that shit doesnt work, i've tried almost all types of tylenol, it helps a bit but no dice. and no advil for me.

here's one for those of you who have trouble getting up in the morning

- When your alarm goes off, jump out of bed right away, splash some cold water in your face, jump back into bed and listen to the radio/some music. instead of waking up naturally (which takes years while you moan and groan about how tired you are), you get up and splash water on your face with the satisfaction in knowing that you'll be back in bed in a few seconds. then, when you're back in bed, the wake up naturally process is sped up due to the music and the water you splashed on your face

edit//

also, these:

-The caffeine nap : caffeine takes ~15-20 minutes to kick in. If you are feeling really tired, drink a cup of coffee and then take a light, 15-20 minute nap. You will wake up incredibly refreshed and awake.

-If you have chest congestion, drum on your chest lightly but rapidly. Same thing goes for a dry or gooey throat; drum lightly but rapidly on your windpipe. Just drum for ~30s and then wait a minute or two for it to kick in. The effect will last 5-10 minutes before you start getting the feeling again. Repeat until you feel better.

-If you have to drive a very long distance, and you're worried about falling asleep at the wheel, get a huge bag of sun flower seeds. Put a handful at a time in your cheek and then one by one move them into your mouth, crack the shell, eat the kernel, and spit out the shell. The constant movement and focusing will keep you awake.

eddited the main post and added those

A bunch of random shit I found on the *chans

http://members.optusnet.com.au/argyle85/index.html

Just wondering, how much faster (WPM) are we talking? Also did you ever play with DVORAK as well? I've been tempted to try it out as well but I'm afraid it'll eventually mess up my QWERTY skills.

I briefly considered Dvorak, but the remapping of a lot of the windows hotkeys is a pain. Without getting into too much details, Dvorak is a great layout for typewriters.

The initial learning curve is annoying for about 1-2weeks, but considering I'm going to be using a computer for pretty much the rest of my life, its a small investment.

Obviously when a new idea or a new way of doing something comes out the first thing to do is to dismiss it without even giving it any thought.

The biggest difference is the ergonomics and comfort. Fingers move a LOT less and most of the typing is focused on the homerow. I type at about 120wpm with Colemak and sit at 70wpm with QWERTY. I used to be at 100wpm qwerty. For me, the only keyboards I use are my laptop and computer at work. If I need to type on a regular keyboard then it's still fine, just a bit slower. On average, most people use just 2-3 computers on a regular basis.

It's just so.. pointless.

As pointless as covering one eye with your hand and leave it there until you return to darkness so you will not run into the dresser on your way back to bed? Sure.

Anyway, yes it's useless. Carry on.

^ I turn on the light...

I know my house well enough that I know where everything will pretty much be in the dark

You can trick the traffic lights at intersections where there are left turn lanes and a dedicated left turn signal lights. if you see tar circles on the left turn lane, it indicates that there are sensors underneath. Every sensor is about half a car length. So, if there are 8 sensors, you would supposedly need 4 cars on queue to trigger the left turn light. However, you can usually make the light come on with only two cars. One car on the first two sensors and another car at the last two sensors.

^ get the passenger to hop out and hit the button if it's a light that almost never changes. I check for cars and jump out of my friends cars to go hit the button if it's late with no traffic.

he's talking about lights that have dedicated left turn signals, not just lights that don't change

also, with some lights, they go by the hour of the day (ie - rush hour)

I don't care what keyboard it is. As long as it lets me type and search for porn I'm good!

pee b4 masturbate

honestly, in the time you've sat there and re-mapped all your keys using whatever software/harware interfacer (assuming for every new keyboard you've used), you've not only made up the typing time from 100WPM to 70WPM, you've also pretty much gone ahead and saved yourself more hassel when the new OS's won't support what you're doing. Conformity, and learning to beat that conformity is what Computers should be about...

that being said, being IT, i can't possibly have any different... and the best keyboards ever are the sony laptops...

Yes I know, but that's a lot easier than trying to line up two cars.

I wonder if a cop spots a car trying to cheat the advance green, if they'd pull it over..

Here's a new trick for you. If you fart and it stinks real bad, you have to do a barrel roll to get rid of the smell.

























Happy April's fools day.

on the serious note this is how you get away from your fart fast, scientifically proven:
YouTube- Fart

yeah, but i think what he means is this:
the left turn designated signal (at some lights) will only come on when there's lots of cars waiting to turn left. so getting out to push the button in this scenario isn't gonna trigger the left turn signal light, it'll just turn the light green

i'm pretty sure there's no laws being broken

^ yes, but usually somewhere along the line of the light changing green, you should get a left turn arrow or at least a solid green for the left turn. There has always got to be a way for a single car to make a legal left turn at an intersection, otherwise you'd be there for hours. so it should just be a matter of speeding up the process.

This is how i pull it off:

Stop infront of the last sensor, when another car drives by to turn behind you, wait till they stop and move to the first sensor. They usually catch on and stay put.

Anybody got a life hack for those insanely painful foot spazzes?
Only thing that helps me with it is pulling up my big toe to stretch it.
Less painful but still hurts like hell.

^ weird, i was actually digging for one a few days ago cause i had one and wanted to know how to get rid of it fast in the future

didn't come up with anything, but hopefully somebody else can find something

anyway, here's a few more
main post has been updated again

-Raw organic coconut oil is anti viral, anti microbial, anti fungal, you can use it inside and out. Also swishing it 15 minutes in your mouth and spitting it whitens your teeth

-If you live in a cold area, find a way to keep your room warm while you sleep. Breathing in cold air while you sleep is the easiest way to get sick.

-Tired of phone menus when you call in for something? Asterisk (*) and zero are the most common short-circuit buttons. Sometimes the pound sign (#).

-Your car battery is getting old, hmmm? Not a lot of cranking power left, and it's cold out. AND you have to fire that sucker up and be on your way at 3 a.m. Try this: before turning the key, turn the headlights on for a few seconds. It might seem counter-intuitive, but it works. This process is called "boot-strapping," as in "picking yourself up by the bootstraps." It warms the battery slightly and provides a bit more cranking amps for the initial starting attempt.

-Don't baby your car during the break in period. It is not bad to bring the engine to redline every now and then. It is actually good for the engine, proven by many people, that the engine seals expand much better when it is exposed the full range of what it is capable of. The thing you don't want to do is keep it under 3000 rpm during break-in, because I guarantee you that your piston rings wont seat evenly. Highway driving is bad for new cars, because usually you'll drive at a fixed RPM, which means again, the piston rings will not seal fully and you'll burn oil in the later days.

-Before you go to bed when you're drunk, chug a big glass of water and eat a banana. If you don't like bananas then take a pill with potassium, and eat a package of soda crakers. The big glass of water is going to wake you up in about 3 hours to go take a pee. When you pee, chug another glass of water. You should wake up after about 6-8 hours with no hangover, works incredibly well.

-Brush your tongue if you want your bad breath to go away. Not the front, way in the back. If you want to eat spicy foods but are a total wuss, do not let the hot part of the food touch the rear sides of your tongue because that is where the tastebuds that detect spiciness reside.

-When you blow your nose, keep your mouth open a bit. You can actually pop (as in, put a hole in) your eardrum if you do not.

-Do not shake nail polish before applying them, doing so makes air bubbles appear. Roll them gently in your hands instead.

-There's a color code subtly incorporated through the bread tie to tell when a loaf of bread was baked. The color of the tie represents the day on which the bread was baked:

++ Monday - blue
++ Tuesday - green
++ Thursday - red
++ Friday - white
++ Saturday - yellow

-When microwaving leftover pizza, it tastes best if you wrap the slice in a damp paper towel.

-Running is bad for your knees over a long period of time. Biking is better.

-To stop a coughing fit (when you swallow liquid): breathe in deeply and hold your breathe for ten seconds, then you should feel ready to make one good cough to clear your throat. Breathe in and out slowly until the spasm passes.

-If you ever feel sick to your stomach, suck on an orange peel. The acid will reduce the sick feeling.

-To clear your sinuses, eat a lot of wasabi. It will hurt tons, but your sinuses clear almost instantaneously.

-Use warm water to brush your teeth, it softens the bristles so you can have an easier time massaging the gumline. Then rinse with cold water, which refreshes and makes everything contract back up.

-If you or someone you know gets mugged, has their purse snatched, whatever, if you look around in dumpsters and trash cans within the next block or two you'll probably find the wallet/purse. It won't have any cash in it (and maybe not any credit cards), but at least you won't have to replace your driver's license, ID cards, library cards, whatever, which is 99% of the pain in the neck about being robbed (aside from the victimization thing).

-High school teachers are pretty wise to whole "increase font size" or "increase margins" thing, but none of them seem to get the whole "increase space between letters ever so slightly, making the paper pages longer" thing.

-If you ever spill red wine on light carpet, shaving cream will get the stain out pretty well.

-Lemons can be used for a lot of things. Make shoes look like new, get rid of coffee/tea stains on old mugs, rust (put a lemon drenched cotton ball on the rust spot overnight), polish copperware, etc.

-Super cleaning, sticker removal, stain removal and more! -- Lighter Fluid, the kind you put in your zippo. Its a great solvent, it cleans plastics, melts the glue on stickers and always evaporates away to nothing. It's good at getting tar and oil out of clothes, and its a great degreaser for mechanical stuff. Its also cheap. Brilliant for taking the price tags off gifts, even book covers.

-Toothpaste will take scratches out of CDs. Buff from the centre outward with a clean, soft cloth or sock. Only regular toothpaste, not the gelly kind.

-When putting in an earring, or any ring for that matter, instead of poking at your ear with the stud, lick your thumb and index finger, or wet them with water, wet where the hole is, and put the stud in. It'll open up the hole so you're not fiddling around at it with the stud.


long ass read, but i basically took the best tips i've been finding, and it's definitely worth the read

How the fuck can you blow your nose with your mouth open?

how can't you =\