REVscene - Vancouver Automotive Forum


Welcome to the REVscene Automotive Forum forums.

Registration is Free!You are currently viewing our boards as a guest which gives you limited access to view most discussions and access our other features. By joining our free community you will have access to post topics, communicate privately with other members (PM), respond to polls, upload content and access many other special features. Registration is fast, simple and absolutely free so please, join our community today! The banners on the left side and below do not show for registered users!

If you have any problems with the registration process or your account login, please contact contact us.

Go Back   REVscene Automotive Forum > Vancouver LifeStyles (VLS) > Relationship & Gender Discussion

Relationship & Gender Discussion THIS SPACE OPEN FOR ADVERTISEMENT. YOU SHOULD BE ADVERTISING HERE!
The thin line between love and hate
Mature discussion about understanding the opposite sex...

Reply
 
Thread Tools
Old 04-11-2021, 09:45 PM   #24926
Rs has made me the man i am today!
 
BIC_BAWS's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2013
Location: revscene
Posts: 3,293
Thanked 3,631 Times in 1,183 Posts
Quote:
Originally Posted by mikemhg View Post
That reminds me of marrying someone before you even live together.
Where's happyslip



Sent from my SM-G781W using Tapatalk

__________________
|| 97 E36 M3 Sedan || Arctic Silver | 5MT
|| RIP 02 E46 330ci | Schwartz Black II | 5MT | M-Tech II | Black Cube | Shadowline | Stoff Laser/Anthrazit | rip ||
|| RIP 02 E46 M3 | Carbon Black | 6MT ||

Quote:
Originally Posted by BICBAWS
aren't we glad I'm beating on a shitbox e36 and not an e46 M3?
Quote:
Originally Posted by JACK FROST
beating on a car is like anal sex ... there is a right and a wrong way to do it
BIC_BAWS is offline   Reply With Quote
This post thanked by:
Old 04-11-2021, 09:49 PM   #24927
My AFC gave me an ABS CEL code of LOL while at WOT!
 
Teriyaki's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: Vancouver
Posts: 1,832
Thanked 1,033 Times in 400 Posts
Uh yea, moving in right away is a super-no when you've never actually MET.

Maybe spend a week together shacked up to feel it out. That's insane they'd even consider doing that.
Teriyaki is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-20-2021, 02:31 PM   #24928
I *heart* Revscene.net very Muchie
 
Euro7r's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Vancouver
Posts: 3,725
Thanked 1,045 Times in 446 Posts
Got a good buddy that asked me on engagement ring if I knew of a place to get (I don't know jack since I'm not married, he asked me since he knew I have a lot of friends married and figured I may know a thing or two lol). Any shops that offer custom rings that's reasonable in cost that you guys can shed opinion on? I don't know, like $2-5K budget? I told him to google search it but seems like they don't really tell you cost.
Euro7r is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-20-2021, 03:38 PM   #24929
Orgasm Donor & Alatar owned my ass twice!
 
6793026's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: BC, HK, USA
Posts: 6,876
Thanked 2,106 Times in 828 Posts
just go to spence and take the gf to choose so you get an idea on what shape & resize later.

Due to covid, gf and i are planning to get thsi done during covid; i'm leaning towards moving to a new city + buying a house + wedding.

I want to get a CZ ring as a 'travel ring' and then she can pick whatever she wants on her own as a real one. last thing is her to look at a ring i chose that she doesn't like the shape.
6793026 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-20-2021, 03:43 PM   #24930
RS has made me the bitter person i am today!
 
Traum's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Paradise, BC
Posts: 4,804
Thanked 4,637 Times in 1,760 Posts
I have no clue on what prices are like now, but in theory, diamonds should have gotten cheaper since some international body has ruled that the diamond industry is no longer allowed to distinguish between synthetic diamond and "authentic" natural diamonds.

Being a brokea$$ / cheapa$$ at the time when I proposed to my wife, I did not get her a diamond ring, although I did get her a ring. Instead, after she accepted, I asked how important it was for her to have me get her a proper engagement ring (with a diamond on it). If she wanted one, we will buy one. Or, we could use the money on both the wedding and on home reno to get our apartment ready for us to move into. She took the 2nd option and she still loved the cheapa$$ ring that I bought her for the proposal.
Traum is online now   Reply With Quote
This post thanked by:
Old 04-20-2021, 03:47 PM   #24931
RS has made me the bitter person i am today!
 
Traum's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Paradise, BC
Posts: 4,804
Thanked 4,637 Times in 1,760 Posts
Quote:
Originally Posted by 6793026 View Post
I want to get a CZ ring as a 'travel ring' and then she can pick whatever she wants on her own as a real one. last thing is her to look at a ring i chose that she doesn't like the shape.
I would say that moissanite and white sapphire are fancier alternatives than CZ that present quite a bit better. But they are also more expensive than CZ.

Whatever floats your (and her) boat, you know?
Traum is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 04-20-2021, 06:06 PM   #24932
RS Veteran
 
bcrdukes's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2001
Location: TOS'd
Posts: 26,560
Thanked 8,320 Times in 3,302 Posts
Take a look at this thread.

https://www.revscene.net/forums/6987...ng-advice.html

A lot of good advice here as I recently had gone through this process. TL;DR: I was close to pulling the triggers on Brilliant Earth but found something way less than Brilliant Earth and to exact specifications while saving over $2000 from buying online. Nevermind in store.
__________________
iluvbmw4eva
bcrdukes is online now   Reply With Quote
This post thanked by:
Old 04-21-2021, 06:15 AM   #24933
ESKETIT
 
Vansterdam's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2004
Location: EASTVAN
Posts: 23,072
Thanked 9,403 Times in 2,200 Posts
for diamond rings, im guessing the peoples diamond spot at the vancouver outlet, by the airport. would be cheapest lol

even cheaper if you buy a used/buyback one from there

if anyone has a better suggestion lmk
Vansterdam is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-21-2021, 08:01 AM   #24934
うに
 
PK-EK's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: 403
Posts: 1,307
Thanked 993 Times in 398 Posts
anyone ever feel the stress and balance of life is too overwhelming?

the balance of work, family and relationship has gotten the best of me.
i really need a me day.
everyday i go in the garage and see my car in a torn up state; i get so stressed that i don't have any time for myself to work on the car.

On Friday, i told a lie to the GF and family that i had to work late. but in fact i had a small roadtrip to pick up a racecar with a friend out of town.
it was the best night i've had in a long time, felt like a kid again just doing whatever the fuck i wanted. even though we didn't get home til 3am. it was actually like a holiday for me.
is this a bad thing?
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by TOS'd View Post
The reason for Speak it Out is to actually set PK-EK up with someone, whether that be someone from this thread or outside of RS.
RSXspecialist@outlook.com
PK-EK is offline   Reply With Quote
This post thanked by:
Old 04-21-2021, 08:38 AM   #24935
My AFC gave me an ABS CEL code of LOL while at WOT!
 
Fafine's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: vancouver
Posts: 3,459
Thanked 1,401 Times in 465 Posts
Is it possible to let your gf know that you're feeling burnt out and you want to chill with the boys? That way you don't have to sneak around?
Fafine is offline   Reply With Quote
This post thanked by:
Old 04-21-2021, 09:01 AM   #24936
I *heart* Revscene.net very Muchie
 
Euro7r's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Vancouver
Posts: 3,725
Thanked 1,045 Times in 446 Posts
Quote:
Originally Posted by Fafine View Post
Is it possible to let your gf know that you're feeling burnt out and you want to chill with the boys? That way you don't have to sneak around?
If it's Covid where your gf/family doesn't want you to go out, that's understandable you lied to get a breather. But other than that, I can't really seem how it would be healthy on the long run for you to lie, leads to communication issues down the road. Can just tell them, your tired and need to take a night off to rest?
Euro7r is offline   Reply With Quote
This post thanked by:
Old 04-21-2021, 11:50 AM   #24937
I have named my kids VIC and VLS
 
Hondaracer's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2001
Location: Off-Topic
Posts: 31,629
Thanked 10,953 Times in 4,004 Posts
In regards to the ring much like dukes posted, blue Nile all the way.

Spence snd all the local places are shit and you’re paying GIA prices for non Gia-rated diamonds.

I’d rather buy a ring from Costco than Spence
__________________
Dank memes cant melt steel beams
Hondaracer is offline   Reply With Quote
This post thanked by:
Old 04-21-2021, 12:04 PM   #24938
Pull Out Towing. Women rescued for free.
 
SumAznGuy's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: Hongcouver
Posts: 8,064
Thanked 2,255 Times in 1,184 Posts
Quote:
Originally Posted by Hondaracer View Post
In regards to the ring much like dukes posted, blue Nile all the way.

Spence snd all the local places are shit and you’re paying GIA prices for non Gia-rated diamonds.

I’d rather buy a ring from Costco than Spence
Bought my wife's ring from Blue Nile many many years ago.
Had them secretly ship the ring to our hotel in NYC so there was no taxes since the head office was in Washington at the time.

Needless to say, GF/Wife was surprised by the ring.

She wore the ring onto the plane home. Tossed away the not important stuff. Mailed myself the important documents.
__________________
Originally posted by Iceman_19 you should have tried to touch his penis. that really throws them off.
Originally posted by The7even SumAznGuy > Billboa
Originally posted by 1990TSI SumAznGuy> Internet > tinytrix
(11-0-0) Buy/Sell rating
Christine
Shitvic
Pull Out Towing
SumAznGuy is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-21-2021, 01:48 PM   #24939
I have named my kids VIC and VLS
 
Hondaracer's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2001
Location: Off-Topic
Posts: 31,629
Thanked 10,953 Times in 4,004 Posts
It’s 4+ Years ago since I purchased my wife’s engagement ring but blue Nile had one of the best systems/website I’d ever used and amazing customer experience all around. I felt better served with them necer actually talking to anyone than the numerous stores I physically want into locally

Got a wayyyy nicer diamond for the price as well
__________________
Dank memes cant melt steel beams
Hondaracer is offline   Reply With Quote
This post thanked by:
Old 04-29-2021, 08:33 AM   #24940
うに
 
PK-EK's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: 403
Posts: 1,307
Thanked 993 Times in 398 Posts
Quote:
Originally Posted by Fafine View Post
Is it possible to let your gf know that you're feeling burnt out and you want to chill with the boys? That way you don't have to sneak around?
Quote:
Originally Posted by Euro7r View Post
If it's Covid where your gf/family doesn't want you to go out, that's understandable you lied to get a breather. But other than that, I can't really seem how it would be healthy on the long run for you to lie, leads to communication issues down the road. Can just tell them, your tired and need to take a night off to rest?
told my GF how i felt and she totally took it the wrong way.

we haven't been talking since Sunday.

I've gotten so much work done on my car and i generally feel so much less weight off my shoulders.
I know this sounds and looks really bad. but I don't "miss her" one bit.

*please don't respond, we all know what i should do..... or at least consider at this point
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by TOS'd View Post
The reason for Speak it Out is to actually set PK-EK up with someone, whether that be someone from this thread or outside of RS.
RSXspecialist@outlook.com
PK-EK is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-29-2021, 11:29 AM   #24941
Rs has made me the man i am today!
 
BIC_BAWS's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2013
Location: revscene
Posts: 3,293
Thanked 3,631 Times in 1,183 Posts
Quote:
Originally Posted by Euro7r View Post
Can just tell them, your tired and need to take a night off to rest?
Sounds like I responded too late, but I did this once, and my gf at the time took it as I didn't miss her / I don't want her anymore / I'm tired of her LOLOL

"You'd rather hang out with the boys than hang out with me" ... Yes. LOL
__________________
|| 97 E36 M3 Sedan || Arctic Silver | 5MT
|| RIP 02 E46 330ci | Schwartz Black II | 5MT | M-Tech II | Black Cube | Shadowline | Stoff Laser/Anthrazit | rip ||
|| RIP 02 E46 M3 | Carbon Black | 6MT ||

Quote:
Originally Posted by BICBAWS
aren't we glad I'm beating on a shitbox e36 and not an e46 M3?
Quote:
Originally Posted by JACK FROST
beating on a car is like anal sex ... there is a right and a wrong way to do it
BIC_BAWS is offline   Reply With Quote
This post thanked by:
Old 04-29-2021, 11:52 AM   #24942
I *heart* Revscene.net very Muchie
 
Euro7r's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Vancouver
Posts: 3,725
Thanked 1,045 Times in 446 Posts
Quote:
Originally Posted by BIC_BAWS View Post
Sounds like I responded too late, but I did this once, and my gf at the time took it as I didn't miss her / I don't want her anymore / I'm tired of her LOLOL

"You'd rather hang out with the boys than hang out with me" ... Yes. LOL
Sounds like those needy biatches or those that have literally zero hobbies (type that either goes to school and goes home, or goes to work and goes home, where their life is only surrounded by their 8-5 job/school).

When in a dating relationship, a person shouldn't really have to change to accommodate the lifestyle of the other person. If it's brutal now, imagine being married LOL. Guys have guy time and girls also have girl time, everyone needs their own time to do their own shit.
Euro7r is offline   Reply With Quote
This post thanked by:
Old 04-29-2021, 04:32 PM   #24943
Treasure Chest MOD
 
instantneedles's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Vancouver
Posts: 2,920
Thanked 1,560 Times in 691 Posts
Totally agree with you guys.

However, I wonder if she has mutual hobbies with you (ones that you both enjoy) that you can do together? The reason is, if you're both doing something together to achieve a goal, then it gives you a purpose for spending time together.

What I hated most about this one girl I dated was that we weren't doing any activities together, and when we hang out she just ends up talking about random stuff (mostly about her own life) and it gets very boring/emotionally draining. It wasn't that I hated being around her, it was that we weren't doing anything meaningful together.

some ideas might be: going to the gym, going for a walk/biking outdoors (trails, seawall), taking an improv class together, playing video games together, board games, etc.
__________________
BNWT Arcteryx Beta SL Hybrid Jacket Size Medium

There are no principles, there are only events. There is no good and bad, there are only circumstances. The superior espouses events and circumstances in order to guide them.
instantneedles is offline   Reply With Quote
This post thanked by:
Old 04-29-2021, 07:02 PM   #24944
Orgasm Donor & Alatar owned my ass twice!
 
6793026's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: BC, HK, USA
Posts: 6,876
Thanked 2,106 Times in 828 Posts
i insist on
1) alone time
2) boys time
3) joint times.

this way, you get to come back with diff perspectives which makes things much easier on each other.
6793026 is offline   Reply With Quote
This post thanked by:
Old 05-26-2021, 09:20 PM   #24945
My homepage has been set to RS
 
BlackV62K2's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2002
Location: Vancouver
Posts: 2,289
Thanked 424 Times in 166 Posts
Any of you gone to couple/marriage therapy? SO and I are looking for recommendations to help us work on our relationship.
BlackV62K2 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-27-2021, 10:59 AM   #24946
My dinner reheated before my turbo spooled
 
mikemhg's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2009
Location: Burnaby
Posts: 1,790
Thanked 1,896 Times in 696 Posts
Quote:
Originally Posted by BlackV62K2 View Post
Any of you gone to couple/marriage therapy? SO and I are looking for recommendations to help us work on our relationship.
I did with my ex of 11 years, back in the day. We used Mario Testani:

Consulting for Solutions Group

He's quite good, and did help with some of our issues over the years.

Alas, there was too much water under the bridge to fix our issues entirely.
mikemhg is offline   Reply With Quote
This post thanked by:
Old 05-30-2021, 09:09 AM   #24947
Treasure Chest MOD
 
instantneedles's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Vancouver
Posts: 2,920
Thanked 1,560 Times in 691 Posts
Quote:
Originally Posted by mikemhg View Post
I did with my ex of 11 years, back in the day. We used Mario Testani:

Consulting for Solutions Group

He's quite good, and did help with some of our issues over the years.

Alas, there was too much water under the bridge to fix our issues entirely.
What about the counselling did you find useful? Like what did he have you both do?

Also, are you comfortable sharing what drove you two apart?
__________________
BNWT Arcteryx Beta SL Hybrid Jacket Size Medium

There are no principles, there are only events. There is no good and bad, there are only circumstances. The superior espouses events and circumstances in order to guide them.
instantneedles is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-30-2021, 12:35 PM   #24948
My dinner reheated before my turbo spooled
 
mikemhg's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2009
Location: Burnaby
Posts: 1,790
Thanked 1,896 Times in 696 Posts
Good questions, and no, I don't mind at all.

To be honest, a family/marriage councilor is often times simply an arbitrator -- someone who is impartial and can listen to both sides in a disagreement, and offer a non-biased solution (or one would hope). That's primarily their role, for the most part they won't reinvent the wheel for you.

I found he helped us understand each other's mindsets better, and so highlight implicit bias that we both carried in certain disagreements. He really pushed the idea of simply learning to understand how we both tick, and how we may see things differently at times, and how that's not a bad thing. We can all have our own opinions, and that's not wrong to disagree. That kind of stuff.

In terms of what drove us apart, really just time. We started dating when I was 21, at that age (and much of my 20's), I was a total gasser. I partied a lot, went out with my buddies, meeting girls all the time, hooking up and coming home late. Much of that lifestyle broke the trust, and thus there was always a seething resentment on her part, most deservedly. Over time in the relationship that lifestyle certainly changed (especially in my now 30's), but the damage was already done.

We had become akin to roommates in the last years, good friends, we'd travel together and have good times, but the passion was long gone. Though we wouldn't fight often, but when we did, it just cut differently, deeper, we both knew we had clocked out on one another. The intimacy had long declined, the spark was gone. We discussed breaking up numerous times in the last few years of the relationship. Resentment is a killer -- once trust is lost and water under the bridge accumulates, it's impossible to ever bounce back.

Near the end of the relationship I went on vacation to the Philippines with my father as a bit of a bonding thing, during the trip I had cheated again. When I returned, I fessed up and confessed to what happened, she had a feeling and had known it would happen. At that point it was over, and we ended things amicably. To this day we're still friends, and we do meet up from time to time in order to catch up.

She'll always be a friend to me, and I'll always have her back for whatever she needs, I do love and care about her still to this day. Had we met in our 30's, things would've been certainly different, we simply met at the wrong time.

It goes to show her maturity and levelheadedness that we can still be amicable, and friends to this day, as I certainly don't deserve it, I'm just glad that she's learned to forgive me.

Long winded, but that's the abbreviated story there.
mikemhg is offline   Reply With Quote
This post thanked by:
Old 06-12-2021, 11:12 AM   #24949
GS8
Rs has made me the man i am today!
 
GS8's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2013
Location: The Fruit Loops
Posts: 3,047
Thanked 6,173 Times in 1,670 Posts
A girl asked me out last week. I only met her briefly as she's a friend of a friend. Nowhere near my bubble. I told her I was waiting until I get some more clarity on reopening / 2nd doses etc. because I live solo and work a specialized role (if I get sick, my company's fucked). She was totally cool with all that and absolutely still wants to meet up at a later time.

Then she tells me this morning a guy asked her out and she said yes.

My innards are imploding...

Now I might be jumping the gun and there won't be any spark between them but

My innards are imploding...
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by GS8 View Post
When I think about ewe, I touch myself
GS8 is offline   Reply With Quote
This post FAILED by:
Old 06-12-2021, 11:22 AM   #24950
Rs has made me the man i am today!
 
BIC_BAWS's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2013
Location: revscene
Posts: 3,293
Thanked 3,631 Times in 1,183 Posts
Just chill, she's just tryna make you jealous. But that's a fat mood, not that a girl has asked me out before, but another person in the picture.
__________________
|| 97 E36 M3 Sedan || Arctic Silver | 5MT
|| RIP 02 E46 330ci | Schwartz Black II | 5MT | M-Tech II | Black Cube | Shadowline | Stoff Laser/Anthrazit | rip ||
|| RIP 02 E46 M3 | Carbon Black | 6MT ||

Quote:
Originally Posted by BICBAWS
aren't we glad I'm beating on a shitbox e36 and not an e46 M3?
Quote:
Originally Posted by JACK FROST
beating on a car is like anal sex ... there is a right and a wrong way to do it
BIC_BAWS is offline   Reply With Quote
This post thanked by:
Reply
Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off



All times are GMT -8. The time now is 09:44 AM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.11
Copyright ©2000 - 2021, vBulletin Solutions Inc.
SEO by vBSEO ©2011, Crawlability, Inc.
Revscene.net cannot be held accountable for the actions of its members nor does the opinions of the members represent that of Revscene.net