine without one.





PS

sorry what do you mean it MAY not go to court?

I already have a court date ready the end of next month. However gf was never told going to court
and yea since the case isnt too serious you might be ok without one...i dont know havent been through this myself soooo..
like it may not be a huge trial, they may just settle it before hand, for example offering a plea type deal where you plead guilty and then they just tell the judge and you get the "sentence" agreed upon, instead of having to go through the whole process

BUT guess we'll figure out next month
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Old 05-31-2011, 09:18 PM   #32
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thanks for the great tip and sharing your knowledge



still rather worried..i guess i can only pray and hope for the best, only time will tell.
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Old 05-31-2011, 09:45 PM   #33
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Get your self a good lawyer or you will be enjoying anal sex in no time.
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Old 05-31-2011, 10:00 PM   #34
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Your court date isn't a trial date or anything like that. It's a preliminary hearing. And if they decide in said hearing to pursue/continue with assault charge, then you'll need a lawyer.
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Old 05-31-2011, 10:11 PM   #35
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At 19 I went through this exact same situation. I wanted to dump my girlfriend. She was completely dependent on me to pay her bills and panicked when I told her she was cut off.

I told her it was over and later that night I got a visit from the police. She said I had shoved her into a wall and had scratched herself up to make it look like she was beat up.

Man, that was the worst night of my life. I was miserable and so ashamed. I thought my life was over. And I had no idea how someone I had done so much for could easily turn on me like that. Its one thing to kick my car door in the night I dumped you, but to call the police after? That hurt, man. That hurt.

I was working as a janitor at the time and could barely get by between my rent and her so I had no savings account to speak of, so a lawyer was out of the question.

I became pathological at working to clear my name. I documented every time she talked to me after that, recorded every phone call, kept every note she left on my windshield. This was before the era of text messaging so I didn't collect those but had I been getting them from her.

I was hoping to establish that she had a manipulative attitude towards me and she was only interested in money, not justice. After a week and a half of her acting crazy and giving me a boatload of legal ammo I took it all to the court, set up an appointment with someone at the court associated with the crown, and brought in an answering machine full of messages saying basically the same thing about her dropping the charges if I pay her rent this month.

About a week later I got a call saying that my charges were stayed, meaning they were going to keep the file open for a year but weren't going to take it to trial. If anything further happened, I'd be in court ASAP but if I kept my nose clean and stayed away from her I'd be aces.

I kept away from that cunt, even quitting the janitor's job and moving in with a buddy so she couldn't get to me. I changed my phone number and took a very passive route in dealing with her, so much as to literally run the other way if I saw her in public. I didn't care if I looked like a bitch while doing it, this is my future and a conviction on my record would fuck me over for life.

Years later when I dealt with other situations in life that required background checks, despite no contact with her and no other legal issues, it still came back to haunt me. There were no convictions, only an arrest, and it still stays on my record.
Even when I hit the border it comes up. The border guards tell me that even if I have my file and fingerprints destroyed, that will stay with me forever.


What happened to you is a very serious thing and can affect your life in ways you haven't even begun to think about. It may be in your best interest to speak with this girl and have her turn her crazy switch off long enough to beg the police to not continue with the charges filed against you. She should talk to the judge, the crown council, anyone one who has a decision-making factor in this case and ask them to stop with these proceedings.

Talk to teachers, your boss, your priest, anybody who can give you a good character testimonial. If you think you're doing too much, think again. This is your future, your life, your societial well-being you're fighting for. Its better to come with too much than too little. If you're convicted you're looking at at least 7 years before you can apply for a pardon, which will costs hundreds of dollars, and even then is has no guarantee of success. If you're convicted forget about day trips to Seattle for shopping, weekend trips to Vegas, or a Fort Lauderdale vacation to stare at the drunk college sluts. Isn't knowing that you're going to miss out on all of this worth making a little extra effort to prevent a conviction for?

And when its all over, drop this toxic bitch. Seriously, if shes capable of this shes capable of burning you in other ways as well. This week its an arrest, next week its sugar in your gas tank, and by the time the summer is over you'll be getting your manhood stitched back on because she logged into your Facebook while you were sleeping and saw that you said "Hi" to a chick you did a Chem 11 study project with.

Please, for the love of fucking god get on this A-S-A-FUCKING-P and handle your business. This is serious, grown-up shit that is absolutely no joke.


PS: Don't plead no contest or take a plea on this one. They say its not as bad as pleading "Guilty" but... seriously... when Mel Gibson pled "No Contest" to those domestic assault charges we all knew what was up. He knew he couldn't win, even with the millions of dollars he can throw into legal defense. He pled no contest because it was better than going not guilty and being convicted.

If you're not guilty, Tequila Bomb, you're not guilty. Make sure everyone knows that
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Old 05-31-2011, 10:52 PM   #36
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sorry to hear that, i cant believe you got setup like that


sigh....sigh
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Old 05-31-2011, 11:01 PM   #37
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I thought I was gonna spend the rest of my life with that girl and despite all the problems we had, I thought we could make it work. That was a big wake-up call.

Having someone in your life means that you have a partner, a second half, an extension of you who works with you in your best interests while you work for theirs.

If you find that someone is willing to go over the top, lose their shit, and cry wolf over something so small how will it be when the pressure is really on and you really need someone covering your back in life?

I know that she would've let me burn. In fact, I know she tried to after the fact.

She knocked on my door a few months after everything went down. She had that look in her eye. The look that told me that I could either rub one out myself or get busy with her and have something quick and dirty while I put Final Fantasy on pause.

Thing is, I knew that she was dating this guy who everybody knew had herpes. Right after me she started knocking boots with him and it was obvious she was trying to come spread a little oozy, festering "love" my way.

I could write a book on this chick. Seriously. Hindsight is 20-20 and I should've seen the signs long before I did.

Let this be your wake-up call man. In my honest opinion as a guy who has been there...

she.is.not.wife.material
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Old 06-01-2011, 09:15 PM   #38
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^You should start a journal. Begin entries with "Back in '96, this girl I was seeing..", or "When I just turned 20, I realized gun shots really hurt..", or "When I found out my bestfriend was gay, I decided...".

I kid, but seriously, you have more interesting things to say in 1 post than most others on this forum do in a hundred.

edit: Your 1st journal post should be "This is how you pronounce 'Tachycardia'.."
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