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The thin line between love and hate
Mature discussion about understanding the opposite sex... |
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01-14-2015, 10:26 AM
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#1 | | Official Texas Ambassador
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| [Confidential] My S.O. is ALWAYS on their cell!
The following is a submission from an anonymous Revscene member who requested a confidential post some time ago. Sorry to the OP. I've been busy striking oil, ranching cattle, and shooting pistols wildly into the air as we Texans do
My S.O. is always on their cell phone when we're together. (we live together so I can understand them wanting some time to do their own thing) but it's at the point where its up to 3 hours a night- When we're cuddling, laying in bed, watching a show, dinner, after sex etc. Its really frustrating being ignored for a phone and it gets really boring. I've tried a few different things but nothing seems to work...
First, I tried talking to them about it and they were really good for a few days but went right back to it.
I've even tried spending more time on my phone to show them what its like (but I get bored of my cell phone and its impossible to 'out-phone' them) this was clearly not the right way to handle it but I'm running out of options.
Does anyone have any advice, or any experience of their own with this kind of situation? Or am I being crazy and controlling? I told myself I want to be with someone I don't want to change a single thing about. And everything else in our relationship is really good.. so should I just let this go?
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01-14-2015, 10:44 AM
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#2 | | RS.net, helping ugly ppl have sex since 2001
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Ask them what they do on the phone. I sound very similar to the person OP is describing but that's because when I'm at home im bored so I dick around on revscene or play some simple iPhone game or watch educational YouTube videos. But I use it because 1. All my girlfrien talk about is work, which is the same place I work at as well. When I get home I don't want to keep talking about work! Keep that shit separate. And 2. My girlfriend has made made our place a mess for almost a year straight. I guess I use my phone as a bit of escape because at this point I know nothing's going to happen with it.
Is he texting people the whole time? Playing games? is he directly anti social?
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01-14-2015, 11:01 AM
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#3 | | Rs has made me the woman i am today!
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Experiencing the exact same thing. 24/7 addicted to her phone, whether it's on social media, checking Instagram, Facebook, all the messaging apps etc. or playing games, reading the news, reading stories, etc.
I do give her shit for doing so, sometimes I take her phone away 
We do talk a lot and have a perfectly good social life with each other, but sometimes on important dates or important event where I'd rather she completely submit herself to the event at hand, she isn't really "present" so to speak...
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01-14-2015, 11:07 AM
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#4 | | reads most threads with his pants around his ankles, especially in the Forced Induction forum.
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It seems weird. All the technology we have is suppose to get us closer with friends/familes but it seems to have the opposite effect......
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01-14-2015, 11:27 AM
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#5 | | RS.net, helping ugly ppl have sex since 2001
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That's agood point to bring up. If he/she spends all their time on FaceTube or insta-anything then I'd be more annoyed.
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01-14-2015, 11:29 AM
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#6 | | Even when im right, revscene.net is still right!
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probably taking snapchats for someone on the side. go NC immediately
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01-14-2015, 12:04 PM
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#7 | | Official Texas Ambassador
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| Reply from the original poster
I have no idea what they do on their phone, I don't ask or check, they keep it to themselves.. cheating is completely ruled out I don't think that's an issue at all. I know they're on reddit, instagram, snapchat, facebook, etc. I'm not a nosy person and don't have any suspicions of that kind it would just be nice to have them care that much about sharing the moment with me rather than all of their social media followers.
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01-14-2015, 12:23 PM
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#8 | | I contribute to threads in the offtopic forum
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Sounds like me... Hooked on the revscenezzz and craigs
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01-14-2015, 01:30 PM
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#9 | | Proud to be called a RS Regular!
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People are too addicted to technology nowadays.
It does get quite annoying if it's non-stop when you're out together on a date or something.
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01-14-2015, 01:35 PM
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#10 | | My homepage has been set to RS
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what if u caught her/him talking to another person in this kinda of situation? would you let it go or will it be a problem.
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01-14-2015, 02:57 PM
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#11 | | RS controls my life!
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| Quote:
Originally Posted by Mr.HappySilp It seems weird. All the technology we have is suppose to get us closer with friends/familes but it seems to have the opposite effect...... | I really like this ^^
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Originally Posted by SkunkWorks I believe cars are meant to be driven. I see zero point in having a beautiful car and never driving it. Might as well have Miranda Kerr in your bed and sleeping on the ground cause you don't want to fudge her mascara...
We go through our entire lives being told what to do every step of the way. The garage was always the one place where you could indulge in your own passion, with not a care for the outside world. | | |
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01-14-2015, 03:25 PM
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#12 | | manage the cap you say????
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| Quote:
Originally Posted by H.Specter probably taking snapchats for someone on the side. go NC immediately | 
OP, go full north carolina for a week.
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01-14-2015, 06:23 PM
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#13 | | MiX iT Up!
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involve yourself in their phone usage...
hey lets take a selfie and post on social media or play words with friends
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Sometimes we tend to be in despair when the person we love leaves us, but the truth is, it's not our loss, but theirs, for they left the only person who couldn't give up on them.
Make the effort and take the risk..
"Do what you feel in your heart to be right- for you'll be criticized anyway. You'll be damned if you do, and damned if you don't." - Eleanor Roosevelt | |
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01-14-2015, 07:13 PM
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#14 | | I contribute to threads in the offtopic forum
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| Quote:
Originally Posted by El Bastardo The following is a submission from an anonymous Revscene member who requested a confidential post some time ago. Sorry to the OP. I've been busy striking oil, ranching cattle, and shooting pistols wildly into the air as we Texans do
My S.O. is always on their cell phone when we're together. (we live together so I can understand them wanting some time to do their own thing) but it's at the point where its up to 3 hours a night- When we're cuddling, laying in bed, watching a show, dinner, after sex etc. Its really frustrating being ignored for a phone and it gets really boring. I've tried a few different things but nothing seems to work...
First, I tried talking to them about it and they were really good for a few days but went right back to it.
I've even tried spending more time on my phone to show them what its like (but I get bored of my cell phone and its impossible to 'out-phone' them) this was clearly not the right way to handle it but I'm running out of options.
Does anyone have any advice, or any experience of their own with this kind of situation? Or am I being crazy and controlling? I told myself I want to be with someone I don't want to change a single thing about. And everything else in our relationship is really good.. so should I just let this go? | How many S.O do you have?
With that said, there could only be two solutions.
1) You're boring and she finds her phone more entertaining. Spice things up.
2) Find entertainment of your own. Go hang out with friends on the weekend, find a hobby and focus solely on it. Cook a nice ass delicious dinner, but only for yourself. Don't know how to cook? Order something good and expensive for yourself. Jerk off in your room with the door open. Jerk off in front of her watching porn. Go on a trip with your friends. When you're out in public, don't hold hands, none of that shit, just go to your stores and shop for yourself.
Eventually she'll realize that she's not paying enough attention to you, since none of #2 crosses the line in a relationship that's enough to for her to break up.
If all else fail, maybe it's meant to be that she should just marry her phone and you're better off finding someone else who'll appreciate you as a person, rather than a presence.
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01-14-2015, 07:36 PM
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#15 | | What hasn't Killed me, has made me more tolerant of RS!
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Spam her with dick pics whenever she's on her phone
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01-14-2015, 08:21 PM
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#16 | | iceboy & saucywoman are my parents!
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Lol I'm like that in my relationship. My gf gives me death stare. It works.
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01-14-2015, 10:19 PM
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#17 | | My homepage has been set to RS
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Maybe mr chin is right. Why spend time and effort on someone who doesn't appreciate you but on the other hand she is your wife. I hope that's what s.o.means.
What I think is that when she's on her phone, let her know how you feel about it or try to get her to feel how you feel by going on your phone too. If she doesn't notice you try testing the water maybe pretend to smile like your talking to another girl but really you not. That should get her attention. Why not play the game how she plays.
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01-14-2015, 11:40 PM
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#18 | | Everyone wants a piece of R S...
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There are some simple solutions as to setting rules around the house or when you're together. Make a rule that there will be no phones during dinner, movies, or whatever bothers you and see how that goes. It won't work right away but if you stay consistent with your SO and make an effort to explain why its important to you then I don't see the harm in trying. Its about mutual respect.
When we had our son, my wife said that there will be no phones during meals. I didn't like it at first but I fully respect it now as the interactions and conversations become more important than checking the latest NBA scores or recent whatsapp msgs. I did it mostly for my son tho.
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01-15-2015, 03:10 AM
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#19 | | Rs has made me the woman i am today!
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I would remind the SO how much it bothers you, and just remind her everytime it happens.
...and after sex?? wtf??
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01-15-2015, 07:56 AM
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#20 | | My homepage has been set to RS
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| Quote:
Originally Posted by ilovebacon Maybe mr chin is right. | 
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01-15-2015, 01:57 PM
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#21 | | I contribute to threads in the offtopic forum
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ilovebacon knows what I'm talking about. Women's instincts are very powerful, when you hint at them, they'll realize very soon.
If she's not doing grocery shopping, house chores, clean up, pick up the kids, pick up your mom, having sex, cooking dinner, preparing breakfast, etc. etc. then I don't see it being a problem. What OP needs is a hobby of his own. Like seriously, how much cuddling do you need in a day per week?
If it's getting in the way of quality time (during sex, during dinner at the table, during a night out, during a family dinner, during an anniversary, etc. etc.) Then it's become an addiction, and she'll need help.
Last edited by mr_chin; 01-15-2015 at 02:03 PM.
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01-15-2015, 02:06 PM
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#22 | | RS controls my life!
Join Date: Sep 2014 Location: Victoria
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Originally Posted by mr_chin ilovebacon knows what I'm talking about. Women's instincts are very powerful, when you hint at them, they'll realize very soon.
If she's not doing grocery shopping, house chores, clean up, pick up the kids, pick up your mom, having sex, cooking dinner, preparing breakfast, etc. etc. then I don't see it being a problem. What OP needs is a hobby of his own. Like seriously, how much cuddling do you need in a day per week?
If it's getting in the way of quality time (during sex, during dinner at the table, during a night out, during a family dinner, during an anniversary, etc. etc.) Then it's become an addiction, and she'll need help. | "during sex".... uhh I think they'd have a much bigger issue at hand.
__________________ instagram Godzira Build Quote:
Originally Posted by SkunkWorks I believe cars are meant to be driven. I see zero point in having a beautiful car and never driving it. Might as well have Miranda Kerr in your bed and sleeping on the ground cause you don't want to fudge her mascara...
We go through our entire lives being told what to do every step of the way. The garage was always the one place where you could indulge in your own passion, with not a care for the outside world. | | |
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01-15-2015, 02:08 PM
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#23 | | Proud to be called a RS Regular!
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Originally Posted by mr_chin How many S.O do you have?
With that said, there could only be two solutions.
1) You're boring and she finds her phone more entertaining. Spice things up.
2) Find entertainment of your own. Go hang out with friends on the weekend, find a hobby and focus solely on it. Cook a nice ass delicious dinner, but only for yourself. Don't know how to cook? Order something good and expensive for yourself. Jerk off in your room with the door open. Jerk off in front of her watching porn. Go on a trip with your friends. When you're out in public, don't hold hands, none of that shit, just go to your stores and shop for yourself.
Eventually she'll realize that she's not paying enough attention to you, since none of #2 crosses the line in a relationship that's enough to for her to break up.
If all else fail, maybe it's meant to be that she should just marry her phone and you're better off finding someone else who'll appreciate you as a person, rather than a presence. | OP said "them", because it's most likely a guy they're referring to, which narrows down the identity of the poster quite a bit. :P
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01-15-2015, 02:19 PM
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#24 | | I contribute to threads in the offtopic forum
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Originally Posted by Exc3L OP said "them", because it's most likely a guy they're referring to, which narrows down the identity of the poster quite a bit. :P | Am I missing something here? Them = guy?
Anyways, if it's a guy, it's even easier...
1) no more sex
2) no more dinner
3) no more cuddling
4) no more talking unless it's mandatory
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01-15-2015, 02:30 PM
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#25 | | Rs has made me the woman i am today!
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sorry brah, you're fcked.... known my girl 12 years, been married for year and a half and I still have this issue on a daily basis.... women be womening, instagraming, fb'ing, twittering, msging, you name it
The only time I catch a break is she often forgets shit on a daily basis including her phone.... so once a week or so she'll forget her phone and we'll go out together.. but then since we're forced to constantly talk, we eventually get annoyed at one another have a minor argument, then go home, not really speaking.....
so the following day I make sure to remind her to bring her phone with her when we head out, and it's all smiles and jokes the rest of the day....
it's what makes most marriages/relationships work... minimal interaction with your significant other 
you got it made, don't complain
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