Speak it Out

[fliptuner]

I'm really trying to be more diplomatic but it's so hard when there are fucking idiots everywhere.

[6793026]

it's been a week.

I chose bros before hoes and got punished. You're break up with me cause I don't put you high enough and made you feel not important.

I guess this is it huh...

[mb_]

Could this be a start of something? We shall see.

[kross9]

Originally Posted by mb_

Could this be a start of something? We shall see.

I know what you mean meng.. could be something great!

[rzrshrp]

Originally Posted by ZN6

I cringed when I saw your post about your outing, I'm cringing even harder when I read this. You know what I'm reading? A wall of excuses.

I dunno what happened on your "date" but you make it out to sound like a pretty horrible experience from her end. If you didn't have a good conversation going AND you barely knew her, why would you even ask when you should contact her when it ended only a few hours ago? That reeks of desperation which any person, guy or girl would find repulsive.

It ain't the color of your skin, or your height or your looks as long as you look and are pretty average. If she doesn't think she will be romantically involved with you, it's because you have nothing interesting to talk to her about, hence your forced date-conversation. Not being attracted to you physically was the easy way out for her.

If you have any hint of her not being interested, you should not be spilling your heart out. How do you gauge her interest? Well, if the number of happy moments are outweighed the number of awkward, forced conversation type moments, you should know she ain't that into you and if you make that leap, she is definitely gonna boot you in the face. Don't get me wrong, even if the number of happy moments out weigh the awkward moments, there's still a good chance that she will boot you in the face but there would be less chance of that happening. Another good sign that she is not interested is that she keeps her distance when walking with you and there's no attempt for her to physically get close to you.

When I go out with a girl I intend to get together with, after a few times going out with her, if she has made physical contact with me a few times, I will do the same and make contact with her until I eventually reach for her hand and hold it. Even then, it takes time for them to get to know you aren't a serial killer by talking with you and having some engaging conversation. Everything is built up slowly. Nothing in a relationship is instantaneous. I ask the girls I go out with more questions than they ask me to try and get to know them and then I let them bounce back with something to say and let the conversation build over time and establishing who this person is and what they like. You gotta learn some patience and chill out. You know how fishing lures work? If you make movements too sudden and unnatural, you scare all the mother fucking fish away, and then you're gonna go home with a bucket of rocks to eat for the night. If you slowly work the lure in a slow and calculated way and temped fish into biting, eventually you will get a hit.

From the sounds of it, you jumped the gun way too fast and you came off as desperate and got rejected, simple as that. Let me internet-Sherlock this for a bit: So you went out with her on the 4th of June, then you go ahead and tell her how you feel on the 13th. By my poor finger counting, that's 9 days from when you posted last about your first date on June 4th. So in reality, you only dated her for maybe 8 days? Too soon, Junior.

So the paradox is this: Learn patience, quickly.

Well, on to the next. Hope that was a good learning experience. Since you've already spilled your guts for her, being her friend will inevitably end sooner or later when she finds a guy to date. Trust me, when she finds another guy, it's gonna hurt you when she doesn't even want to talk to you.

So like you said, on your date, you didn't even know her much, so what's the point of keeping in contact? Being her friend because she has a lot of single friends is not going to help you. So many guys think this is such an awesome thing, but in reality it is quite possibly the most beta thing to do. If you are banking on her setting you up with one of them, you're just gonna remain one of her play things. She got power over you.

Are you gonna be emotionally attached to a girl who doesn't want you and who you barely know? Just take the hit and move on. Like I said before, go out and do shit and experience the world beyond work, it will make you less boring to be around.

Haha ouch... I needed that.

Hm I see your point. And now that I am more level headed about what happened, and after analyzing it like 1000x I came to a conclusion.

The first date wasn't the best, yes. But we did start talking again after that and she said she "had fun" on the first date, which I don't agree with but whatever. I guess I didn't know her that well that's why it wasn't that great the first time. I didn't talk to her at all over text for the whole week until the next date. I thought maybe it was just the timing or something so we went on a second date, and it was awesome! The conversation was slightly forced on the first date because we spammed each other like crazy on fb in the weeks leading up to the date, as a result, we didn't have a lot left to talk about.

But anyway, my summer is pretty packed anyway. Have to work and study for my MCAT which is later in the summer. It's not like I chose to only work and study

I completely understand what you are saying brah, but believe me, I have done this several times as well. The only reason I was moving so fast was because I had other priorities (studying, friends, working, etc.) and I really did not want to invest a large amount of time/effort/money in a girl I wasn't even sure would like me back. So instead of just wondering how she felt all the time, I just told her. And you make it sound like I told her that I loved her hopelessly lol, all I said was "I enjoy spending time with you, do you want to carry this relationship further?" she said "like me as your girlfriend?" or something and I said "no, I mean we can take it slow and date casually for now".

Wow lol, I just got called boring... I usually do a lot of other things hobbies and such, but like I said this is not much of a summer for me. And I am SOL for finding another girl to date in the meantime (that's not from my immediate social circle) because I just work and study at the moment.

Reason I wanted to stay friends with her was because the second date was legit fun and we had a really nice conversation about something we viewed in a very similar way, she is fun to hang out with and we have a lot of mutual friends too soo...

Anyway, I really appreciate your support through all of this man. My progress is slow but it's steady.... I am learning a lot, and learning not to take rejection too personally. I hope it all pays off.

Edit: Btw, as a side note, I would much rather have gotten rejected up front than to be entertaining her for months on end only to find myself in the friendzone tbh. So I feel that it was good that I just told her how I felt. No games

[XplicitLuder]

hard to feel like part of the group..

[JShifter]

If you want things done right, you have to do it yourself

[hedonist]

even 10+ hour work days and a second job on weekends can't keep my mind from thinking about you at night.... GTFO out of my head. I beg you.

[tiger_handheld]

Originally Posted by hedonist

even 10+ hour work days and a second job on weekends can't keep my mind from thinking about you at night.... GTFO out of my head. I beg you.

binder dundat

the nights do become shorter... just gotta let it take its course.
no amount of 'distraction' will fill that void until the void has been emptied of what was contained in it before.
it's painful but like a gunshot wound, it hurts the most when the bullet is taken out of the wound so the wound can heal!




on another note: good friends + 24hrs of good food = good times!

[Euro7r]

Got work in 6hours and can't fall asleep!

[ts14]

things are finally starting to get better. more happy moments than sad ones

[melloman]

Paradiso in a week.. and my body isn't ready for it.. fuck.

[kross9]

feeling free!

YouTube

[fourthavenuecafe]

Originally Posted by wkbb

whoever hit and ran after hitting my mirrors at harbour centre's parking lot,
I hope you'll slowly die from genital hemorrhage, while being tied down to a chair as someone rip apart your nails from each of your finger and toes all while watching your mother being forcefully stuffed with dirty ecstacy pills and having only std infected semen of DTES junkies to down it with. After that your teeth will be knocked out with a hammer and have your eyeballs blow torched off

Why bring the mother into this? What did she do wrong? Giving birth to him?

[6o4__boi]

lol let the guy be. nothin wrong with venting.

i'd probably be thinking the exact same thoughts or even worse if that happened to me.
hell, i'd wish 86 inches of dick plunged through the asshole, out their mouth and into their grandmother's eyeballs of any dickbag who cuts me off...so you can imagine what kinda word shit storm i'd brew into this thread if something like what happened to
wkbb happened to me.

that's pretty tame (and creatively hilarious) compared to shit i think about doing to people who piss me off.
course i'd never air material at that level out lol

[kakucaekz]

To the girl in the gym today doing deadlifts in those tight ass leggings. Dang, you booty juicy. Wish I wasn't working LOL.

[Presto]

All of the stuff I need for a week of vacation fits in a carry-on bag. Meanwhile, my wife brings a big piece of luggage that's 4 times the size of my carry-on. Included with all her outfits are 6 pairs of shoes. 6! WTF!

[6o4__boi]

6? we've got it relatively good.

that's about the normal number for a week. I've heard of buddies going away with their girls for a weekend and they'd bring like a dozen pair of shoes.

[Tone Loc]

Originally Posted by Presto

All of the stuff I need for a week of vacation fits in a carry-on bag. Meanwhile, my wife brings a big piece of luggage that's 4 times the size of my carry-on. Included with all her outfits are 6 pairs of shoes. 6! WTF!

Meh, your girl is just trying to look good. Would you rather she packed light, but looked like a disoriented mess of a slob during the entire trip? Girls put a ton of effort into looking good... there are a few drawbacks to this as you may imagine

[Gerbs]

Originally Posted by Akinari

Getting race header installed and test pipe custom fabbed next week. Don't know why but I am extremely excited as to what the outcome will be like CAN'T WAIT

What does that sound like

[BeeBeeAhn]

got roped into going clubbing on Saturday. This cannot possibly end well. fml.

[6793026]

Just when we had a break for 1 week, we finally sat down in person to have a talk.

At the end you think we don't "match" in personality. Girl, relationship takes work. A LOT OF WORK. If you don't have faith and can't be positive, it'll never work.

This is why I didn't fight for you anymore this time. IF YOU CAN'T cherish how awesome we are, then why should I fight anymore.

Good bye and good night.

[JShifter]

You're a cutie

[pinn3r]

she was a low key ho.. but she ain't my responsibility no mo'

her current guy is in for a treat

[Galactic_Phantom]

fuck me. why am I such a socially awkward loser