gurl was walkin2 skewl wit her bf n they were crossin da rode.

she sed "bbz will u luv me 4evr"

he said "NO.."
...
da gurl cryed N ran across da rode b4 da green man came on the sine.

boy was cryin and went to pic up her body.

she was ded.

he whispered 2 her corpse "I ment 2 sey i will luv u FIVE-ever..." (dat mean he luv her moar den 4evr)

xxx~*...LIKE DIS IF U CRY EVRY TIME...~*xxx

IN FOR THE CRINGE.

OUT WITH NO PENOR.

Cool story bro.

This thread has now become misc.

i don't know how many times i've stumbled across this post and just completely lost it. i wish i could thank you more than once LOL

Bumping this thread cause it was a great source of entertainment, and a new cringe worthy story has been posted:

What else you guys got?

On three separate occasions:

At two separate hotel parties, I was asked by girls if I could go to their room and "drink with them" and they were visibly completely drunk, told me how I was fun to talk to and better than all the other guys there in the room (5 or 6 other guys). Turned them down cause I was tired as fuck and just wanted to sleep after a long day of snowboarding :pokerface: One of the chicks stole my bottle of vodka as well. Fucker.

Another time at an afterparty I was asked to go to a close female friends' (who was smoking hot at the time) dorm to "sleepover" and she wanted someone to walk her back.

I did that. And slept over. On the floor.

:pokerface:

OMG WOW LOL PUSSY MAGNET

:gay:

Why do you say it like that, has she lost her hotness now?

At uni.
Hanging with a group of friends including this one girl that I had a thing for.
We all started watching a movie and she got "tired" and asked me to help bring her to bed.
Get to room, then she asks me to get into bed with her.
We start kissing.
I notice a strong green onion smell from her.
She makes a move.
Cant stop thinking about green onions.. excused myself I said i wasn't feeling well. Went home.

She was leaving to Toronto the next day. She texted me "Youre an asshole" in the morning.

" if that pussy smell like catfish, salmon trout or guppy I ain't trippin over no hoe"

edit: link wont go to proper time code. fast forward to 3:50 mark

If at that time your penis didn't convince your brain that you LOVE smelling green onions, then your penis is disappoint.

Managed to turn pretty slutty within the course of one year. Sleeps with pretty much anyone.

That and I found a girlfriend whose beauty is unmatched :thumbs:

Inb4 someone asks for pics...

this isn't as butt-clenching as some of yours, but:

got off work one late night
taking 41 bus home
meet this cute Brazilian girl at the bus stop, and we start talking
we talk about random things throughout the bus ride, and she's conspicuously flirtatious (sitting pressed right up beside me, slapping my arm)
i don't nab her # because i have gf :pokerface:


i laughed harder than i should've

:) inb4ban for posting locals

I was in Vegas all fucked up at Pure night club in the VIP for my buddies bachelor party. I went down to the dance floor, picked up a girl and by the time I brought her back all my friends had been kicked out for various drug related reasons, so we decided to go meet back up with her friends. They all ditched as well. Ok, we will do our own thing. We pretty much had a full on romantic feature film, involving strolling down the strip collecting the hooker cards, making out passionately in front of the bellagio fountain, drinking at every bar while laughing hysterically at each others jokes, etc. Then as the typical walk her back to the hotel room part of the night happened, I panicked, kissed her and left. I told my buddies about how bad I fucked up and everyone called me "the boyfriend experience" for the next year, and talked about scenarios of how I give girls the best dates with all of the romance and none of the pesky sexual pressure. Fuck.

that is epic.

my buddy is doing an asia trip right now (believe hes in Thailand still) and he texted me the other morning. "i goof'd up. hooking up with a dutch blonde and went back to her place. she went to brush her teeth and i stripped and went into her bed. passed the fuck out and woke up in the morning with her not in the mood".

*pours drink on ground for da homie*

Where was this :lawl:

dude, I made a spotted thread for you :suspicious:

Phew - as I was reading your post, I was scared to see "woke up in the morning with a dude". :heckno:

I literally fucking LOL'ed at this.. amazing.

Lol I did as well after it happened. You win some, you lose some. Its hard to explain, but the night was literally a montage of the best moments in a relationship in a romantic movie. It was ridiculous.