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Relationship & Gender DiscussionTHIS SPACE OPEN FOR ADVERTISEMENT. YOU SHOULD BE ADVERTISING HERE! The thin line between love and hate
Mature discussion about understanding the opposite sex...
Tough for me outside of online. All my "friends" are busy with school/work, and I literally have no one to hang out with without sounding like a creeper. I don't think I've seen more than ten or fifteen people in over a year that I don't know through RS meets. Even random interaction I already know will get my ass shot down. I think this is the most alone I've been in two years. Compound anxiety and having to put on a facade for confidence, and loneliness is my friend.
FUCK NO... The GF had a 3 year membership that just expired this month so if you want to know anything let me know..
Back 3 years ago she said it was great and she met lots of great people that she's still friends with today.. Now They will let anyone in and I'm talking about nothing but losers, I went to the big New Years party in 2014 and fuck it was pathetic and no fun at all. The same people go to the same events over and over and it's like they don't have a life outside E&A..
They charge you for a one time year or more fee and then you have to pay $20 monthly on top of that plus you still need to spend money on the event's. I don't understand how people can fall for that shit!!
Like other's have said its a total cash grab and by the looks of things it won't be around in Vancouver much longer.
Eharmony was shitty at first for me but I went the gf there over a year ago and can't be happier. It's only of those things you gotta try everything and find out what works best for you.
Lol I was just using it as an example. I follow them on facebook and have seen some of the events they do. Money aside, completely uninterested after viewing the photos.
__________________
"Can you match my resolve? If so then you will succeed. I believe that the human spirit is indomitable. If you endeavour to achieve, it will happen given enough resolve." -- Monty Oum
Find something you're interested in and pursue that. There are girls in every field. It's a big + when they see you are passionate about something and since they are in the same field, more stuff in common.
What do you like to do OP? Photography? Join a photography class to pick up some photography skills and hit up some girls. Video games? Go to those PAX or Comic Cons or whatever and show off your knowledge. Interested in learning a new language? Go to one of those language schools and learn some German or Japanese or something. Trying new things goes hand in hand with meeting new people. And while trying new things you will end up struggling with everyone else doing the same thing and your connection becomes stronger.
The thing with friends' friends is they are all taken or are in long term relationships. We are all around the age where everyone is getting married and popping out babies.
Joining interest clubs is a good idea! The somewhat difficult part is finding time after a work day to attend these things... and showing up to a bunch of unknown folk... I'm fairly outgoing but super large crowds
The photog class is a really good, cuz I've been meaning to learn how to use my non-dslr but manual mode camera! Where does one find such class?
Anyone tried attending anything on meetups.com?
For what it's worth, I'm not looking for a hook up...that is what tinder is for... many drinks and bat shit crazy becomes acceptable..
Just some cool girls to hang with and see if anything develops!
__________________
Sometimes we tend to be in despair when the person we love leaves us, but the truth is, it's not our loss, but theirs, for they left the only person who couldn't give up on them.
Make the effort and take the risk..
"Do what you feel in your heart to be right- for you'll be criticized anyway. You'll be damned if you do, and damned if you don't." - Eleanor Roosevelt
My AFC gave me an ABS CEL code of LOL while at WOT!
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: Van
Posts: 1,805
Thanked 1,731 Times in 649 Posts
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Quote:
Originally Posted by tiger_handheld
Spoiler!
The thing with friends' friends is they are all taken or are in long term relationships. We are all around the age where everyone is getting married and popping out babies.
Joining interest clubs is a good idea! The somewhat difficult part is finding time after a work day to attend these things... and showing up to a bunch of unknown folk... I'm fairly outgoing but super large crowds
The photog class is a really good, cuz I've been meaning to learn how to use my non-dslr but manual mode camera! Where does one find such class?
Anyone tried attending anything on meetups.com?
For what it's worth, I'm not looking for a hook up...that is what tinder is for... many drinks and bat shit crazy becomes acceptable..
Just some cool girls to hang with and see if anything develops!
It helps to have a boss to egg you on to do something. I, fortunately, have a boss who will shoot the shit with me and egg me on to do what it takes to get what I want. I swear, I would have had so much more time to spend with the girl I liked if I had listened to him sooner. Just do it. For me personally, it was like this: ask her out. If she turned me down, I'd still go back to eat the food I loved. Treat her no differently than before. I wouldn't need to be awkward any more and just I'd just know that this is a person who would just be doing her job. It took a week of my boss egging me on to just fucking get on with it. Now, I regret not asking her out sooner. Fuck me. I dun messed up A-A-Ron. But that was no fault of anyone's but my own.
Even if it didn't work out with her, a good friend of mine who happens to be a spinal practitioner who helped me with my herniated disc problem thought I should meet one of her friends. She would not have done so if I had not helped her a great deal and treated her well. I treated her well because she helped me and I was being absolutely genuine without ever expecting her to hook me up. She did, so I have no choice but to move on and guess what? I've met some new girl just yesterday and just meeting someone new helps to get over the last. Not expecting to become her significant other, but just a new friend to hang out with and show around Vancouver since she is somewhat new to town who studied in the states.
Just keep finding excuses to break out of the ordinary. At the end of the day we are all short on time. Don't have time? Shift it to make time.
Talk to every single female you meet whether you're interested or not. Just to get used to small talking.
I'm in the same boat as you. I've been to a few meetups, and what's been said in this thread is true, if they're worth dating, they wouldn't be at a meetup unless they're genuinely interested in the event. That said, if you want to practice chatting with girls, meetups is great!
Places where I found success in meeting datable ladies; mutual friends, doing stuff that I like doing, day trips (like tourist day trips), school, work (really depends on your type or work, eg nursing vs construction), flirting with the waitress, and various conventions.
Potential place, public transit, still working up the courage to do cold approaches. I forgot to mention, church. I'm not christian, so I wouldn't know, but I know of a lot of people that have met through church.
even if u got some event lined up, you got game bro?
That's what I gotta say. Get your game going or at least know what dating is nowdays. I have friends who can't hold a mofo conversation let along approach a girl. Keep on setting him up but he can't close. sad..
One time I witnessed a girl collect every guy's number at the meetup. She had great game but ended up hooking up with one of the weirdos of the group. This guy started to stalk her after she dumped him and she ended up having to get a restraining order on him after he tried to break into her place and GPS tracked her phone from his computer ... so beware of the crazies.
Personally I ended up dating a girl on meetup who was really awesome and given our backgrounds, we likely never would have met if not for meetup, so I'd say give it a try, you have nothing to lose.
Chatting with strangers is not an issue... but vancouver chicks who can actually make small talk (even if small talk is bs) is 1/100.
To the guys who say mall... this isn't friken highschool days where you go to metrotown and spend your afternoons walking in circles and pause in front of the aritzia store!
6793026... send em my way? LOL
Will report back after a meet up event..going to sign up and see what's there.
That photog class...any ideas on where that is?
__________________
Sometimes we tend to be in despair when the person we love leaves us, but the truth is, it's not our loss, but theirs, for they left the only person who couldn't give up on them.
Make the effort and take the risk..
"Do what you feel in your heart to be right- for you'll be criticized anyway. You'll be damned if you do, and damned if you don't." - Eleanor Roosevelt
Get your life on track, figure out exactly what you want to do on your own, get into a nice smooth rhythm with your life and BAM someone will show up and knock you off your treadmill. Failing that, volunteering for organizations that you are actually interested in, taking up social hobbies you actually want to be a part of, going to parties and any other social thing you're invited to even if you don't feel like going, stay off of Tinder. Dating sites work, but pick one with a good track record among people you actually know. You're better off getting out of your house, though. Met my current SO in the "real world" and when I saw his dating profile thought I probably wouldn't have messaged him because I found it intimidating and didn't think we had a lot in common. I was wrong. Don't limit yourself.
My AFC gave me an ABS CEL code of LOL while at WOT!
Join Date: Jun 2013
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Verdasco
it does sound stupid.... and immature. a mall? what are you? 15?
Why does it sound stupid? It exposes you to people. I go to the mall to do my shopping and I run into friends and sometimes they introduce me to someone who I've never met before whether it be a guy or girl. Sometimes, I go to a mall with a female friend who runs into her friends at the mall. Guess what? I've met some new people to hang out with.
How is it immature? The most immature thing I find is how much people care about being "mature". Who gives a fuck? Some people think playing video games is immature. I play video games, who cares, it's a pastime. Everything comes in moderation. I go to the mall because I wanna go to the mall to read my damn cycling magazines at chapters whilst sipping my large steeped tea with one milk and two sugars. Some of my good friends I know today is a result of me enjoying my time at the mall doing what I want to do because I met them from bumping into other friends. Had I not been at the mall I would have never met a lot of my friends.
The mall is a pretty social place to be at. It's no dumber than trying to hook up at work, which, arguably is even dumber to dip your pen in company ink.
If you go to a mall and wander aimlessly checking girls out and trying to hook up, then it would be creepy, but then you can creep anywhere. Malls get a bad rep because it's accessible to teens. So what? Let them keep to their teen section at Metropolis.
The attitude of saying something sounds stupid without looking at it in detail could be the worst thing one can say and possibly the last thing they will say. Think about it. Some of the hugest financial mistakes in the past were people saying they were stupid. Look at Blockbuster, they thought netflix was stupid.
Can't agree with you more. What girls want is someone who is established.
When your life in ON TRACK, then girls will come. Why? Because you've become interesting.
"well i'm already a gem, but girls don't notice me"
It's cause you're in Vancouver and you just THINK you're a gem.
Do you have any of these?
-got game
-interesting hobbies
-hold an interesting and inspiring conversation
-travel stories
-special talent
-amazing career.
As you can see, nice car and money ain't on that list and neither is your job. Career yes, but if you work at dead end job and have nothing but annoying stories about your boss, you won't attract anyone.
If you had these, you think you won't get chicks? Or you don't think your friends would refer you to a few?
-mad game, extroverted and well polished (hold urself in a nice event...NOT talking about just dressing up for dine out, but actually hold a conversation with VPs and CEOs)
-interesting hobbies like painting, kayaking, rock climbing, video game don't count.
-hold an interesting and inspiring conversation. There's business talk and nerd talk and then there's game talk, as in not boring the chick to death about magic the gathering... etc.
-travel stories. yes we all traveled, but if you've only been to Seattle and Victoria... well the girl who has traveled to 15 countries will find you super boring.
-special talent. eg// you're a stand up comic, you're a lifeguard on the side, you volunteer at soup kitchen.etc
-amazing career...job is boring, but if you work at something you love, you're passionate about, girls will want to learn from you.
Why does it sound stupid? It exposes you to people.
How is it immature? The most immature thing I find is how much people care about being "mature".
Look at Blockbuster, they thought netflix was stupid.
while I might 'agree' with mall being a social place to meet people, you went off tangent on netflix and blockbuster.
People on here are at different age group and your social hang outs is way different than someone's who's in their late 20s even mid 30s to "meet" people at a mall.
My AFC gave me an ABS CEL code of LOL while at WOT!
Join Date: Jun 2013
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Quote:
Originally Posted by 6793026
while I might 'agree' with mall being a social place to meet people, you went off tangent on netflix and blockbuster.
People on here are at different age group and your social hang outs is way different than someone's who's in their late 20s even mid 30s to "meet" people at a mall.
It's a missed opportunity. That's what I was trying to get at.
My wife's friend was having a hard time finding a guy even though she is good looking and has a job that pays well. She tried a bunch of dating sites, volunteering at concerts and doing coed sports. She is in a relationship now with a guy she met via tinder, so tinder isn't just hooking up. Also it seems like there are lots of single women in their early 30s in Vancouver (judging by wife's friends) looking for relationships before they get too old to make a baby.
My wife's friend was having a hard time finding a guy even though she is good looking and has a job that pays well. She tried a bunch of dating sites, volunteering at concerts and doing coed sports. She is in a relationship now with a guy she met via tinder, so tinder isn't just hooking up. Also it seems like there are lots of single women in their early 30s in Vancouver (judging by wife's friends) looking for relationships before they get too old to make a baby.
sometimes just good looking and $$ aren't enough for a relationship.
it depends on a whole lot of other things for long term
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by jasonturbo
Too bad it isn't about flipping cars to lose money, I'm really good at that.
Quote:
Originally Posted by SkunkWorks
This wouldn't happen if you didn't drive a peasant car like an Audi...
Quote:
[14-05, 14:59] FastAnna You tiny bra wearing, gigantic son of a bitch
[15-05, 10:35] FastAnna Yeah I was dreaming of those big titties in that tiny bra
I think you just need to break the mental block and just get out there. When you see a cute girl, say hi. If she can't do small talk then walk away LOL people make dating and first impressions too complicated! It's not like you'll ever see them again.
Don't focus on women though, focus on yourself and your own goals and ambitions. I've heard from so many women that they love a guy with passion and ambitions. What good is money and a Lambo when you're as shallow as a puddle? Depth, and a love for what you do is key. Work on yourself and everything else will eventually fall into place!
Lol. It's funny that people actually think to meet new people, all you have to do is get your life on track.
Just cause you're set with a career and financially stabled/organized, does not mean you'll meet people easier. Are you just gonna go around and tell people you have this much money and you work this job making this much a year? Booooooooooring. Conversations about jobs and finance will make me immediately turn the other way and say bye.
First of all, you have to know how to carry a conversation. When you can do that, you have to know who you are, your identity. Even if you're an awkward person, but know how to carry a conversation, people will respect you for that. If you're shy, that's fine. If you're aggressive and dominant, then so be it. There are many girls who like shy boys and what not. People will always want someone who can be themselves. With that said, If you're an awkward person, don't go trying to be interesting, you'll only result in failing. But even when you fail, if you live up to it and know how to recover, it'll all be good. If you're quiet and don't like to talk, then I have bad news for ya, you'll have a very fucking hard time meeting anybody.
Secondly, get the "first impression" shit out the fucking door. Unless you genuinely do have a good first impression, don't bother trying to put one up because you will fail miserably, it might not be now, but eventually. Go out and just be straight up about what you want and who you are. Tell people what you like about them, if you like their hair, say it. If you like their shoes, fucking tell them. This is one of the problems people have when meeting new people, is that they think they have to talk about vacation, restaurants, current events, or anything "interesting". Just do the basics and talk about shit you find interesting that is right there and then. For me, when meeting new people, nothing is more torturing than having that block of ice in between. Break that shit the moment you introduce yourself and the road will be paved for you.
Last and most importantly, you have to know how to fucking flirt. If you come off as a creep or a pervert, that's fine. Admit it, be proud of it and use it to your game (just don't fucking go beyond the line like stalking and terrifying the shit out of the girls). Believe it or not, even when girls say they don't like these types of behavior, they do, they want guys that shows attraction. Nice guys always fucking finish last. If you're not showing your attractions, you're losing out. There is never ever ever a time in the history of mankind, where a girl will choose a nice guy over a guy who will make the move (whether forcefully or decently). Especially when you're in your late 20's to mid 30's, no girls want guys that holds back for months and not make a move. So keep in mind the next time you meet a new chick that, she already have several other guys (probably lined up), and you have to present yourself to NOT be the nice guy. Don't go thinking, "wow, I met this awesome chick, I'm gonna respect her as much as I can". By "nice", I mean "to hold back your moves", "be afraid to touch", etc. If, however, a "nice guy" is who you genuinely are, then I have news for you, get in line and wait your fucking turn.
Meeting people is as simple as going out and just introducing yourself to somebody. It doesn't require some dating app or joining a club or activity. If you can hold a conversation with somebody (especially with strong eye contact and your ADD doesn't kick in), I bet you can meet anybody you approach. If one fails or just doesn't wanna talk, move on and go for another. Just remember that each time you part ways with them, get their fucking phone number or else what the fuck is the point? Unless they're some boring fuck that can't respond with more than one word.
All those youtube prank videos where they walk up to girls and just say anything on their mind, it's exactly like that, and simple as that.
TL;DR
Show attraction, show you're interested, and be your fucking self.
but like ANY place (real or virtual), the odds are the same.
the odds of you succeeding are the same everywhere, because the factor that stays the same, is YOU.
if you suck. then you'll suck everywhere. look in the mirror. listen to yourself. the way you act. the people you hang with. stereotype yourself. that's how the rest of the world sees you.
no one cares about how you see yourself. because that's not how the world works LOL.
mr_chin makes a good point too. there are people without their lives on track that can get girls left right and center (decent girls).
and there are people that have their life on track that cant get one decent date.
tinder... like... 3 years later, and over 600 matches later... i can tell you i've only carried conversations longer than 1 month with 5 girls, and only met 3 (locally).
sure those are low numbers. but i'm swiping right to everything. I set my age group from youngest to eldest. and my range to 65KM (if i run out i set it further out).
i just fucking swipe right to everything. and i save my super like for some banging hottie.
takes like 5min of my life everyday, i sit on the toilet and swipe right.
few hours later i check who i match. i unmatch the uglies. sometimes i reply some girls that seem cool. but overall, it's the same odds as if i approached 600 random girls on the street. except i'm doing it from my toilet. as im taking a shit.
how many girls have i met from tinder out of the 600 matches? 5 (internationally).
how many of the girls have i banged from tinder? 2. LOL.
but they were all good girls that i talked to for at least a few weeks. one of them i even talk to for months before we met. the ones i didn't bang was because immediately after i met them, i knew i wouldnt be compatible with them. its not that i didn't wanna bang them. but it's just that i can't stand hanging out with people i'm incompatible with. and im not desperate for sex. i hate putting up a fake face and dancing around like a monkey on dates. it's a complete waste of time.
now of course this isn't my only outlet. I have tantan (chinese version of tinder), and wechat (lookaround feature).
i've also have similar stats on both.
that PLUS i go out and look for girls. but to be honest... you get what you're looking for.
if you're looking for a serious gf, then you got to talk to them with the same attitude and intent.
ill be honest and say i do talk to a lot of them, but most conversations just trail off after a few weeks. some lucky ones last a few months. but you feel it out. it takes effort.
some girls are cool to talk to for a few days then they get comfortable and start to reveal their true selves. i always like to talk until it gets boring. that's when you find out who they really are. they drop the facade. the ones that are impatient or whatever just simply stop talking to you or remove you. that is fine. you have to be fine with that. just another bitch that isnt worth your time.
currently i have two korean girls and 1 cbc and 1 fob that i talk to. i've been talking to one of the koreans for 3 months now. she's asking me to hangout but i seriously just am too lazy and don't have the time to go meet her. in some way i think it drives them nuts, because i talk to them everyday, and when i do finally meet them, we practically know each other, and banging them is just a step away.
i think what's helped me the most is just not caring. tinder,wechat..etc. whatever... is just another outlet for e-friends/chatting. just another RS to me. users come and go. some are cooler than others.
FYI my current gf i met on tinder. i never thought it would happen, but it did. and she's more compatible than any other girl ive met in my life.
now u guys might think i'm a dick for still being on tinder and swiping right everyday and running my shit with these other girls and chatting with them. but... i never said i would fuck them. u always need a plan B. i just chat... nothing wrong with chatting.
hell i chat with a shit load of different people everyday for different reasons!
some of the girls i've met online have literally become just business connections overtime. some girls i've passed off to my friends or whatever.
tinder and all those other apps are just another place you can meet people. but a lot more convenient.
and for those still wondering why i swipe right to everyone... not only does it save you time (because swiping right quickly only takes so long, and you have limited swipes)... but be realistic. if you swipe no to every girl and only swipe yes to the super models... chances are you'll never match anyone. no super model is gonna swipe right to you. and you'd waste hours of your days sifting through girls.
that and if you swipe right to everyone, you get an idea of what type of girls like you too.
this might not be a good thing, but you learn about yourself. and how others perceive your profile. and you can edit that based on your results.
i'll be honest again, i dunno if it's just me, but i match a lot of fat white girls. i duno if they're just desperate and swipe right to every guy, or if they like asian guys or what it is. but now i know. fatties like me. LOL.
turn the game around. it feels good to wake up to 10 matches, and then you're the one deleting them off. the roles are reversed. you're in power now.
and once in a while... you get a very nice surprise. some super hotties out there will swipe right to you too.
oh i learnt another thing. the reason i go 18-55+ is because i've come across at least 4 different girls that are fairly hot to super hot, that have had fake ages that were ridiculous like 60 or 100 years old. i would have never seen them if i didnt raise the age limit.
don't waste your time playing candy crush. play tinder.
oh and tinder in any of the big cities in asia is nuts. back when i had unlimited swipes, i'd wake up with 30 matches a day no problem. and of the 30 or so, i could easily choose from 20 to meetup at any point of the day. but i still rejected most of them. if u don't click online, you prob wont click in real life. don't waste your time.
pussy is pussy. if you can't get pussy, you can't get a serious date.
and it's all about numbers. if you decide that online dating apps are shitty and a place for sluts and man whores... and you only go out to meet people. you better be some fucking power pimp and hit on like 30 girls every time you go out. there's no way in fucking hell you'll meet someone hot AND compatible if you don't connect with at least 5 people a day.
everyone has a very specific look they like, and a very specific personality they like. if you want both, you have to realise it's a very very low % chance you'll come across them unless you shot gun it and try to contact as many people as possible all the time.
PS. don't u hate it when you accidentally use your superlike on someone and then right after them is an even hotter girl LOL.
PPS. for those who can deal with fob mainland chicks... get tantan/momo/wechat
PPPS. don't forget you still need game. like mr chin says.
PPPPS. repeated close/intimate interactions/exposure to hot girls will take away that shy feeling. i don't care if you have to go and pay 3 hookers and have a 4 some or do a buncha drugs in vegas or some other place with a buncha girls for a week straight. until it becomes numb and "normal". you'll stop giving a shit about how girls look and you'll just fucking sift through that shit like it's nothing. and when you see one you want, you'll just fucking take initiative and grab what you want. yeah, sounds like an asshole, but then that's why assholes get all the girls they want.
PPPPPS. I realise that there are probably super awkward guys out there, with a very skewed perspective and they don't realise how awkward they are, and they don't even see it when they look at themselves in the mirror. I am sorry. you guys are kinda outta luck. unless you have some cool pimp friend that is willing to hold your hand and guide you and train you like a padawan learner or some shit... it's gonna be a very tough game for you. you guys should just stick with strip clubs and hookers. you'll probably learn more from them than anything else (im serious).
anyone that works in retail (customer service), for more than a few months shouldn't have this problem. you're forced to talk to everyone, of all ages, and backgrounds. for those who want to force themselves to learn how to talk to people... fucking get a retail job where you have to sell shit to people and provide good customer service. your level of smoothness will increase at an exponential rate up to a certain point.
raise your fucking standards. don't believe in that inner beauty bullshit. the higher your standards, the hotter the girls you'll get with. it's that simple. don't settle for less. you'll notice the level of "hot" girls you like have a baseline of what they accept. they sure as hell probably won't go after some idiot that has a half ass beard, wears sweat pants and has bed hair and looks like he just played 30 hours straight of world of warcraft or some shit. you'll start raising your standards. you'll want to at least look like you fit in with them. you'll start raising your own standards, so that you can meet the standard of girls you wanna get with.
all that "be myself" and "inner beauty" is bullshit. yeah, you can be yourself, IF YOURE COOL. you can have inner beauty... IF YOURE HOT ON THE OUTSIDE. LOL.
be yourself as in, be the projected ideal version of yourself you have in your head. look in the mirror. do you match that ideal? are you as buff as u wanna be? do you look like a fucking dork? is your hair all greasy? do you fucking stink? can you even talk without stuttering?
it's never about how you think you are. it's about how others think you are. you're not playing a game of trying to win yourself over. you're trying to win OTHERS over. THEIR perspective matters more than yours. you want as much passive ability as possible. if you look decent, smell decent, act decently, and present yourself decently... that's what they'll see.
last of all, money matters. it doesn't mean you gotta be making 100k a year or some shit. even if you're a poor student with a part time job where u make 10g a year, and you drive a 2000 corolla or some shit. that's FINE. but don't get caught wearing some shit like... old sweat pants with lint all over it. and those stupid fucking lame sweaters with that inverted triangle where the neckline is. and black sneakers with white socks or some bull shit. at least TRY to look CLEAN. wipe that fucking dandruff off your shoulders, it's fucking disguising. clean those glasses if you wear any. cut your god damn nails. look like you groom and take care of yourself. appear to care. appear like you strive to wanna make more, to be better.
oh and for those of you that are young (and by young i mean like below 23 years old)... don't worry. it gets hella easier as you get older. when you hit your late 20's till mid 30's. as long as you haven't let yourself go and gotten hella fat... your options widen a lot. older girls will like you, and young girls will love you.
think of it this way. there are fucking super hot 18-25 year old girls that hang with older men. these older men are more established, have more experience, and money, than you do. how the fuck are you gonna compete? YOU CANT. you're shit outta luck unless the girls are sheltered and don't hang with anyone (but they'll explore their options soon enough). so if you're young, and wondering why you haven't ever had a chance to date a super hottie, or bang one... it's probably cuz you're not even old enough to compete. you're still just a kid lol. it hurts but that's the truth.
i've dated girls i could only dream of (when i was a kid)... now it's like... nothing. and they act totally different towards you when you're older.
you have to think of it this way. you're not unique. there's a shit load of other men just like you. some where out there, is a guy EXACTLY like you. and you're both wondering why you can't get any dates. it's because there's other guys out there, who WERE exactly like you... but now they're older and better.
when i was dating this 22 year old, i was surprised at how "mature" she was for her age. i thought about it... and i looked at the guys her age. i realised, there is no fucking way, at all, that she would ever date anyone her age or close to her age. the guys her age were fucking kids.
i ain't afraid to admit this, when i was 22, i was an AFC. i had no idea why i couldnt get girls and the ones i got close with, they went no where. that all changed with age. the number of girls i dated and banged increased exponentially. and still does. the level of hotness goes up every year too. so for you young guys that are still wondering what the fuck you're doing wrong... you might not be doing anything wrong at all. you're just too young. go hit on some 17 year olds LOL.
another thing that's helped me was letting go of ideals. of what i thought of how things should work. someone earlier posted something about a buncha stuff and someone else posted saying "you just made a bunch of dead ends for yourself"
yeah, who cares if they have a BF. talk to them. who cares if they're married. flirt with them. who the fuck cares. unless they're a huge fucking monster that can crush you with their hand, youve got nothing to be afraid of. if you wanna be all righteous and "correct" then you'll never get anywhere. remember, you ain't banging them. you're just talking. there's no such thing as homewrecking. NO SUCH THING. it takes two to tango. and if they respond and tango with you, the home was already fucking wrecked to begin with.
uhh that's all i got to say.
sorry i typed this out all in one go. i must of repeated myself a million times and other grammatical errors and shit, whatever.
Last edited by Ulic Qel-Droma; 01-28-2016 at 05:48 PM.
-mad game, extroverted and well polished (hold urself in a nice event...NOT talking about just dressing up for dine out, but actually hold a conversation with VPs and CEOs)
-interesting hobbies like painting, kayaking, rock climbing, video game don't count.
-hold an interesting and inspiring conversation. There's business talk and nerd talk and then there's game talk, as in not boring the chick to death about magic the gathering... etc.
-travel stories. yes we all traveled, but if you've only been to Seattle and Victoria... well the girl who has traveled to 15 countries will find you super boring.
-special talent. eg// you're a stand up comic, you're a lifeguard on the side, you volunteer at soup kitchen.etc
-amazing career...job is boring, but if you work at something you love, you're passionate about, girls will want to learn from you.
Vancouver girls :
mad game - talk to them about food and dine out. talk about current events and they have no opinion or convo dies really fast.
interesting hobbies - which resturant do you like..i want to travel to___. lets be real, you should be able to afford a damn plane ticket and go...but they are too busy spending the $ on dine out.
travel stories - it's all about dreams and wishes .. nothing about experiences..
special talent - oh you volunteer on the side read: you have a busy schedule what about time for me?
amazing career - great but you are not a pilot or add some other thing you are not.
the whole issue comes down to the mentality of "I deserve the best! i'm not settling" - it's the damn prisoners dilemma.
those atleast have been my experience to date.
have to agree with Uliq - it's a numbers game... hence the title of the thread ... meeting / dating in 2016!
But I gotta say, meeting takes time and money....
__________________
Sometimes we tend to be in despair when the person we love leaves us, but the truth is, it's not our loss, but theirs, for they left the only person who couldn't give up on them.
Make the effort and take the risk..
"Do what you feel in your heart to be right- for you'll be criticized anyway. You'll be damned if you do, and damned if you don't." - Eleanor Roosevelt
Last edited by tiger_handheld; 01-28-2016 at 07:47 PM.
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