[MATURE DISCUSSION] First date ideas

[Mr.HappySilp]

For me I play it safe. Coffee date. Prefer a place with patio and in a small coffee shop (prefer not starbucks, blez ect since they are always busy).You can chat away and offer for a walk if the mood is right (so you would want to grab coffee near a park of some sort).

[jello24]

Originally Posted by nabs

let us know how it goes.

Well, I just got back from that date and let me once again say thanks to all who contributed. Great, insightful discussion all around, and it made pulling this one off a bit easier.

Now that that's out of the way, you can ignore the rest, but for those interested, below is a play by play of how the night went down.

The "night" actually began at 2:30 PM, when she tells me the following words: I have overprotective parents. I don't know about the rest of you, but for a Filipino, that means the Western style of dating which I intended on using tonight isn't going to work, AT ALL. For a Filipino, parents who are "traditional" expect the traditional style of Filipino courtship, meaning, you don't woo the girl so much as you woo her parents. No parents, no go. So that just threw a wrench to my "No Flowers" part of the night. Now I scrambled out of the house to get flowers for her, AND chocolates for the rest of her family. I head out to Lansdowne to get her a single pink rose, and a box of chocolates. Mission done.

Fast forward to 6:15, I knock on the door expecting her to answer and LO and BEHOLD, it's her dad. Jesus, this isn't going to be easy for me, is it? I ask for her, dad looks at my hands, sees flowers and gift-wrapped box of chocolates, and smiles. He says I'll let her know you're here, and lets me in the living room, where I meet her mom. Mom was shocked to see me, and to ease her anxieties, I pass her the chocolates, which I think surprised her a bit. She accepts it, and I keep the flowers with me. Now everyone in that house knows I'm serious. Her sister runs down, looks at me, runs up and I hear screaming. Whats that about? Date comes down, we hug, I pass her the flowers, mom's just standing there smiling, sister smiling as well, dad nowhere to be seen. I think the flowers did their job well.

We head out, I open her door for her, we go downtown to find parking. Sometime between paying for the parking and leaving the lot, I tell her she looks stunning, and put my arms around her. She says I'm sweet, and we walk to Guu with her arms around my elbow, talking about Pokemon and all that fun stuff. Things are starting to look up. Talk, talk, talk, we leave Guu and head out for Bella Gelato, and this time I take her hand and hold it all the way. Wait in line to get a scoop of ice cream, sit down on the benches below the Olympic Flame and get real close. Like side by side, hand in hand close. Talk, talk, talk... Make fun of Surrey, things like that. I ask her if she wants to see Vancouver from Cypress. She says she'd love to.

We head out, hand in hand again, all the way to the lot, and head to Cypress. We discuss music, things like that, then we reach the view point. It's crowded and dark, but we've already done all our talking down in the city and are now just getting close. I put my arm around her again, she does the same to me, but she can feel that I was getting cold so that was fun. She loved the view, and I got to point out the Big Dipper to her, which blew her mind, and then we head out. On the way home she got to listen to my favorite song, we had a laugh discussing weird driving examiners, and then we get to her house.

Walk her to her door, she tells me she had a nice night, i say likewise, we hug, and I kiss her on the cheek. She opens her door, we hug again, and we say our good nights. She texts me as I'm hitting Oak Street Bridge about how she had fun and all that good stuff.

TL;DR: Mission accomplished? I think yeah...

[punkwax]

Nice work OP.

Shouldn't have made fun of Surrey though. We're coming to getcha

[TOS'd]

Bravo OP, first date and met the parents all in one too!

[Marshall Placid]

Thank you for the update.

It's appreciated.

Congrats are in order...

Congratulations and I'm glad that you had a good time (and her too).

Job well done.

Guu, downtown (Thurlow?)... good choice.

Reminds me, a long time ago, of my giving my SO's mom egg tarts, bribing her niece with a barbie doll (later in the relationship)... and... lots and lots of flowers (later in the relationship).

[punkwax]

^ Ya.. then you get married. And after several years of married bliss, you bring flowers home for no reason and hear shit like, "Don't think you're getting laid for this!"

[6793026]

First of all i don't know how old you are but i"m glad you pulled it well. i don't know why everything thinks when you date someone you goal is to be urself but you also have to treat their family with respect.

you wouldn't even believe how many people who don't take into consideration of the family. If you impress their family members, your life goes so much smoother. (again, not impress, but just be respectful).

[NKC ONE]

Very well done. The whole night sounded really sweet and remember to cherish that moment of sweetness. After that its just bang bang skeet skeet and it ain't that sweet anymore. Good luck to you and I hope you've found the love of your life.

[jello24]

Originally Posted by Nodnarb

Nice work OP.

Shouldn't have made fun of Surrey though. We're coming to getcha

Don't make me use my phone to call MY Surrey boys up!! hahaha

Originally Posted by Marshall Placid

Guu, downtown (Thurlow?)... good choice.

Reminds me, a long time ago, of my giving my SO's mom egg tarts, bribing her niece with a barbie doll (later in the relationship)... and... lots and lots of flowers (later in the relationship).

Guu Gastown. I was working the percentages, she could either love shopping, or scenery, and the Gastown to Vancouver Convention Center district offered the best of both worlds, so I used that location instead. Called ahead, reserved a spot for two, and politely asked for a window seat for a date. My biggest fear was, if the restaurant was busy, we'd get a bar seat instead, which is less than ideal but still workable. When we got there, there it was, a table for two right beside an open window overlooking the Water St/Cordova St intersection. It was great work by Guu, and the atmosphere of that restaurant is top notch.

Originally Posted by 6793026

you wouldn't even believe how many people who don't take into consideration of the family. If you impress their family members, your life goes so much smoother. (again, not impress, but just be respectful).

I'm 26 so extrapolate from that what you need.

Yeah I could have gone without giving her family anything, but in my mind, she's already introducing me to them, I'm obliged to give them the best impression and to not embarrass her.

She really appreciated the fact that she doesn't need to hide me from them, and I appreciate the fact that we don't have to sneak around on dates. Having her parents on your side that early is really something that can make your dating and relationship life so much better.

Now my only concern is, as someone in this thread stated, I may have set the bar too high, too fast hahaha. Actually, I'm sure I did. But I can re-calibrate that on the second date, I think. From chilling downtown to just walking on the sea wall. That should be a big enough resetting of the bar.

[6793026]

I think being 26 and you being able to do what you did is pretty decent and mature of you. I have seen teens in their 30 who doesn't even comprehend the concept of even helping to cook dinner, bring some type of "gifts" whether it's a fruit basket once every 5 times you are over for dinner etc.

what you have shown is great respect for the family, which I'm assuming it's pure and genuine and it goes a super long way.

my x was like.. wtf are you trying to impress my mom and i'm just saying it how it is, it's called manners and it's a pretty common sense concept to treat your elders with respect like you should. Clearly I was loved by the family and all and all I had to be was be myself.

[bcrdukes]

When's the wedding?

[nabs]

Congrats!!! I'm glad to hear it all worked out

Spoiler!

reading that reminded me of my first date *choke*

[PeanutButter]

Congrats OP, it sounds like the date went really well.

I was just wondering how much you ended up spending on the entire date?

[jello24]

Originally Posted by PeanutButter

Congrats OP, it sounds like the date went really well.

I was just wondering how much you ended up spending on the entire date?

Check your PM, dude.

[meme405]

Make fun of Surrey

[CorneringArtist]

Why is it when I read "Filipino dad", and "answering the door", I imagined this?


For the record I'm Filipino so I do understand the whole family aspect. But remember, you're not just dating her, you're dating her family in a sense. Keep it up OP, my own first date went as smoothly as yours.
Posted via RS Mobile

[trollface]

You guys are way over thinking this... holy crap.