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>> >>THE PENIS WANTS A RAISE >> >> >I, the Penis, hereby request a raise in >> >> >salary for the following reasons. >> >> >I do physical labor. >> >> >I work at great depths. >> >> >I plunge head first into everything I >> >> >do. >> >> >I do not get weekends or public holidays >> >> >off. >> >> >I work in a damp environment. >> >> >I work in a dark workplace that has poor >> >> >ventilation. >> >> >I work in high temperatures. >> >> >My work exposes me to contagious >> >> >diseases. >> >> >> > >> >> > >> >> >THE RESPONSE: >> >> >Dear Penis: >> >> > >> >> >After assessing your request, and >> >> >considering the arguments you >> >> >have raised, the administration rejects >> >> >your request for the following >> >> >reasons: >> >> > >> >> >You do not work 8 straight hours. >> >> >You >> >>fall asleep after brief work >> >> >periods. >> >> >You do not always follow orders of >> >>the >> >> >management team. >> >> >You do not stay in your designated area >> >> >and are often seen >> >> >visiting other locations. >> >> >You do not take initiative. >> >> >You need to be pressured and stimulated >> >> >in order to start working. >> >> >You leave the workplace rather messy >>at >> >> >the end of your shift. >> >> >You don't always observe necessary >> >> >safety requirements, such as wearing >> >> >the correct protective clothing. >> >> >You will retire well before you are 65. >> >> >You are unable to work double shifts. >> >> >You sometimes leave your designated work >> >> >area before you have completed >> >> >the assigned task. >> >> >And if that were NOT ALL, you have been >> >> >seen constantly entering and >> >> >exiting the workplace carrying two >> >> >> >> >suspicious looking bags. >> >> > >> >> >Sincerely, >> >> >The Management. :D |
^^ hahahaha, nice. where'd u find that? |
PIMP |
haha funny |
hmmmm :D:D:D isnt' today a wonderful day? :D turns out it looks like TWO of my articles will be published in the next issue of one magazine...and another magazine will publish one of those as well ;) can't say which mag yet, but you'll be the first to know when it comes out :D |
umm...a friend of mine from the Island sent it to me hahaha...I usually can't stand forwards, but this one was great :D |
my girlfriend is moving to vancouver... we mutually let eachother go tonight, it was hard as hell... it's ecspecially tough when in the same week you find out your parents are getting a divorce after 23 years, and your close-uncle has cancer.. sorry for being personal on here but i'm just feeling messed up right now and don't know what to do.. |
man, thats some hard shit to swallow, stick in there buds |
Kind of a mellow moment for me looking over all my recent bank statements. Seems to be that I cant handle money very well. It just "dissapears" I got a visa a month or 2 back, and ever since than, I've had a problem catching up on it. I keep getting more and more in depth and its really starting to suck. I pay it completely on pay-day, but than I'm broke for the 2 weeks... so I use the visa and it happens again! I'll finally get it paid up and "oh wait!" I'll find something on ebay, or a website... mabye even a sweet deal at lordco or at work... and I just gotta have it. So far I got a new tool chest, and loaded the sucker with all brand new tools. Mastercraft everything... SAE and Metric pro series wrenches, titanium drill bits, mastercraft cordless drill, complete 30 piece top of the line mastercraft screwdriver set, set of allen keys, electrical tape, digital multimeter, 2 12v test lights, 3 bags of zap-straps, Dremel with the accessory kit and thats it. I'll still be needing a torque wrench (ft/p), pliers, vice gribs, digital micrometer, torch, welder... all the small stuff... Damn this is an expensive obsession! To top it off... everything is neatly organized... untouched... never been used... I'd like to completely build up my tools before they get used... but when am I going to stop? This is completely dumb and everything "should" go back. I need a better paying job... anyone hiring? |
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I'll use this thread I guess to ask if anyone has Jaques email addy or if they know how to get ahold of him? PM'd him a few times but no respones outta the guy |
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and another remix of his State of the Union speech a year or two ago http://politicalhumor.about.com/gi/d...address2.shtml |
So I got suckered into talking about the benefits of working at Convergys on the River with Mike Pearson at 12:30 today. |
went to bed last night feeling perfectly healthy, woke up this morning sick as hell.. |
it's the underwear gnomes...they're expanding their operations ;) |
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coming to kelowna for a week this monday. going to be weird back in ktown |
Saweeeet! First week in Australia there's the Australian International Motor Show :D http://carsguide.news.com.au/aims/ |
*sigh*....one of my ex's best friends just killed herself two days ago....she just found out. Dunno why I'm posting....but this sucks |
Geez... That sux. Sorry to hear man. |
Thanks man...it's all good...I just feel so fucking bad for my ex...she's been through hell and back so many times this year I've lost count. To make matters worse her friend left her a personalized letter....she's stronger than I am tha'ts for sure...I don't know if I could read a letter from the dead....it's just fucked up. |
well i have 4 beers in me, I'm so deaf i can bearly hear the keys on the keyboard making noise, and Amanda:Rude&Dave Dub ROCKED higher ground tonight. fuck ya speed garage and funky breaks up in yo face |
wrong thread, bud ;) :lol w00t...hanging in Nanaimo...waited for 3hrs in the bloody ferry terminal....Van traffic was fun too....oh well....1 1/2 more days w/ my truck :( |
so, i'm looking into taking off out of kelowna for a while for a change.. i'm really not feeling this city right now and haven't had anything good happen here for a while.. anyone know of any solid job opportunities in the vancouver area? i am in desperate need of a change to see whats out there.. if anyone has any information for me PM's would be great.. appreciate it. |
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