4 of my friends were supposed to have weddings in 2020, but 3 of them postponed them from late spring to late summer to early fall then ended up just doing a very small wedding in the end, while 1 of my buddies just cancelled it completely.

I thought only women cared about that...
Or maybe Asian parents who want to show off and invite all their friends who you have never seen in your life.

Oh man you ever go to one of those weddings where they play the life stories of the bride and groom? I physically cringe WutFace

You're talking about the reception and not the wedding.

I love that you said this. Literally the most uncomfortable thing to sit through, especially when you're just a guest at the wedding and you barely know the bridge/groom (like a coworker or friend of a spouse's wedding). You're sitting there watching gushy stories about them, meanwhile you barely know who the fuck they are :lol

One of the things that always made me wonder why anyone would want to have a massive wedding and invite people they aren't even close to.

^ same could be said of you ... wonder why anyone would want to attend a massive wedding if you hardly know the couple ... just as the obligatory +1? You're playing the same game.

Trust me, I don't want to go to these at all. When your girlfriend asks you to attend a wedding that her coworker or friend invited her to, you somewhat have to go. I've skipped many a wedding that I was invited to, but didn't feel the need to attend.

If I had the option, I'd happily skip all of them. Unless you're close family or a close friend, I'm not a wedding guy whatsoever.

I'll never have a formal wedding myself, elope and have a party, that's it.

I've made that clear in any relationship I've been in.

We're living in a world where its a popularity contest. From how many facebook friends u have, to how many IG followes u got, and b4 covid ive heard couples having bets on who would have the bigger guestlists..... i dont understand it but then again i dont understand alot of the thought process of alot of my friends nowadays......

Your somewhat right but in the end, going to a wedding is like a gauranteed good time and to top it off, someone else is footing the bill for it.....

No !... C'mon man ... you're not one of those that go empty handed ??!! I've found most etiquette gifting = quite a costly night. What's the going rate for appropriate gifting? $75-100 per person?

And never guaranteed good time, depends on who you get placed with at the table ...

I must be getting old, I actually dread going to wedding receptions.

Nope to your first question. $75-$100 seems about right per person imo, but apparently thats to low based on who u ask. Im getting old where wedding receptions are one of my only reasons to go out and let loose.

^That could be considered low.

I went to a good buddy's wedding last summer and gave a card with $300, I felt I wasn't giving enough, his wife was pregnant as well.

You never know where you stand, hence fuck weddings :lol

$75 - $100 barely helps the bride and groom break even for the reception these days.

Yikes ... inflation !! All the more reason to come up with an excuse not to attend!

A few times where I would've been the plus one I gave the gift of just not going. I know some people try to show off by having as many people come as possible, but otherwise I just assume the bride and groom allowing a plus one are just being polite. If I don't really know them then forget this whole song and dance of trying to guess how much it cost them for me to be there and buy an equivalent gift.

^ Couldn't agree more, wedding couples often wrack their brain on whittling down the list as is. +1's are a PIA and a lose lose. Crappy if you don't let your friends have one ... crappy if they end up bringing +1.

i think i gave $50 once for one of those weddings that i just felt like i went out of obligation and didn't really know the couple. i almost feel like $75 is worse than $50, you actually went out of your way to get a 5 dollar bill lol.

these days i guess there's inflation but if i didn't know the person well enough to give $100 i wouldn't go at all.

I think it depends on how well you know the couple. If I'm at a table that is like right next to the family tables, then I bring more $. If I maybe talk to the groom a few times on facebook or whatever, I appreciate the invite and I'll go, but I'm not going to lavish them with cash LUL

It's been a while since I went to a wedding, especially to an obligated one.

My rule of thumb is $100/person. And $150 together with my wife (looks better than $75 each) if we don't know the couple that well. I'm sure with inflation now, that doesn't cover the cost anymore though.

But TBH, there isn't a lot of people who I feel close enough anymore to give more than $100. My circle of friends have really diminished, but I'm ok with that. Quality > Quantity.

Weddings can be fun, but it really depends how well you know the others that are going. If someone in your circle of friends are getting married, then you'll probably have a good time. If you only know the couple, well, they're not gonna have any time for you that night. So be prepared to mingle with randoms and hope you don't get stuck at a table with boring people.

Almost everyone I knew getting married in the past 5 years pre-COVID was doing so overseas as a destination wedding or they/partner live somewhere else.

LOL fuck that, on top of having to fork over 5K (as a couple) for the flight/accommodations and take a week or more of my precious vacation time you still expect me to subsidize your party/honeymoon with more money. Yeah sorry.

A few years back I seriously considered going to my good friend's week long wedding in Bali but after considering I hardly knew anyone else who was going I couldn't be bothered and took the money I was going to spend and went on a 2 week vacation by myself :lol

Destination wedding are tacky as hell if you’re inviting large groups and expecting them to come

It’s also pretty pathetic that there is a thinking the bride and groom should “break even” or come out ahead after the wedding due to cash/gifts lol. Fuck

We had a destination wedding. Everyone was invited. No one was forced to go. I think there was 16 of us who ended up going so a nice size for a beach wedding.

Threw a big party/reception for everyone who couldn’t/didn’t want to come when we got back home. The wife got to wear her dress more than once so she was happy about that as well.

I don’t do weddings if they’re more than a 4-hour drive away and that’s if it’s a really good friend or a close relative, otherwise it’s a 2-hour drive tops.

It pisses me off when people get offended because you RSVP no to their destination wedding in Australia, Hawaii, or Thailand.

Like 15 years ago I RSVPed yes to one of my good friend’s destination wedding like over a year in advance and then ended up getting really sick and going on medical EI then welfare for about 2 years. Obviously I could no longer afford to go and he was not having any of it. We’ve barely spoken since where we used to hang out at least once a week and I vowed to basically never go to weddings at all. I ended up softening my stance several years ago but, like I said above, I’m not doing it if it’s not within driving distance.

This is a real thing.

One of my best friends invited me to be his best man at his wedding in Chile (at that point I had met his wife only once).

I ended up not going, neither did any of his other close buddy's out here.

We still hangout from time to time (he's moved to Toronto), but our friendship has never been the same since then, he really held that against me.

Come on man, Chile? We had just dropped big $$$ on a vacation literally a month before he sent the RSVP, and although I plan to visit Chile one day, it's not even in my Top 10 bucket list destinations.

Ah well.

I actually had a destination wedding myself. i actually invited about 80 people and about 60 people showed up. Mainly friends. It didnt cause a rift between me and the people that didnt show up. Some were scared of Zika and some just couldnt afford it, me and my wife understood. And we gave everyone 2 years notice that we were intending to do a destination wedding and kept it as cheap as possible from 3k a couple. Alot of my friends were travelling the world doing the site seeing thing so i think they were glad to go on vacation just to sit back and relax at an all-inclusive this time around.

My best friend had a destination wedding where I was the best man. I have known the guy since kindergarten so I felt like I had to go with it. It was probably over 5k after me and my wife had paid for everything and while it was a good time I wouldn't do it again for any other friend. For the money I'd rather go on my own vacation where we're free to do whatever we want on any given day.

Conversely, when me and my wife first started dating her very close friend was having a cruise wedding and because of the timing and financial constraints she opted not to go. Her friend said she understood at the time, but that pretty much ended their friendship, I don't think they even talk anymore.