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Vancouver Off-Topic / Current EventsThe off-topic forum for Vancouver, funnies, non-auto centered discussions, WORK SAFE. While the rules are more relaxed here, there are still rules. Please refer to sticky thread in this forum.
How Minions are a caricature of modern retardation
"They’re everywhere and they’re infecting the minds of your children. If Pit-Pat, the “magical, pansexual, non-threatening spokesthing”, and an Ewok, member of the original species jammed into a movie primarily for merchandising, were genetically spliced together in an unholy ritual while being scanned by the laser from Tron, the result would be minions.
If you don’t know what I’m talking about, bless your heart and promptly crawl back under the gracious rock that has sustained your innocence. The rest of us have been under constant assault by these bland yellow animated dildos at every turn, being near ubiquitous for their dual role in marketing their films and being materially manifested merchandise. Every time we see one our thoughts drift off into questions of what would happen were they to be bashed against a large rock–would they crack open and release a stale miasma as indistinct as their raceless miscegenated colour, or would they smoosh and ooze out a sickeningly sweet bavarian cream?
If you doubt that their ancestry has been admixed into oblivion, I direct you also to their language, a terminal stage pidgin mashed up from every language on Earth. It’s the crowd-sourced, more hideous version of Esperanto, and the native tongue of the Last Man. They are fundamentally nothing, without even distinguishable personality. Having achieved equality, they distinguish themselves with superficial decorations and pre-packaged identities they can put on and take off.
These things, these nothings, have no concept of time and live their life as a series of distractions. Because of this, when left to themselves they multiply endlessly and achieve nothing but quantity. Somewhere in the back of the cluster of nerves that processes sensory input into motor control there must be some recognition of this insignificance, as they have an instinctual urge to enslave themselves to any greater force that promises them a share of the spoils of vindictive destruction. In doing so, they abdicate responsibility for their own actions and have something to blame other than themselves when anything goes wrong.
So described, they’re an excellent metaphor for the useful idiots of the left, first order liberals.
And they’re everywhere. A sane person today, who recognizes the absurdity of something like “gay marriage” is literally surrounded daily by it’s daft cheerleaders, a vanishingly small number of whom have actually given any thought an idea like this, never mind its consequences. They simply follow all the other minions, seeking to serve whatever villain will feed them excuses to solipsistically succumb to their basest desires. What homogenous fetid mixture fills these hollow human-shaped nothings?"
Essentially, minions are the ultimate non-thinkers. They do not think for themselves, they have no gender, unique features, advanced language or thoughts. They are concerned with food, violence, and serving others who are in far greater positions of power.
They are literally a caricature of your average dullard westerner, which explains exactly why people collect something that represents exactly who they are.
Only in Vancouver do you see grown ass men drive across the city to look for children's toys.
Maybe they're buying them for their kids? But yes, there are too many adults that care about this stuff too much.
I know too many adults (mostly women...mostly) still obsessed with children's movies and Disney and shit. Disney cruises, Disney on Ice, Disneyland, etc.
I love me some Lion King and classic Disney movies that represent my childhood but that's just what they are...my childhood. I could not stand to go to Disneyland as an adult unless it was to take my kids.
Yeah, I'm Asian and I can't understand the infantilization of some of the fobbier folks I encountered here and in Asia.
I mean can you imagine a 40-ish year old White girl playing with Hello Kitty dolls? It's entirely common place if she were Asian . Not to mention some Asian guys' attraction to girls that look pre-pubescent
^ although I did collect the last batch and am looking for this current one of the McDonald's minions I do agree, I don't see all the hype.
Personally I just collected the last ones because I was bored one day, and I'm collecting the current ones because Multi made such a big deal about it.
But whats wrong with a small short term hobby? Hell, walk into the Lego store in there are more adults looking at stuff than kids are
Other than that my time is spend at work, or workibg on my car... So why not have a little fun with something regardless of small and insignificant it is
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by smoothie.
It doesn't matter what size you are, if all you do is masturbate.
I just don't get what's infatuation with the minions period
They are a marketing device in an ever-increasingly infantile world.
People see themselves in minions. Unable to self-start or think for oneself, most people these days simply follow whatever trends the elites and those in power above them shovel down on the hordes of retarded consumers who, out of fear of being different, simply align themselves within the narrow box of what people consider normal.
Normal, now, is watching grown ass men drive around their city looking for dildo-shaped yellow plastic dolls shipped from China after being dreamt up by a Hollywood marketing team.
Are girls driving around collecting these?
Maybe the creator is right, men are stupid, as evidenced by their growing infantile behavior and inability to think for themselves. So many baying morons in this world who simply go along with whatever is trendy and popular in an attempt to fit in with the rest of the subhuman consumer parasites.
different strokes for different folks. one may like honda and yet others think hondas are stupid and prefer lexus.
different shit appeal to different people.
just like some prefer marvel and some prefer dc. people will always shit on you.
if you really think that minions are a real issue of some sort, you are taking shit way too seriously.
whoever created minions is a genius. they broke into the market and now people love em. its the way of business, just like cars, frozen, star wars, and the list goes on.
Maybe they're buying them for their kids? But yes, there are too many adults that care about this stuff too much.
Quote:
Originally Posted by CivicBlues
Yeah, I'm Asian and I can't understand the infantilization of some of the fobbier folks I encountered here and in Asia.
I mean can you imagine a 40-ish year old White girl playing with Hello Kitty dolls? It's entirely common place if she were Asian . Not to mention some Asian guys' attraction to girls that look pre-pubescent
I've seen more 18-26 year olds Asians buying toys at McDonald's than children or parents combined lol. I've been in Toronto for the past few weeks on a project and never see stuff like that here - even from Asians. I get the feeling that it's a byproduct of most Vancouverites living at home well into their 30s and having way too much time on their hands with not having to cook, get groceries, do laundry and whatnot.
. I get the feeling that it's a byproduct of most Vancouverites living at home well into their 30s and having way too much time on their hands with not having to cook, get groceries, do laundry and whatnot.
FYI: I'm Asian.
I believe this is the same similar thing that is fueling white bronies.
I just don't get what's infatuation with the minions period
i haven't even seen any of those despicable me or minion or whatever the fuck movies yet so i genuinely have no clue what is going on or why people are going nuts for these toys.
i remember when mcd had hot wheels. i went nuts for those fucking things but i was also a kid then..
LOL the Vigilant Christian! What a nutbar. His videos are easily ripped apart by the Drunken Peasants on their 3 weekly podcasts. He refuses to debate them because he knows he will be destroyed. I never thought anyone would take that guy seriously but I forger CiC still hangs out here.
LOL the Vigilant Christian! What a nutbar. His videos are easily ripped apart by the Drunken Peasants on their 3 weekly podcasts. He refuses to debate them because he knows he will be destroyed. I never thought anyone would take that guy seriously but I forger CiC still hangs out here.
I think it's more likely that he's doing it for pure entertainment, and the only nutbars are the ones who take him seriously.
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Some people are insecure and think growing up means getting rid of what they found joy in, they're afraid to be seen as morons, idiots, etc. so they shun anything they deem could give people that impression, and even talk down about others who don't ascribe to their view of what's proper.
It's the same thing that happened in high school with cliques, a lot of people were afraid and insecure so they shunned some groups to look cooler in others.
That may be hard to accept because basically what ^^^ that is saying is you're still an insecure child trying to fit in, but in an adults body.
Others don't see a connection between joy, and age, and really couldn't care less about what people thought of them... what makes them happy makes them happy.
Those who hate on Minion lovers fall into the first group, and those who like Minions fall into both groups
I don't like/dislike minions btw, I preferred the evil scientist in despicable me
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