[Confidential] How to follow up when a girl says yes?

[El Bastardo]

The following is a post from an anonymous Revscene member

So recently I was at work and I started chatting to this girl a few times, I barely spoke to her as I was a shy person and just said hi here and there. As of late, I tried to msg her via facebook if she wanted to go out but she works full time and has university full time as well when finals were on so it was pretty dumb of me to try at that time. Now I was high after work and started msging her via text that we should go eat and have a date and she agreed, asked her about it again the next day at work and she said yes again cause i barely remember what i wrote

Now what should I do? I am a very boring person when talking to people I barely know, she is flirty at work and obviously I get hints from her but I do not text / call her other than a few times where I asked her out. I am a shy / boring person so how should i get this going while the candle is still lit? I do not want to waste my opportunity when the wick is no more...

[Nabatron]

get it in!

[sekin67835]

Ask her questions, get to know her and share stories that you may have
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[6793026]

FUCK me. dude, first thing you did RIGHT was getting high and just outright messaging her. What you're doing wrong is CONSTANTLY saying you're boring as fuck.

grab your balls, man up, plan a solid yet short date, keep her interested by talking to her OR keep restaurant hoping so the change of environment will keep her on her toes.

[nma]

No girls likes someone who has zero confidence. Instead of being a debbie downer find some good qualities in your self and stick to them. This will bring up your confidence, and make girls more attracted to you. It will also make you an overall more interesting person.

[heisenberg]

maybe she thinks youre playing hard to get and thats what's bringing her in. go on a date that forces conversation? or grab a meal where youre familiar with, familiar locations bring great stories. ask her about work and school, don't be afraid to listen. but at the same time don't be afraid to add on to her stories or tell your own

[Gazorcoop]

Relax. Be yourself. Talk to her. Ask questions. Listen. Share your own stories that relate that have a purpose to the conversation. Don't reveal too much about yourself early on, especially flaws. I cannot reiterate that last sentence enough. No matter how close you think you're getting. Time is the most important thing. Don't care if you get in bed with her on the third date. Let the flaws about oneself creep in over time so that it washes out slowly.

But are you serious about her or just looking to date?



And make sure to tap some bong before seeing her. Guaranteed 10x success. Until it wears off.
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[vafanculo]

get high call her to make plans.
Get high show up to date.
Ger her high
???
Go to McDonald's drive thru
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[pinn3r]

u surprise buttsecks

[ilovebacon]

I'm not a pro but you should ask her questions about her so you can get to know her better, small talks usually get her to open up. How's your day, what do you like to do on your free time, what does she like, favourite hobbies, food, what she did on the weekend ?? I'm actually a noob at this but let me know what the outcome is, as I do have problem with Girls too..
Have fun, enjoy your date!!

Oh yeah ask if she likes to blaze since you do.
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[k2_alpha]

Find an activity where you guys can talk and get to know each other.
Dinner
Coffee
Exercise together (ride a bike in the park)

DO NOT go to the movies.

[PeanutButter]

You say you're shy so anything where you're in a static position for too long is probably not the best place to be. No sit down coffee.
I would say go to Granville Island (or similar), grab a coffee and then walk around. If you're moving I think you may have better chances at not seeming like you're "boring"

[BrRsn]

if she mentions anything more than once make sure you remember it, reference it/bring it up when conversation starts to slow down

Shows you listen, and it prevents shit from getting quiet/awkward ... now if only I could do that


Also, stop making terrible analogies:
I am a shy / boring person so how should i get this going while the candle is still lit? I do not want to waste my opportunity when the wick is no more...

That's some aunty cleo type shit man

[maksimizer]

be yourself. if you be "not boring" and "not yourself" it will not last long, you cant fake your personality forever.
unless you want some fresh fahina, then be not yourself and as Nabatron said "get it in!"

[tiger_handheld]

step 1 -get high
step 2 - let that shit hit you
step 3 - write 2 things you wanna do are cool 2 foods you wanna eat
step 4 - go the fuck to sleep

step 5 - read what you wrote , tell her time date place , do the shit.

[!Yaminashi]

If a girl says yes? Take her out before she starts thinking you're a flake.

If you're only looking to date I would make that perfectly clear that you DO NOT want a relationship so she doesn't go into this blind.

[BrRsn]

Originally Posted by tiger_handheld

step 1 -get high
step 2 - let that shit hit you
step 3 - write 2 things you wanna do are cool 2 foods you wanna eat
step 4 - go the fuck to sleep

step 5 - read what you wrote , tell her time date place , do the shit.

Peanut butter jelly sandwiches, chocolate milk, sex and listening to rap music

you just save my marriage, thx.

[Ulic Qel-Droma]

k, let's be a little more constructive here...

yelling at him to man up isn't helping cuz he literally doesn't know how to.

what makes you think you're boring?

when you talk to your best friends and you're actively engaged, what are u usually talking about?

if you could list 3-4 things you would consider yourself good at, or hobbies, things you think you excel better than the average person, what would they be? doesn't matter if they're dumb. even if it's one thing.

she obviously is at least half interested or open to the idea cuz she said yes. so i don't think you need to worry about looks or anything like that.

is she an extrovert or an introvert? which are you?

stop thinking of making perfect scenarios happen, or how you fucked up on timing like finals or whatever. you make due with the opportunities you have.

anyway answer those questions and we can hopefully construct a conversation you can talk about and navigate yourself through.

maybe the you don't remember what you wrote kinda gives her the perception that you kinda don't really care (in the good way for you), and that you're not being all insecure about the interaction.

i wouldn't take it as romantically interested yet, that's not confirmed. maybe she's just bored and wanna hang. and find out more about you. just treat her like whatever. don't act any differently than you would with a platonic female friend.

[ilovebacon]

.

[ilovebacon]

lol I love the ideas that are coming in. I still think that you should have an attitude of a "mr I don't give a fuck" and calm your ass down and proceed with your plan. if it works out, hey that's awesome but if it doesn't work out, tell her to go fuck herself.
Not like this is the only pretty girl out here right??
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[jaylx]

ask questions to get to know her better. if she likes you and is a talkative person, she'll return those questions and you'll have a opportunity to answer. tell some jokes and act flirty.

if you find it nervous or shy to talk to her, try to imagine her as a good friend of yours since you can talk normally with your friends right?

[z3german]

Firstly you need to pick your location. Personally I like to give her options as to what exactly to expect. "Do you drink?" followed up by "Drinks? Food? Or drinks and food?". This is to determine if she drinks or not, and whether to pick a place that specializes in drinks, or just food, or a good combination of both. Pick your location carefully, pick something too fancy and its a lot of pressure on YOU and her, so dont do that. If you only heard of the place definately go in before hand without her. You need to scout out if its a talkable environment, and casual enough. I like to pick hidden gems that are sort of dink. Most of the time and hopefully they have never been before.

Listen listen listen. If you cant hear anything interesting force her to expand a topic, be interested in something. Everyone loves talking about themselves!

Ask her why's shes working there, ask her what her plans for the future are. What does she do for fun? If its something that sparks your interest and is possible be spontaneous! "Hey that sounds super cool, lets ditch this joint and go do that thing".

Learn to create topics from nearly nothing. One time I met this chick on a bus and we talked about her parents nursery for like 45 minutes. Yeap and i was dumb and thought a nursery was some baby care facility, but it was actually a tree growing place LOL so I got some brownie points there . Date is most likely not going to be about you, its mostly discovering her.

Try to break the touch barrier, simple things like touching her back to lead her through a door you opened for her is great. You need to establish that simple touch like that is casual for you, makes it way easier down the line when you are considering maybe a first kiss . Be yourself, a lot of guys make that mistake after reading watching so many pick up artist things they forget about themselves and end up being a template for a good date. As others said, you HAVE to get rid of that idea that you are a boring person.

If it ends up being boring as hell, maybe just keep it at that. A date between two work friends, and will continue being friends. Dont be so nervous, most girls especially if they have looks have been on WAY worse dates. You already making a conscious effort to make it a good date is a +1 already, guarantees you wont be the worse date of their life.

[z3german]

One last important thing, follow up is incredibly important.

Make a 2nd date at least for next week, otherwise maybe something casual like "hey wanna check out a movie on tuesday?"

Dont leave it too long, and it will vary with different girls as well, its a fine line between just right, too long, and creepy.

[ilovebacon]

So what happened buddy ??
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[El Bastardo]

The following is a reply from the anonymous original poster


basically I stopped talking to her and decided to party out and go clubbing instead. reinvested money into something else and handle life and my new car.

so ya, booze / new car > new girl