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Old 06-05-2015, 12:18 AM   #1
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Don't fund me, I'll make it through this on my own.

Hi, if you're reading this thread you all know of me already so I won't start with an introduction. I don't expect any empathy/sympathy for what I'm writing here. I just want to get my story out here and hope to make things right; because all of this has gone way too far, both the donations, and the hate I'm receiving.

Some of you might not care about most of the things I'm about to write here, but I just want to get it off my chest.

I'll start with a little story:

Mid-way through April, I found my car at night completely beaten up. All the windows were broken-in, save for the small rear-quarter windows. I was furious, depressed, but more than anything, I was confused. I hated the fact that someone would come and destroy something I loved so much without conviction. I have a firm belief that no one should ever mess with people or things someone else loves, no matter how much you hate said person, and I'm sure most car guys would agree. They didn't take anything, they just took a blunt-object and went to town with my car.

I didn't know what to do. Everyone told me I was being targetted, and that was the worst thing of all. I felt betrayed, even though I know my friends or anyone who actually knew me would never do this to me. Suddenly I'm paranoid and everyone tells me I should be, the whole world is against me and I can't do anything about it except hope it doesn't happen again.

Midnight purple, it was a colour I had always admired. Growing up as a kid playing all the games in the Gran Turismo series, I fell in love with the colour just as hard as I fell in love with the Skyline GT-R.

I went to visit my car in the shop. It was painful to see in my driveway, but it was even more painful to see in the clear lighting of the body shop, with all the damaged spots marked in blue. It was like going to see your best friend in the hospital getting ready for surgery. I was told by the shop that my car was going to get a full re-paint because of the scratches and dents left around my car.

It all started out as a joke, "So. what are the chances of me being able to paint it a different colour?"

He laughed. "If you wanted to do it, now's the time."

I toyed with the idea of changing it to a different white, to be a little more unique than every other white FR-S on the street; but somewhere in the back of my mind, the thought of changing it to my beloved midnight purple kept itching me.

I gave it a good weekend to think about, then the next Monday I walked back into the shop.

"Midnight purple."

There, I did it, I really did it. I honestly don't know the details of it all, but I was told ICBC wouldn't mind a colour change as it does not affect their payout. I paid the extra cost to paint the door jambs, hood, and trunk myself.

Fast-forward a month and a half of patiently waiting later. My car is finally out, it's the colour I've always wanted, and things seem to be getting better despite just coming out of a relationship at the same time. Everything looks good, my lip kit I spent my hard-earned money on is on the car, and the wheels I ordered as well have just shipped.

I bring my car home, I feel like I can start being happy again even though I'd been stressed out about trying to move on from my failed relationship. Later that same night, I notice a small chip in the paint by the edge of my driver door; no big deal, I'll bring it to the shop to get touched up before work. The next day, I do exactly that.

I'm at work and my tires I ordered through my workplace come earlier than expected. I'm excited, everything I need is here, I can get my tires mounted after work and I'm all set to make it to that track day on June 14th that I had been credited after missing the first one in April due to the vandalism. After work, I rush over to the body shop and pick up my car. Perfect, everything is perfect, now I can go home and quickly come back with my wheels to get everything on.

Not even a block away, I'm at the stop sign yielding to turn right. As I'm looking to my left, a car speeds from the adjacent street. He tries to make the right turn, onto the road my car is stopped at. Shit, he's going too fast. He locks his brakes up, understeers, and strikes the front left corner of his car in between my front driver-side fender and the door. He backs up; I open my door to hear the most heartbreaking creaking noise as the corners make contact. I'm furious, as I should be, I literally just got my car back.

"Are you fucking kidding me?"

Those are the only words I could say even as I tried to keep calm. I exchanged information with him; he was a kid. I mean, I'm no elder myself, I'm only 22. But this kid was under 19, and according to his license, he had just gotten his N barely over a week ago.

I drive my car back to the body shop on the same street, and ride back home in shame in someone else's car.

"Just my luck."

At this point, everyone tells me I should really get a dash cam. I entertained the idea of starting a gofundme for one back in April, but I never ended up doing it. When one of my friends' got news of my accident, he told me, "I'd pitch in $20." So I thought about it, I would certainly appreciate help for my unforeseen costs, and my close friends were willing to help a brother out.

So I did it, I started an innocent gofundme. I even tried to make it a little funny by naming it "Stop Hurting Feyris." I put down my honest description, saying I would use the money to help with the $300 deductible I had paid for my vandalism claim, and then any extra money to pay for a handy dash cam.

I thought it would only be my close friends that would pitch-in just 'cause, and that's what it was at first. One of my best friends' pitched in $100, and then came $50 from another close car friend. And honestly, I thought it was going to stop at that.

The more money I received, the more hate I got. In the span of 19 hours, I got over $700 on my campaign. I didn't know what to do, some people were messaging me and shitting on me, people I didn't even know. I felt like utter shit, it's not what I wanted, it's not what I felt like I deserved. I didn't want to be this self-entitled asshole the community was starting make me out to be.

What do I do with $700? Donate it to charity? Give it all back? My friends told me to ignore the haters, that I shouldn't care what they think because they don't even know me. But even I knew at this point, what the hell am I going to do with all this money? At first I wanted to put it towards the things I wrote in my campaign, but suddenly it was too much money. Okay, I'll put the rest into charity maybe? This is out of control, everyone hates me, what the fuck did I do.

So I'm left with over $700 I don't NEED and I don't know what to do with it.

What am I going to do? I'll give it all back.

I can't force anyone to take my money, but as long as I can reach them, I will give them back their money in any shape or form. I don't need it, I have a job, I pay for my own things, I'm obviously not completely broke (even though I joke about it all the time). I will even eat the cost of all the fees taken away from me if they take their money back.

I'm not joking, I will meet up with my friends one by one and I will give them back their money. I'm down and I'm a mess, but I can make it on my own financially.

TL;DR
This went way out of control and I never wanted this to be shared or for any of this to go this far. I made a mistake and I'm paying for it. I'm not emotionally well, so I would appreciate it if people would stop harrassing me, but I understand if someone dislikes me because of this.
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Old 06-05-2015, 12:19 AM   #2
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Old 06-05-2015, 12:25 AM   #3
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Old 06-05-2015, 12:27 AM   #4
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Old 06-05-2015, 12:27 AM   #5
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Good post. Hope things work out
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This wouldn't happen if you didn't drive a peasant car like an Audi...
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Old 06-05-2015, 12:28 AM   #6
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But no, really... that's it? I was expecting something bigger. Like donating money to charity...

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Old 06-05-2015, 12:31 AM   #7
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Old 06-05-2015, 12:33 AM   #8
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Such a good read
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Old 06-05-2015, 12:35 AM   #9
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wait, wut? you repainted your car a different colour in this whole process?!?!

I'm not gonna add fuel to the fire man, but that is definitely not going to look good on you from all the other readers of this thread (and the other).
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Old 06-05-2015, 12:39 AM   #10
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i don't feel you deserve the heat you've been getting

but your attitude just 24 hours ago was definitely not as outlined here. When people were pointing out your deductible would be covered you'd simply replied "why do you care, you didn't donate"

good on you for deciding to give it all back though.
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Old 06-05-2015, 12:43 AM   #11
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As noted in the other thread, you've spent a lot of money on the car in the last couple of months and you even wrote don't NEED the money...

...so why ask?
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Old 06-05-2015, 12:45 AM   #12
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i don't feel you deserve the heat you've been getting

but your attitude just 24 hours ago was definitely not as outlined here. When people were pointing out your deductible would be covered you'd simply replied "why do you care, you didn't donate"

good on you for deciding to give it all back though.
I'm sure you would get a little aggravated if you started getting harassed about it more than a few times after just getting explaining it to the last person. I apologize though, I lost my cool and I shouldn't have said it like that.
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Old 06-05-2015, 12:48 AM   #13
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wait, wut? you repainted your car a different colour in this whole process?!?!

I'm not gonna add fuel to the fire man, but that is definitely not going to look good on you from all the other readers of this thread (and the other).
I did, I decided to do it because it would be my only chance to be able to do it. It's a colour I always wanted and I thought it would make me happy after everything that happened.

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As noted in the other thread, you've spent a lot of money on the car in the last couple of months and you even wrote don't NEED the money...

...so why ask?
I asked because I wanted a break, and I thought everyone understood that but I made a big mistake and things got really out of hand when people I didn't even know started seeing the gofundme. I'll be honest, I have spent a LOT of money (to me) on my car in the past couple months, and I COULD use the money, but I don't need it so I'll give it back.
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Old 06-05-2015, 12:49 AM   #14
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As noted in the other thread, you've spent a lot of money on the car in the last couple of months and you even wrote don't NEED the money...

...so why ask?
It's more of a picker upper than anything else, a hand to you when kicked to the curb so to speak. I understand the pain of having your car, and completely losing it again, so I had no problem throwing some cash his way, especially with his personal ongoing problems. The whole thing was not advertised, was posted on his FB & shared amongst friends, then some "friends" got a hold of it and ran with it, here we are now. Some of you I hope to never associate in real life, quick to the draw on the drama and mockery.
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Old 06-05-2015, 12:51 AM   #15
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word of advise... stop talking...

either feed us or leave us

just sayin...

good for you and your friends... friends shoudl always look out for each other. nothing wrong with that.
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Old 06-05-2015, 12:51 AM   #16
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hmm i wonder what happens to the money if rs didn't throw you the smack down
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Old 06-05-2015, 12:52 AM   #17
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You've posted receipts of $1600+ and $1400+ worth of mods for your car and posted pictures of $100/$50 bills fanned out. Sure you may have some nice lifelong friends that offered you some financial aid and money. Taking it is one thing. Publicly posting a "Donations welcome" link and type up a fucking sappy story to garner interest and sway the emotions of your friends on facebook to donate is another.

I don't know you man but that is manipulative and pathetic. Nice demonstration of scum like behavior. If the pile of shit on the floor looks and smells like shit, it is probably shit.
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Old 06-05-2015, 12:58 AM   #18
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I can't make everyone happy, so I'll leave this thread as it is. You guys can take it for what you will, I just wanted to let it out.
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Old 06-05-2015, 01:08 AM   #19
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Seriously, fuck all the haters. You weren't so smart publicizing all your shit and leaving all your info public, and also being flashy with your money, but you didn't deserve the kind of hate that you got. Hope you learnt your lesson there.

But we're all supposed to love cars here. We are all supposed to be a community that takes care and looks after each other. But for some reason people love to feed on hate and create unnecessary drama for the entertainment value and forget that there is a person behind that online persona.

You got your friends and family to help you out when you overextended yourself and they helped you out and that was cool. What you were going to do with the money is between your friends and family and has absolutely nothing to do with me or anyone else on this forum.

So fuck you guys for trying to ruin someone's life when they were down on their luck and reached out to their friends and family.

Ya'll talk about karma. If you think hating will bring you karma, what comes around goes around.
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Old 06-05-2015, 01:14 AM   #20
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shit... unrelated. But I wished I had the opportunity to get all this back when I was 22...
But my parents were practical and manipulative, bought a new "POS" car for the family to share, and kept "forcing" me to save my money for property in the future and not blow money on something that depreciates.

Well, now I have property in Vancouver, but still have a POS car.
Don't know what to really think of it. I still have never owned a sports car...
non car enthusiasts would tell me I'm crazy to even consider this a bad thing, but my heart doesn't feel fulfilled



We should just all share our personal issues in this thread.
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Old 06-05-2015, 01:21 AM   #21
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Old 06-05-2015, 01:26 AM   #22
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Well, now I have property in Vancouver, but still have a POS car.
Don't know what to really think of it. I still have never owned a sports car.


Fuck I have had some seriously bad ass cars and a bunch of SMOKIN' hot girlfriends... but no property... and now a kind-of-shitty-but-crazy 5.0 E36 that I love.

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Old 06-05-2015, 01:29 AM   #23
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Yeah, well I'm married and probably kids on the way in a few years
I might as well just wait until my future kids turn 18 before I think about owning a sports car.

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Old 06-05-2015, 01:44 AM   #24
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Yeah, well I'm married and probably kids on the way in a few years
I might as well just wait until my future kids turn 18 before I think about owning a sports car.

Not to derail this thread further but that kinda sucks, good on you for owning property in Vancouver (seriously, that is impressive esp with the cost of property what it is now) but what good is that if you never got to enjoy the fun and fulfillment that comes with having a fun car? IMO, saving is good but enjoying the fruits of your hard work is also important. And I think the best time to have that type of fun and (let's face it) impratical car is when you're young and have no attachments. So you don't feel bad for blowing a significant chunk of your paychecks on parts and such.

Maybe it's just the Asian mentality of "paying it forward" but I would feel guilty about owning a project/fun car while trying to raise kids as I know the money would be better spent on helping them get post-secondary education, paying down the mortgage on the family home, or even part of a down payment on their first home...
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Old 06-05-2015, 02:21 AM   #25
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You've posted receipts of $1600+ and $1400+ worth of mods for your car and posted pictures of $100/$50 bills fanned out. Sure you may have some nice lifelong friends that offered you some financial aid and money. Taking it is one thing. Publicly posting a "Donations welcome" link and type up a fucking sappy story to garner interest and sway the emotions of your friends on facebook to donate is another.

I don't know you man but that is manipulative and pathetic. Nice demonstration of scum like behavior. If the pile of shit on the floor looks and smells like shit, it is probably shit.
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