Hilarious Review of Fatty Cow Hot Pot
 

So I was mentioning to a few friends we should go for hot pot at Fatty Cow and one of my friends decides he wanted to do a review check of this place and this came up from Yelp, I found it pretty amusing haha:

PS: Im not meaning to bash on Fatty Cow but this was just too funny of a rant

Fatty Cow Seafood Hot Pot - Kensington-Cedar Cottage - Vancouver, BC

User: Johnson C.
Posted: 9/26/2011

Full disclosure: I don't like hot pot. Very few years or so, I get some hot pot and then remember why I don't go for it... at all. It's a like a reaffirmation of my anti-hot pot vow. I know - you're doubting how Chinese I am, but there it is...

Before I begin - here's why hot pot sucks:
1) I go out to eat because (a) I'm too lazy to make a meal, (b) I can't cook for shit or (c) a combination of (a) and (b). Cooking my own food like a chump? FUCK THAT.
2) Boiling flavourless meat. In a cesspool of other random shit. Think about that one for second... for the same reason why I don't go to public baths, hot springs, or Jacuzzis because I don't want to simmer in a bacteria bath of ass juice with strangers -- I don't want to eat something slightly tainted with everything else that was previously introduced to the broth.
3) I always end up as the garbage can. Yes, I eat a lot and am a strong anchor in any AYCE/'Hey-Johnson-I-can't-finish-my-____' situation - a task I usually take on with glee. But when you want me to finish some shitty overcooked beef balls that have absorbed all 'flavor' from the crap that came before... ya, I have some balls for you eat; and I can guarantee they are cleaner and more flavourful.

Having said that - yes, I've had mind-blowing 'hot pot' experiences before - but they were (prepared) Vietnamese lau or shabu-shabu. Chinese hot-pot... the shame of a nation.

[END GENERAL HOT POT RANT]

Things I didn't like:
- we tried to go for a 6:30 reservation, they told us to come at 8:30. I didn't want to go for AYCE that late but I hate waiting even more, so I was okay with the late time if it guaranteed us a table. We showed up on time and waited another 30 minutes. Why the hell would you tell us to come later just to wait anyways?
- some cuts of meat were crappy; beef cubes appeared to be end trimmings - and dumplings were not properly thawed out - but the rest was mostly passable
- ~$20 per person for all-you-can-eat is about standard - but it's +$8 or so if you want flavoured broth. Seriously - who would go hot pot with plain water? Of course you have to add that on. This bring price closer to ~$25/person (if you have a small party). The four of us spent ~$120 + tips with a few beers. Much better meals can be had at this price point and Posh is way cheaper (and you get free eggs).
- no credit cards - I understand why most places don't take credit card and I'm totally cool with cash-only (standard for a lot of Asian places) - but these are usually for cheap joints. But at over $20/head - come on, I have break open my brick?
- broth was under-flavoured; refills were with generic broth mix so it got even more diluted. Think we had satay and something else - I couldn't taste the difference no matter which side of the pot it was cooked in.

Things I liked:
- beer is ~$4 for domestic bottle - pretty standard Chinese joint pricing, but it's a plus
- they didn't flinch when I told them we overordered (the quickest way to sate me is to feed me meh food) and just took back some of the meat slices from our table.
- open until 1AM on the weekends

I was told that Fatty Cow is one of the better hot pot joints in town (especially since Posh has gone downhill) - that may be so, but I won't be returning anytime soon. But you know how much I *love* hot pot.

:fuckthatshit:
fatty cow still best

I'm craving Fatty Cow now...

he thinks hot pot is basically a bacterial cesspool, yet he says he likes shabu-shabu?

:suspicious:

^shabu shabu it's your own spit, saliva etc. whereas in hot pot you're dipping things in with 4+ people...could be what he means

Other than the cesspool part ( idon't really care about that) all those erasons are why i hate hot pot as well hahaha

You know it is a troll review since he complained the dumplings were still frozen. :heckno:

how was that "hilarious"? seems like a typical review to me

best hot pot place IMO is Landmark, mind you they're not AYCE and expensive as fuck

is chubby lamb still good? the one on alexandra

^ +1 Landmark. Always go there.

Mongolian Little Sheep Hot Pot
(lansdowne mall)

i love their
- beer marinated lamb
- mongolian beef pancake

freaking expensive, but FREAKING good! :alonehappy:

Without me. :alone:

HKYK is so hard to resist though. It's dirty, and the meat quality is suspect.. BUT they have AYCE Fried/Steamed buns with condensed milk... :sweetjesus:

When I said I always go there, I meant I always go across the street to eat and watch the people in Landmark eat. I pretend I am eating what they are eating. :alonehappy:

Thats not hilarious at all

Garden City Hot Pot or Topgun (before it turned AYCE)

Johnson obviously has never been to hotpot with Hyde *waits for lobster comment*

The last time I went to Fatty cow is probably the last time I will ever go.

Everything tasted like it has been in the freezer for way too long. There was no fried fish skin. Service was crap. I felt rushed the whole time and the ladies gave us attitude the whole time.

Why go out for hotpot when you can have it at home for 1/3 the price? I always have left over to cook noodles with for the next few days too....=\

Hot Pot One in Aberdeen Center is really good.

The service is awesome and the food taste fresh.

http://hotpotone.com/

Someone please explain to a white person why you wouldn’t take credit cards? This is normal for Chinese places?

hot pot is just as bad as korean food.

Last time I went to hotpot was at Fatty Cow.
Only cause a family thing and parents paying for the family. I would never go with a group of friends, cause I don't like hotpot that much to think it's worth it.

I rather go shabusen and eat some bbq ribs.


I believe it's cause the restaurant has to pay some fee to be credit card accessible?
And many Chinese places are just too cheap to do it.

Some Chinese restaurants accept cash payment only because they are being dishonest to Revenue Canada about their income. Cash only payments means they can under report their income and pay less tax. No audit trail exists when credit card payments are not accepted.

I would not say this is normal for all Chinese restaurants.

All restaurant owners of different ethnic backgrounds can lie to the government when it comes to filing their tax returns. This is not a Chinese restaurant phenomenon.

^um yes it is. All asian resteraunts in richmond are essentially cash only. unless we are talking about some of the Bigger ones.

HKYK just went out of business lol.

Well, it's also cause there is some processing fee (for the restaurant) that is charged for every credit card transaction. Or something like that.

I don't think it's only/if to cheat the income tax system.

I remember at some smaller computer stores (some chinese owned) had "discount prices" if you paid in cash or debit.
(Probably because they just make the customer pay for the store's credit card fee if the customer is going to use credit card.)

Yeah... mainly the chinese cafe restaurants, which are mainly everywhere in Richmond.
The bigger restaurants, like Top Gun or Richmond Sushi for example, should accept credit card.

So the restaurant is just scamming out of paying taxes, but I’m supposed to hope they aren’t scamming or lackluster on anything else, like say food and health regulations?

No thanks. If you can’t man up to pay taxes, like hell I’m going to support your bullshit restaurant.

Regardless, not my scene, but to all those who are into it, enjoy! I just didn’t get the cash only thing.