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The thin line between love and hate
Mature discussion about understanding the opposite sex...

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Old 07-04-2018, 12:43 PM   #24226
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Old 07-04-2018, 08:44 PM   #24227
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it's been 2 months since you left. You said we had an incompatible lifestyle (which is probably not wrong). I tried to move on without you. Try dating new people, couldn't find the connection or spark. Then I try to move one by myself and revisit old hobbies and old friends. It is working.

Now you come back to me and say no matter how hard you try you cant forget me. Just like that two months of work undone with one simple message.
IGNORE her like the plague and NEVER give her the closure!
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Old 07-04-2018, 10:14 PM   #24228
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Now you come back to me and say no matter how hard you try you cant forget me. Just like that two months of work undone with one simple message.
Two months later... "Yeah you know what? I was wrong, it's actually not working out. Bye"

Is probably what's gonna happen



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Old 07-04-2018, 10:20 PM   #24229
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IGNORE her like the plague and NEVER give her the closure!


Come on, man. Don't do that. At least be a 1/2 decent guy and tell the girl you just can't do it.
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Old 07-05-2018, 02:04 PM   #24230
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Asking for a raise for the first time, and getting turned down sucks. It really sucks that they didn't even give me a bit of raise to throw me a frickin' bone. Been here for 12 years, too. Regularly going above and beyond means jack shit when they reason that it's just part of the job. FML.
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Old 07-05-2018, 02:25 PM   #24231
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Time to start looking for something new, maybe?

The way I see it is -- if you've been there for as long as you have, think that you have been reguarly going above and beyond of what is required from the job, and still get turned down with absolutely nothing at all, it is really time to move on. Management obviously thinks you are just another dispensible and easily replacable cog in the machine. If they don't care about employee rentention, why should you?

Last edited by Traum; 07-05-2018 at 02:31 PM.
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Old 07-05-2018, 02:32 PM   #24232
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^^^

Yeah. It's probably the kick I need to get motivated to look for a new place to work. It's not that I need more money or even want more money, but I felt really disrespected when they wouldn't even negotiate even a small raise.
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Old 07-05-2018, 10:53 PM   #24233
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Didn't go see that consellor yet, but I've started to go back to working out consistently. And it's helped with my mood tremendously. I know it's just putting a band aid on a problem. I think seeking help is a lot harder than I thought it would be.

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Old 07-10-2018, 07:37 AM   #24234
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The reason for Speak it Out is to actually set PK-EK up with someone, whether that be someone from this thread or outside of RS.

Last edited by PK-EK; 10-14-2021 at 10:34 AM.
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Old 07-10-2018, 09:57 AM   #24235
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I know that age is just a number; and its not about age. but I'm worried about stage in life.

She just started post secondary, and I have been in the working force for 7+ years now.

of course she thinks that its amazing that a guy can cook and clean and do adult stuff; because she has never really seen it before.

All i know is she understands me, and I understand her
That's what makes it special
That's the most important part if you want a good long term relationship, you guys gotta have the same goals and the same timeline.

Example would be if you want kids by 30 but she doesnt want kids for another 10 years then it wouldnt work.

Or if you want to settle down in the next few years but she still wants to see the world after she graduates.

But really, i say just yolo it. You found someone that you want to spend time with- then just do that. Enjoy the journey don't worry about the end goal. Even if it doesn't work out, at least you would have some good memories together. At the end of the day isn't that what dating is?
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Old 07-10-2018, 11:06 AM   #24236
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Originally Posted by PK-EK View Post
I know that age is just a number; and its not about age. but I'm worried about stage in life.

She just started post secondary, and I have been in the working force for 7+ years now.

of course she thinks that its amazing that a guy can cook and clean and do adult stuff; because she has never really seen it before.

All i know is she understands me, and I understand her
That's what makes it special
Same boast as you are expect is the opposite for me. Been dating this girl that's a few years older and man is day and night compare when I dated younger girls.

She knows how to take care of her body, very mature, knows how to cook and enjoys eating healthy, doens't need gifts at all and hates it when I pay for her. She is looking for someone who she can grow old with so gift doesn't matter (she actually got piss one time when I got a set of necklace or earings) and doesn't need me to pay for her (she pays more than me lol). For her having that connection and the ability to understand her feelings is much more important. Of course she knows what makes her feel good in bed and isn't afraid to let you know what she wants make things so much easier.
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Old 07-10-2018, 12:26 PM   #24237
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The reason for Speak it Out is to actually set PK-EK up with someone, whether that be someone from this thread or outside of RS.

Last edited by PK-EK; 10-14-2021 at 10:34 AM.
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Old 07-10-2018, 12:32 PM   #24238
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That sounds good!
Where can i get some of that? lol
Where older mature girls usually goes? Yoga place, gym, community centers? I meet mine through some group events.
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Old 07-10-2018, 02:01 PM   #24239
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Older girls are hard to find, not because they are rare, just the mentality shift has to take place between the 34-40 yr old. Many are stuck thinking of prince charming coming to rescue them.

They have to realize
1) The girls are NOT getting hit on as often because a) guys would be hitting on young girls than them. b) most of the eligible guys are also already married.

2) they standards are still very high.
I get this a lot "I have a nice car, apartment, job, i enjoy nice stuff (meals and accessories), why can't I find an awesome guy cause I'm such a good catch)." While it is true, please refer to Rule #1.... cause you're in your late 30s sister......
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Old 07-10-2018, 02:21 PM   #24240
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30+ yrs old is NOT old by any means for either gender. Guys especially, are both stupid and insane to think that 30+ yrs old girls are "old".
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Old 07-10-2018, 03:20 PM   #24241
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Quote:
Originally Posted by PK-EK View Post
I know that age is just a number; and its not about age. but I'm worried about stage in life.

She just started post secondary, and I have been in the working force for 7+ years now.

of course she thinks that its amazing that a guy can cook and clean and do adult stuff; because she has never really seen it before.
Seems like the a similar scenario like when I started going out with my wife. She was impressed with the difference in experience and maturity compared to guys her age (early 20s).

Quote:
All i know is she understands me, and I understand her
That's what makes it special
We 'clicked' on the first date, and then it was just talk about the future. After we knew that we didn't care for having any kids, it was just a matter of deciding when to get married. We've been married for almost 7 years, and it is awesome. It did take a while to adjust to married life, but we are a well-lubed machine, now
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Old 07-10-2018, 03:46 PM   #24242
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We 'clicked' on the first date, and then it was just talk about the future. After we knew that we didn't care for having any kids, it was just a matter of deciding when to get married. We've been married for almost 7 years, and it is awesome. It did take a while to adjust to married life, but we are a well-lubed machine, now
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Old 07-10-2018, 06:10 PM   #24243
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Don't know about you guys, I find the older the girls are, the more stuck up in the ass they are. Noticed some girls want this and that, but yet to realize they are in their 30's....A few more years of being "FIRM" on those unrealistic expectations, they'll be 40 and that'll be "old". I feel so much shift on "ME" first for these girls before anything else.

Not saying it's wrong to have certain expectations or desires, some just won't budge an inch. Younger ones, more YOLO, let's see how things go lol.
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Old 07-10-2018, 09:46 PM   #24244
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IMO it's important to have expectations and needs, but I think in our society a lot of people focus too much on what they want as opposed to what they can bring to the table.

When I was single, I met lots of girls... mostly Asian girls unfortunately... who wanted a guy in their 20s who was 6'0+, good looking, intelligent, with their own place, a nice car, a solid career, etc. Not to toot my own horn but I think I fit most of those categories rather well.

Then I'd find out the girl makes 30k a year from some shit job and lives at home, and blows all of her money on designer shit and lease payments on her CLA250. No degree, no ambition, "content" with that kind of life. Basically looking to make my successes her own.

Get the fuck outta here lol!
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Old 07-13-2018, 12:38 AM   #24245
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Didn't go see that consellor yet, but I've started to go back to working out consistently. And it's helped with my mood tremendously. I know it's just putting a band aid on a problem. I think seeking help is a lot harder than I thought it would be.

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have you considered trying cbd oil?
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Old 07-13-2018, 06:33 AM   #24246
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have you considered trying cbd oil?
For mental related stuff? I never considered weed as a solution to any problem. I see it similar to drinking me problems away.

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Old 07-13-2018, 08:49 AM   #24247
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For mental related stuff? I never considered weed as a solution to any problem. I see it similar to drinking me problems away.

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Look into it, non thc ones for mental health. Thc ones would probably make it worse.
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Old 07-13-2018, 09:06 AM   #24248
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Look into it, non thc ones for mental health. Thc ones would probably make it worse.
My thing with cbd is that you don't feel it, which is the point since it doesn't contain high amounts of THC, so you don't know if it's placebo or if it actually works. Funny thing is I've given cbd to my mom for her glaucoma and she said it worked wonders.

Treating glaucoma with cbd, is treating the symptoms and effects. I'm more interested in solving the root issue of why i do toxic things, rather than treating the symptom. I think treating a symptom is never ending, until you find the root cause of why the symptom happens.

100% agree that thc makes it worse, I find myself doing toxic things because idgaf on thc.
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Old 07-13-2018, 09:20 AM   #24249
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IMO it's important to have expectations and needs, but I think in our society a lot of people focus too much on what they want as opposed to what they can bring to the table.

When I was single, I met lots of girls... mostly Asian girls unfortunately... who wanted a guy in their 20s who was 6'0+, good looking, intelligent, with their own place, a nice car, a solid career, etc. Not to toot my own horn but I think I fit most of those categories rather well.

Then I'd find out the girl makes 30k a year from some shit job and lives at home, and blows all of her money on designer shit and lease payments on her CLA250. No degree, no ambition, "content" with that kind of life. Basically looking to make my successes her own.

Get the fuck outta here lol!
I died at CLA250. I had the exact same conversation with like two people about what they wanted and what they offered haha.
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Old 07-13-2018, 10:44 AM   #24250
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Fuck its happening again, im always there when you need someone to talk to but once you find someone new, you grow distant... I dont have the heart to cut you out but i know this isnt good for me, always being there for you when you need someone to talk too. Its ripping me apart again and i can feel that im getting attached to the idea of, if im there for you maybe just maybe ill have the chance to date you... Beta as fuck.
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