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Relationship & Gender Discussion THIS SPACE OPEN FOR ADVERTISEMENT. YOU SHOULD BE ADVERTISING HERE!
The thin line between love and hate
Mature discussion about understanding the opposite sex...

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Old 04-18-2012, 03:57 PM   #1
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Who pays?

Was having this chat on rs last night and would like to see what others have to say. IMO, the guy should pay especially if HE asks the female out to eat. If they are just friends, I guess they can pay separately? Whats your view on it?

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Old 04-18-2012, 04:06 PM   #2
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Friends always pay their own way.. unless it's favour for favour.

BF/GF.. I like to split it 60/40.. unless your GF is a broke student
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Old 04-18-2012, 04:09 PM   #3
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If I asked the female out to eat, I would pay. Usually, the female would pay the next one.
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Old 04-18-2012, 04:10 PM   #4
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Was having this chat on rs last night and would like to see what others have to say. IMO, the guy should pay especially if HE asks the female out to eat. If they are just friends, I guess they can pay separately? Whats your view on it?
Sounds about right to me.

Once a steady dating relationship is established, I prefer the "pay every other time" method. Easier.
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Old 04-18-2012, 04:11 PM   #5
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^ yup
Or usually whoever has $$$
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Old 04-18-2012, 04:13 PM   #6
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depends on situation too though
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Old 04-18-2012, 04:19 PM   #7
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if its friends who are women, ive no problem picking up a bill for a few beers and nachos at a bar

if its my gf, again, ive no problem picking up the bill all the time...so long as she shows me that shes appreciative of it.(doesnt have to be sexual...a simple thank you and a kiss will suffice)
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Old 04-18-2012, 04:38 PM   #8
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friends = split
bf/gf - take turns so neither of you are broke (assuming both are working)
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Old 04-18-2012, 04:40 PM   #9
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i pay for the meal, she gives me the bj, enuff said
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Old 04-18-2012, 05:01 PM   #10
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gf pays for most things when we go out, but i do all of the driving to get to all the places we go. so i pay for gas and she pays for food usually.
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Old 04-18-2012, 05:02 PM   #11
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friends split of course. i mean i would treat once in a while but there shouldnt be any expectations between friends when it comes to the bill.
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Old 04-18-2012, 05:09 PM   #12
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friends: pay their own
guys im in srs relationship with : take turns. Although last couple of guys ive been seeing didnt let me pay.
Guys im seeing: they always pay
Guys i went out on date with but i dont plan on seeing them again: 50/50 so i dont feel like i owe them anything
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Old 04-18-2012, 05:46 PM   #13
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Back in my dating days, I'd offer to pay but would let the guy pay when he says "No I got this" on a first date..and usually 2nd date.

It's not that I can't afford it or that I "expect him to pay" but majority of guys want to be the man and show to the girl early on he doesn't mind spending the money and time on her.

After the first few dates are out of the way and things are much more comfortable and less nerve wrecking...I'll pick up the bill and show him that I appreciate, and don't mind spending the time and money on HIM. Relationships are a 2 way street and you have to be able to have a good balance between the both of you whether it's paying for dinners/dates, compromising etc etc

Of course, this is just what I've gathered over the many years of dating. This might be different for others.
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Old 04-18-2012, 05:52 PM   #14
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Sounds about right to me.

Once a steady dating relationship is established, I prefer the "pay every other time" method. Easier.
This is what my BF and I do. Or split things up - you get the movie/I get dinner or if we're eatting in you provide food/I provide alcohol. What ever works.

Though to be fair the first handful of times we went out I let him pay for everything - like Crayon I get the feeling you guys like to show off your ability to provide that way.
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Old 04-18-2012, 08:22 PM   #15
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If she's hot ill pay for her shit
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Old 04-18-2012, 08:55 PM   #16
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when i go chill with friends we sometimes treat each other and so on. but i never had a gf before i don't know what's it like
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Old 04-18-2012, 10:03 PM   #17
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Quote:
Originally Posted by miss_crayon View Post
Back in my dating days, I'd offer to pay but would let the guy pay when he says "No I got this" on a first date..and usually 2nd date.

It's not that I can't afford it or that I "expect him to pay" but majority of guys want to be the man and show to the girl early on he doesn't mind spending the money and time on her.

After the first few dates are out of the way and things are much more comfortable and less nerve wrecking...I'll pick up the bill and show him that I appreciate, and don't mind spending the time and money on HIM. Relationships are a 2 way street and you have to be able to have a good balance between the both of you whether it's paying for dinners/dates, compromising etc etc

Of course, this is just what I've gathered over the many years of dating. This might be different for others.
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Old 04-18-2012, 10:12 PM   #18
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honestly, i've paid all the times i've been in a relationship or on a date. currently with my gf she's only paid once and she fought me for it LOL honestly i enjoy being able to provide for her , altho its very minimal, i feel good knowing that the $$ im making i can spend on someone i love. It's not that she expects me to pay, cus she always brings her $$ with her, cept i just dont let her
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Old 04-18-2012, 10:31 PM   #19
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with my last relationship, i used to take turns. But it surely didnt work bcuz at the time she didnt have a job therefore no source of income. Once the bill comes and it was her time to pay, she would open her wallet and take out all of her bills. I would only see like a twenty and a ten. So I felt bad and wouldnt her pay.

I never let her pay after that, then she took advantage of the system. She expected me to pay everytime. Then we argued and she told me she believes the man should always pay for the girl. I didnt have a job as well.

So lesson learned for me, I pay for all the meals now. BUT it would be definitely nice, if the girl offers to pay once in a while.
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Old 04-18-2012, 10:52 PM   #20
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I agree women like to see chivalry but a real woman can hold up their own. My girlfriend has reminded me this on multiple occasions and gets pretty damn annoyed when I pay for a string of expenses.

I know quite a few long-term couples, some who have dated their significant other for a decade and still split up every bill. Fair is fair but it looks so petty to me. What's a few extra dollars out of pocket for a loved one?
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Old 04-18-2012, 11:55 PM   #21
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With my first relationship, I always paid, then when I lost my job, the relationship didn't last long after that.
Current relationship, when I was working two jobs, it was majority me paying, but it was about 65/35. Now I quit my morning job, and just make enough to pay for my car. She pays about 90 percent of the time and doesn't mind it at all.
With my friends, depending on how close we are, we just take turns. I also don't mind paying if a close friend is broke.
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Old 04-19-2012, 12:58 AM   #22
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If she's hot ill pay for her shit
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Old 04-19-2012, 01:28 AM   #23
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Glad to see a lot of girls input, I understand how you girls say when both are "comfortable" they would usually spilt the bill, heck I'm quite comfortable with one atm and its actually gut wrenching to even visualize her paying for our meal, its just something I cannot let her do , she can drive me if she wants, buy my weed etc etc but I aint down for her paying for our dates lol
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Old 04-19-2012, 02:41 AM   #24
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Always about 50/50 here...

Sometimes we split the bill, sometimes I pay for the meal and the next time we go out she'll pay. All in all, it ends up being even...In the end, what really matters is the fact that both of you are together and having fun.
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Old 04-19-2012, 03:24 AM   #25
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I paid about 90:10 so far and its been 6 months. After I transferred schools and stopped working and SHE started working, its about 60%:40% of the bill we split after I told her I don't have a lot of money going to school. She understood but as a man, it was really hard to tell your gf you have no money now because of school when once I could have paid the whole bill and stuff
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