| Harvey Specter | 06-27-2009 03:00 AM |
Quote:
If I don't tour they'll kill me
TORMENTED megastar Michael Jackson was terrified of performing the 50 London gigs that were looming, but told pals: "If I don't tour they'll kill me."
The singer's mental health crumbled in the days before he died, it was claimed.
His drug dependency was out of control as the singer once dubbed The Greatest Showman on Earth fell victim to a dark dread he had never experienced - stage fright.
Jacko's exhausted body finally collapsed after being weakened further by gruelling rehearsals for the string of comeback shows due to start at the O2 arena next month.
A source close to him said last night: "There were serious concerns for his mental health near the end - so much so that he was seeing a psychiatrist.
"He said he was being pushed into a corner and had an irrational fear that he would die or be killed if he didn't perform in London.
"He kept saying that he had to do the concerts because he owed too much money.
"But all the time he was saying these things, his body was starting to shut down as he became more and more dependent on drugs.
I want you back ... two girls with Jacko poster outside 02 venue
"His friends say he signed his death warrant when he put pen to paper for the O2 shows. He wasn't up to it physically or mentally."
Aides became increasingly concerned about Jacko's mood swings in the days before his death.
One moment he would be excited, energetic and full of enthusiasm for his British shows.
But the next he would sit staring into space and refuse to respond to anyone around him.
He also became anxious about the small surgical scar on his chest following his skin cancer surgery and was dismayed when he was prescribed extra pills for a minor infection.
He told staff he was convinced the cancer was killing him and that he was being punished by God - though he did not say why.
All attempts to calm him by suggesting postponing the shows on health grounds were said to have fallen on deaf ears.
He is alleged to have responded: "I owe money everywhere. They will kill me if I don't sing in London."
Throughout Jacko's troubled life, his turmoil was reflected in disturbing changes he had made to his face. In recent weeks it was his mind that was being distorted.
The Jackson family's lawyer yesterday blamed his inner circle - dubbed The Enablers - for pushing him too hard.
Brian Oxman, who comforted Jacko's relatives, including sister La Toya and brothers Jermaine and Randy, said: "This was something I feared and something which I warned about."
Former producer and friend of Jacko Tarak Ben Ammar also claimed the hypochondriac star had previously been a victim of "charlatan doctors".
He said: "It's clear to me the criminals in this affair are the doctors who treated him throughout his career - who destroyed his face and gave him medicine to ease his pain.
"He was a hypochondriac and one never really knew if he was sick because he had become surrounded by charlatans who were billing him thousands of dollars' worth of drugs, vitamins."
Another source added: "Michael was convinced that if he didn't perform in London he would die.
"He would say, 'They will kill me', but no one ever really understood who he was talking about. He seemed paranoid."
Promoters of the shows at the O2, in Greenwich, South-East London, said Jacko had passed a rigorous 4½-hour medical before signing the deal in March.
He hoped the This Is It gigs would revive his flagging career and boost his tarnished
Jacko desperately needed the estimated £50million he was set to make from the shows.
He had plunged into debt despite being worth £350million in his heyday.
At the time of his death he was almost bankrupt, living on friends' generosity and bank handouts.
Experts said it would be largely up to his family to sort out what promised to be a financial nightmare.
Mr Oxman said: "I suspect that the death of Michael Jackson is only the beginning of the legal battles over not only his property but also his children."
More than 750,000 tickets were sold for the London gigs but concerns grew after the first four were postponed last month.
Promoter AEG Live now faces the prospect of a £300million black hole in its finances.
Jacko's death has hit it with a £51million bill for ticket refunds.
Other factors, including production costs, planned future tour revenue, and advance payments made to Jacko sent the total soaring.
Shocked fans began turning the O2 into a shrine to him yesterday.
Among those mourning the star was Mohammed Rizwan, 26, who had spent £1,300 on tickets to see 17 of the London concerts.
The salesman, from Stratford, East London, said: "I'm gutted - not because I'll miss the shows but because I'm going to miss him."
First night ticket-holder Paul Carter, of Chafford Hundred, Essex, said: "He was our generation's Elvis Presley."
Floral tributes, banners, pictures and messages were piled up outside the former Millennium Dome.
Suzanne Butler, 27, a legal editor from Bromley, Kent, wept as she read some of the notes.
She said: "I could not go to work today. I was too upset."
Mimi White, 33, from London, said: "When I heard I freaked out. I could not stop crying and I was praying it was not true."
Jenny Williams, 41, a civil servant from Basildon, Essex, said: "I called Jacko my dancing partner because I grew up with his music."
Jacko's death also dominated talk among rock fans at the Glastonbury festival, Somerset. Student Harriet Molloy, 22, said: "His songs were playing everywhere."
And a flash mob of hundreds of Jacko fans danced to his music outside London's Liverpool Street station yesterday evening.
http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage...l-kill-me.html
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