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The thin line between love and hate
Mature discussion about understanding the opposite sex...

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Old 01-17-2011, 08:49 AM   #151
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hey man,

sorry to hear about the result. to be honest, there wasn't any point in this discussion where things seemed to be heading in the right direction for you.

i'm sure it hurts like hell but you'll get past this. as cold as it might seem, there really isn't one person you cannot do without. life goes on!

get back to socializing with friends and family, meet new people. hell, come out to some car meets and just chill for awhile until you feel solid about yourself again.

don't forget, you've got a lot going for yourself right now. you've built up your future with a solid source of income and that's one of the bigger battles in life. also, i'd continue to work less (ie normal 40hr week or so) and focus on enjoying your life outside of work. don't let work define you!

i'm not sure what else could be said at this point but i wish you the best of luck.

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Old 01-19-2011, 08:46 AM   #152
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Well if anyone is still following this hell whole.

She leaves for Boise Idaho on Saturday. Think this might make my life easier as it makes keeping in touch harder to do.

Is it stupid that I still want to be friends with this girl?
Honestly, she has been my best friend for the past 5 years and it would suck to loose that as well.

Gotta say life is tough for me right now but things are looking up some.
Got shafted with moving out to a new place with her so I got stuck at my parents while I found another place.
Looks like a friend of mine is looking for a roommate in North Vancouver so I may jump on that one.

Any more advice for getting over/dealing with this situation?

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Old 01-19-2011, 08:52 AM   #153
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With her being away it WILL be easier. And it is normal to want to still be friends, you've shared five years of your life together. My best friend in the world is one of my Ex's and it can work very well but it does take a lot of time to get there. I would suggest you give yourself a cooling off period of at least 6 months to a year before having any steady contact with her though.

It looks like there is some half full in the glass though and that you're looking at it that way which is good.
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Old 01-19-2011, 08:54 AM   #154
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Well if anyone is still following this hell whole.

She leaves for Boise Idaho on Saturday. Think this might make my life easier as it makes keeping in touch harder to do.

Is it stupid that I still want to be friends with this girl?
Honestly, she has been my best friend for the past 5 years and it would suck to loose that as well.

Gotta say life is tough for me right now but things are looking up some.
Got shafted with moving out to a new place with her so I got stuck at my parents while I found another place.
Looks like a friend of mine is looking for a roommate in North Vancouver so I may jump on that one.

Any more advice for getting over/dealing with this situation?

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Probably the worst idea you can do.. its just going to prolong your healing period. Like I mentioned way earlier....Ive gone thru the same shit.

Giving yourself NO CONTACT for a while is the best way to heal. Whether its for a few months or even a year... youre going to need to forget about her for a while so you can fully move on.

Please dont make yourself go thru hell by being her friend... thats the last thing you want to be. You need to realize that. Just ask yourself if you want to be the one who she asks questions to if she has another guy in her life?
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Old 01-19-2011, 09:18 AM   #155
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Probably the worst idea you can do.. its just going to prolong your healing period. Like I mentioned way earlier....Ive gone thru the same shit.

Giving yourself NO CONTACT for a while is the best way to heal. Whether its for a few months or even a year... youre going to need to forget about her for a while so you can fully move on.

Please dont make yourself go thru hell by being her friend... thats the last thing you want to be. You need to realize that. Just ask yourself if you want to be the one who she asks questions to if she has another guy in her life?
Thats very true. I could not deal with her asking be about another guy. Although she does know that and would never go there, or so she said.

Ya, shes leaving soon so I wont even have a chance to talk with her so its going to be easier for me that way for sure.
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Old 01-19-2011, 09:35 AM   #156
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I say get over her completely first before becoming friends again. Any sort of emotional attachment to her while being friends will be hard on you and could ruin any friendship you share.

Sure some people can stay friends aftter breaking up and never have problems, but you're not those people; you're you. Do what YOU need to do first.

As for getting over her you'll already have an edge since she'll be so far away. Get out there and meet new people, keep yourself busy and just try to better yourself. If you're not sure where to start, head over to the "unofficial meets" section of this forum and organize a small get together, there are always members up for a small coffee meet or late night cruising.


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Old 01-19-2011, 09:51 AM   #157
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I say get over her completely first before becoming friends again. Any sort of emotional attachment to her while being friends will be hard on you and could ruin any friendship you share.

Sure some people can stay friends aftter breaking up and never have problems, but you're not those people; you're you. Do what YOU need to do first.

As for getting over her you'll already have an edge since she'll be so far away. Get out there and meet new people, keep yourself busy and just try to better yourself. If you're not sure where to start, head over to the "unofficial meets" section of this forum and organize a small get together, there are always members up for a small coffee meet or late night cruising.


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Indeed.
Friends are what I need right now for sure.
My buddy is just finishing his pilots license then were going to fly to Vegas for the weekend. Oh snap.....party time!!!

Who wants to go? Got 3 empty seats!

I'm working on me for now. Gym 5-7 days a week right now. Dropping the relationship weight, need to get the Vin Deisel look back for the ladies!

PARTY
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Old 01-23-2011, 02:23 PM   #158
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Well here is an update to this whole black whole of a situation :P

So she was going to leave for Boise, Idaho on Saturday morning but there was a "delay" with her dad picking her up. So she is still here and now doesn't know when she will be going.

To make this a little more awkward the place I'm probably moving into is one driveway over from where she is staying with her mom right now. This is stressing me out like no other because I don't want to see her or talk with her. (not right now anyway)

Oh and some drama to add to this massive steaming pile...she is already seeing a guy. Who happened to txt me pretending to be her last night. FML.

Any cool single RS ladies wanna hang out some time?
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Old 01-23-2011, 03:40 PM   #159
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wow what a massive bitch. see, people don't just suddenly decide to break up like that. male or female, everyone thinks about it for awhile (when it's a significant relationship).

how come you're moving in to a place so close? there must be a better option..
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Old 01-23-2011, 03:43 PM   #160
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You know, you should go "fuck it, Im moving to my new place. I moved heaven and earth for you for 5 years. Starting now, I come first."

She being close by might actually be a blessing in disguise. You are working out and doing things to better yourself. When she sees the changes, she is going to be jealous that you are better with out her.

Dont let your fuck with your life.
Dont "FML"
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Old 01-23-2011, 05:29 PM   #161
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WHAT?! Already seeing a guy?! WOW...
This chick has BITCH written all over her
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Old 01-23-2011, 07:26 PM   #162
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Fuck what she has. Worry about yourself dude. Move to the place you had set sight, it's time to stop making yourself a doormat for her to walk on.
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Old 01-23-2011, 09:06 PM   #163
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Why would he txt you pretending to be her?? That's messed up.
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Old 01-23-2011, 10:49 PM   #164
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She was probably already seeing the guy while you guys were together. What a bitch!
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Old 01-24-2011, 12:38 AM   #165
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It's a buddies place that he needs a roomate for. Didn't realize where it was until I google mapped it.

They guy txt'ing me was because I made her cry when she asked if I wanted to come hang out with her and I said no I didn't want to see her. So he pretended to be her because she was to messed up crying.

As for this new guy, they aren't dating. Just hanging out and such, but its only a matter of time. Hes the "good enough for now" guy I think.
I don't know at what point she all of a sudden did this 180 but she has lost her mind. Her friends are all stuck up bitches now, shes constantly out drinking and clubbing, just finished school, has no more job because she was suppose to move. Shes fucked her self hard on this one.
No job, no money, no real friends, huge bills to pay, living in her moms living room.

It's amazing how many women find you as soon as you become single. Cant say I'm looking for anything but amazed that I have women like this looking at guys like me haha.
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Old 01-24-2011, 12:58 AM   #166
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What would you do if she decided she wanted to be with you again?
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Old 01-24-2011, 03:43 AM   #167
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If she's going to be a bitch you might as well post up naked pictures of her.
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Old 01-24-2011, 09:42 AM   #168
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What would you do if she decided she wanted to be with you again?
give your balls a tug and tell her to fuck off! i'd tell OP to stand up for himself if this happens.

OP: aren't you glad you didn't marry this bitch now? she seems to be showing her true colours. i also call bs on the not-dating the new guy thing. he's there for one reason and one reason only. honestly though, i hope the new guy bangs her and skips out once he's hit it.
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Old 01-24-2011, 09:51 AM   #169
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give your balls a tug and tell her to fuck off! i'd tell OP to stand up for himself if this happens.

OP: aren't you glad you didn't marry this bitch now? she seems to be showing her true colours. i also call bs on the not-dating the new guy thing. he's there for one reason and one reason only. honestly though, i hope the new guy bangs her and skips out once he's hit it.
I agree with this post. If she chooses to be a dumbass and throw away a good thing then she deserves what comes to her.

Clearly she's not marriage material if she can't make good life decisions for herself.

OP wins
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Old 01-24-2011, 10:48 AM   #170
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wow, what a c*nt, tell her C U Next Time! and go live your life! cuz if she's doing this now, its a good thing that you guys aren't married and you divorce and she takes you for half!
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Old 01-26-2011, 11:37 PM   #171
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give your balls a tug and tell her to fuck off! i'd tell OP to stand up for himself if this happens.

OP: aren't you glad you didn't marry this bitch now? she seems to be showing her true colours. i also call bs on the not-dating the new guy thing. he's there for one reason and one reason only. honestly though, i hope the new guy bangs her and skips out once he's hit it.
He was living in South America for the past 6 months so unless she was seeing him for a long ass time then its a no go there.
Hes a friend of her cunt of a best friend.

Either way I told her to fak off.
Chasing some new booty right now. But shes a bit of a tough one I must say. Has a recent BF but I know she is interested in me :P
Feel like crap for wanting her to dump him but this chick is mint. Shes into everything I am and it a looker to boot.

I guess things pan out in the end. All I know is that I loved this girl, still do, dont thing that will ever go away. But I cant be with her, dont have the trust anymore with her, never would again.

Who wants to go wingmanin'? haha
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Old 01-27-2011, 10:47 PM   #172
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^although it's healthy to want to move on....aren't you kinda pulling a bitch move by chasing some girl who is currently taken when you just got your heart stomped all over by someone who wasn't focused on you 100%?

Just a thought.
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Old 01-27-2011, 10:52 PM   #173
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^although it's healthy to want to move on....aren't you kinda pulling a bitch move by chasing some girl who is currently taken when you just got your heart stomped all over by someone who wasn't focused on you 100%?

Just a thought.
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Well I guess it could be seen like that.
But the truth of the matter is shes the one coming after me.
To be honest, I don't know if I'm ready for anything at the moment. Still got my head all over the place.
If anything comes of it I don't know. I'm not in control of her life and wont tell her what to do.

Regardless, I would love to have her as a friend more than anything. Super cool chick!
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Old 01-27-2011, 11:05 PM   #174
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Well I guess it could be seen like that.
But the truth of the matter is shes the one coming after me.
To be honest, I don't know if I'm ready for anything at the moment. Still got my head all over the place.
If anything comes of it I don't know. I'm not in control of her life and wont tell her what to do.

Regardless, I would love to have her as a friend more than anything. Super cool chick!
Well in that case to be fair to her, dont you think that you should let her know your situation so you're not leading her on?
(If she is into you)

I'm sure you'd want that same courtesy if your positions were reversed..
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Old 01-28-2011, 11:12 AM   #175
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Plus you wouldn't want some girl that's taken... think about it. What sort of character would the person have if they were willing to leave someone for someone else? New girl's will probably say to her bf.. "I just don't love you anymore". Sounds like your bitch of an ex.
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