no-reply tolerance

[Glove]

I sometimes get hundreds of texts from people everyday asking me questions about car shit, every, fucking, day,

and usually im all for helping, but once in a while I get fed and and dont want to help people anymore without them paying up,

if someone starts the conversation with, "hey I have a question", I will usually ignore, I dont have time to be an encyclopedia for people that are too lazy to do their own research.

[snails]

someone wants to ignore you? just talk to someone else. repeat if necessary.

[mr_chin]

Originally Posted by Glove

I sometimes get hundreds of texts from people everyday asking me questions about car shit, every, fucking, day,

and usually im all for helping, but once in a while I get fed and and dont want to help people anymore without them paying up,

if someone starts the conversation with, "hey I have a question", I will usually ignore, I dont have time to be an encyclopedia for people that are too lazy to do their own research.

Continue doing that and you're giving people the idea you like helping or don't mind at all, when really you do. Why not just reply with, "you have money?" or "Call the mechanic." I think it's better to be straight up about it then ignoring and continue letting that person think you are a helpful person. That way, people will understand you, and you will understand yourself.

If they're not very close, nothing wrong with being straight up like "advice is not free. diagnosing cost money you know?" Clearly, these people are using your knowledge and will never return the favor, or thank you in a way other than just saying thank you.

Originally Posted by snails

someone wants to ignore you? just talk to someone else. repeat if necessary.

Then you're just using someone as a rebound to fill that hole someone else created.



Certain circumstances, I can understand, like late at night, I'm tallking to a chick and all of a sudden, she stops replying. I will assume she probably fell asleep, which in most cases, it's true. Because the next day, they reply back to whatever was sent last.

But I find it rude that the other side doesn't say good night or ttyl when they are going to sleep or whatever and just leave you hanging, and never reply back again. I mean, how the hell do you expect me to message you again the next day or whatever, after you constantly keep on doing it.

It's like talking to someone face to face, and then they suddenly walk away. Okay, fine. You see them again next time, talk face to face again, and they walk away. Same thing with text/messages. But it does relate. People who ignores text are usually people who would cut you off and change subject or talk to another person because they feel they are in an awkward or pointless situation.

If they expect to go to bed in the next 15 - 20 min, say good night or ttyl, don't use me to help you fall asleep.

What Ulic said is all true. It's shows how much empathy that person have and what value they have for you in their world.

Every time I check my phone and if there is a message, I reply right away. Unless while I'm typing a message, my supervisor gives me an order to work on. But text/message sent to me never ever goes unanswered. If I'm too busy to talk, I'll tell them straight up, "hey, kinda busy, right now, ttyl". Then I'll message them later why I was busy and see if they still need anything or continue what was a small talk conversation.

In the end after talking to a chick and if she ignores me, I always tell myself, I'm willing to put out first manner wise and get down first favor wise. It's their loss.

[toyobaru]

Originally Posted by Ulic Qel-Droma

to me, not replying a msg is the exact same thing as ignoring someone to their face when they say hi. like pretending they don't even exist. it's rude.

if someone sends me "hey", i don't care what the intent is, or what their objective is.
i will reply "yo".

and it's done. if they have something real to say they'll say it. if they don't then it ends there.

if im curious i'll go further it by going "whatsup?" or "what did you need?"


i will always reply, usually immediately, but if im busy, i'll reply by the end of the day. but i will reply. i won't leave people hanging. it's super rude.

i find it reflects how people perceive you.

not replying amplifies the fact that you are selfish and or you put yourself higher than the other person. whether or not its true or not. that's the image you give off.

I know some people are super clumsy and forgetful, i give those people a lot more leeway, cuz well, they're super clumsy and not organized. what can u do about it? they are ALREADY CLUMSY and DISORGANIZED.

but i don't give other people the same slack. i know they're super organized, and i know they check their phones like 10 times a minute. if they don't reply, i assume they're doing something busy, in a movie, a meeting, or fucking a girl or something fairly important.

if they don't reply after 1-2 days i start to think they're dead or they're just being rude.

at the end of the day, i just go whatever. they have lowered themselves to the level of disrespectful and unreliable.

and i have promoted myself to someone more reliable than they are. i will always be there for whatever reason unless im sleeping lol.

this especially goes for people that READ the message (read/double checked, etc), and DONT ever reply. even when its a direct question. not just "sup"... like "what are you up to tonight/tomorrow etc"

i find some people don't even like picking up. they operate in their own world and just decide whether they want to communicate to others or not. I'm a total extrovert, and from what ive seen, most people that don't reply or dont pick up calls are usually introverts.

they dont mean to be rude, but their world doesnt extend past their own lives. lol. they typically care less about other people, and dont find it to be rude. although they should know, THEY ARE BEING RUDE lol.

they just live their own lives in their own minds, and dont feel the need to satisfy other people's needs, even if its something so small like replying a message.

i guess that's the difference between someone that shows the basic understanding of empathy, vs someone who is a little out of touch with society and other people.

at the end you cant really get mad, cuz those people that don't reply, DONT GET IT. they just dont get it at all. they dont feel the same things you feel. they operate on a different bandwidth or whatever you want to call it. it's like a real effort for them to "get it" and reply. it sounds ultra selfish, but well, what can you do, thats the way they operate.


i really think it boils down to how much imagination and empathy you have.

the more of both you have the more likely you are to reply. because you can imagine the time and effort (no matter how small or big), it took to write a message, and you would want a reply if you were the one that wrote it, therefore you reply.
kinda like "treat one as you would want to be treated yourself" type mentality.

others just... it flies over their head. they deem it as "necessary" or label it as something "little". like i said, it totally boils down to empathy. they don't see how the other side will react, and expect them to react the same way as they do. be all cold about it.

THATS my perspective. that is the reason why i always reply.


my biggest petpeeve is when people ask you a question, whether its simple or a complex question. and you give them the answer they need, and there's no reply. not a thanks, or not even a "k".

it's like... yo man, you do realise, you are using other people for their knowledge, to help you out. you can't just go around asking people shit and not thanking them, using them like tools or monkeys or some shit. people will be more willing to help you out the next time if you are polite and give them the respect they deserve.

introverts, i don't get them sometimes lol.

Totally bang on the dot man. I have to say your perspective is exactly like my approach as well! I'm always more than happy to give up 3 seconds of my life to reply to someones text.

Also i bet it doesnt help these days when having applications like Whatsapp showing time stamps of when people were last logged on or read the message and you see em online and not reply. Lets face it texting and the digital world has wrecked the way us humans interact with each other.

[AW607]

either that, or people who have terrible timing with their texts.

I remember having a co-worker text me something about what do to about a certain task the night before work, and I text him back with an appropriate answer. He hasn't replied for hours, so I thought he just left it. Meanwhile, just when I'm asleep that night, my phone vibrates (mine vibrates real loud for some reason), I wake up and pick up my phone because it may be something important, and nobody really texts me at that point of the night. I read the text and all it says was "K"

[ScizzMoney]

I must be the only one here that doesn't carry my phone with me wherever I go. If I don't want to be bugged I just leave the phone at home or turn it off. Pretty fucking simple. Keep in mind I grew up in a generation when people had "the phone" that was permanently attached to the house.

[Purely]

"Please respond"

[geelaw]

usually im okay with it, i do it sometimes. but then again im sure most of us do it once in awhile. or maybe the person could be busy

[freakshow]

Maybe it's different within different groups of friends, but I have no problem when people don't respond. Sometimes people get busy, sometimes they're not available.. It might still be rude, but I guess it depends on how rude you think it is. I know between me and my friends, it's not a big deal. If it's urgent, just call.

[Durrann]

What if this chick I'm chatting up replies once a day
Ite pissing me off
And it's through what's app too
I know when she logs in n Shieet hahaha
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[snails]

Originally Posted by Durrann

What if this chick I'm chatting up replies once a day
Ite pissing me off
And it's through what's app too
I know when she logs in n Shieet hahaha
Posted via RS Mobile

FRIEND-ZONED

[stewie]

ill always reply, but i'll only reply to the extent of the message they send me.

if they just say "whats up big rig" ill give them a basic reply, if they say "whats up stewie, whatcha got goin on tonight" ill reply a full length text answering their questiong and leaving a question for them at the end to make them reply back to me.



if they dont reply....i simply dont talk to them via text until they text me again next time...

when im single and its a girl, yeah i check my phone every 10 minutes after i send a text cause im anxious to see if they sent a message back...if they wanna make me wait and take 3 days to reply, i'll do the exact same to them...

it does get on my petpeeves when im with my gf or friends and i see them get a text, and they take the time to read it, and then put the phone back in their pocket and say they'll just reply to them later..but 30 minutes later they've completely forgotten and wont do it at all.

[Noir]

@ all the people getting bent out of shape over nothing.

I guess what's more annoying are people who think you should drop whatever you're doing in order to text them back in a timely manner. I mean the nerve eh...


I suppose if anything, this thread has done nothing but expose who are those in the receiving end of ignored texts, and those who are responsible for it

[Ri2]

when my boyfriend doesn't reply to my whatsapps/texts, i send him pictures of a knife and remind him that i know where he lives/works/banks/goes to the gym/etc. then i gps him then message him his coordinates so he knows i ain't fuckin around.


nobody escapes me.





....nobody.

[RiceIntegraRS]

The only thing i dont like is when i mass txt people about an event or something im
Planning and i need a headcount. Nowadays people that dont reply means there not coming. But what if they never got the message to begin with? How would one know? If the person on the other end doesnt reply.
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[Noir]

Originally Posted by RiceIntegraRS

The only thing i dont like is when i mass txt people about an event or something im
Planning and i need a headcount. Nowadays people that dont reply means there not coming. But what if they never got the message to begin with? How would one know? If the person on the other end doesnt reply.
Posted via RS Mobile

You did your part by sending out your "mass invitation" (via text). If majority of the people get it save a few who keep getting their texts dropped. That's their fault and they should consult their service provider for either (better service & find a different or more reliable carrier). If its your carrier that's the problem, and you find majority of the people receive your messages unreliably, then its you who needs to rethink your loyalty to your current service provider.


Also, most of the time, when you set up an event, most social circles talk together so if 1 message gets dropped to a single individual; most likely they'll catch the message from one of the people participating in the event or the other.




Its funny watching you guys finding stuff to stress about. Like seriously bros... life gives you guys enough stress as it is. For little things like this, grow up and forgo these trivial things. Oh, and BTW, whether you're a guy or a girl, people who are always stressed, fussy, or up-tight is suchhhhh a turn off for most people. If it's urgent, call the damn person. If you think about it, there's a reason why you're sending a particular message through text.

[mr_chin]

Originally Posted by Noir

You did your part by sending out your "mass invitation" (via text). If majority of the people get it save a few who keep getting their texts dropped. That's their fault and they should consult their service provider for either (better service & find a different or more reliable carrier). If its your carrier that's the problem, and you find majority of the people receive your messages unreliably, then its you who needs to rethink your loyalty to your current service provider.


Also, most of the time, when you set up an event, most social circles talk together so if 1 message gets dropped to a single individual; most likely they'll catch the message from one of the people participating in the event or the other.




Its funny watching you guys finding stuff to stress about. Like seriously bros... life gives you guys enough stress as it is. For little things like this, grow up and forgo these trivial things. Oh, and BTW, whether you're a guy or a girl, people who are always stressed, fussy, or up-tight is suchhhhh a turn off for most people. If it's urgent, call the damn person. If you think about it, there's a reason why you're sending a particular message through text.

I think stress is the wrong word to use here. We're not pulling out our hair, punching our pillow because someone forgot to text back. It's a pet peeve equivalent problem. I'm sure everyone has everyday pet peeves that they just get so annoyed about.

As for the mass invitation thing, everyone's using messenger apps now, I would recommend that. When my friends have their bday parties, they don't invite each and every one by themselves, they invite their closest friend through group chat and say "invite people", and the network just goes on and on. You wouldn't believe how many people will show up at the bday party. Friends' friends' friends' friends.

[xilley]

came here to say 0 ZERO !

[bartone]

Glad to see everyone is pretty much on the same page as I am too. The worst is when someone texts you first, and you reply but they don't reply back for hours or even days... If you can't or didn't want to talk in the first place, don't message me!

[digitalgirl]

Originally Posted by Ulic Qel-Droma

i know they check their phones like 10 times a minute.

^ o god this. For people who don't reply me and when we hang out face-to-face/they're at work/school they're on their phone the whole fucking time.

My disclaimer for the world as of late since I've gotten in so much trouble for not replying:

I'm sorry I won't be replying until I'm:
-not hanging out with my friends/family. I try not to text when I'm with someone because I think its rude.
-off class/work
-finished gaming

[ts14]

I'm not gonna answer ur text if I'm
1) working out
2) eating
3) sleeping
4) driving
5) talking to people
6) when I'm working
7) and if ur annoying me

If u get butthurt, sorry and don't take it personally but I have a life too

[mr_chin]

Originally Posted by ts14

I'm not gonna answer ur text if I'm
1) working out
2) eating
3) sleeping
4) driving
5) talking to people
6) when I'm working
7) and if ur annoying me

If u get butthurt, sorry and don't take it personally but I have a life too

Uptight and disrespectful? Imagine you're eating and a friend walks up to you and talk to you. Do you totally ignore him?

Just imagine a text as the same as someone seeing you on the street and saying hi.

Give them hints that you're busy, or tell them straight like hey I'm eating, text you after.

Unless you are in a very busy occupied situation where you can't even spend 2 minutes to say you're busy.
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[freakshow]

IMO, pretending that texts are the same as someone walking up to you is stupid. Texts are a different form of communication, and should be treated as such.

Do you, for example treat ALL phone calls as if someone walked up to you to say hi? Of course not. If you're at a restaurant with the girl you like, and you get a phone call or a text, are you going to answer it? And what if 5 people text you in a row? Gonna answer all of them? Of course not. It would be rude to the person you're eating with.

Again, texting, like phone calls, is a different form of communication with different expectations. IMO, pretending that every text is like someone walking up to you is a ridiculous, and horrible analogy.

[twitchyzero]

Originally Posted by mr_chin

Give them hints that you're busy, or tell them straight like hey I'm eating, text you after.

Unless you are in a very busy occupied situation where you can't even spend 2 minutes to say you're busy.
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Why? If's urgent...call.
If not...let them have at least until end of the day to respond.

Even if I'm busy I won't bother to pick up to say I'm busy call you back soon unless it's like my employer asking me to come in to work. It's just a given that you are busy/away....

[mr_chin]

Originally Posted by freakshow

IMO, pretending that texts are the same as someone walking up to you is stupid. Texts are a different form of communication, and should be treated as such.

Do you, for example treat ALL phone calls as if someone walked up to you to say hi? Of course not. If you're at a restaurant with the girl you like, and you get a phone call or a text, are you going to answer it? And what if 5 people text you in a row? Gonna answer all of them? Of course not. It would be rude to the person you're eating with.

Again, texting, like phone calls, is a different form of communication with different expectations. IMO, pretending that every text is like someone walking up to you is a ridiculous, and horrible analogy.

He didn't state eating with someone, just eating in general, I assume alone. Yes if I was doing something with somebody 1 on 1, I will not answer my messages until there is a Windows of opportunity. Calls however I will pick up as long as I hear it or by the phone. I don't get calls occasionally because everyone I know texts/msg. If there is a call it could something urgent. Never ignore calls because if it's something urgent, and you found out the person that called you died or something, you'll live with that guilt forever.
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