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Vancouver Off-Topic / Current Events The off-topic forum for Vancouver, funnies, non-auto centered discussions, WORK SAFE. While the rules are more relaxed here, there are still rules. Please refer to sticky thread in this forum.

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Old 05-13-2010, 07:14 AM   #276
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I was having trouble with my computer. So I called Eric, the 11 year old next door, whose bedroom looks like Mission Control and asked him to come over. Eric clicked a couple of buttons and solved the problem. As he was walking away, I called after him, 'So, what was wrong? He replied, 'It was an ID ten T error.'

I didn't want to appear stupid, but nonetheless inquired, 'An, ID ten T error? What's that? In case I need to fix it again..' Eric grinned.... 'Haven't you ever heard of an ID ten T error before?

'No,' I replied. 'Write it down,' he said, 'and I think you'll figure it out.'So I wrote down: I D 1 0 T



I used to like Eric, the little bastard.
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Old 05-13-2010, 07:24 AM   #277
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a man goes out looking for a hooker for the night, he finds one that he likes and he ask her how much it will cost him, the hooker says 200 bucks, the man agrees and they go off to a hotel, they get to the hotel and she start to undress, while shes undressing the man starts jerking off and she like wtf are you doing, he says....



Spoiler!

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Old 05-13-2010, 08:55 AM   #278
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dracula walks into a bar and orders a cup of hot water, he pulls out a tampon and starts dipping it in the cup, the bartender asks what he's doing dracula replies...


im making tea
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Old 05-13-2010, 09:46 AM   #279
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Quote:
Originally Posted by gdoh View Post
dracula walks into a bar and orders a cup of hot water, he pulls out a tampon and starts dipping it in the cup, the bartender asks what he's doing dracula replies...


im making tea
I don't get it.
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Old 05-13-2010, 09:48 AM   #280
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^a used tampon you know...lol
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Old 05-13-2010, 09:51 AM   #281
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How is that funny?
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Old 05-13-2010, 09:54 AM   #282
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maybe if you read it again

dracula walks into a bar and orders a cup of hot water, he pulls out a tampon and starts dipping it in the cup, the bartender asks what he's doing dracula replies...im making tea

if you dont get then idk what to say to you
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Old 05-13-2010, 10:11 AM   #283
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the blood on tampon
this joke is not that funny, but nwen is pretty dumb and got me laughing
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Old 05-13-2010, 10:14 AM   #284
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Oh I get it...har har.


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the blood on tampon
this joke is not that funny, but nwen is pretty dumb and got me laughing
Hey shut up, I'm slow okay?
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Old 05-13-2010, 10:18 AM   #285
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A wife says 2 her husband, ''Bulls can fuck 3000 times a year, Why can't you?'' The husband replies, ''Ask the bull if he fucks the same cow every night !''
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Old 05-13-2010, 10:48 AM   #286
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^a used tampon you know...lol
In your original joke, it isn't clear that the tampon is used.
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Old 05-13-2010, 11:02 AM   #287
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Quote:
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A wife says 2 her husband, ''Bulls can fuck 3000 times a year, Why can't you?'' The husband replies, ''Ask the bull if he fucks the same cow every night !''
Posted via RS Mobile
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Old 05-14-2010, 09:41 AM   #288
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*RACIST JOKE*


What do you name a chinese baby thats born all black?






Sum-Ting Wong
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Old 05-14-2010, 09:48 AM   #289
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3 guys a driving late at night in the middle of nowhere when their car breaks down, they need a place to stay for the night, they spot a farm near by and ask the farmer if they can stay the night. the farmer says ok, but all he has is a bean bag chair...the 3 guys dont mind. they wake up in the morning and the guy on the left says i had a dream i getting a handjob from a girl. the guy on the right has the same dream...the guy in the middle says thats weird i was dreaming that i was skiing using ski poles..... lol
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Old 05-18-2010, 07:54 AM   #290
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"there but for the grace of god go I"
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Youth is, indeed, wasted on the young.
YODO = You Only Die Once.

Dirty look from MG1 can melt steel beams.

"There must be dissonance before resolution - MG1" a musical reference.
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Old 05-18-2010, 07:56 AM   #291
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Quote:
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A wife says 2 her husband, ''Bulls can fuck 3000 times a year, Why can't you?'' The husband replies, ''Ask the bull if he fucks the same cow every night !''
Posted via RS Mobile
lmao
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Old 05-18-2010, 10:19 AM   #292
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Ok, so you wanna hear a joke??









Spoiler!

Last edited by LiquidTurbo; 05-25-2010 at 01:32 AM.
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Old 05-18-2010, 10:22 AM   #293
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Ok, so you wanna hear a joke??









Women's rights.
Might be an old joke but... Why does Beyonce sings "to the left, to the left"










coz niggas aint got no rights !!!
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Old 05-20-2010, 07:27 AM   #294
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"A husband and his wife are watching a TV show about psychology that explains the phenomenon of "mixed emotions." The husband turns to his wife and says," Honey, thats bullshit, i bet you can't tell me anything that will make me happy and sad at the same time" She says, "Out of all your friends, you have the biggest dick."

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Old 05-20-2010, 09:42 PM   #295
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Omg thats fucking hilarious^
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Old 05-20-2010, 10:10 PM   #296
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"A husband and his wife are watching a TV show about psychology that explains the phenomenon of "mixed emotions." The husband turns to his wife and says," Honey, thats bullshit, i bet you can't tell me anything that will make me happy and sad at the same time" She says, "Out of all your friends, you have the biggest dick."

lol did you get that from Maxim?

i vaguely remember reading that from this month
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Old 05-22-2010, 06:10 AM   #297
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A boy and his date were parked on a back road some distance from town, doing what boys and girls do on back roads some distance from town, when the girl stopped the boy.

I really should have mentioned this earlier, but I'm actually a hooker and I charge $20 for sex."

The boy reluctantly paid her, and they did their thing.

After the cigarette, the boy just sat in the driver's seat looking out the window.

Why aren't we going anywhere?" asked the girl.

Well, I should have mentioned this before, but I'm actually a taxi driver, and the fare back to town is $25."
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Old 05-22-2010, 10:30 AM   #298
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did the chicken feel happy,when a cat fell in a pool...?

Because a wet pussy makes a cock happy
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Old 05-22-2010, 01:04 PM   #299
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Why did the chicken feel happy when the cat fell in a pool...?

Because a wet pussy makes a cock happy
Fixed.
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Old 05-22-2010, 02:42 PM   #300
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Stole this from the movie Hollow Man. Thought it was pretty funny.

So one day Superman was flying around and feeling really horny, so he was on top of building and he see's Wonder Women lying on the rooftop butt naked and her legs spread wide open!

So Superman was like "fuck man i gotta get me some of that wonder pussy" So he thought that he could just fly down and fuck her so fast that she wouldnt even know cause Superman is faster than a speeding bullet right?

So Superman then flies down and fucks the shit outta Wonder Woman in a second. Wonder woman goes "wtf was that?" then Invisable man goes "I don't know, but my asshole is killing me!"

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